Thanks to all my little helpers out there! I'll stay in contact with you guys and PM you when I have some questions or I'm going to post questions like I'm going to do in this chapter. And…I know I haven't updated in like…forever! And I really have no excuse this time. See I started this other story…Twilight story…which in my opinion is really good and I hope you guys check it out. But I got a wee bit obsessed with it. Then Christmas came and boxing day…couldn`t miss out on those, then New Years…then the whole family drama bit. Not much of an excuse I know, so here is your long awaited chapter.

Question: How old is Jamie? #2: Could you name ALL the host characters? Or at least the ones at the cave who lived in hiding, this is critical you don't forget anyone.

Song for chapter: You Be The Anchor That Keeps My Feet On The Ground, I'll Be The Wings That Keep Your Heart In The Clouds- by Mayday Parade. Long title, awesome song, I love them. Doesn't relate MUCH but does partly.

Last Chapter (Ch11)

T-Tell me please." I whispered, though I was too afraid to actually know.

"Their dying." They whispered.

Then my world came crashing down.

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Chapter 12.

Wanda's POV.

I enter the tent quickly, tears of pain, pain so strong that no other feeling could over power, in my eyes. The news so unbelievable. Have you ever heard something so…so horrible that you refuse to believe it? This is one of those cases. I refuse to believe that my family or what's left of it is dying. Why are things so much harder than they already were? Why are we being tortured like this? I feel like one of those ants under a microscope being burned to death by earth children who laugh while you scream in pain.

First we were captured, then we were separated, then Sunny, and Jared, and then the whole Blaze-Ian thing, now this.

This horrible cruel twisted fate!

My innocent family! The humans who have loved me, and who I have loved in return. The humans who have accepted me into their lives, only to have it taken away from them. All their kindness, all their generosity is nothing anymore. You would have thought that their kindness would have paid for something that their kind hearts would save them from this evil fate, but no, it didn't. Stuff like that doesn't matter in this cruel world. This world, in truth, is an ugly, grieving, place where people are forced to live a life that is atrocious. Where, when it comes down to it, the love, the happiness, the kindness, is nothing when you are condemned to hell. This is my hell. I'm already in hell. I cannot a imagine a place where the pain could be worse.

Bad things happen to good people. That's what it is. And what about the people who sin? What about them? What about the people who only have hatred into their hearts? Do they not suffer the fraction of pain we must go through? Must it always be the kindest of souls to live such cruelty? Is there never any justice?

They have done nothing wrong but try to live in their planet. The one we so viciously took from them. I hate my kind, I hate myself. All our happiness from before, all our laughs, and our smiles are only but a memory of what we have lost. Is there noting but terror in this world? Are things not allowed to be okay? Must there always be something that goes wrong.

I ask too many questions, I realize that now. But it's not my fault! When life throws me this…this mess at my face, of course I'm going to ask questions. Does this mean nothing to no one but me? Suddenly my eyes landed on a small figure, far skinnier than I would have remembered.

Jamie.

That`s the first thing that came to mind. He just...laid there. On the mattress. His usual tanned skin was ghostly pale, his breathing laboured. His eyes were shut closed, sweat on his forehead. Next to him were Aaron and Travis, both of them in the same condition as Jamie. They looked horrible. The sight of them…so innocent, so sick. It's so wrong, Jamie is too young… his life is still ahead of him. But then again, evil and pain have no limits; it doesn't stop because some is young, or if someone is beautiful. It devours over them just the same, causing the same heart wrenching feeling.

"Jeb and Doc are in another tent." Melanie whispered behind me. "Lily and Heidi are in another."

Both of our eyes landed on the unconscious Jamie, both our eyes holding that longing and pain for the boy who lay there. We both loved him equally because we both used to be one.

"Oh God." I cried and burst into sobs, the weight of all the problems that had been hanging above my head all came crashing down as I fell to the ground.

"Oh Wanderer." Melanie whispered and wrapped her arm around my shoulder. "I would say its okay but…but I'm not going to lie. I know this is bad, and I know that we're in a situation that seems impossible…but we can't give up. Not yet."

I cried into her shoulder. "Where did you find them?"

"We went searching for you." She said quietly, "We found them in a cave, we looked for the others but there's not sign of them. We went on raid quickly, grabbing more tents and supplies. We couldn't get much medicine because we had to hurry back; after all you were still missing. Sunny…didn't take things too well, you know, Kyle and all."

I saw that Melanie had tears running down her face, and I saw she was trying to be brave, trying to be strong. But once and a while, we all need to show weakness.

"Jared is in a better place now." I told her, knowing where her mind was. Her eyes filled with pain and a small sob escaped from her lips.

"I tell myself that every day." She whispered her voice cracking. "That he's better off where he is now. That it would be better that he was not here…but it's so hard. I w-want him here. I miss him; I miss every part of him."

I hugged her tightly. "He doesn't feel pain anymore. He escaped it, he's happy."

"Do you believe in heaven?" She asked me, her eyes shining with tears. "Do you believe that we actually go to a place with golden gates and choirs of angels when we die?"

I hesitated, staring at her closely. Her chest was heaving up and down, her features almost begging for me to say yes. I've never been much for religion, so I don't know what I believe in.

"I don't know if there's a heaven…" I murmured, and Melanie's face fell. "But," I said quickly. "I know that once we die, we go somewhere better. No matter where it is, it's just not here. When we die…I think that…well I don't know what I think. I just know that anywhere other than where we are now would be a blessing. Anywhere we can we escape this pain, this sick cruel life, is heaven. No matter the definition."

She sniffed, "Do you think Jared is in heaven?"

I chose my words carefully. "I know that he's happy, the he's no longer in pain. And I also know, Melanie. That he is always with you. He loves you, and you love him, that will never change."

Tears fell faster down her cheeks and she nodded, hugging herself closer to me. "Thank you."

We sat there in silence, dwelling in out sorrows. All the pain that has been inflicted on us, all the times we've tried to be strong all crumbled against us, hitting us with full force. The loss of love, the absence of love, but most importantly the endangered love. We have lost so much already, we are not going to lose more.

"This is a mess." I grumbled eventually.

"It is," She agreed. "We're going to have to get more medicine. We need cool, heal, all those stuff. We can't risk anymore time. And while we're at it, we'll get some for your little…procedure."

I smiled sadly. "I understand how you must have felt." I said quietly. "Being trapped in there. I can relate now, because it's Ian. Ian is in there, but he can't… he c-can't…"

"It's fine." Melanie soothed gently. "We'll get him in time. Once we find a host and get the right-"

"Why is it all so complicated?" I cried, "Why can't people just live happily?!"

"Because," Melanie whispered, "This is reality. And happiness comes at a price."

I sniffled and stood up quickly, reaching my hand down to Melanie.

"Do you know exactly what they have?" I asked her, my voice holding no hope.

She shook her head. "Sunny took their temperatures, its deathly high. They can't hold out much longer, we've been working on Doc the most, so if…when he gets better he can explain to us what…what is happening."

"It'll be fine." I said, mostly trying to convince myself. "We'll just get more medicine and they'll be fine."

"That's the problem." Melanie's voice quivered. "They aren't responded to it."

New tears gathered in my eyes and fell down my cheek. Why?!

"What do you mean?" I cried, how could the world make this more difficult than it already is? Sometimes when you're life is already hell, you're not afraid of dying. Sometimes you want to die. Sometimes death is a way to escape the death. Oh great, now I'm suicidal aren't I? No, I refuse to go that way. If I go, I go fighting. No matter what, I will not leave this world without my fight. I will die in rage if I have to.

"It's just…not working. I don't know! It's not working the way it should!" She cried and broke out into sobs again.

"I don't…I don't understand. Is there something wrong with it?"

"Not it," She whispered into her hands. "Them. They caught something that can't be treated with these new medicines that those freaking souls have."

I winced slightly at her words, but I knew she didn't mean them directing towards me. You get used to it after a while, having people think badly about souls. I mean, I already know I'm the outcast, the betrayer of all that is right. But that's who I am now, by living with them I already accepted the fact that I'm different, the very cause of their problems.

"We'll think of something." I said desperately. "We have to." Yes we have to, I am not going to let the people who cared for me just die. I will not just sit around and wait for their breathing to stop. No. I'm going to try. I can't fail until I try, and I am going to try to the end. Death come if it will, but I am not letting these people die from the faults of kind. I refuse to let the other souls have such a power over them. I will show them. I will prove to the souls that I am strong. That we can fight back. They think we're so powerless, well just wait and see.

"I know." Melanie replied hoarsely. Then Sunny opened the tent door and stuck her head in.

"As much as I'd love to willow in sadness with you guys. Blaze woke up, and he's asking, no demanding for Wanda."

With that, she left, not a single trace of emotion on her face. Nothing at all, as if she was empty. And actually, I think she is.

Melanie sighed and wiped the tears away. "She hasn't been the same since we found them." She told me. "It's worrying me. She doesn't react the way she use to. She's too high-strung now, she's snappy too. She's trying to be strong, I can see that. She's closing herself off from the Sunny she used to be."

"Things can only get better from here." I whispered, though I really, really, doubted it. "When we lose someone we love, we tend to do that."

"I hope so, Wanda. I really hope so." Melanie answered and walked out of the tent, and I followed behind her. "It's so crazy."

"What's crazy?" I asked her quietly, there are a million of things that are crazy, but I'd take hours to explain them all.

"Haven't you noticed Sunny, you, and I, have lost our love ones? Only in different ways?" The tone to her voice was almost hysterical, as if she was losing it. "Sunny has no idea where Kyle is, you, well I think you're the luckiest, Ian is here, but you can't get to him. And me, poor little Melanie, my Jared is gone, dead, forever."

Her voice was tight and I saw tears in her eyes, I placed a hand on her shoulder. "If you really think about it." I told her, "You're the luckiest; you know that Jared is okay, you never have to worry about him anymore. You know that he's fine. And you know you'll get to see him later, when it's your turn in life, and you know that he's going to be there waiting for you."

She sniffled, "I don't think we can call any of us lucky."

"That's true." I agreed and began to walked out into the light.

The sun was high in the sky, burning my skin. "Sunny and I will get the stuff ready; meet us at the car in 5 minutes."

"What about Blaze?" I asked, not wanting to leave him here alone.

"He's welcome to come to, as long as he can keep his mouth shut." She shrugged and walked away.

I huffed and started my way over to the tent where Blaze was. I pulled the zipper down and walked inside, Blaze was lying on the ground staring at the roof of the tent. He didn't even move when I entered, he was unresponsive, and this scared me greatly.

"That was Sunny wasn't it?" Blaze asked without looking at me. "The one who hit me."

I laughed awkwardly and sat down next to him. "Yes, and Melanie was the other one."

He nodded but still didn't look at me. "I remember them for Ian's memories."

I nodded mutely and stared at my hands. "We're going on raid now, to get the things we need. Would you like to come?"

"You're going to get the things you need to get me out of here aren't you? My new host too?" He asked, ignoring my question. A felt a blade go through my heart at his sad sharp tone, obviously in pain.

"Yes." I whispered, blush spreading through my cheeks.

"Why do you bother?" He asked me suddenly, his voice tight. "Just get me out of here, I don't need a host. Just kill me."

My eyes widened and the pain in my heart grew stronger. "Don't talk like that! You are not going to kill yourself to do you understand me?"

"It will be too much trouble anyways. Just get what you need, get me out, get the other better, you'll have you're Ian, I won't matter."

I opened my mouth to protest but he cut me off. "Don't lie to me Wanderer. You want your Ian, nothing more."

I shut my mouth quickly. "You are a part of my family. And I don't give up on family. You belong here. And I want you here. I'm not doing this just for Ian; I'm doing this for you as well."

He snorted and still didn't meet my eyes. "Please," He scoffed, "I mean nothing, and I am nothing more than an intruder to your perfect little world."

"Perfect?" I exclaimed, suddenly hysterical. "My world is far from perfect."

"You understand, though." He said, "You asked to die too."

The memory caught up with me, I don't remember well because it was Melanie's body, but I still do, slightly. I asked Doc to kill me, instead he put me into a host, and introduced me to this beautiful life, the life that now turned into a black hole of no return.

"Yes, but they didn't listen to me did they? And I'm glad they didn't, and one day you'll be glad I didn't either."

He laughed, "I don't think I ever will. Really, Wanderer. Do you like torturing me? It will only be harder if I am in a different host."

"No," I protested, "I don't think it will. See when I was in Melanie's body-"

"Yes I know." He hissed, interrupting me with his frightening tone. And I saw him wince slightly, no doubt getting a scolding from Ian. "You're feelings magically changed from Jared to the tremendous Ian O'shea. Love and lust, that whole bit. Well I know what love is, Wanderer."

"Not yet," I whispered quietly so he didn't heart. "I was once an intruder too." I said my voice faintly stronger. I turned his face towards me, and my eyes met his. "I used to be the intruder." I repeated, "I use to be the outcast. Thinking everyone hated me."

He stared at my painfully and it hurt so much…he was still Ian, he looked like Ian…and to see Ian in such pain…even if it isn't him, is still unbearable.

"But look where I am now. People were nice to me; they weren't the monsters I thought they were. You are family Blaze. As much as you can think otherwise it won't change the fact. Think what you must, but I know the truth. We are all intruders, Blaze. Both you and I. We are souls, we have no right to take their earth, but at least we're on the right side. At least we have people who care about us."

His tortured expression slowly softened and he sighed. "I don't want to go either way." He said quietly.

"Will you be okay here on your own?" I asked him.

"Yes," He replied, "I need time to think either way."

I nodded and stood quickly. I turned towards him before I left.

"Bye, Ian and Blaze." I whispered and then left them to their thoughts. I keep referring to them as Blaze, but Ian is there too. My precious Ian is there too, I cannot forget that. He needs to know that I think about him too. That I love him.

With that, I left them to their thoughts.

Blaze's POV.

"Bye, Ian and Blaze." Wanderer whispered and disappeared.

Ian and Blaze.

Are we referred to as two people now? As far as I knew, I thought I was Blaze.

Wanderer…she is so kind, so beautiful all the things I know I can never find anywhere else. She is the woman I love, and I can't do anything about it.

I don't choose who I fall in love with, I mean, who exactly does pick who we fall in love with? Some mighty force? Some God who chooses our path in life? I don't believe in that. But really, I didn't pick her randomly, going 'oh there the girl I'm going to fall in love with' no, she was something that came to me. Something I can't even explain. But I just love her.

"It'll pass soon." Ian said, "It's just the body that reacts the way it does."

"I doubt it." I whispered back.

"It's true though." Ian persisted, "Wanderer felt the same way for Jared but they didn't end up together."

"I know that." I hissed, "But this is something deeper, I can feel it."

"No matter what you feel," Ian growled, "It will not change anything, Blaze. Remember that, she is mine. Do not torture yourself further, Blaze. I care for you as a brother, but stop messing with my wife."

Ian laughed without humour. "Wife?" I asked, almost repulsed.

"Well…" Ian answered, "Not yet."

That was all I could bear, my heart could only manage so much. I shut my eyes and tried to zone out of this world. Trying to sleep again even though I wasn't tired. Sleep is my escape to pain, where I can zone out of my body and just float. At least…that's what I used to think. Before all my dreams are filled about her. Sometimes both my dreams and reality torture me to a point where I can't stand it.

When will I ever escape this twisted fate?

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There's you long awaited chapter, sorry again. Anyways, I have a question for everyone! Just a show of hands, how many people want me to bring Jared back? Because I'm really not planning to, it would mess up the whole story, but maybe…just maybe if you guys really want me to I can. But…gah. Just give me your opinion.