James huffed exasperatedly as he glared at Sirius, splayed out across one of the grand sofas in the common room. The pureblood smiled as women swarmed around him, arranging themselves carefully around his lithe frame. Several of the girls caressed whatever skin was within their reach, while the walking stick of testosterone that was Sirius Black lay in the center, every pore of his being screaming 'screw me'.

You'd think the whole Remus thing never even happened. James mused, snorting as one of the girls fell off her perch on Sirius' lap. She may as well have never even been there, as the group moved to claim the desirable space, rotating as one to improve their positions.

"Its disgusting, isn't it?" James heard a voice whisper next to him, as long legs obscured his view. James's eyes traced the curvaceous body in front of him, until his eyes finally reached a pair of almond shaped eyes framed by fire red hair. Lily smiled at him carefully, as one might approach a skittish pixie, placing her books on the table and sitting down next to him calmly. Opening up the top book and whipping out a quill, she began to take light notes in the margins, smiling internally as she saw James watching her, with jaw slack in shock, from the corner of her eye. "I don't see where the appeal is in draping your body all over him, sure, he's attractive, but his personality is - well, worse than yours." Lily stated, smiling at James wholeheartedly.

"Um, don't take this the wrong way, Lily, but... why are you sitting with me?" James mumbled, scraping a hand half way through his hair before he remembered a word of advice Remus had given, dropping the hand immediately to rest it on his leg.

"I don't know really. You just looked like you could use some company." Lily stated in reply, musing for a moment as James tried to draw his gaze away from the angel beside him. "Not to mention, in relation to casanova over there, you're virtually a saint." She smiled, resuming her note taking.

"So, I should keep Sirius around 24/7, then, to make me 'relatively' nicer?" James smirked, leaning over to read Lily's book. "Pigmy's only come out in winter, according to Remus. I don't think it says that in there." Lily smiled thankfully, scribbling the final note in the corner of the page quickly.

"I'm not sure if I'd put it like that. His influence rubs off on you." Lily answered, placing her quill back in her bag and turning to face James, glancing at her watch on the way. "Remus should be back from his rounds by now."

"Probably best he stays out, really." James replied swiftly, sparing a glance towards his best friend. "I barely want to witness that mess, I'd hate for Remus to have to see it. Hopefully he's caught some hufflepuffs doing the dirty, or something along those lines. That's sure to make him more than a little late, and give Sirius enough time to take one or two of his ladies somewhere far more private."

"Optimistic." Lily replied, wrinkling her nose lightly as the two turned to face the opening entrance, dread pooling in their stomachs. Sure enough, their wolfy friend emerged, smiling as he met their eyes. His smile froze as he spotted the virtual orgy in the corner, faltering for a moment until it returned, hollow.

Sirius froze as he spotted his lycan friend, eyes connecting for a matter of seconds as the werewolf broke his stride. A deep breath later, the walk resumed, ashy head dropping as he made his way up towards the dormitory. The Black heir stayed frozen, stilled by the golden orbs that had drilled scars on his retinas. James and Lily watched for a moment as the girls continued to gyrate around Sirius, while he remained stationary in the middle of the mess. Soon enough, he threw them off, ignoring the cries of indignation as he stalked out of the common room angrily, heading outside to blow off some steam.

"I've said it before and I'll say it again, my friends are idiots." James huffed, earning himself a pat on the shoulder from Lily before she retired to her own dormitory.


"So, does someone fancy explaining to me what the bloody nora is going on?" Peter burst into the dormitory, startling James and Remus as they sat playing chess on James' bed. "Its 5.15, designated "Padfoot&Moony do whatever the hell it is Padfoot&Moony do" time, yet you're up here, with James, and Padfoot is god knows where doing god knows what with a male-female-whatever. In fact, I can't remember the last time you actually had a Padfoot&Moony time, you've both been avoiding each other like the plague recently. I know I'm not the fastest wand in the crate, but even I can see that something's happened, and its big, and you're all excluding me. I want to - nay, demand to - know what is going on." Peter stated, growing redder by the moment. "Did you have a problem with Sirius' camp-ness or something? Or has he seduced one of your crushes? Or was that mouse he ate the other day in canine form your pet? Because I swear to Merlin, if you two don't make up soon, I'm going to actually lose my mind." Peter huffed, throwing his arms in the air exasperatedly.

"Nothing's going on, Peter. Knight to H5." Remus stated, as James snorted alongside him.

"Right. Nothing. Lets just pretend that nothing ever happened, yes?" James scoffed, rolling his eyes as he examined the chess board. "King to B7."

"SEE! This is what I mean! You can't just 'pretend' that everything is normal with whatever is going on, as it is clear as day that its not just normal! Look at yourself, Remus, you look like death warmed up, and Sirius isn't faring much better. And James, how can you just let this go on! You're letting them tear apart the marauders!" Peter exclaimed angrily, arms flailing desperately.

"Me? ME!?" James growled, standing up to face the fourth marauder. "Don't try and palm this off on me, 'Tail. What happened was between Remus and Sirius, it has nothing to do with me."

"It has everything to do with you, James. And me. Don't you see, the marauders isn't just based on my friendship with you, or your friendship with Sirius, or my friendship with Remus. All of us need to be friends for this to work! We don't spend any time as a foursome anymore, its always you and Sirius, plus Me and Remus, or you and Remus plus me and Sirius.

"Pawn to A7." Remus stated quietly.

"And you, Remus Lupin! You're at the heart of all this, you should be doing whatever necessary to fix whatever mess you've created. I don't know what on earth has happened, mainly as you wont tell me, but what I do know is it is doubtless smaller than some of the arguments you two have overcome, yes? Don't make me say which one I mean, I think we all know." Peter stated loudly, gesturing towards the slim teen.

"Don't attack Remus over this, Pete." James stepped in, placing his body in between the pair quickly and pushing Peter onto his own bed, before retaking his position next to the chessboard. "King to B6."

"Okay, fine, leave me out of the loop. I get the impression I don't want to be in the middle of this fucking argument anyway. But for gods sake, you three are the first and only friends I have, and I know you're in a similar position, Remus. How can you let something which is most likely fickle get in the way of that? We're meant to be together as one, not letting little things tear us apart. We're meant to suffer together, celebrate together, love together - albeit with other people. Please, don't let whatever crap Sirius Black has done to you affect your better judgment. You need to go gung ho on him and act, its the only way this mess is ever going to be fixed." Peter finished, gathering his belongings and stalking out of the room rapidly.

"He's right you know." James muttered, looking at Remus complacently. "You need to act, one way or another, because Sirius has gone and got himself stuck in a mental rut. He's not going to do anything either way, and its tearing him up inside."

"Knight to D4." Remus muttered, watching as one of James' pawns was destroyed violently.

"He's an idiot, I know that. And yes, he should be fighting for your heart. But he's lost, and you're meant to be the one that helps him find his way again, I know it!" James exclaimed, resting his elbows on his knees to examine the chessboard. "You just need some help finding your own way, that's all. Come on, Rem, you can see as well as I can that you're perfect for one another. Everything you two do together screams soul mates. And I don't know why it took us all so long to see it. I know you're going to try and write that first kiss off as down to the wolf, and hell, maybe it was the wolf that initiated it. But I'll be damned if you didn't enjoy it on some level, and I know for a fact that Sirius did. Yet you're both stubborn as mules and won't take the jump and just do something!" He exclaimed, looking at the chess board frustratedly. "Bishop to H6."

"What am I meant to do, James? Beg? Let him trample on my insides until he becomes bored and moves onto a new man, woman or mythical creature?" Remus stated, pushing up off the bed and turning away. "Queen to B5. Checkmate."


"Well well well, if it isn't Sirius Black." Severus Snape sneered, obstructing the Black child as he swooped through the otherwise empty corridor, frosty with the late november winds. "I've been hearing some, shall we say, interesting, information about you recently."

"Leave well enough alone, Snivelly." Sirius growled, teeth baring as he squared up to the boy in front of him, eager to get to the common room. Noting the Slitherin's tense position, he fingered his wand lightly in his pocket, ready to pounce if need be.

"Well, I would, but I'm afraid I have some public service to attend to." Snape replied curtly, nose inches away from his enemy as his black eyes bore into the grey in front of him. The dim candles which rested round the corridor dulled pulsingly, intimidated by the terse air surrounding the conflicting pair. "Concerning your choice in partners, primarily." Sirius' heart froze momentarily, ice seeping through his veins as Snape's smirk grew, spreading to cover his cheeks and leaving him with a manic, disjointed look. Closest he'll ever come to a smile, I suppose. Sirius mused, own jaw tensing in annoyance and slight fear. "Was dominating women no longer enough for you? I assume you and your grooming regime play the female role in your... well, they're hardly relationships, but calling it a tryst seems inappropriate..." Snape argued, lips pursing in contemplation.

"How?" Sirius ground out, lip curling in distaste as Snape emitted a huff of noise that Sirius supposed was a laugh.

"You should be careful where you disgrace yourself, Black. You forget its not only you and Potter that traipse round the corridors at night." Severus revealed, barely flinching as Sirius growled. "You're lucky that the petrified boy only sought out my consolations, as opposed to that of his father. I say 'his father', but I suppose he is your father too, no matter how hard poor Orion tries to forget it."

Sirius cursed under his breath as he realised the implications of what Snape said. He closed his eyes for a moment, taking a second to collect his thoughts before he re-opened them to look at Snape once more. Spotting the wand sashaying from the slitherin's pocket, Sirius sprang to action, slightly too late.

"Expe-"

"Petrificus Totalus!" Snape's voice barked, freezing Sirius' body in place. "Now, this is much better. No more of your interruptions, I don't know why you aren't made stationary more often. Salazar knows some people must be tempted to just Petrify you and leave you in closets." Sirius glared angrily at snape, swear words bursting in his mind like bombs as he tried to form a plan of escape.

Snape circled Sirius menacingly, eyes crawling across Sirius' body as he considered the teen in front of him. "At first glance you don't look very gay. Effeminate, yes, but I see no spandex, no bright colours, no hair gel. Yet your grooming regime should have given you away, I believe. You must wax and preen and brush like nobody's business, hmm?"

No, you fat lump of shit, some of us just know how to use a bar of soap and a hairbrush. Sirius huffed internally, rolling his eyes at the boy in front of him. And I'm not gay... I'm just not entirely straight. Slightly bent. Mildly homo-

"So, which one of your roommates is it that you're going to rape, hmm?" Sirius' mind blanked as Snape laughed once more, taunting the petrified boy. "I'd assume that you wouldn't sink as low as to try it on with Pettigrew, you're a Black, you must have some standards. Now, most would think Potter was the most likely, but that seems far too obvious and predictable for you. Besides, I'm sure if you wanted a run of the mill male like Potter, you could look outside your little 'gang', couldn't you? However, the wolf... well, that would be just perfect for you, wouldn't it? Having the beast as a little fucktoy? Is that why you keep him around, he's far too under the thumb to try and stop you, poor little werewolf." Snape hissed, nose to nose with Sirius.

"That's enough, Snape." A voice from behind Sirius stated coldly, as Sirius tried to see a face to identify the recognisable tones. Sure enough, when a mob of red hair evaded his vision, he internally raised his eyebrows, amused by the scene unfolding in front of him.

"Evans." Snape breathed lightly, lips upturning in the beginnings of a genuine smile. "I was just having a little chat with Mr -"

"Don't even try it, Severus. What on earth possessed you into thinking confronting Sirius Black about his sexuality was a remotely good idea, regardless of whether or not you could beat him? I can't believe you'd even consider trying something like this - and you have the tenacity to wonder why they pick on you! Don't you think for one moment that I didn't hear your comments, Snape. Why the hell did you bring the other marauders into this argument anyway? This is Sirius' private business, and you have no right to interrogate him on such a matter."

"And how, after all we went through, can you begin to judge someone for who they fall in love with?" Lily finished quietly, forcing Sirius to strain in order to hear. Her hands dropping to her hips sadly, gaze never leaving the slitherin.. "Go, Severus. Your presence here is not helping anyone."

Snape turned on his heel rapidly, shoulders slumped as he receded into the darkness. Lily looked at Sirius with a small smile, hands remaining on her hips. "Right old mess you've got yourself into here, Black." She grinned, moving towards him as she searched for her wand. "Finite Incantatem." Lily said calmly, waving her wand in the direction of Sirius offhandedly. He stumbled slightly, grabbing onto the redhead for temporary support, but when he didn't let go Lily looked over, confused.

"Listen, Lily, the whole thing about the wolf-"

"Don't fret, Sirius, I've known about Remus for a while." She smiled, patting him on the shoulder gently. "I've known him for 6 years too, you know. Its not like you and presumably Potter would be the only two to figure it out."

"Me and James didn't really figure it out." Sirius mumbled, smiling shyly. "Pete was the one that put two and two together and got the book out of the library to show us. We just confirmed it."

"Well. Maybe he's capable of more than I give him credit for." Lily smiled, pocketing her wand once more and heading for the common room. "I'm surprised Severus was surprised about your bisexuality."

"Oh?" Sirius questioned, smiling lightly at the short women walking alongside him. "You had it all worked out then, that I was batting for the other team?"

"Not worked out, no, but after seeing you attempt to romance the great squid, nothing can surprise me about you anymore, Sirius Black." Lily laughed lightly, looking at the boy beside her momentarily. "I suppose now is the wrong time to bring up that I saw you eyeing up Remus in Transfig?" She asked lightly, hoping for something resembling a coherent answer.

"Yes, yes it is." Sirius smirked, turning towards the kitchens as Lily smiled lightly, continuing her journey towards the common room.


heylo! Reviewers, I love you. 17 of you, down from the highs of chapter 10 (26 reviewers, golly gosh) but enough for me to feel very loved :)

I've written another little tidbit, called Taste In Men. Its only going to have 5 chapters, so I should finish it pretty quickly (note the use of 'should' as opposed to 'will'...), but it is really really... shall we say, odd? Definitely not to everyone's tastes, but there shall be some RLSB in it, so if you've got a second, pop over and give it a go! :)

Song of the week - Substitutiary Locomotion