Chapter 5: Avoidance

Bella POV

When I woke up that morning, I made myself a solemn vow never to touch another drop of alcohol as long as I lived. Not only did I feel like I'd been run over by a train, but I could only remember fuzzy details of the night before. And my friends were certainly no help, since they were almost as bad off as I was. There was only one thing I did remember however.

Edward.

That part of the evening came rushing back to me when I checked my phone and saw that I had a new text message from him:

Bella, I'm about to board but I wanted to say bye first. I'm so sorry about last night, hope you'll forgive me. See you in a few weeks. –E

"Damn it!" I cursed out loud when I saw that the message had come in two hours previous which meant he was already long gone. Now I had to wait until he landed and called me.

If he called me.

The look on his face at the graduation and on the beach was something I never in a thousand years would have imagined coming from Edward; directed at me anyway. And even though he had apologized in the text, there was still no explanation as to what brought it on in the first place.

I waited for the remainder of that day and still… nothing from Edward. More days passed and I began to worry. He didn't answer my texts and all of my calls went to voicemail. Was he avoiding me? And if so, why? I intended to get my answers.

Alice and I had been invited over for the fourth of July at the Cullen's. If anyone would know what was going on with Edward, surely it would be his brother. So when we arrived, I immediately began hunting him down and eventually found him out back by the grill.

"Hey, Bella Bear! What's up, girl?" Emmett exclaimed as I approached him, pulling me into his warm embrace. I gave a small laugh as I hugged him back, suddenly reminded of how much I had missed him over the last few weeks. Alice had kept me so busy; I'd hardly had time to do much else besides sleep.

And of course, think of Edward.

As soon as he set my feet back on the ground and turned back to the grill, I bit my lip nervously. I didn't want to appear as desperate for information about Edward as I actually was. "Well, you know, never a dull moment with Alice around. I'm beginning to feel slightly bad for Jasper, being neglected all the time."

"Are you kidding me?" Emmett laughed in his booming fashion, and turned to look over at me. "I should be thanking you! With Edward gone up north for the summer, I didn't think my car would get done before I head up to UW in September. But with Jasper around, I have a shot."

"You still haven't finished that car?" I laughed and shook my head, while silently thanking him for broaching the topic of Edward so I wouldn't have to. I sat down on the picnic table beside the grill and looked down at my hands in my lap. "So… how is Edward?"

After a moment of silence, I chanced a look up at Emmett and saw an expression I couldn't decipher before he seemingly plastered a smile on his face. "He's fine, Bells. I told him you were coming over today. He says hi and he misses you."

I breathed out a disbelieving laugh as my eyes fell down to my lap. "Never know it from my end," I replied softly, suddenly wishing I had never asked. Knowing that he could pass messages through his brother but couldn't take the time to even answer a text message was almost worse than not knowing at all. "You know, it's not like I'm the one who's taken off to no man's land and pretending that my best friend doesn't exist."

I kept my eyes in my lap, but I felt his presence move in front of me to sit on the other side of me on the table. He let out a heavy sigh and was quiet for a moment before I finally heard him speak again, softer than I had ever heard it. "It's not like that, Bella. He's just busy catching up with our old friends up there, and he also feels bad about what happened the night before he left. I think he might be afraid that you're still angry with him."

I scoffed and shook my head, looking up to force back angry tears that were forming. "And completely ignoring me is supposed to make me less angry? That's how this all started in the first place! He pushed me away and completely ignored me all night, Emmett. And then I didn't even get to say goodbye before he left and…"

"Wait," Emmett interrupted me abruptly, causing me to stop short and look over at him. He analyzed my face for a moment and then glanced around the yard to see that everyone else was still inside helping Esme and then brought his gaze back to me. "So you're not mad at him for going alpha male on the beach?"

I felt my brow knitting together in confusion and shook my head. "What are you talking about? All I remember from that night is Edward completely blowing me off for reasons I have yet to figure out. I don't even remember going back to Alice's that night. And then I wake up, and Edward's gone and all I got was a text message saying 'sorry see you in a few weeks'."

Emmett sighed heavily and folded his hands in front of him. "Look, it's not really my place to say anything. But you were pretty wasted that night, and Edward saw you talking to that Jacob Black kid. There's some bad blood between him and Edward and he was only trying to protect you."

"Jacob Black," I replied softly with a nod. The name sounded familiar to me, though I couldn't place it. I had heard it before, long before the night at the beach, so I stored the name in my mental catalog. I had a feeling I was going to need it in the near future.

"But if it's any consolation," Emmett interrupted my thoughts nudging my elbow with his, and I looked over at him. "You have a great right hook on you when you're pissed. Shocked the hell out of Edward and I think he may have even gotten on the plane with the welt still visible."

I gasped as he began to laugh and I shook my head. "Emmett, that's not funny! I hit him?" I exclaimed loudly, even catching the attention of Alice and Rosalie who were just coming outside. Sure, I had slapped and punched Edward in jest in the past, but never out of anger and certainly never with the intent to hurt or mark him. Then again, I never remembered being as angry as I was with Edward that night, the parts of it that I could remember anyway. And it seemed that I was missing out on more than a few significant details and that bothered me to my core.

"Bells, he's a big boy. Hell, it was probably even good for him," Emmett replied with a smile with his arm around my shoulders, hugging me gently against him before standing up to return to the grill.

I remained at the table biting my lip and sinking deep into thought. Things still weren't completely adding up for me. Even if Edward was still thinking that I was mad at him, why would he not want to talk to me and sort it out? Avoiding me was going to solve nothing.

Alice and Rosalie joined me, with Esme scolding us to get our butts off the table. We all lowered on the bench and I tried to keep up with the conversation, but soon enough I got the all too familiar huff from Alice. I looked over and she was sitting beside me with her arms folded over her chest, glaring at me scornfully. "You haven't been listening to a thing I've been saying, have you?"

I smiled embarrassedly and shook my head, inciting a small growl from her. "Sorry, Al. I just have a lot on my mind and I zoned. What were you saying?"

Alice sighed dramatically and rolled her eyes. "I was saying," she emphasized for effect, and I heard Rosalie laugh from my other side. Rose and I really had not had the chance- or the inclination really- to bond at all in the time she'd been with Emmett. That was Alice's forte, not mine. She rubbed me the wrong way, but I was cordial because she was Emmett's girlfriend. "That while you were out here breaking the girl code by associating with a guy, Rose, Esme and myself were inside talking about Edward's coming home party. Huge cookout, pool party…"

"They don't have a pool," I pointed out hastily, gesturing my hand to the yard. "Kinda required to have such a party."

Alice brought her hand up behind me and gave me a swift thwack on the back of the head. "No shit, Sherlock, you don't say! This is where refraining from visits to la-la land pay off. Esme convinced Carlisle to install a pool while Edward was away to surprise him when he gets back. Guess Edward really misses the swim team."

"And the Speedos!" Emmett's voice hooted from over by the grill, sending all three of us into giggles. Though I could feel my face beginning to burn as I found myself actually trying to form a mental picture of it.

"So, we were thinking, if you and Edward would get your heads out of your asses before then, it might actually be a fun way to wrap up the summer," Alice finished, giving me a pointed look.

"Edward and I do not have our heads up our… wait, wrap up the summer?" I asked, my brow furrowing. There was still two months before school started up again. "He's going to be back in another week or so, isn't he?"

"Oh," Alice replied uncomfortably, biting her lip as she glanced over at Rosalie. "I thought Emmett would have told you but Edward isn't coming back until the week before school starts. He's helping Tanya's father build an addition onto their house up there…"

Alice kept talking but I was no longer listening as I felt my stomach drop out. Was this why he was dodging my attempts to contact him, knowing how upset I would be when I found out? I wouldn't imagine why Edward would keep something this important from me though, even if I did get upset. "Excuse me," I whispered as I rose from the table quickly and walked across the yard. I could feel everyone's eyes on me and for once, I really didn't care. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and called Edward. He and I were going to have this out now.

I heard the phone click as it answered and my heart soared, but it quickly plummeted as the voice I was waiting for was not the one that greeted me. It wasn't that soft velvet smooth voice I had missed so much. It was unmistakably a groggy but very feminine voice. "Hello?"

I stammered awkwardly for a moment, unsure of what to say; this was something I had not prepared myself for at all. "I'm sorry, I must have the wrong number," I said quickly, trying to will away the image in my head.

"Are you looking for Edward? He's right here," the voice replied and I heard the distinctive sound of a mattress creaking under shifting weight. "Sweetie? Phone for you."

Sweetie? A woman answering his phone from bed, and from the sounds of it, not all that far away from him? My throat tightened and my breath stalled. "Hello?" his voice groaned sleepily from the other end, but I couldn't form the words. "Hello?"

I quickly flipped my phone closed before I could even utter a single word. I hadn't thought it was possible for my heart to plummet any further, but somehow it managed. I didn't know what to think or feel anymore. He went up there to be with his ex, Tanya. Why hadn't I put two and two together before this? Alaska… his first girlfriend… his first. Oh yes, I'd heard all about Tanya; definitely more than I cared to.

I had to get out of there; this was too much to take. Granted, Edward didn't owe me a damn thing but this hurt worse than him ignoring me. It felt almost like a betrayal of sorts. I was supposedly one of his best friends, but he couldn't be honest about this? I walked over to Alice and her face fell at the look on my face. "I'm not feeling very well, Alice. I'm think I'm gonna go home."

"Are you alright?" Alice asked in a concerned voice and I sighed heavily, looking down. "Let me just get my keys and tell Jasper, and I'll take you home."

"Don't be silly. I'll just call Charlie and have him come pick me up. There's no need for both of us to go," I replied quickly as I shook my head. "I monopolize enough of your time. Spend some time with Jasper."

Alice acquired an almost guilty look, and glanced over at Jasper briefly and then brought her eyes back to me. "You sure? I mean, we have all day after all."

"Absolutely. Charlie's off today anyway, so it won't be any problem. I just kinda need to be alone for a bit," I replied sadly, and from the look in Alice's eyes it seemed she understood more than even I could grasp. "I'll call you tomorrow."

I slowly began walking away toward the house and called Charlie after explaining my "situation" to Esme. The ride home with him was quiet as usual, until we were almost there and a new thought struck me. "Dad, how far is it to La Push?"

Charlie looked over at me questioningly, raising an eyebrow. "About ten, maybe fifteen miles. Why?"

"Nothing," I replied casually, shrugging my shoulders and staring into my lap. After a moment of pondering, I took a deep breath and turned my gaze back to him. "Would you mind taking me there?"

"Thought you weren't feeling well?" Charlie challenged and cast me a sideways look before returning his attention back to the road. "Why, what's in La Push?"

"Someone I need to talk to," I replied flatly and shook my head. "Really, Dad, I'm alright. I just needed to get away from the Cullens' house. Was just a little weird without Edward there and all."

If Charlie caught my lie, he never showed it and silently drove me to La Push. As we were pulling up to the beach, I asked him to pull over as I spotted a group of bronzed skinned young men. One of them had to know this Jacob Black. "Thanks, I'll call you later."

Charlie took my arm before I could get out of the car, giving me the 'dad look' I knew all too well. "You have your pepperspray?" he asked firmly, eyeing the same group of boys.

I sighed heavily and rolled my eyes. "Yea, Dad," I scoffed and pulled it out of my purse to show him, shoving it back in before I got out of the car. As he drove away, I began thinking about how well thought out this plan was not. The only things I knew about this Jacob was that he lived in La Push, and Edward didn't want me anywhere near him. This, in my state of mind at that moment, gave me even more reason to move forward with my plan.

I walked toward the group and cleared my throat behind one of them. "Excuse me?" I said softly and felt myself blush furiously as he turned around to look at me curiously. "I was just wondering if any of you knew where I could find Jacob Black?"

"Actually I do," the young man, who seemed to tower a head or two above me, replied with a smile. "You're looking at him."

I blush increased as I realized how idiotic I must seem to him. You had to pick this one to question, didn't you, Bella? I took a deep breath trying to hold onto the last shred of dignity I could muster. "Hi, I don't know if you remember me. But we met a few weeks ago, at a beach party?"

His smile increased to reveal one of the most illuminating smiles I had ever seen. "I remember very well… Bella," he replied, and my eyes widened. I wasn't entirely sure if it was a good thing or not that he remembered me. "Though I must admit I'm surprised you do. What can I do for you?"

I was finding it most difficult to understand what it was about him that caused such seething hatred from Edward. He was friendly and polite, and there was a comfort he exuded that I couldn't quite comprehend, but I was beginning to notice that it was contagious. "Actually, I don't remember much about that night. And I was hoping that's where you could help me."