Sometimes she found going into a fight an easier prospect than to return to Nagato in his state.
She gathered chakra in her hand and turned the handle, aware of protective jutsus that tested her chakra, jutsus that would do nasty things to anyone but her and Nagato, before the jutsus released and the latch lifted.
The room's smell of flowers, of leaves, of treesap and herbs filled her nostrils. Konan relaxed as she entered their last true sancuary. It was a strangely homely place compared to the rest of the building, Konan had brought the wooden planks and furnature from their childhood home, and had plants growing around the room. He had always liked the smell of the woods compared to the more machine-like smell of Amegakure. It helped him rest more peacefully. She stepped inside, reaching inside her robes to bring out a new plant for the room with one hand, reaching down to pull her pants off with the other.
Nagato rested uneasily against the frame, head against his chest, his breathing slow and easy as he rested. Nagato didn't have the energy anymore to be awake for long periods, unless he needed his full concentration for more than one body, and usually his concentration and focus went out through Yahiko's body while this one slept. He trusted Konan to keep this place safe, to keep his vunrable body safe, and she would never fail him.
"Idiot..." Konan muttered as she lifted a blanket around his shoulders. The room was warm and the black bars, while killing him slowly, kept him warm and perfectly alive in the short term. That had been his reassurance. How long was short term? A week? A year? Twenty? Fifty?
Konan's eyes were drawn to the window and she moved to open it slightly as she looked out. They were not, as people in Amegakure thought, on the tallest tower but on one of the more regular towers. Nagato would leave the bodies, including Yahiko's body, in the tallest tower. This one was on the outskirts and was a fairly ordinary thing. It had offices for the small government, and several offices for the shinobi, a middle class building without anyone of any particular rank or importance.
It was lunchtime and the workers sat outside far below, in the rare sunshine, laughing and eating. She could imagine their discussions. Work. Deadlines. Crazy shinobi demands on the budget. New laws. Permits for buildings. Those workers had the jobs that were normal and safe. It wouldn't matter who was the kage of Amegakure to those workers, their jobs were secure, they worked for the government, they would be needed no matter what shinobi leader ruled over them. Safe jobs. Even in wartime, you were more likely to be kept in that government position than in any other. Konan could never picture herself really able to do it. Her life had been too rocked by war to settle into a routine life like that.
Yahiko had found her when they were still barely beyond toddlers. Yahiko was protective over Konan from the second he'd grasped her hand and pulled her out of a burning building. Had that been their home? Had they been neighbours? They'd wondered that often as their got older but neither could remember.
She had no fucking clue how they'd managed to survive, two young and injured kids, only that they had, and they'd learnt very young to steal, to run, to hide. If adults had ever been safe, they'd forgotten, because adults were now dangerous and cruel. Older kids often took them in, at the start, as they took in all tiny children. They'd teach them to steal and then take advantage of their smallness, using the kids to steal food from markets while the bigger kids made a scene. Konan was caught once and almost beaten to death by a shop was protective over Konan from the second he'd grasped her hand and pulled her out of a burning building.
She couldn't remember that beating or anything before it, probably a head injury, aside from the occasional and foggy flashback. Konan never knew if it was reality from her past or just a dream.
Her first memory, the one she remembered without Yahiko's help, was waking after the beating. She was sore all over and was crying, but she was warm and being held against someone... and he had warm hair, and warm skin, and he held her and told her that he wasn't going to let anyone hurt her ever again. Her first memory of Yahiko and one that tended to replay itself everytime she got injured. Although he'd always liked her, the girl he'd found in the rubble, she knew him well enough to know that his real protectiveness over her probably was set in stone from the day she'd nearly been beaten to death. He helped a lot of kids out but Konan was special to him.
They'd found the cave when their hideout, filled with too many kids, had been discovered. She knew that a lot of her old friends had been hurt, raped, killed, tortured, she'd heard it, but Yahiko had held her and kept her hidden somewhere in the building. She hadn't really understood then, the screams over the lewd comments by the shinoi, but she understood now. They'd ran, and ran, and ran, and hid, and ran, and hid, and ran, through the city and through the forest, and through rocks that had gaps too big for adults, till they ended up accidently finding their cave.
Yahiko refused to let her leave for a long time after that, after seeing other girls used in that way, she knew he'd been afraid that they'd do the same to her. He hadn't understood it but he'd known that it was a terrible thing and a painful thing. So she'd stayed at the cave, as he brought food back, and crates, and lanturns, and anything else found abandoned in the ruined houses. He'd learnt a lot about the world as she'd stayed in the cave, learnt about sex, and rape, and murder, seeing it, forcing himself to watch it, forcing himself to remember what people did to Amegakure.
Konan found Nagato and his dog around that time and brought him back to the cave. Yahiko trusted Konan so reluctently started to trust Nagato also. It was about that time that he finally started to tell them what he'd seen, every terrible detail, the burden too much for him to carry. The three of them shared it and agreed to share every terrible thing from then on. Agreed to protect each other. To stop it one day. They all hated being helpless, all hated being children, hated being little and unable to protect anyone. They also hated stealing food. It was their country, their people, they hated stealing things from it.
It became routine for them after a while, the three of them, Yahiko always leading, to beg for food from anyone and everyone. Nagato and Konan backed him up as protection. Sometimes it worked and sometimes it didn't. But it led them to Jiraiya.
Jiraiya had been probably the first adult that Yahiko and Nagato let close to Konan. It was a very significant thing, the trust they'd put in him, she doubted he ever really understood the big event that it'd been. Yahiko smiled more and more, Nagato relaxed again, and the waning affection that they'd been showing Konan seemed to come back with full energy as they started to understand that males and females could be friends and could be close, without there being pain or cruelty involved. Jiraya and his female friend, Tsunade, seemed to shatter the terrible idea they'd had of being grown up males and females. Jiraiya's pervy nature scared the boys and Konan at first, but he seemed to sense their fear of that side of life, seemed to know that they needed to be retaught about the good side of it without scaring them silly. By the end, he could pretend to flirt with Konan and the boys would just laugh. Konan knew that if he'd tried that when they'd first met, they'd have tried to stab him and run.
Yahiko kissed her for the first time during those good years. So did Nagato. And they did it, fully aware of each other, as if they'd made an agreement to share her. It seemed totally natural to the three of them. They loved her and she loved them. So she'd snuggle them, they'd snuggle her, she'd sleep between them at night, kiss them both, hold their hands, all of it when they were safely hidden and all of it innocent, sweet and loving. Jiraiya knew about it. He even teased them about it.
And it was when Jiraiya left that they finally both slept with her.
Yahiko went first, of course, while Nagato comforted her through the pain of the first time, and then Nagato went, while Yahiko comforted her. It wasn't as bad as she'd expected. She'd later found out that Jiraiya had given them tips and the tips had made it not so bad the first time, and better and better after that. Madara had probably assumed he'd gotten her virginity, but it wasn't that, but the roughness that'd hurt her so much. No one had been rough with her. It'd shocked her too, how much it'd worked for her body as he kept doing it, like he'd train it to enjoy it everytime he made her go through with it.
Now, now that she was a full grown woman, she knew what normal relationships were supposed to be, she knew that two boys and a girl wasn't normal. But it had been natural and it had made sense.
They started to trust people and started their organization, the early Akatsuki, with old and new friends. Yahiko recruited shinobi who were sick of Hanzou, had them teach the rest, and his organization got famous as the skill of Akatsuki grew and grew. Konan, Nagato and Yahiko's relationship was impossible to hide. It was infamous amongst the early Akatsuki, everyone knew about it, but it didn't seem to offend either.
"Konan."
Konan jumped and snapped back to reality, shutting the window and turning to face what was left of Nagato now. He was still beautiful, his eyes the same as always, the expression reserved for her alone still there. He'd raised his arms for her.
"Come here." Nagato murmered, waiting patiently.
"Nagato." Konan went to him, under his arms, feeling the fragile things rest around her. She sighed and rested gently against his chest. "I was daydreaming."
"I know." He rested his head against the top of her head, sighing a deep sigh of relief as his body could rest against hers. "You do it everytime you come here. Every time."
"Should you be awake?" Konan felt his body struggle to sleep again, knew it well enough to know that when it did those little shudders in his neck and jaw that it wanted to sleep.
"I'll sleep later. Stay right here for now. I missed your smell."
Konan flushed. Had she showered in the past day? She hoped he was getting her 'good smell' Did Madara miss her smell? Konan regreted thinking of him straight away. He was everything that Yahiko and Nagato had wanted to keep from her.
"You're warm." Nagato murmered and reached up slowly, carefully, to stroke her flushed face. "Fever?"
"Probably. It is nearing winter." Konan lied, forcing the masked man out of her mind. "Should I..."
"Stay right here." He inturrupted her, and a chair was brought to them, with his jutsu. "I won't get it."
Konan slipped into it so that she could sit against his chest instead of stand. "What's wrong?"
"We're running out of time. Madara's impatient."
"He's talked with you?"
"Talking now." Nagato meant that Madara was talking with Yahiko's body. Konan nodded.
"Itachi is getting impatient. He will probably confront his brother soon. Madara believes it is time for the fight and will be gone till then, trailing Itachi and Kisame, waiting for the moment."
"Waiting to get another strong puppet..." Konan muttered. She felt him nod, above her head, a slight jerk of his head.
"He's been waiting for a long time for it."
"That's the last thing he needs... more puppets..."
"We'll deal with the problem of Madara when we need to." Nagato's arms tightened around her for a moment and then he let go as he sighed, a deep long sigh, his tense body relaxing just a tiny bit more. Konan shifted off the chair and away. Affection was over.
Konan started to check his piercings, one by one, dabbing antibacterial ointment around the openings. It wasn't needed- somehow he was kept in low to reasonable health by this jutsu- but it made her feel better. A lot better.
"He's leaving." Nagato pretended to ignore her, gazing at a fixed point in the ground, his eyes distant and glazed as he focused on his other bodies.
"Should I follow?"
"No need, Zetzu is keeping an eye on it."
Konan didn't answer. She doubted Zetzu was as loyal to Nagato as he believed, but then, she didn't think he was particually loyal to Madara either. He wavered too much for her... or maybe it was having two personalities that made him too unpredictable for her. Esspically when she knew he loved to try and catch her with Madara, or with the God Realm body...
"He stopped at your tower as well."
Fuck.
Konan froze and gazed up at Nagato. She felt that guilt build up somewhat again. Madara had stopped by. She knew what he'd been hoping to get before he left, and wasn't sure if she was glad that she hadn't been there. "I don't know why..."
"Yes, you do, Konan..." His voice took on a lower edge now, and his eyes narrowed, making her tense. Anger. "I know he harrasses you when he thinks I don't know."
"You do?" Fuck. Did he know it all?
"Of course I do. You never seem to notice... maybe you didn't know." Nagato's face softened a moment as he gazed at her, as good as a caress of her face as he could do, and he rested back down. "Every meeting with him, every time you walk away, or when you're meeting Akatsuki, he tends to try and harrass you. It's like a fucking tiger eying the next meal. I see his body langauge... I'm keeping an eye on him, don't worry. He can try and get a reaction from you all he likes, he can't touch you."
Konan relaxed too but she felt guilt again. Madara could touch her. He did. She even helped him keep it from Nagato. It wasn't that she wanted or desired Madara, not exactly, but he had a hold on her that she didn't know how to break. He didn't care if she wanted or desired him, he just prefered it that way. She knew it wasn't love. It was all about roles, and who was in charge, and how he could and would kill her if she wasn't useful to him in some way. Nagato's protection was great but Madara could hurt him badly if he told him what Konan had been doing with him...
She felt one of Nagato's hands stroking through her hair, slowly, and looked back up at Nagato.
"It's okay. You can handle him without me, I know... but I like to protect you." He smiled somewhat and it was like a knife through her chest.
"I know."
"Won't be long now. I promice." Nagato dropped his head, his eyes still open, heart visably thudding against his ribcage as he breathed. "Observing from the tower. Come join me soon?"
"I will.." Konan agreed, dropping her eyes, she couldn't look at him too long. The sight of him like this provoked a mixture of guilt, anger and disbelief even now... but she cared about him too much to let any of it out at him. What was done was done and she had to believe that it was for the best. Konan lifted the warm bucket of water and the cloth and slowly started to run the wet cloth over him in slow gentle circles, careful to ignore the piercings, cleaning him as gently as she could. Dribbles of water were already soaking her sleeves and torso.D
"Do it naked..." Nagato protested softly, eyes shutting a little more, the smile returning. "You'll get wet..."
She laughed, suddenly, an unexpected sound that rang through the room. It relaxed him. Konan stripped down and contined her work, adding a few 'skills' as she went.
