ughh I slaved over the latest chapter of Confessions of Kiley Trace with my "loyal" (and slightly threatening) reviewers hounding me- I post it... and no one even read it!! XD wtf? lol!! Anyway It's 6:38 AM and I didn't go to sleep last night, so I'm a little tired. Coffee's brewing, so I thought I'd do a little typing. =] And I feel the need to say something I didn't say earlier. Kairi's last name is pronounced "al-kay-mime" lol.
Perfect teeth. She stared up at his shining white smile. He held her in a warm, fatherly embrace. He adored me.
Change now. The happy atmosphere fades, and suddenly all she sees is a gathering darkness. Growing quiet. She's running. Not really running, it's more of a quick jog. One foot in front of the other. He's behind her. He'll hurt me.
It's changing again. She can't run now; her legs are in slow motion. She's in the water. It's cold and she doesn't want to be there. Someone's fingers brush her arm, and she hears a voice say, "Kairi." The girl giggles. Her skin glows, her dark curls are plastered to her perfect face. She's gorgeous. She whispers, "Can't you swim?" She feels her head shake, turns toward shore, and sees him. Same hair, same eyes. Kayle! Kayle, what are you doing here? But she couldn't talk. She couldn't change her memories. Her mouth wouldn't work. She was a prisoner within her own body. He glares. She looks next to him, at a boy with long, shaggy blond hair and eyes of the brightest blue, like he'd taken little peices of the moon instead of a normal eye color. Travis? She wonders, and suddenly it changes.
She's walking away. Walking, dirt crunching beneath her bare feet, her shoulders baked by the sun.
"Watch it," he calls. "The woods have never liked you."
"Is that a threat?" She masks the note of fear with a bitter tone. When's he going to kill me? He starts walking toward her, his body language more than threatening, and she prepares for his arrival...
Kairi woke up, gasping, her throat aching and dry, at six o'clock the next morning; everyone else remained asleep. Careful not to wake Wrath, she gently stood up, the floorboard creaking slightly beneath her shoes (she'd forgotten to take them off the night before) and started to stretch. It felt so good and natural. Who taught me that? Was it the man from my memory? The one with the white teeth? Who was he? What's wrong with me? She sighed and stood up. Her feet hurt from sleeping with her shoes on. She'd need new clothing, but she wasn't about to ask Teacher for anything. She stood up and looked out the window, and the setting sun flashed in front of her eyes, momentarily blinding her.
"Am I supposed to feel sorry for you just 'cuz' your family was a bunch of psychotic idiots?"
"Why won't you just leave me alone?
"Because I told you I loved you and all you could do was cry to me about your poor, deluded parents!"
Kairi sank to her knees, gripping the hair just above each of her ears. The voices... they were so loud. One of them was her's. But who was the other boy? The one she was fighting with? What's happening to me? It was like before, in the woods, when she'd remembered what that boy had said to her. Just the sound, no words, like when you were listening to someone speak but you weren't watching them.
"Well I'm so sorry I wasn't born with your perfect little life!"
"Cut the crap, Kairi! I said I love you, wasn't that supposed to mean something to you? Cuz a lot of girls would kill to hear me say that to them!"
"What was I supposed to do? Say it and not mean it?"
"That might've made me feel a little better! It was my birthday! Couldn't you have just lied, like you do so well?"
"I don't toy with people's emotions, that's why!"
They were so loud! Her ears were ringing. It was like having someone play a high note on an electric guitar with your ear pressed against the amp.
"You- you just shut up! Shut up, Kairi! If it weren't for me you'd still be walking! Probably for the rest of your life!"
"Yeah? Well, it's better than being here with you! I never said my parents were psychotic idiots. Maybe you are." There was a pause. "Let me go! Let go of me!"
Then her own high-pitched scream filled her covered them with her hands, but it's hard to block out a sound that's coming from inside your own head. She took one hand and slapped herself across the cheek, loud enough to almost wake Wrath but also hard enough to stop her own scream.
She stood up then, frustrated, and walked out of the room. Teacher had food on the table. By that time she was so hungry she would've eaten Wrath without questions, and when Teachers gently said, "Eat" she didn't need a second invitation. She only ate a plate, and then she felt fine. I hate food. She realized.
"Do you want me to call you Teacher or Izumi?" Kairi looked up at her, her hazel eyes bright and her aching throat feeling blistered. She was starting to lose her voice.
"Izumi is fine, since I'm not really your teacher." She offered that classic, motherly smile. I love that smile. It makes me all warm and fuzzy inside. =]
"Okay. Well, Izumi, I haven't been totally honest with you." She took off her sweatshirt sleeve, noting that, thanks to the blackberry bushes, the sweatshirt was already torn and dirty.
Teacher's eyes widened a little when she saw it, then she sat down at the table, her pretty face in her delicate hands, and she looked warmly at Kairi. "Do you know what the word 'serenity' itself actually means?"
"No," she replied honestly.
"It means 'a state of tranquility, or peace.'"
"So what does it mean? Why would I have had it tattooed to my arm?"
"It could be that you were in a state where you were incredibly happy and at peace and you wanted everyone that saw you to know that, or maybe you were the exact opposite: miserable and angry. And you wanted serenity, so you had it put there, hoping it would bring more happiness to your life."
She's so forgiving. Is this why Wrath loves her so much? "There's something else, too."
"What else?"
"When I told you I remember everything up until I was around eight, it wasn't true. Because, I do remember I had a good memory, and peices of my childhood are still missing. And it just scares the crap out of me." Her fading voice cracked and she blinked back tears, her left hand finding its way to the tattoo on her arm. "Like maybe I'm this thing that shouldn't be here, like I was never born or I was never supposed to exist. I learned about it with someone. I don't remember who. And that's what upsets me, too. Because I'm afraid that I'm this- this thing and I don't even know what it is."
Teacher leaned back in her chair and studied her seriously. "Kairi, I can almost definetely and completely assure you that you are not a humonculus."
Kairi blinked. Sal. Sal. Sal. Every thing she remembered about the lovely, elderly man came back to her then. "Sal! It was Sal! He's the one that made me brush my teeth and drink tea and be flexible!" She leaned back and stared hard at her empty plate. "Now I remember. He taught me about alchemy. He told me I could do something I shouldn't be able to do. That's what was scaring me."
"What was it?" Teacher got up and poured a glass of water. Even she was noticing the soreness in Kairi's voice.
"I don't know. I can't remember that part. It's still a little iffy." She paused to take a sip of water. The cool liquid ran down her throat. "But he's dead. I know he is. I don't even remember him, and I miss him so much."
"It's understandable. I have a feeling he meant something to you."
Wrath appeared in the kitched doorway, yawning. "I'm hungry."
"Breakfast is ready. Ed and Al won't be up for a while." I'm fairly certain that Al doesn't sleep, lol, but he's waiting for Ed to get up, kk?
"Izumi?" Kairi's pride was going to be hurt, but she had to ask. "Could I borrow some money? I kind of tore up my clothes yesterday and I need to buy some new ones. I'll pay you back- with- with interest, if I can, but-"
"How did you tear up your clothes?" Teacher raised an eyebrow while she was shoveling bacon and eggs on to Wrath's plate.
She looked at the floor. "I fell on top of a blackberry bush." She ran a hand through her white-blond hair. I have my mother's hair, my father's eyes. She suddenly remembered.
"Oh, ouch!" Wrath squeaked. He dug into his breakfast.
"You don't owe me anything, Kairi," Teacher smile that same, beautiful smile and took a small wad of cash out of her dress pocket. "Is this enough."
"More so. Thank you, Izumi." Kairi smiled. I am sooo paying her back anyway.
Ed and Al appeared in the doorway, ready to eat (Ed was, anyway). Ed started to make his own plate, and Al sat at the table.
"Thanks, again. I'll just be a little while. It won't take long. I'm not picky." She kissed Teacher's cheek and ran out the door, her long hair behind her. While she was walking up the street she suddenly remembered cutting it herself. She had just been walking, and she was so sick of it always getting in her face, she took the bangs in the front, and sliced all the way down them at an angle. Her hair was now parted to the side, but she let it grow long.
There was a store up ahead. She'd sort of halfway lied to Teacher before- she wasn't totally picky, but she didn't like to wear something that made her look stupid. Her brain was telling her she liked practical clothing, things she could move around in. She went up to the rack and selected a pair of black short shorts immediately. They were one of the things she'd always worn. A black belt with them, and a light blue tanktop. No point in hiding the tattoo now. She still felt this little feeling of wonder in the back of her mind. What could 'serenity' possibly mean? She grabbed a black hoodie in case it got cold and a pair of black skater shoes.
The blue hoodie was a gift. But who gave it to me? A girl flashed through her mind. That absolutely stunning, impossibly beautiful girl she'd seen in her sort of memory/dream she'd had the night before. It was her. She meant so much to me once and now I don't even remember her name.
She grabbed a pair of spandex shorts and a black spaghetti strap for bed. The money Teacher has given her was just enough to pay for it. She left the store with a bag in her hand and started walking slowly up the street. Small towns are so nice. The kind of place where no one has to lock their doors because everyone can trust each other. A hand clamped over her mouth out of nowhere, and she tried to cry out, but she was dragged roughly into an alley and held against the wall. Him again? She bit his hand.
"Augh!!" He jumped back. I love it when people make that sound lol.
"Kayle! What the hell was that?"
"Kairi, you've gotta come back. Travis is sorry for what happened, and-"
"Not this again." He had her pressed against the wall, and she pushed him off of her. "Listen, Kayle, I'm really not in the mood to run away from everything right now."
"You didn't have a problem with doing that before." He looked at her, as if expecting a look of guilt to cross her face.
"I can't go anywhere with you. If I left it was for a reason. I only remember like two things about this Travis guy and I'm pretty sure he wasn't the nice, sweet boy you make him out to be." She tried to side-step out of the alley, but Kayle blocked the way.
"He loves you."
"Well, that's cool."
"You were his girlfriend, and you left him."
"Don't remember. And if he's your bestest friend he's got to be about your age, and what are you, like forty? This guy's much too old for me." With a sweet smile, she tried to push past him, but he stepped in the way again.
"I'm fifteen, almost sixteen, and he's fourteen. You're thirteen."
"Well, awesome."
"Just come back. You'll remember."
"Not going."
"Why not?"
"A, I'm having an episode of amnesia, in case you hadn't noticed, B, I'm not going to run off with some guy I technically hardly know, and C, I have a boyfriend."
"What? Who?" Kayle looked like he'd been punched.
"Uhm, that blond guy that was with me yesterday. Ed. He's my boyfriend." That one's gonna come back and bite me in the-
"Are you serious?"
"Yes, so if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go back to the house in which I reside currently, back to my new friends, my new boyfriend, and I advise you quit stalking me." She darted around him unexpectedly, skidded on her heels, and ran all the way down the street, the shopping bag bumping against her thigh and Kayle's eyes burning a hole into her back.
THAT was a long chapter. For pictures, I'm putting up a link in my profile to a photobucket account specifically for pictures involving Story Of My Life. Thanks for reading and- hopefully- reviewing. =]
