This is the point in the story where y'all are going to start hating me, but know that Jane wrote it first. If it were up to me, the guys would have made sweet love on the beach in the last chapter, but I trust Jane, and so should you.

- Six -

Logan stood patiently in line at Starbucks, thankful that the modern world had adapted to those who were forced to wait for hours to receive a prognosis. He'd volunteered to be the first to get coffee, hoping to escape the emotional turmoil that was going on upstairs.

Lucy was fine, in the strictest sense of the word. She was alive, but she'd suffered slight brain trauma, and was still unconscious. The doctors were hopeful, but Logan knew from their body language that they had no way of knowing what would happen when she woke up.

Maria was harping on what they were all thinking but had the decency not to say, "Stupid girl. She shouldn't have even been out there with you guys. She never listens, I tell you…"

Charlie had eventually chewed her out, the most concerned of all of them. After all, Lucy was his sister, and he hadn't notified their parents yet, which put him in charge of the situation. He'd already come to Logan a few times for his opinion, both as a friend and the closest thing they had to a medical expert.

The discussion had turned to what was next. The doctors told them that she'd have to stay in the hospital for at least a week, and that was once she woke up. In the meantime, her parents had to be notified, and somebody had to go home and take care of the boys so they could make the journey to San Francisco.

The Harpers and Carlos had immediately insisted that they stay with them as long as necessary and Carlos had never left the family, insisting on running back and forth to the beach house for whatever was needed. Kendall stayed around as well, and Logan could tell they were both feeling secondhand guilt for not doing more to stop her.

Logan had insisted the whole way to the hospital, as they followed the ambulance, that none of them could have stopped her. Kendall, in particular, had pulled her out of the water and yet still blamed himself for not doing more. Ever since, he and Carlos had been whispering to each other, and Logan was curious as to what they could be saying.

As he was about to reach the counter, an attractive blonde blustered in like a tumbleweed, and accidently cut in front of him, not noticing he was already in line. As she opened her mouth to give her order, she finally noticed he was there, and apologized profusely before attempting to take her proper place behind Logan. He looked at her curiously, before insisting she go ahead of him, and helping her decision by telling her that he had a large order. She thanked him, and he watched her as she gave her order.

It wasn't attraction that made him stare per-se, but he felt a faint recognition for her almost unnatural green eyes, and dimpled chin. He knew, deep down, that he knew her, but there was no recognition from her part, though he did catch her looking him up and down as she waited for her coffee.

After putting in his order, he stood next to her at the end of the counter as they both waited for their coffee. She thanked him once again, and he smiled trying his best to figure out where he knew her from.

"Elliot?" the barista called out, and the blonde jumped, reaching for her coffee. Logan smiled, recalling the only female Elliot he'd ever met in his life, and opened his mouth to reintroduce himself, but before he could she darted off again, just as fast as she'd came in.

Elliot Williams was the daughter of Oscar Williams, a former coworker of his dads. He and Ella, as he used to call her, had been good friends when they were growing up, before his dad died and his mom moved them out to L.A. He hadn't seen her in at least twenty years, but he had no doubt that the pixie-like blonde that had cut in line was Ella Williams.

He grinned on the way back to the waiting room, before remembering why they were there and sobering himself. He was almost back to the room, coming down the long white hallway, before he saw Kendall and Carlos deep in conversation. He knew it was wrong, but he couldn't help but adjust his ears to hear what they were saying.

"Listen, when she wakes up, tell her it was you that pulled her out of the water," Kendall said, and Logan almost stopped where he stood. He continued to listen, turning a corner so they couldn't see him from where they stood.

He could tell Carlos was hesitant, "But it's you she wants Ken. I don't understand why you're pushing her off on me now after spending all week flirting with her."

"I'm telling you! I was not flirting with her, I was being nice! I don't like her like that, and you do," Kendall insisted. "The last thing I need is her coming out of a coma feeling like she owes me something, when I never meant anything by her. I can tell you like her, why are you fighting this?"

"Because she's in a coma Kendall, and we're discussing how I'm going to get in her pants. That's not right, and you know it," Carlos said, concern and anger evident in his voice.

Kendall continued to argue, "See, you care about her. And she'll lose interest in me once I'm gone. I'm taking Maria back to Los Angeles tonight, and after that I need to know that you will at least try with her."

"Why?" Carlos asked, standing his ground. Logan peeked around the corner and saw the stubborn look on his face as he stared Kendall down.

Kendall leaned down and held onto his shoulders, "Because you need this. I know you miss Roni, but you deserve to be happy. And Noah won't tell you that because he loved her too much, but you needed to hear it. Give it a chance, please."

Carlos opened his mouth to say something, before his eyes glanced over to see Logan peering around the corner, "Logan! We thought you'd gotten lost!"

He realized that it was the perfect explanation as to why he was coming down this hallway, and quickly lied, "I did. I guess I'm just directionally challenged."

Kendall turned, and his eyes danced with a memory (That's exactly why I bought a GPS…) before he addressed them both, "I guess you heard, but I'm driving back to Los Angeles tonight. I thought you could stay here to stay up to date on the medical stuff, and I could take Maria back to take care of the kids. I've already booked Matthew and Theresa on a flight tomorrow morning."

Logan nodded, and ushered them all back into the waiting room. Charlie and Maria were still in there, and she was trying her best to comfort him. Noah and Addison had gone home for a while, after they made Carlos promise to keep them updated. Kendall sat down next to Charlie, before going through his plan.

Charlie nodded, agreeing with everything, before Maria interrupted, "Why do I have to go home when Logan is staying here? I'm her sister, and I need to be here when she wakes up. Logan's good with the boys. Once she's awake I'll take over."

The others tried to argue, but Logan had found a way out of this stressful situation, and he was willing to take it. He talked his friends down, and insisted that everything would be fine. He knew how to handle the kids, and even with his background as an EMT, in this situation his was as useless as the rest of them.

Kendall turned to look at him, and Logan knew immediately that he wasn't looking forward to another six hour drive with him. Though they'd worked a lot of their tension out, it was always when they were surrounded with other people. When they were alone, the silence was palpable and the guilt weighed down whatever conversation they tried to have. It would only get worse now that Kendall felt his own guilt for what happened to Lucy.

They stayed until the doctor came to tell them that she would have to have surgery the next day, and that the odds were getting increasingly better. Still, there was nothing left to be done that day, and Kendall ushered Logan and Carlos away, leaving Charlie and Maria to see her during the short allowance of visiting hours they were given. She was still unconscious, but they all knew that Charlie would be better off if he felt he was doing something.

Carlos drove them back to the beach house in his car because in the rush to get to the hospital Kendall's was still in the driveway. It took them less than two hours to finish packing, and Kendall reminded him that Maria would be coming home soon and could grab anything they'd forgotten.

He was a different person today, and as he packed the car Carlos and Logan both looked after him with concern. His every nerve showed frustration, and though they all felt some guilt for not stopping her, Kendall was the only one who thought he was to blame. Everyone else saw him as the hero he was.

Logan spoke to Carlos in hushed tones as Kendall darted back and forth from the house to the car, "I'm not going to pretend I didn't hear what you guys were saying in the hallway. As subtle as he was being, Kendall is right. Take care of her, and things will work themselves out."

Carlos looked a little shocked by the insinuation, but didn't try to object, "I should probably give you similar advice. I've never seen Kendall so worked up. Well, there was the time…" he looked directly at Logan, and the brunet had no doubt that Carlos had worked it out. "Just talk to him. If he'll listen to anyone, it will be you."

"I'm not so sure about that," Logan said, shaking his head as he watched Kendall load the last of the bags into his trunk.

Carlos put a hand on his shoulder, forcing the taller man to look at him, "Trust me."

Logan wanted to argue, to tell his friend exactly why Kendall had no reason to listen to him, or talk to him, or look at him ever again, and how the fact they could even be in each other's presence now was a blessing because he didn't deserve it. He wanted to tell him how many regrets he had, and how deep down he knew he'd never find love because he'd had it and he'd thrown it away. Logan knew he could tell Carlos everything. But Kendall was walking in the door, intent on leaving as soon as possible, and all he could do was nod.

Carlos walked them out to the car, and Logan considered begging him to join them, but knew that he wouldn't leave Lucy now. Instead, he climbed in on the passenger side as Kendall said goodbye, no doubt telling Carlos to keep him up to date if anything changed. They hugged, and as Kendall got in the car, Logan caught a set of brown eyes staring at him hopefully, though he knew Carlos shouldn't have his hopes up.

He realized he was leaning toward the door and away from the man next to him, but whatever progress they'd made up until the accident had been thrown off, and he knew that Kendall blamed the distraction of having him nearby for his inability to do more for Lucy. When he thought of it that way, even Logan had a hard time not blaming them for her injuries.

After driving for ten minutes, pulling out into what happened to be rush hour traffic, he cleared his throat, knowing that awkward conversation had to be better than awkward silence, and Kendall glanced at him before staring back at the road.

"Apart from…I hope your experience in San Fran was worthwhile," he started, before glancing at the man in his passenger seat. Logan couldn't help but smile. Apart from the obvious downside to their trip, the whole week had been perfect. For a minute there, he'd even thought that…

But Kendall's eyes were cold and cordial. He was too busy thinking of Lucy to give him a second thought, and not for the first time, he couldn't help but be a little jealous of the way she took his attention.

"I still can't believe you introduced me to Dobler," he added, hoping that it would trigger a worthwhile conversation, and maybe some warmer feelings. "How did you even remember that I liked them?"

"I remember a lot of things," he answered quietly, before realizing the road he was leading them down and changing his path. "Like the fact you introduced me to their music in the first place. I guess we're even now."

Logan knew he was talking about the music, but he wondered just how even they were. Was it possible that Kendall had finally forgiven him for his misgivings all those years ago? Maybe he had seen the way he'd spent all that time regretting his decision, and was willing to give it another shot? Maybe, but he was much too afraid to ask.

Kendall turned up the stereo, one of his expertly crafted playlists, before he noticed that Logan was beginning to nod off already. He smirked a little, before adding quietly, "Why don't you sleep for a while? That way if I get tired we can switch off."

Given a reason, Logan nodded, before leaning his head against the passenger window and quickly falling asleep. He dreamed easily of a happier time in his life, driving through the night with Kendall by his side, and it was evident on his face as a smile emerged even in his unconscious state. Looking over at him, even Kendall grinned, remembering a similar memory.

He woke up a few hours later, now surrounded by the darkness of a California night. As he noticed Logan stir, Kendall pulled into a service station, asking the older man if he needed anything. Logan shook his head, but sat up to prove that he was awake.

While Kendall was inside, he couldn't help but look around, curious as to his surroundings. Opening the glove box, he remembered a time when Kendall kept their playlist on a CD in a much less expensive car. Instead he found the usual fast food napkins and road maps. A little disappointed, his eyes wandered over to the iPod that was plugged into the stereo system.

Looking up to be sure that he wasn't going to be caught, he quickly searched Kendall's long list of playlists, before he found what he was looking for. Though most of the categories had clever names, there was one labeled "LM" that spiked his suspicions. He felt a tear come to his eyes when just there at the top of the playlist was their song, a worn classic about young love. Scanning the rest of the songs, burning them into his memory so he could recreate the playlist for himself, he realized that as little as he'd deserved Kendall's thoughts, he'd had them the whole time they'd been apart.

He quickly put the device to sleep as Kendall approached the car, and put himself together just enough to function as the man filled up the driver's seat. Remembering what Kendall had mentioned before he fell asleep, he offered to take over driving duties.

Kendall shook his head, "But you should start talking to keep me awake. The last thing I want to do is doze off and hurt someone else."

The mood took a nosedive, and Logan remembered the promise he'd made to Carlos before they left San Francisco. He decided that it was time for them to talk, with two hours left until they made it home.

"You can't still be blaming yourself for what happened?" he started, knowing that his wording meant nothing with Kendall. He could layer bullshit onto his questions, but he was so perceptive that it wouldn't do any good.

For a moment it seemed that Kendall would ignore his question, but then he said grimly, "So you're saying that if I had made it to her soon her it wouldn't have made a difference?"

"And if you hadn't made it at all, she'd be dead," he reminded him. "And she's not. She's already recovering, and that's thanks to your quick thinking."

"It wasn't quick thinking, it was a reflex. You saw me on the beach, my brain had nothing to do with it," he said, insistent on his own guilt.

Logan looked over at him, staring at the way his jaw tensed with his own stubbornness, "Because I use my head, and you use your heart. And thanks to us, she's alive. You're a hero Ken, and I'm tired of hearing otherwise."

"I can't help but feel that I could have done something more, and there's nothing that can change that," he said, sounding sadder now, but still steadfast.

"Okay, listen. Guilt can eat you alive. It will send you to bed sobbing, and it will break to your heart until your chest physically hurts. And even when you learn to live with it, you still feel sore. So I'm not going to let any friend of mine go through that, especially when they are blameless. Maybe there's a reason for all this that we don't know. But whatever it is, it's not your fault. So shut the fuck up, for god's sake," Logan insisted, his quiet demeanor folding to his intensity, very nearly scaring the other man as he raised his voice to drive his point home.

Kendall was stunned into silence, knowing just what Logan was speaking of, and unable to form words that would make Logan feel better, though he knew that six years of guilt were not so easily lifted.

Now calmer in the silence, Logan started on a lighter note, "Maybe this is just god's way of throwing Carlos and Lucy together. He really likes her."

Kendall nodded, "I haven't seen him like this since…I haven't seen him like this in a while. And she could use a guy like him, somebody who's willing to give her so much attention."

"You didn't seem to mind," Logan added, a bitchy streak appearing in their calm conversation.

The driver rolled his eyes before he could stop himself, "She was insistent. But we're not going to talk about this when she's unconscious in a hospital bed."

Logan couldn't argue with his point, and clammed up, changing the topic to the past, listening to Kendall recount tales of his now familiar friends and he smiled at the way the musician lit up when he spoke of them. After a few very funny anecdotes, they were soon pulling into the driveway that belonged to the older Groves.

Finally faced with the prospect of notifying the parents of their daughter's condition, Logan turned to Kendall for support. He got out of the car first, and Logan followed, as they both marched up to the door. It was late, much too late to be ringing the doorbell, but they had no choice under the circumstances.

Mr. Groves answered, confusion on his face, as he let the men in. Logan explained their circumstances, along with Lucy's condition, before Kendall took over, explaining that he'd drive them to the airport as soon as they were ready, and that he'd already booked their flight.

After much discussion, the men left the Groves to get their things together, as they carried a sleeping CJ and Ethan back to their parents' house, where Logan would be in charge of them for a few days. He had no problem taking care of the boys, though Kendall asked to be sure before he left.

Pausing in the doorway before heading back to take the Groves to the airport, Kendall hesitated before telling Logan something he'd held off as long as he could, "Listen, Logan, I was going to mention it after the trip, but…things have obviously changed. I'm going on a promotional tour in Asia, and I'm going to be gone for a while. I just thought I'd say goodbye."

Unable to assemble his thoughts, Logan added, "If you get any news from San Francisco, be sure to let me know."

The taller man nodded, ignoring his aversion to goodbyes. Logan was glad that it wasn't mentioned, because after all this time, he still didn't like saying goodbye to Kendall.


Logan slept in the next morning, though he woke up early to a text message from Carlos, telling him that Lucy had woken up and was improving quickly. A few minutes later, he received a more surprising call, from Kendall, who wanted to make sure that he'd gotten the news. The pause at the end signaled that he didn't want to hang up, but with nothing else to say, Kendall made his apologies and repeated his goodbye from the night before, before the line went dead.

After that, Logan had a hard time falling back asleep.