Hot damn! That last story went over really well with you guys. Mental note made to include more make-outs.


Day Nine

Fake Dating


"Zuko! Stop slumping and stand up straight. We're never going to get inside if we can't make this convincing."

Zuko glared at Sokka under heavily mascaraed lashes. His face itched from the layers of powder and paint that had been applied to disguise his masculine features and his waist ached from being tightly cinched to give the illusion of feminine curves. Not to mention how the heavy wig of black hair just wouldn't sit quite right on his head. All in all, he didn't think he'd ever felt so uncomfortable and he made sure to relay that to the younger man walking beside him in the fierceness of his glare.

"And stop glaring," Sokka tacked on, elbowing him in the side. "Ladies don't glare."

On the contrary, Zuko didn't think he'd ever met a girl who hadn't perfected the art of glaring. Leaving that aside, he addressed Sokka in a rough whisper. "If you have so many opinions, why don't you wear the dress? We both know you'd be better at acting the part."

"Because," Sokka shot back, "you're the pretty boy. I'm too ruggedly handsome to dress in drag." He made a show of scratching the meager beginnings of a beard that patched his chin proudly. He'd begun growing it just two weeks back and it still had a long way to go in Zuko's opinion.

Zuko sighed. "Let's just get this over with. The sooner we get inside, the sooner I can take this stupid disguise off. I'll never live it down if someone recognizes me while dressed like this. Imagine what the papers will say."

Sokka raised a hand in front of himself and spread his fingers. "Fire Lord Embraces His Feminine Side. What Does This Mean for the Royal Lineage?"

Zuko scowled and elbowed Sokka harshly.

"Ouch!" Sokka yelped and rubbed his side. "Jeez, you don't have to get that upset about it. Besides, I'm a pretty good catch."

Zuko said nothing to that. They were coming up on their target now—a premier and very posh social club called Huinong in the heart of Ba Sing Se's Upper Ring. Inside, a Fire Nation governor wanted for international crimes was about to make a deal with the head of a notorious Earth Kingdom crime syndicate that had cropped up just after the end of the war. After weeks of chasing the man, Zuko, with Katara's help, had traced the man to this location. Unfortunately, the club had a very strict rule that barred entry to single men. Any man without a VIP pass had to be accompanied by a woman. Huinong was, after all, that kind of place.

And that was precisely the reason Sokka's help had been enlisted. Aang had been uncomfortable about Katara entering such an establishment and Zuko agreed with him. Aang was too recognizable to go himself, so Sokka had been brought in to be Zuko's backup. They hadn't known about the single man rule until they tried to enter earlier that night and had been turned away. So it was that their current plan had been hastily concocted. One trip to the market and a shoddy makeup job by Sokka later, they once again found themselves standing before the entrance to the club.

The bouncer at the door, a large, burly man dressed in emerald silk eyed them impassively as they approached. "Sokka of the Southern Water Tribe," he said in a business tone, clearly remembering him from an hour earlier. His brown eyes shifted over to Zuko next and despite his trained stoicism one of his eyebrows rose. "And this is…?"

Zuko tried not to grunt as one of Sokka's arms came around him and pulled him against his side. "This is my girlfriend. Zu—" Zuko elbowed him again sharply and Sokka quickly improvised. "—la."

"Zula?" the bouncer repeated. He leaned in close and inspected Zuko's face with interest. Zuko turned his cheek in an effort to hide his makeup-disguised scar and batted his lashes. "Hi," he greeted the man in a pitched-up voice.

The bouncer reached out and touched Zuko's chin, delicately turning his face toward him. Zuko gulped nervously and tried not to jump away from the man. Spirits, there was no way this guy wasn't going to recognize him this close. The man turned his chin this way and that, getting a good, solid look at him, then, to Zuko's great surprised he released him and turning back to Sokka said, "To think a shrimpy guy like you could bag such a babe. There's just no justice in this world." He shook his head in disbelief and waved for the two of them to pass.

Zuko felt Sokka's arm around him stiffen in consternation. He opened his mouth to protest but Zuko stopped him by placing a hand on his cheek and turning his face toward him. He gave Sokka a warning glare and in the same high-pitched voice from before said, "Let's go, honey. The good man is letting us in."

Sokka looked like he desperately wanted to defend himself but at Zuko's glare he managed to rein in the urge. He still shot the bouncer an insulted look as they passed but to Zuko's relief he said nothing.

The moment they were inside, Zuko removed Sokka's arm from around him. "I can't believe that worked," he said, genuinely amazed.

"I can't believe that guy thought you were too good for me!" Sokka exclaimed, throwing up his arms indignantly.

Zuko ignored him. Now that they were inside, he needed to find a restroom to remove his disguise. There was no way he was apprehending their target dressed like a woman. The man was a member of his own nation's aristocracy, after all.

Locating the sign for the toilets across the room, Zuko began pushing through the crowd as politely as he could. He'd nearly made it when the weight of a hand appeared on his shoulder, halting him.

"So," a familiar, amused voice said behind him. "Zula, huh?"

Good eye widening, Zuko turned around. Blue eyes looked mirthfully at him from a sun-kissed face.

"Katara?" he uttered her name, surprised and confused in equal measures. She wasn't supposed to be here. This wasn't the plan. His eyes narrowed and in a low voice he hissed, "What are you doing here? This place is way too dangerous for you to be here alone!"

Katara rolled her eyes. "I'm not alone. You and Sokka are here," she pointed out. "Besides, you should've known that I wasn't going to just sit around and wait. I'm not a delicate flower." Her mouth split into a grin then and she added, "Anyway, it was totally worth the danger to see this." She gestured at his outfit and makeup.

Zuko's cheeks turned scarlet in embarrassment. To think that Katara of all people would see him wearing fake boobs. It was almost more humiliating than being recognized by the governor.

Katara took pity on him by looping her arm through his and leading him to the toilet again. "Come on. I'll help you get all that makeup washed off."

Zuko allowed her to guide him along. As embarrassed as he was, he was grateful for her offer of assistance. "…Thanks."

Katara nodded. Looking up at him again, she appeared to study him for a moment and then asked, "Who did your makeup anyway?"

Zuko hesitated briefly before saying, "Sokka."

Katara's eyebrows rose in surprise and then fell back down over her eyes. "Huh," she said without inflection. Then, after a beat, she added, "Looks good."

oO0Oo


Show of hands: who realized that this is a prequel to Day 1? It's a little subtle. (Or maybe it's not and everyone guessed it right away.) I thought it would be fun to offer some context for the incident that was alluded to in "Vigilantes" and Boogum requested a story that included crossdressing so I figured this would be a prime opportunity to deliver. It's not a long one but it's silly and I got to include my boy Sokka so I'm happy with it.