DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT ONW BLEACH.

WARNING: GIRLxGIRL SMUT (lol)

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Chapter 6

Kisuke and Renji sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G

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Western Karakura

Eleven years ago

Kisuke Urahara swore to all the gods, to anyone who would listen, that was no pedophile.

Everybody, heck even Tessai, raised their brows when he brought the lanky and somewhat good looking red haired fourteen year old boy home, who he claimed he wanted to train. You see, the first time he ever laid his eyes on Renji (that was the boy's name; by the way), he was fighting a bunch of older kids. He guessed it was the way the kid fought. He had no plan at all; he was just using his brute force. But he had a sort of grace though that Kisuke liked a lot. He was thinking that the boy had a lot of potential, so after the fight was over, he presented his proposition to the boy.

The blond man watched as the boy greedily devoured all the food on the table. It was no laughing matter really, how he managed to snare this boy's attention at the mere mention of food. The boy was an orphan and living on the streets after all.

The boy was distrusting of all the adult population, as he knew that they would either just kick his ass for nothing at all, or probably boss him around demanding he do things he really didn't want to. He eyed the man in front of him with utmost suspicion whilst he ate. The man was just wearing that stupid smile all throughout. Though he was thankful that he had food to eat, if this man acted in a manner that would piss him off, then he'd make a break for it.

Renji decided he'd ask questions after he finished eating, but he didn't know the blond man would beat him to it.

"What's your name?"

"Renji."

The blond man looked at him some more before resuming. "What do you say if I asked you to live at my place? I could train you to fight. Not only that, you'll have a roof over your head and you don't have to worry about food."

The boy looked at him like he had grown another head. "What's in it fer me?"

"Nothing."

"Yer fuckin' wit me, aren't ya?"

"Nope."

Renji just could not tell if the man was telling him a load of crap or not. But the sound of having somewhere safe and warm to sleep in, as well as a continuous supply of food was totally tempting. He didn't have to steal or look in the garbage for something edible. He didn't have to sleep on the cold hard concrete anymore! Yet he was a bit nervous. He knew that something good like this was too good to be true… and the person offering it would always ask for something in return.

"Tell me why I don' fucking believe ev'ry damn thing ya say." Renji said as he glowered at the man.

Kisuke sighed. Oh well. He couldn't exactly force the boy to do as he said, after all it was just some crazy idea born out of sheer, probably short term, fascination.

"Then if you change your mind, you can come and see me at this address… or you can call the number." Kisuke gave him a white call card. "You know, if you really think about it, you could be so much more than this, that's why I'm offering you this chance."

"Whatever, old man." The boy said without looking at the blond man.

A few days had gone by, though Renji was still wishing he took the offer, he could not bring himself to trust the man. They always want something in return. Besides, he had a lot of pride in him, that boy. He wouldn't ask for help, not even when his life depended on it.

One very stormy and fucking cold afternoon, so cold it seeped through his bones, he took shelter under one flimsy sheet of tarpaulin he found in the garbage dump in an alley. He guessed he had fallen asleep while sitting on his haunches when he suddenly didn't feel the soft thumping of raindrops on him. Turned out he was being shielded under an umbrella, a rather large one, by none other than Kisuke Urahara himself.

"Hey kitten, I think it's better if you come with me."

The boy very reluctantly stood up, though still clutching that bit of tarp around him protectively. He just couldn't take the cold any longer. He then felt a hand on the small of his back, guiding him toward a small parking lot. The older man led him toward a nondescript black car with moderately tinted windows.

Kisuke opened the passenger's seat first. "Come on, get in kitten."

The boy weakly glowered at him then said, "It's not kitten, it's Renji."

The blond man chuckled. "Okay then, Renji it is. And yeah, you could get rid of this now." he said, pointing to the tarp. The boy merely nodded, then dropped it where he was standing and got into the car.

The blond man was feeling awfully good at this point. But he was no pedophile, no sirree. He was just doing what any man in his position would do, which was to help a homeless boy, albeit a good looking one at that. He briefly wondered what the legal age in Japan was. Was it 13? Or was it 15? After realizing what he was thinking of, Kisuke inwardly cringed. He was no fucking pedophile, dammit. (Insert flailing limbs and shaking fists here)

After driving for thirty minutes, they finally reached a three storey building. By then, the storm had abated; though the sky was still overcast, threatening to spill some more rain. Kisuke alighted from the car first, then lit a cigarette. He proceeded to open the door for the kid, but Renji had already alighted from the car.

"Welcome to my home, kitten." The blond man cheerfully said.

The boy remained where he was, standing right beside the car. He really didn't know what to think.

"Well, kitten, are you just going to stand there for the rest of the day, or shall we go inside?"

The boy glared at the man for calling him "kitten" once more, but he grudgingly walked toward the front door anyway as the blond man walked ahead of him, in a lackadaisical manner.

The room they entered was sparsely furnished. Just padded bench situated against one wall, a console with a vase and a lamp against another and in the middle of this all was a large full length mirror. On either side of the mirror were a couple of doorframes which led to the main living areas.

The boy scanned his surroundings. It might not have been as impressive as he imagined but he immediately felt the warmth and hominess of the place. But he was still guarded. Ya never know…

"I'm home!" the blond man greeted nobody in particular as he made his way toward the living room. He could smell something cooking. Tessai must be cooking his specialty beef stew again. He felt his stomach grumble. He noticed the boy did not follow him. He sighed. This would definitely take some time.

"Oh kitten! Where are you now~" he said loudly in his most annoying sing song voice, though he knew full well where the boy was.

"Dammit, it's not fuckin' kitten, my fuckin' name is Renji!" the boy huffed as he entered the living room. The blond man noted the flush on the boy's cheeks and thought it was really cute on him. Oh damn, did he just think that? It dawned on him that this was going downhill fast.

Tessai was in the kitchen cooking dinner when Urahara and his visitor arrived. The man was slightly disturbed by the racket his boss was making. He wondered who Urahara was with. He then took a peek and was surprised when he saw the teenage boy. He knew his boss was sometimes eccentric and unpredictable, but this exceeded the limit.

Upstairs, in the bedroom, Yoruichi and Soi Fon were just about to go from hot to hot and heavy when both women heard the blond man's loud and annoying sing song voice.

"Oh god, he just had to arrive and ruin the mood." The dark skinned woman groaned, her hand stuck somewhere wet, warm and oh so inviting. Soi could only just whimper in response, her lover's hand had stopped moving, when she needed it so badly.

"Don't mind the idiot. Come on let's finish this…" the smaller female nearly begged, tightening her legs around Yoruichi's waist and her forearm in between them. The dark skinned woman grinned madly and dove for her lover's lips in a passionate kiss as her hand squelched and started thrusting those sinful fingers in her once more.

Soi Fon was so close she could taste it, when both women were startled by a knock on the door. It was Tessai.

"Miss Soi, Miss Yoruichi, dinner is ready." The man said beyond the door.

Soi was flushed, horny and pissed. She so fucking close and everyone just had to ruin the damn mood. This did not go unnoticed by her lover. The dark skinned woman lay on her side, head propped up by one hand. She was grinning amusedly, though she herself was by no means not amused by what's going on downstairs.

"We're coming," Yoruichi said, though she just had to smirk at her own words.

Ten minutes later, the pair entered the dining room only to see a blushing teenage boy, the flippant Urahara teasing the said boy and the stoic Tessai already eating already. Both women sat side by side. Yoruichi, more than Soi, was expecting some sort of explanation why they have a sulking brat in their midst. Yet the dark skinned woman expected no better from Urahara, after all she had known him since they were eight years old. She would have to wait until after dinner then.

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A/N: I just couldn't resist taking a detour from the main story line. Honestly, I'm still planning on what will happen next with Stark and Ichigo, and also, since I didn't want any questions (that were probably raised in the previous chapters) to go unanswered. And I'm also sorry that this chapter ended rather lamely, I just couldn't find the right, well, ending to it. Please don't hate me.

And I really have no idea where that yuri smut came from, but I do know that I wanted some smut in this chapter, though not as hardcore as the previous ones. XD

Anyway, don't forget to tell me what you think.

PS: Has anyone read the latest Bleach chapter lately? Yammy as the goddamn Espada 0? I honestly have no idea where Kubo sensei gets his ideas from.