2258- May

Caris made a quick call to Galia as she pulled on a sweater over her blue silk cami and white cotton sleep pants. "Galia, call Nyota in a few minutes, tell her you're coming over. She just broke it off with Spock. She might need a buddy."

"Mhmm," Galia said, half-asleep. "Where you gunna be?"

"Spock needs me tonight. I'll be there for Ny tomorrow." She said softly, hating having to choose between them.

"Yea, he's got no one, she's got me tonight. She'll understand. Shoo." Galia said before ending the conversation.

With her feet bare Caris headed down the hall, hoping no one would catch her dressed as she was. Happily she reached Spock's rooms without meeting anyone. She keyed in her personal code, knowing it would admit her. The door wooshed open and she stepped in to find Spock sitting in a chair at his table. A pint of her favorite ice cream sat on the table with two spoons.

She walked in and sat beside Spock, having to drag a chair to his side of the table. Gingerly, not sure if he would welcome the touch, she laced her fingers with his. As far as she knew, so long as their palms weren't touching it wasn't an intimate gesture… To her surprise his fingers tightened on hers, his dark eyes were haunted.

"She was afraid of me Chris." He murmured, his voice calm but much, much softer than usual.

She sighed. There was nothing she could say to that, most everyone had been afraid. Every one but her and Jim…

"Jim wasn't." She said softly. Those dark brows lifted slightly. She smiled. "Seriously, Jim knew you wouldn't hurt him. I think he met the older you on Delta Vega, otherwise how would he know you were emotionally compromised? He believed that you two could be friends, and that you wouldn't kill him."

Those eyes darkened. "I would have. I was going to." He admitted.

She shook her head. "No, you wouldn't have. I know you, I felt what you felt. You didn't want him dead, just… to shut up. Once he passed out, you would have let him go." She knew he needed to think about something else, she searched for something else to say, but he wouldn't let it go.

"You were not afraid." He said softly.

She squeezed his fingers. "I am never afraid of you, Spock. You would never hurt me." She could feel his self-loathing, his fear, his pain, and his relief. Was the relief because of her?

"Nyota said… if she loved me more that she would have trusted me enough to not be afraid." Caris wasn't sure where the statement was going, she didn't know what to say. "Do you feel love for me?" He asked softly.

Spock could feel her shock, she had not expected him to ask. He almost felt guilty for using the connection of their minds to determine if she was lying, or less than honest with herself as Nyota had obviously been, but he had to protect himself… he did not want to hurt again as he was hurting.

Chris smiled, her fingers tightening slightly on his. "Of coarse I do, Spock." 'Always, forever' her mind added. "You're my closest friend, I don't think I could love another being more." 'Just differently' she added silently, to herself and to him. He felt terrible for prying, but he had to know.

"What about Dr. McCoy." He asked softly, knowing there was some romantic bond between them.

Her mind was filled with images of the man and a tangle of her own emotions, all of them warm and welcoming, the same emotions she had for him except these weren't quite as strong as the ones she had for him. But there was a hot, dark emotion too, one he didn't know the name for but it made his blood hot in a most… pleasant way.

"Bones?" She asked. "Bones is my friend. I adore him, love him like I love you, Jim, Galia, and Nyota. You are all my friends." She hesitated only half a second before adding. "Sure, there's a bit of… lust between us." She winked. "I like 'em tall, dark, and brooding. And preferably intelligent, I do detest stupidity."

He could not help the amusement he felt, that mirrored her own. So the dark feeling… it was lust. "And the Capitan?"

She actually laughed. "Jim? Like you, he's my friend. I might not be as attached to him as I am you, but that's not really saying much. The only person who I'm as fond of as you is my Dad." There was no dark heat, no lust, in her heart for Jim.

"Why do you ask about Jim?" She asked softly.

He would not lie to her. "You kissed him." He said, trying to keep the accusatory tone from his voice.

She shrugged. "I said I would, a reward for him saving all our asses." Spock would have scowled had it not been entirely illogical. Spock had helped, Jim would have failed were it not for him… "I would have offered you the same but I didn't think it would appeal to you very much."

"Also I was in a relationship." He said softly.

She shrugged. "Eh, Ny would have been okay with one kiss as a thank you. You wouldn't have been." She clarified. She smiled and scooped up the ice cream, extricating her fingers from his. "Let's eat before this melts too much."

"I thank you, but no. I am not in the mood for… sweet confections." He admitted.

She rolled her eyes at him. "One bite. You'll like this flavor." She pulled off the lid and flashed him a smile. "And thanks for remembering my favorite." She offered him a spoonful of the swirling pink/red, blue, and yellow ice.

With a mental, suffered sigh, one he would never, ever vocalize, he took the offered spoon and tasted the cold substance. It was sweet, but not over poweringly so, and quite tart. He cleaned off the spoon and caught her smile. "It is not displeasing." He admitted.

She laughed. "Yea, I love it too." She placed the tub between them. "Dig in, you've got to have half or I'll gain like ten pounds." He doubted that she would gain such a large amount of weight from so little food but said nothing, instead taking another spoonful of the treat.

"Why are we indulging?" He asked her after a few mouthfuls.

"It's called comfort food, Spock. A food we enjoy, one we think tastes great, that puts us in better moods." She said in a very… educational voice that amused him. He doubted it was the food that had helped his mood as food had little significance to him other than sustenance. Instead he thought that his increased serenity was due mostly to the company. He said nothing, simply content to enjoy the comfortable silence they had fallen into.

2251 - Last Week of May

The bridge was tense for the first few days after the break up but Spock noticed, after a few days, things relaxed back into the normal flow. He had a sneaking suspicion Caris had something to do with that. She ate her meals with certain crew members, talking softly with them, and later those crew members would relax around him more. He wondered if the entire crew knew he had ended his relationship with Nyota…

He was wandering the halls when he learned the answer to that question. Two ensigns stood, wearing the engineering red, talking between themselves.

"I can't believe he let a fine thing like her go." One said.

"Yea, and he like, didn't seem to care." The other interjected. "Does he like… even feel emotions? I mean come on, he should have been a little upset."

He tensed, his emotions fighting his control. It was… insulting that they assume he had no emotions, did not feel hurt, and that they gossiped about him period. He was their C.O., they ought to respect him. He felt… he felt… angry? He stopped and tried to control himself when a soft hand brushed his shirt-clad arm and Chris strode past him, her every step betraying the anger she tried to keep controlled.

"You two," she snapped, forcefully, "speaking so of your C.O. is deeply inappropriate. If you wish to gossip do so in your quarters and pray your roommates don't rat you out." He saw her straighten, and was impressed that she seemed so much taller, though she was painfully short. The two ensigns cowered. "If I so much as hear a rumor you have been speaking ill of our C.O.s then I will personally see to it you get the most disgusting, time consuming, exhausting assignments on board. Am I understood?"

"Y… yes Ma'am." They said, nodding and scurrying away, even though he was quite sure they were both, in fact, older than Chris.

He walked to her side. "They are gossiping about how you and I are having an affair." He told her, hearing them whispering from a few corridors down. "You're defense of me is their 'proof'." Although they were not making a logical conclusion, her defense of him could have had many possible reasons, he found he was not quite annoyed by their assumption.

"I know." She said, tapping her own Vulcan ears. "But it's better than them calling you emotionless."

"You did not have to respond to them." He said softly, falling into step with her as she continued on her way.

She shrugged. "I was angry, Spock. As your friend I'm allowed to get angry when people insult you. And allowed to react to that angry if I see fit."

"You made a decision based solely upon your emotion." He said, "It is a very … illogical thing to do."

"No it's not." She countered. He lifted an eyebrow, amused she would deny his logic. "If one makes a decision based upon a positive emotion, like love or friendship, then it is NEVER illogical. Because regardless of the outcome, you did the right thing. If you don't… you'll always wonder what would have happened, and hate yourself for not doing it."

"The solution is to feel no emotion." He stated.

She smiled sadly. "That would solve the conundrum, Spock, but would you really want to live your life without knowing love?" He felt the rush of the hot, sweet emotion in his blood and knew she was making him feel it, but he wasn't angry with her for the intrusion. She was making a point…

And, he decided, it was a very valid one. He would seriously regret never feeling that particular emotion again. "You have a valid, if illogical, point." He told her and she smiled. The hot emotion, which was clearly not his own, faded but in it's place was a warm contentedness that was entirely his own.

2251 – June

Spock began to spend more time with Jim, finding he greatly enjoyed the Capitan's presence, particularly as he understood that the flirtation between said man and Chris was solely for their own entertainment. Often the three of them, or the four if Dr McCoy joined, would be found after their shift playing Chess in a recreation room.

One evening Chris sighed. "Alright, I'm sick of chess. How about something more… active."

Spock looked up at her, she had just beaten McCoy in a rather swift game of chess, as she reclined in her chair. "What do you have in mind?" He asked her.

"Something more entertaining, if also more juvinile."

"I am not playing Spin the Bottle." McCoy said quickly. "Too many men, not nearly enough women."

Chris laughed and Spock had the sneaking feeling that the game mentioned was one of… intimate contact. She obviously noticed his discomfort. "No, no. No games involving stripping or kissing, or any sort of inappropriate contact. I had a much more… entertaining idea."

Jim cackled. "I do love it when you decide to be trouble. It so suits you." As much as Spock didn't want to agree he found he had to. The mischevious glint in Charis' blue and green eyes made his stomach clench in a most… odd way. But it was still pleasant.

"Us four, Scotty, Chekov, and Sulu, will all reconviene here in twenty minutes with our favorite form of booze. And we shall play 'I've never'." Chris said, grinning. McCoy and Jim burst out laughing.

"And the purpose of this game?" Spock asked.

"To be the least smashed in the end and to have learned the most about your crew members." She grinned. "It's a drinking game Spock. In which a person says something they've never done and all those who HAVE done it will take a drink."

He considered it for a short while. "I shall play." He finally conseaded, because he knew she wanted him to and because he doubted he would have to drink much as he was likely one of the most… innocent crew members on board.

Chris grinned. "Okay, twenty minutes, Jim, call the boys."

Twenty three minutes later they were collected back in the abandoned rec room, each person holding a bottle of something alcoholic in their hands. Chris held a mug of 'Cider' which had a fairly low percent alcohol; Jim, Scotty, and McCoy each held bottled of Amberian Fire Whiskey; Sulu, Chekov and Spock each had a bottle of wine.

"You three are such pansies." Jim teased.

Chris slapped the Capitan before Spock could retaliate. "Chekov is technically underage Jim, Sulu is our PILOT, and Spock is Vulcan, his physiology has a much more… potent reaction to booze than a humans. Leave them alone."

Jim pouted. "Fine, fine. But I'm going first." Chris nodded. "I've never fathered a kid."

"Bastard." McCoy muttered before taking a sip of his drink. Chris snickered.

"I've newer kissed someone before." Chekov admitted, blushing. Everyone took a sip.

"Poor love," Chris said. "I could fix that for you if you want. I know a cute little engineer who thinks your just the bees knees." Chekov looked estatic. "I'll introduce you at breakfast." She promised. Spock felt a ripple of something warm. She was always trying to help people…

"I've never kissed a man." Sulu said. Chris rolled her eyes and took a drink, Jim joined her. Everyone gave Jim an odd look.

"What?!" He asked. "I was like ten, and he was cute." Everyone but Spock chuckled. He would have to ask Chris about the humor in that later, on Vulcan same-sex relations was not at all looked down upon…

"I have never experienced a Vulcan Mind Meld." Chris admitted, "Though I would sort of like to, sounds intriguing." Jim blushed and took a drink. Spock caught Chris' eye, she had guessed it.

"I have never gotten into a drunken bar brawl." He said, guessing most of his companions had.

Everyone except Chekov took a drink. Spock lifted an eyebrow at Chris. She blushed. "I was in Academy. Some jerk mocked you and I was pretty drunk… I might have said a few smart-mouthed things." His brow went higher. "In my defense he swung at me first." Jim and McCoy laughed.

"Yer cannae ask fer a better friend than tha', Mr. Spock." Scotty said, grinning. "And Aye 'ave neva stolen nothin'." Jim and Chekov both took drinks, the latter looking ashamed and sheepish, the former looking amused.

"Nobody ask." McCoy warned. "I have never used a trashy pick up line, even as a joke."

Spock looked confused, mentally taking note to ask Chris later about 'pick-up lines'. Jim, Chekov, Sulu, and Scotty took a drink.

The game ontinued for another round without being fairly inappropriate. Spock did not have to take a second sip though Chris had two more. Jim had a drink on nearly everyone's turn, so when it was his turn for the third time he was well on the way to being drunk and more than ready to start saying the more… crude things.

"I've never had sex in any part of Engineering." Jim said, grinning like a loon.

Blushing Scotty took a drink. "I SO did not need that mental image." Chris groaned, leaning sideways onto Sulu's shoulder, her eyes closed.

"I hawe a good one." Chekov said, grinning. "I hawe newer had sex."

"Point of clarification." Chris asked, her cheeks nearly emerald green. "Are you talking sex as in intercourse or as in oral?" Spock turned a shade of green to match Chris' as he officially learned something about her he DIDN'T want to know. Jim laughed, McCoy looked interested, Sulu tried NOT to look at her.

"Well… I was talking intercourse." Chekov answered slowly. Chris didn't take a drink, but Jim, McCoy, Sulu and Scotty did.

"I have never forgotten the name of my partners by the next morning." Sulu said. Only Jim drank.

Chris grinned. "I have never had sex with someone and not known their name at the time." Again Jim drank. No one was very surprised.

"Hey!" Jim said loudly. "What is this, get Jim drunk night?"

"Is it not that night every night, Capitan?" Spock asked, lifting an eyebrow. Everyone laughed.

"Oh my God," Jim said, "did you just make a joke?!"

"No, it was simply a question." Spock said but he caught the knowing look in Chris' eyes. "And I have never gone dancing."

Chris sighed. "Spock, Spock, Spock. What am I ever going to do with you?" She took a drink, as did everyone else.

"Spock, you're supposed to keep with the flow of the game!" Jim whined.

Before Spock could reply Scotty said, "Aye 'ave neva snuck out of a lady's bed before she woke up." Jim and McCoy both drank.

It was very apparent to Chris that Jim was well on his way to being drunk, and so were Scotty and Bones. No one else seemed to be buzzed. She figured it was because they'd all chosen drinks that weren't as strong.

"I hav never been to Vulcan!" Jim said, falling from the crude theme with a wicked glint in his eyes. Chris fought a giggle. He wanted Spock to drink more. She and Spock both drank.

Chekov seemed to get the idea because he said, "I hawe newer beaten my first officer while on the bridge." Spock gave him a blank stare (a Vulcan glare) and taken another sip.

"I have never understood the appeal of pointed ears." Sulu said, apparently expecting Spock to drink. He did not but McCoy, Jim, and Chris did, all of them blushing.

"They're cute on her!" Jim said, pointing to Chris, who blushed a further green.

"I second that." Bones said, making her want to hide her face in her hands.

Chris didn't want to admit that she thought Spock's ears were kinda sexy so she said quickly, "I plead the fifth." They tried to needle her reason out of her but she said quickly, giving a pointed look to Spock. "I have never received or given a Vulcan kiss."

"What's a Wulcan kiss?" Chekov asked.

Spock leveled a curious look at her before taking a sip of his wine. He turned to Chekov. "It is a gesture on Vulcan that is much like the Earth kiss on the lips, intimate. It is a touch of palm to palm." Chris noted that he didn't mention that there was more to it, ways to make it more intimate, more sensual. Like the nuances of French kissing versus a peck.

"You've never had one?" Bones asked her. "But you spent some time on Vulcan."

She frowned. "Yes, well I was too busy getting bullied. I've seen them, but never experienced one."

Spock gave her a level look. "I have never had… what did you call it? Oral sex."

Chris spluttered but took a drink, so did everyone else except Chekov. "That is so mean." She told him, pouting.

She saw the laughter in his eyes. "On the contrary, I am simply paying you back in kind for your last statement." He quipped.

"I've never flirted with a Vulcan." Scotty said. No one drank. "Hey now," Scotty said. "That there was flirting you two!" The others nodded.

Chris blushed. "We weren't flirting. We were teasing." She insisted. Spock had that slight wrinkle between his brows like he wasn't sure what was going on.

"It's flirting." Jim slurred, grinning. "Now drink, both of you." They did.

"Last turn," Bones said, looking around but pointedly at Jim. "We need to be bright-eyed and bushy-tailed for tomorrow morning." He lifted his drink. "and I have never been turned on by a spaceship, an engine, a car, or any other inanimate object with a propulsion system."

A blushing Chekov was the first to drink, followed by Jim, Scotty (no surprise there), and Sulu. Chris burst out laughing. "Sulu? Chekov? No, no, let me guess. When you turn on the Enterprise she returns the favor?" Bones joined her in laughing.

They stood and left, Sulu and Chekov helping one another, Scotty wandering away alone, Jim being half dragged by Bones, and Spock joined Chris. When alone he turned to her and asked. "What was the point of the game again?"

Spock looked down at Chris. She was slightly flushed, her pale skin the slightest green. She had finished her pint but she did not seem inebriated. He asked her the point of the game.

She smiled. "To get to know one another, Spock. To get a chance to laugh at one another and ourselves." She snickered. "Especially Jim." She looked worried. "Didn't you have fun?"

He shook his head slightly. "No, I… I found it amusing and intriguing." He could look up some things on his own, like 'oral sex' ) although he thought he understood the idea without looking it up he would check to be sure) and pick-up lines. "Are all Humans so wary of same sex unions?" He asked.

She shook her head. "No, not really. But Jim prides himself on being a womanizer and totally masculine. We were just teasing him."

"Ah," he said softly. "Why are you curious of a Mind Meld? It is… very intimate. With whom would you wish to go through one?"

She blushed a slightly darker green than her flush. "It just… it sounds wonderful. To know a person's mind so well, to know they can't be lying because how can you lie in your own mind?"

"So there is no… specific being with whom you would desire to meld with?" He asked, feeling relieved that she seemed simply curious.

"No." She said, smiling. "No one. It's just… it sounds wonderful, to not be alone in your thoughts, for someone to completely understand you…" Her voice was wistful, longing.

"I am surprised your Mother never gave you a Vulcan Kiss. Mine did so often." He admitted, letting her know more about him.

She smiled sadly. "Amanda was showing affection in the appropriate way for a mother to her Vulcan child, Spock. My Mother was shunned by Vulcans. She considered herself Betaziod, not Vulcan, and as such only taught me the language because she felt she had to. All the cultural understanding I have is from my visit to Vulcan as a child." The very thought made him… sad. He wished she were more accepted by their people.

"So you do not know if it would affect you the same as it does Vulcans." He asked, wondering it himself. Was she Vulcan enough that the caress would stimulate her nerves as they did a Vulcans? He was aware that her hands were more sensitive than a humans, but did that translate to her feeling the caress the same way he did? He was oddly curious to find out…

He clamped down on the feeling and shoved it away. "Naw," she answered him, "I wouldn't know. But I'd guess so… I HOPE so. I don't want to be denied that… if I ever get the chance." They had long since arrived at her door. "It's late, Spock. I'll see you in a few hours for breakfast."

He nodded. "Indeed. Good night Chris."

She leaned up and pressed her lips very gently to his cheek. "Good night Spock. Thanks for walking me to my rooms." She slid into said rooms and the door hissed closed.

Once in the privacy of his rooms Spock touched his cheek, where her lips had caressed his skin. It tingled pleasantly. He knew, logically, that humans offered kisses on the cheek for many reasons, as thanks, as congratulations, even as greetings. And he knew Chris to use them as such, but he had never felt her do so. He was… pleased, that she had. And that disturbed him slightly.