Of all the Disney related fish I could have made Kisame, I think I've made him one of the best here. I had the most fun so far writing this chapter, I think it's writing Suigetsu's lines that did it. that and possibly because The Little Mermaid was always my favourite Disney film. Hope you all enjoy it too!
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, the Akatsuki, The Little Mermaid, or anything else Disney related.
Kisame didn't know how much more he could take. First his legs were gone, the tail was pretty awesome, but he much preferred his legs. And he had a crown. That too was pretty awesome, he must be some sort of king. The trident was cool, but it was no Samehada. He missed his sword. And of course there was the little matter of Suigetsu.
Who kept randomly bursting into song.
Currently, the other mist nin had a green tail and was swimming in elegant circles, singing at the top of his lungs. All in all Kisame didn't think he would have minded the singing, but the bra? Two purple seashells were currently tacked onto the boy's chest. There was no purpose to them at all, but the boy refused to remove them. He began the song for what was now the eighteenth time and the older man covered his face with his hands. Of all the people, why?
"I'm gonna beat all of you swordsmen
I'm gonna slash and gonna stab you guys in!
I just can't wait until you are-what's that word?
Dead!
Just wait and see
Oh won't it be heaven, when I have seven?
That's where I'll be
I'll have you beat
With all of your swords!"
Kisame didn't have the heart to tell him that neither held a blade right now. The boy was having fun though, still grinning as ever. Karin sat on the arm of the throne. At least he wasn't in her position right now. He looked down at her.
"It's pretty bad isn't it?" he asked.
"Suigetsu's singing or the fact that I'm a crab?" she sulked,
"You shouldn't be so crabby all the time then!" Suigetsu laughed at his own terrible joke mid-song. The other two rolled their eyes.
"Yeah I guess I have it easy, I'm king of all the mermaids," Kisame grinned, "and most of them are pretty hot, I can finally get some action."
"You do realise that all the mermaids here are supposed to be your daughters right?" Karin informed him.
"What?"
"Have you never read the little mermaid?" Karin sounded offended. Kisame shook his head sadly. Karin sighed, straining her crabby features. "The little mermaid, it's about a mermaid who wants to live with humans. You are King Triton, father of the little mermaid, and her many, many sisters."
Kisame's face contorted with understanding. "So Suigetsu is the little mermaid?" he snickered, "so why are you a crab?"
"I have no idea; apparently I'm Sebastian the babysitting crab." She crossed her claws in anger. They both groaned as the sound of trumpets filled the air. Apparently the rest of the sea creatures were going to join the younger swordsman in his singing. Deciding he'd had enough Kisame rose from his throne of coral and waved his trident. A bolt of white light shot from it, vaporising those surrounding Suigetsu and stopping the song.
Suigetsu blinked at him in surprise. Kisame looked at the golden fork. He didn't know it could do that. Karin swam awkwardly upwards to perch on the huge merman's shoulders.
"Now that you've decimated the rest of the people here..." she began.
"Hey guys, we should probably try to find everyone else" Suigetsu but in. Kisame nodded. He doubted he could last much longer in the presence of the two. They bickered as much as Kakuzu and Hidan, and it grew to be quite irritating.
"Do you think everyone else is a fish?" the white haired boy asked swimming alongside him. They'd been travelling for almost a day now. Kisame's frequent threats to use the trident on the pair hadn't shut them up.
The shark like man could swear the ocean was getting shallower. The sun above seemed to shine brighter, and the colours of the coral below them was brighter and more varied. He loved the sea. It made him feel at home. He did however miss the rest of the Akatsuki. Well he missed Itachi and Konan to an extent. Anyone would be hard pressed to miss the other psychopaths. Ignoring Suigetsu's questioning, Kisame looked at the sea bed, studying it as they swam along. He noticed a shadow, separate from his own, shooting across the sands.
There was a sudden splash as a large object landed in the sea, displacing a large quantity of water around them. Kisame and Suigetsu flipped their fins agitatedly as Karin scuttled over to the object.
"It's a bed," the girl gone crab announced. Kisame sighed. He could see that. Crab-girl clawed her way up the bedding and began to bounce on it experimentally. Tired of flailing around with his tail, Kisame pointed his trident at himself and hoped for the best. In place of a tail, his legs appeared once again. He was now wearing pants in the same blue his tail had been.
Standing up, Kisame made his way over to the bed and sat down. It was an old thing, which creaked and sagged and he made himself comfortable. Around them the water began to rise, lifting the bed with it. It soon began to bob on the water's surface, rising steadily with the tide.
"Don't leave me behind!" Suigetsu yelped, slashing along after them, before making a triumphant flip onto the bed. He crossed his arms and began to sulk. He wanted legs too. And how dare they leave him behind? He glared at Kisame and Karin, who were ignoring him. A thought struck him. He knew exactly the right way to get what he wanted. Seeing what the water boy planned the other two covered their ears. Suigetsu opened his mouth wide.
Great, thought Kisame. He's singing again. Thinking Suigetsu had stopped he uncovered his ears momentarily, but it was at the wrong time.
"So come aboard and bring along all your hopes and dreams
Together we will find the great things that we're looking for
There's always room for you
If you wanna be my friend
We are, we are on the cruise!" Suigetsu had a ridiculous grin across his face, arms outstretched and eyes closed as he sang. Kisame had had enough. He bopped the younger male on the head with the trident, knocking him out. At least he hadn't been singing the other song he though with relief.
He pushed the unconscious boy to the end of the bed, and left Karin to nap where she was as they floated along the surface calmly. In the distance he could see land, a lighthouse dominated the skyline. He hoped they might find some friends there.
