hello :) Here's the newest chapter of finding Tobi. I have a guilty secret to admit with this chapter. The other day I was watching POTC and kept imagining Kakuzu in Jack's place. Oh the shame, I'm such a terrible terrible fangirl, that I would replace Johnny Depp with Kakuzu. So, there was more pirate Kakuzu for me, and here, is some more pirate kakuzu for you all. hope you enjoy it.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, the Akatsuki, Pirates of the Caribbean, Bambi, or anything else Disney related.
The five akatsuki members stared down into the steely abyss of the waterfall. Sasori, having been able to fly himself had grabbed Zetsu from the deck with the aid of a few chakra strings and shot into the air. Deidara, Hidan and Kakuzu had only just made it out. The blonde bomber had ended up using half of his clay to make a large owl quickly and he'd just managed to jump on it. Kakuzu acting hurriedly had shot out some threads after the clay creation, attaching himself to the safety of Deidara's sculpture. He'd also stupidly decided to save Hidan with another of his threads.
The immortal was currently dangling several feet below them all swearing loudly and swinging in the breeze. The huge waterfall roared beneath them.
"well, that was lucky, un" Deidara commented stupid. Sasori threw his hat at him.
"Tick tock," Zetsu agreed meekly.
"Why on earth does Zetsu keep saying tick tock?" asked Kakuzu, pulling himself and Hidan up onto the back of the owl. Deidara shifted to let them on.
"It's because you're a pirate, the world Sasori was in had pirates too. it's supposed to be some sort of warning," the blonde explained. Kakuzu nodded slowly, the decorations about his person tinkled gently.
"Well this is fucked up," pouted Hidan, settling back at the tail end of the bird. "where in Jashin's name are we supposed to go to now,"
"I'm not going anywhere in Jashin's name," Kakuzu snapped at him. Sasori decided to interrupt them with a loud cough before the argument could get worse. The three on the bird looked at him.
"We may have to go down the waterfall," he stated calmly.
"Huh? But why Danna?" Deidara looked puzzled.
"If you care to look, there appears to be a portal at its base. Perhaps we must pass through it to find the others." Explained the redhead.
"That makes sense," agreed Kakuzu. He didn't mind what they did so long as his treasure was safe. Although his snazzy pirate hat had fallen off in the confusion and he had a mild compulsion to see it again.
"No way, no fucking way," Hidan began to protest.
"Well, there is another reason besides the portal," Sasori deadpanned, "I just dropped Zetsu,"
"What?" shrieked Deidara, grabbing his sides as he laughed. The zombie twins stared over the side of his bird. Sure enough they could see something that was not water rippling at the bottom. They could just make out a green blur falling away before it vanished at the surface of the ripples.
"You're first on my menu puppet boy!" Zetsu's angry voices called out in unison.
Itachi scowled in the way only an Uchiha can. He'd been forced to the back of the group, while the cricket that was his brother was at the front with Konan. It wasn't his fault the stupid buy insisted on trying to kill him at every opportunity. Every now and then Suigetsu would bounce across their path with some cute woodland creatures. The white haired swordsman had hit his head when Kisame had pushed him through the portal and he'd been exceptionally perky every since. At least he wasn't singing now. Itachi didn't think he could handle that at Kisame's inane chattering. Oh sure, he'd been flattered at first. The conversation, if you could call it that, had been about him. It still was about him. He was now worried that his sharky friend had an unhealthy obsession with him, and wondered what was going to happen once he reverted back to his human form. If he reverted back to his human form that is.
At that moment the younger of the two swordsmen decided it was time to bound after a herd of deer, right across their path. It made Kisame jump, and as he was holding Karin's bowl, the water in it splashed upwards and out onto Itachi. Startled at the water he let out a jet of fire which incinerated a small bush. Karin pushed herself up on her claws and peered over the top of the bowl.
"Suigetsu, will you cut that out?" she shrieked, "we do not need another Juugo in our group!"
Suigetsu, entranced by the burning bush merely stared at her, his eyes full of wonder. Itachi could hear his brother chirping something from Konan's shoulder at the front of the group. Konan in turn began to pet and speak in soothing tones to the little insect. Kisame continued walking as if nothing had happened.
They were on a beach. Chunks of wood and fishing nets littered the shoreline and a great dune of sand rose up behind them. The air was dry and the sky bright and cloudless. It was odd as no matter where he looked Kakuzu could not see the sun. His four companions lay against the sand dune. Zetsu, Deidara and Hidan were all panting heavily as they rested on the fine white shore. Sasori seemed to just be sat down for something to do.
Kakuzu decided he'd climb up to the top of the dune, see where they could go next. He checked his pockets as he climbed. Yes! His little pouch was still tucked into his waistcoat. He pulled it out, just to reassure himself his money was safe. It was odd, the little packet seemed lighter, and softer than before. Reaching the top of the sandy hill, he pulled the drawstring and began to empty it onto his hand. It was filled with sand. Sand and nothing but sand! He allowed every last grain to trickle out onto his hand, frozen with shock.
The other members of his group were surprised and jumped up for action when they heard and almighty groan of anguish from high above them. Hidan spun around and saw his partner at the top of the dune before laughing.
"My money!" wailed Kakuzu, dropping to his knees and clutching his head in his hands, "my beautiful treasure is all gone!"
"Ha, serves you right, you tight fisted old bastard," the religious one screamed back at him.
Kakuzu continued to cry while the others lay back down on the sand. They'd deserved a rest. As his sobbing drew to a close he struggled to his feet and hobbled down the other side of the dune. He stopped as he stumbled forwards onto something soft. A bed? Before him lay a worn, battered, leather hat. The very one he had lost. Suddenly his money didn't matter anymore as he snatched up the headgear. Smugly he pulled it onto his head, and sank back onto the bed.
He almost allowed himself to doze off, staring out across the desert that lay before him. He blinked a few times. Was that rock there before? He blinked again. Now there were even more rocks.
Being in the Akatsuki certainly prepared Kakuzu for seeing weird things. The thing he was about to witness was one of those events any normal person may have been shocked by. Kakuzu however sat back with a tired smile on his stitched face.
One of the rocks stood up. Several others followed suit. They began to click and creak, before the entire ground was made up of the strange creature. All at once the rock split, stony claws stretching out of their hard little bodies. They were crabs made of rock. They little beings surged forwards and Kakuzu felt his bed lurch with them. They all tumbled upwards and over the sand, towards the crest of the dune.
On the other side the rest of the group watched as tiny crabs began to march over the hill towards them. The first few had been slightly amusing, especially as they watched Zetsu scampering around on his belly trying to eat them. Now the gigantic tidal wave of rocky crustacean was heading straight for them. Hidan and Deidara were felled backwards, not enjoying their ride on the crabs. Sasori calmly jumped out of there way and flew over to Kakuzu on the bed. Seeing a tongued hand he pulled his partner from the onslaught of crabs. Hidan managed to pull himself aboard the bed too, while Zetsu snapped his jaws around the bedding. Kakuzu was clutching his hat as their new vehicle stormed onwards.
Kisame's group seemed to go only deeper into the never ending forest. All about them gathered more and more animals, much to their irritation. So far the group of hardened criminals had fled, deer after deer, a rabbit, a skunk, more rabbits, the skunk again, and a possum. They had eventually come across a clearing and settled there for a rest. Suigetsu, no longer concussed from Kisame's rough treatment was sat on the other side of the clearing to them all, pouting and scowling at the blue man every few minutes. Konan had pulled out several sheets of paper and was attempting to recreate the flowers around them from the origami. Sasuke watched intently. Kisame set down the bowl he was carrying on the forest floor and Karin popped out for a scuttle around. Itachi began to amuse himself blowing smoke rings.
They all stopped these activities however, when the bluebirds tweeting nearby ceased. There was an odd whistling noise, and the terrifying yells of grown men coming from somewhere. They all watched enthralled as a shadow began to form at the centre of the clearing. The whistling and roaring grew louder, as the shadow grew larger and darker.
A blur of white shot past their eyes, and a thumping crash scared the remaining wildlife from the area. Kisame and Konan stood and began to walk towards the bed. Suigetsu on the other hand had snatched up one of the rocky crabs that had fallen from the bed.
"Look Karin!" he proclaimed, "I found you a boyfriend!"
"Shut up you stupid fish boy!" she shrieked back, latching onto him with a sharp claw. The others were still looking at the bed where it's inhabitants were disentangling themselves from one another.
"Tick, tock"
"Watch my hat!"
"Shut the fuck up about your Jashin damned hat,"
"Brat, take your foot out of my ass,"
"Danna! I tore my dress, un!"
