(A/N and Disclaimer: I own nothing. Kingdom of Paradise and all the characters are the property of Climax Entertainment and Sony Computer Entertainment, not me. Also, despite having completed the game no fewer than eight times before some idiot deleted it from my PSP, I didn't see most of the cutscenes - such as the whole explanation of the Toshintetsu, and the final cutscene - until yesterday due to a glitch in my copy of the game, because somebody's been kind enough to supply a video walkthrough. And the scene in which the Kirin invade Hakuzen got me thinking about Jok Xiu and Ginritsu, and the nature of their relationship... once a slash fan, always a slash fan - in my case at least. And that's how this fanfic came to be. So, it's non-explicit femmeslash, Jok Xiu/ Ginritsu; with probable spoilers from the invasion of Western Byakko onwards - it's just my idea of what could have happened, between the events at Hakuzen and Shinbu finding Yen Lan again, grievously injured, on Gensei Island. And it's dedicated to Daina - I know it's not Zabby (heck, it's not even NCIS!), but you're the one who's been on at me to write something. Just be glad I was inspired.
So, here goes nothing... Feedback, as always, is much appreciated. Apologies in advance if it sucks beyond belief)
She is in pain. That's all she knows for sure. Her mouth aches due to the metal bar forced between her teeth, and the wire around her head holding it in place cuts into her scalp every time she turns from the neck. Everything from her shoulder blades to her hands aches from the strain of being held up and tugged along by her bound wrists, and the muscles in her neck are screaming in protest with each tiny movement, sore from holding her head up in this awkward position. The once-pristine skirt she wears is covered in dirt from the knees down, along with a few spots of blood soaking through from her knees; scraped and cut when her gown snagged on twigs, leaving her legs exposed as Genra dragged her along the ground when her legs buckled and refused to carry her further. And her head is pounding, the incessant throbbing building inside her skull to the point that Ginritsu - resilient though she is - wants to whimper aloud.
Then again, she only has herself to blame for her headache. Sobbing all the way from Western Byakko to Kirin would do that to a person; and yet she still feels she has more tears to shed. She could cry for a year and still barely begin to express her anguish at what she has seen happen.
Jok Xiu - her beloved Jok Xiu - is dead. Stabbed to death before she had the time to fully atone for her mistakes. Murdered before she could achieve her full potential as Clan Lord. Killed before she and Ginritsu could be together once more. As these torturous thoughts of what they might have, could have, should have had resurface, the tears begin again, sobs rising in her throat as if to choke her.
Eyes closed in an effort to stem the flow of her tears, which fall thick and fast in a way Ginritsu never before knew they could, she is taken entirely by surprise when the hand supporting her by her bound wrists suddenly opens, releasing her and sending her sprawling to the ground. She has the sense to turn her head to the side in the split-second's notice she has, to prevent her nose smashing against the ground; but her head still hits the stone with enough force to make coloured lights explode behind her eyelids, and the force at which her torso slams into the unyielding ground still knocks the breath out of her. Her throat raw from her tears, she struggles to raise her head. She feels a jab at her side, the cold metal of a sword prodding into the flesh of her waist.
"Get up." Genra's voice is harsh, cold; nothing like the wheedling tone he usually employs to address her. She supposes that that vanished when she rejected him once and for all not one day ago. What had she called him? A low-life, barbaric fool? At the memory, the golden-haired young woman feels like laughing; although she now knows that, well-deserved as the insult was, she is almost certainly to die for it.
As she struggles to raise herself from the floor, teeth clamping down on the metal between them as she tries to pull her legs underneath her to kneel; she thinks back to the events in Byakko. It strikes her as ironic that the dying woman was the only one who hadn't screamed. Sui Lin's howl of remorse as she came to her senses to find herself clutching the bloodied weapon had drowned her own muffled wail of grief as their screams echoed off the walls of every building in Byakko. But the lavender-haired girl - because really, Ginritsu thinks, that was all she was at sixteen years old; Clan Lord or otherwise - had collapsed to the floor with little more than a few whispered words of shock at her sudden end. She wishes with all her heart that she could have been near enough to hear what Jok Xiu had said; to put words to the few final movements of her lips that she watched, stricken, from the floor near Genra.
Wondering what her darling Jok Xiu's last words were will torment her for the rest of her life. However, she reminds herself; as she finally tucks her legs underneath her; that probably won't be long. The other generals are aware of her treachery now. Genra's previous infatuation with her won't keep her safe. There is only one punishment for betrayal in Central Kirin. Drained, she slumps forward, her forehead resting on the ground; longing for the feel of Jok Xiu's lips brushing her brow in a gentle kiss, instead of the coarse stone against her skin. Perhaps if I wish for it hard enough...
Her tears have stopped now. She doesn't even have the energy to cry anymore.
Faint vibrations through the ground, coupled the tapping of heels, alert her to Yen Lan's arrival. Her steps seem unsteady, and she hears the footsteps cease all together after a few moments, presumably when the other female notices she and Genra there.
"Yen Lan!" she hears him greet her; his loud, arrogant voice taking on a jovial tone she has heard before, when the sorry excuse for a man wishes to taunt a victim. "Look what I dragged back here from Byakko".
Typical Genra - showcasing his own achievement in hauling her back. Ginritsu feels the tip of his sword at the nape of her neck, but she doesn't move. She feels exhausted all of a sudden - and what's the use in drawing things out, since he surely means to kill her eventually? If now is the time, then so be it. However, she hears a sharp intake of breath from what she assumes in Yen Lan's direction, then more footsteps; quicker now than before. Suddenly, she feels the cold metal pushed from her neck - the blade scores a shallow scratch in her skin, but she ignores the sting; a minor irritation in comparison to the collection of aches the rest of her body has been reduced to - and feels her head lifted by a firm, unmistakeably female hand. As Yen Lan gently tilts her head up to look at her, she remembers Jok Xiu's hands - the cool, thin fingers interlacing with her own or stroking over her own tingling skin - and a few more tears escape her, clinging to her lashes before tumbling down her cheeks, and over Yen Lan's thumb as it gently brushes her cheek. The orange-clad woman's eyes narrow.
"Release her!" she commands, looking to Genra. Ginritsu feels rather than sees the man behind her scoff.
"Yen Lan, do you know what she did? She's a traitor-"
"Release her, Genra," Yen Lan orders again, her tone icy.
Genra tuts, as if pressing his sword against the rope binding her takes a momentous effort. "Showing mercy to a bitch like her... you must be turning soft, Yen Lan. Or are you on her side?"
His voice takes on a dangerous note as he poses the question, but it's one that the darker-haired female elects to ignore. As Genra presses her sword down to slice through the rope at her wrists, Yen Lan reaches behind her and twists deftly at the wire securing the metal between Ginritsu's teeth. She remains unresponsive as she is finally freed, save for rotating her jaw a few times, her arms hanging limply at her sides once the rope falls away from her wrists as her knuckles scrape the ground. Yen Lan's hands are at her shoulders again, turning her; helping her into a sitting position as she lifts her forearms to examining the skin rubbed raw by the cords that had held them together.
"Enough, Yen Lan," Genra says. Looking up at him as he speaks, Ginritsu is torn between wanting to fly at him in a rage and wanting to run. As she sits on the ground before him, Yen Lan kneeling behind her, his bulk casts a shadow onto the pair of them, and his leer makes her shiver with foreboding. Suddenly, he seems threatening rather than idiotic; and for the first time, Ginritsu is afraid of him.
At least, she thinks to herself, Jok Xiu's death was quick. She hadn't heard Sui Lin coming up behind her - Ginritsu knew it from the way the other woman's eyes had widened in shock, as she looked down to match the sickening sound of metal ripping through flesh to the sword skewering her own body. She hadn't died in fear. That is some comfort, albeit a meagre one.
She hadn't realised that she was shaking, trembling in shock as the events of the day caught up with her. Perhaps she is imagining it, but the blue-eyed General is sure she feels Yen Lan's hand tighten briefly on her shoulder.
"Spare her, Genra," the other female says; her tone almost... pleading? Ginritsu cannot believe it. She'd never heard, nor expected to hear, Yen Lan begging for anything - least of all from Genra, and to save Ginritsu's skin. "There's been so much death - so many lives lost needlessly. Why kill her too?"
Genra's eyes widen in disbelief. "She leaked Central Kirin's secrets to the Byakko! Death is almost too good for her!"
"She was helping Lord Jok Xiu out of love," comes Yen Lan's reply, her voice shaking slightly - from anger or from some other emotion, Ginritsu cannot tell. "Are you really going to kill her out of bitterness that her love for Jok Xiu wasn't given to you instead?"
As she listens to Yen Lan, Ginritsu realises, her stomach turning over, what fate must have befallen the twins. She had known all along that Lu Yan and Li Yin would be needed to open the Kirin Gate, but she hadn't understood before that their lives would be lost to achieve this. A sideways glance to Yen Lan, wincing as she moves her stiff neck, tells her immediately that she had been equally oblivious. The confident, merciless demeanour of a Kirin General has vanished; and the other woman's grey eyes are wide and imploring, like those of a frightened young girl - she appears to be as sickened by the needless death of the two women as Ginritsu feels. She had long suspected that Yen Lan's loyalty to the clan, and assurance that the chaos they were causing really was for the good of Ouka, were weakening - had considered, at times, confessing her duplicity to the other woman in the hope of finding an ally with whom to break free of this twisted scheme, perhaps fleeing with her and hiding away until the Kirin's hunt for the runaway Generals had ended and they could begin their lives as honest women once more - and she sees now, beyond all doubt, that Yen Lan wants no further part in this. The tension she sees in Genra's angular jaw, and the rage in his cold eyes, tell her that Yen Lan's previous below-the-belt remark makes her chance of getting off Gensei Island alive almost as slim as Ginritsu's.
"Yen Lan," Genra answers; his voice low and dangerous. "Put her down, and stand aside." His hand is already at the pommel of his weapon; stubby fingers stroking the Genbu sword like a beloved pet. She feels Yen Lan tense beside her, and wonders if she will deign to follow his order - but she stays still and stubborn. Ginritsu is caught between gladness for the comfort and admiration of the other woman's refusal to yield to this tyrant, and frustration at Yen Lan's audacity. Haven't enough lives been lost today without her putting herself blithely at the mercy of fool Genra and his sword?
Death. Knowing as she does that, without a miracle, Genra won't let her leave this encounter alive; she falls to wondering how to handle this - the end of her life. Eighteen years suddenly feels simultaneously long and short to her. All the questions she never expected to ask herself - not that she ever found herself expecting to anticipate her own death, having held onto the preferable idea of slipping away during a peaceful sleep and feeling no pain even after she became a Kirin Divine General - flood her mind as Genra slowly unsheathes his sword, a look of warning to Yen Lan etched into his features as if giving her one last chance to see that he is deadly serious - in the literal sense of the word. Will it hurt? Undoubtedly, she thinks, chastising herself mentally for wasting time thinking such an inane thing. Will it be quick? Knowing Genra, who likes to torment and toy with his victims, probably not. Will I try to run? Will Yen Lan defend me? She almost envies Jok Xiu, her death too sudden for the Clan Lord to spend her final precious moments pondering whether or not to make a last desperate bid for survival. Against her will, Ginritsu wonders what has become of Sui Lin. She'd noticed the girl's blank, staring eyes as she thrust the sword forward, and had seen the look of pure shock when she blinked and looked down to the bloodied weapon in her hands and the corpse at her feet - she knows the girl wasn't in her right mind, and is certain that Chi Disruption was behind it. Sui Lin's wail of remorse had told Ginritsu that she was truly sorry, and she cannot imagine what a horrible experience it must have been for her... but, if she was able, she'd still like to hunt the girl down and attack her without a hint of mercy; to relieve some of her all-consuming grief in a furious assault, fists pummelling flesh, nails scrabbling at clothes and skin, hair ripped from the Seiryu girl's scalp. Sui Lin gives her somebody to blame for Jok Xiu's death, something to channel her anger to, even if imagining her vengeance is all she can do.
Disjointed images of Jok Xiu fill her mind now. She had been so strong... Ginritsu had always known she would shine as a leader once she stopped relying on that damned Toshintetsu for answers. The fact that Jok Xiu had been prepared to sacrifice Ginritsu to safeguard it doesn't rankle at all with the disgraced General - she remembers the nod they had exchanged, too subtle a gesture for Genra to notice; a last moment of connection and understanding passing between them as she had silently agreed to Jok Xiu's decision. No matter how many mistakes she had made in the past, Ginritsu's heart swells with pride in the lavender-haired girl for that alone. The first, last and only decision she had made for herself as the Clan Lord had been the right one, at the last possible moment; and she only hopes that is how the disciples of Byakko will remember her - sword held high, sleeves billowing, crimson eyes blazing as she refused to back down to Genra; radiant with both the beauty of her youth and the poise, if not the wisdom, of the true Clan Lord that she had finally learned to be.
She had been strong in the moments before her death, Ginritsu thinks. A manner she should emulate now.
Genra, by this point, has taken a step towards them; sword poised to strike. "Out of my way, Yen Lan! This is your last chance to move! I'm warning you!"
She hears the rustle of cloth as Yen Lan stands - relief that the other woman is saving herself mingles with a sudden feeling of loss as her new-found ally seems to desert her - but the other woman remains just behind her; not moving her hand from Ginritsu's shoulder. She has stopped trembling, but she feels Yen Lan's hand shaking now. Gritting her teeth, she struggles to her feet; her grazed knees stinging - she ends up grabbing Yen Lan's hand to pull herself upright. However, soon a few cuts on her knees will be the least of her problems; and she blocks out the pain. By the time she has straightened herself up to her full height and steadied herself, the aches in her body have been pushed to the back of her mind. She stands beside Yen Lan now, both women regarding Genra with eyes narrowed.
Ginritsu's eyes are narrowed only to conceal her fear from Genra, but she hopes their show of hostility will unnerve him all the same. She may be about to die, but she's not about to give Genra the satisfaction of seeing her afraid.
The scrape of a sword against its scabbard tells her than Yen Lan's weapon is drawn, even before she sees it pointing at Genra. How pretty the Suzaku sword is, she thinks dreamily; watching as the tinted glass embellishing the hilt catches the light, as brilliant as the flame it mimics. What bizarre things you notice when you know that you're about to die.
Genra's lips twist into a sneer. "You don't stand a chance against me, Yen Lan; especially with little Ginritsu here to defend." His eyes glint as he looks to the Ginritsu, mocking her directly - but if he expects a reaction, he is to be sadly disappointed. "And unlike her, there's nobody waiting for you on the other side. Are you really that desperate to die, Yen Lan?"
To her credit, Yen Lan doesn't dignify his goading talk with an answer. As her free hand gropes for Ginritsu's, eventually finding it; she glances to her; not taking her eyes off Genra for long enough to allow him to take her by surprise.
"Ginritsu... I'm so sorry. I never knew it would turn out like this... Jok Xiu... the twins... it's too much..." Her grey eyes glimmer with tears. She'd never seen Yen Lan show an ounce of compassion before - the bloodshed of the day must have opened her eyes to the ruthlessness of all their actions. Gently, the yellow-haired female squeezes the hand she holds.
"It's going to be alright" she murmurs. And, strangely, she feels as calm as she sounds. She feels almost detached from herself; as if her soul is already separating from her body, even before her demise. It's too late now for rage, at Yen Lan or Sui Lin or anybody else. Yes, she is still frightened, but that fear is overridden by the realisation that, this way, she and Jok Xiu won't be parted for long. The reunion they have waited for isn't to happen in this life, but it is to happen - and soon. That knowledge calms her, allows her to meet Genra's irate, pop-eyed gaze with a faint smile; lets the young woman look upon the sword that will spell her end in a few short moments without recoiling or shuddering. She had imagined her last minutes being marred by animal instinct or bodily disgrace, seeing herself in her minds eye crying, begging for redemption, screaming, even vomiting in fear. Instead, she stares composedly at Genra, thinking of Jok Xiu and imagining their positions reversed back in Hakuzen. If she herself had been the one to die there, would her lover have admired Ginritsu for meeting her end with dignity? She decides that she would.
"I know you loved her," whispers Yen Lan.
"So did she," Ginritsu responds in an undertone. She hears the other woman let out a tiny gasp that might have been a sob - but when her gaze flickers sideways to glance at her, Yen Lan's cheeks are dry and her face set. Perhaps, had circumstances been different, they might have been closer - friends, instead of merely fellow generals. But Ginritsu is determined to die without regrets, and contents herself with knowing that, in these final few minutes - of her life, certainly, and perhaps the other woman's too - they have understood one another. And that is as much as they have time for.
With that, she releases Yen Lan's hand after one final squeeze - for reassurance, for forgiveness, to say farewell - as Genra shifts his bulk into a combat stance. How fickle he is, she thinks, to be set on killing the woman he had proclaimed to love - does the creature understand the difference between love and mating? Yen Lan holds her own sword steady as she raises her arms into a defensive position - the best she can manage without a weapon. But that doesn't matter. Nothing matters anymore.
As the tension in the atmosphere turns to danger, her lips quirk upwards into a smile as she looks at Genra; as she opens her mouth to clearly utter her last words, echoing the very same last words she heard Jok Xiu speak.
Jok Xiu? I'm coming. It won't be long now. Just wait. I am. And I'm not afraid anymore.
"Do your worst," she says simply; before closing her eyes for the last time.
(The last line is a horrendously hackneyed phrase; I know... any other opinions?)
