Title:Game Without Tears
Disclaimer: I do not own, wish I did, but I don't. I only own my plot line. Full disclaimer, first chapter. The song is from the end of the Care Bears Movie II.
Author: ShaeLynn Teelle
All other information: See first chapter.
Polite constructive criticism welcome. FLAMES WILL BE FED TO THE DRAGON IN MY BED.
Chapter 15: Your Secrets Will Keep
Snape turned and glared at Harry, "I noticed Potter leaving the school and I followed. He deemed that his mission was important enough to ignore any and all precautions that were taken for his safety."
"I was looking for Death Eaters. If they came onto the grounds once, they could have easily done so twice and instead of sitting around and waiting for them to find me and take me to Voldemort—"
"DON'T SAY HIS NAME!" Snape yelled.
"I decided to go and look for VOLDEMORT on my own!"
"Why do you people never listen to anything?" Draco interrupted angrily, realizing that the two were about to start another of their rows right in front of the Headmaster and Draco didn't want to hear it. "Exactly why did you think to look for Death Eaters near Hogwarts, Potter? Surely you didn't expect to find Voldemort just sitting around near the Forbidden Forest waiting for you to chance upon him."
"I went looking for the Death Eater that hurt Hermione," Harry answered calmly, watching Draco closely when a flash of disbelief crossed his face.
"What do you…" Draco looked at Hermione, shock evident on his face. "You never told anyone?"
"I told Professor Dumbledore. Wait… how do you know about that?" Hermione's eyes widened in understanding, "It was you!"
"What?" Ron shouted as he stood.
In the few seconds it took for Ron to reach the edge of Draco's bed Draco managed to swear and resign himself to his fate of being burned alive by Ron's hatred for him. "Oh, bloody hell, there was a reason you were supposed to tell them the truth, Hermione!"
Hearing Draco call his girlfriend by her first name made Ron pause long enough for Hermione to cast the Petrifying spell on her hot-tempered boyfriend before he could touch Draco again.
"I'm sorry, Draco. You do realize that things got very hectic very quickly after that. There just never seemed to be a good time to tell them."
"What do you consider a good time to tell your friends that you lied to them about something like that? When one of them is just about to try to kill me? You just tell them!" Draco snapped at Hermione, eyes wide as his adrenaline from Ron's near attack transferred into anger at her.
"Well, Mr. Malfoy, as she did stop him before he reached you I would say that it is better late than never for the truth to come out. Miss Granger, I believe this would be your story to tell."
"Yes, Headmaster," she looked at those assembled in apology. "Professors, Harry, Ron, I lied about part of what happened when I was captured. I was tortured and Voldemort's right hand Death Eater did stop him just before he was going to kill me. I told you what he said and that he dragged me into a side room, but he never raped me. I screamed and he told me to keep screaming or we'd both be killed. Then, he did some simple magic so it appeared that he'd raped me and I played my part by screaming so Voldemort and the other Death Eaters would believe what they thought had happened. Draco saved my life and basically tricked Voldemort into returning me to Hogwarts."
"Are you sure it was Malfoy, Hermione?" Harry asked quietly.
"The only Death Eater that knew about what happened and that it wasn't real would be the one who did it. The only other way to be sure would be to hear that voice. There was no distinction so it could have been anyone's voice, but it was so cold, so empty. I've never heard anyone who could make their voice so hollow. Even Voldemort's voice couldn't make me feel a chill all the way to my bones."
"I'm sorry, Hermione, but I won't believe that he was the one to save you without proof. I believe you about what you say happened because I trust you, but I've never trusted him. And I'm not going to start until he or someone else can prove it completely," Harry said quietly, eyes hard as he glared at Draco across the room.
"I wouldn't expect you to, Potter. There are things that I could never expect you to do. Trusting me is at the top of the list, just below you willingly helping Voldemort."
Draco turned his head as far away from the group as he could in his restricted state and closed his eyes, not wanting to see or hear anymore. He didn't want to feel the hatred and distrust circling about the room. Draco closed his mind off so completely that he never noticed when Hermione released Ron and the Gryffindor returned quietly to her side, not doing anything to Draco.
He also didn't notice it when Severus tried to get his attention by repeatedly calling his name, each time a little louder and more frustrated than the last. He did take notice however when he felt a pressure against his cloth covered leg.
"Do not touch me."
Dumbledore took a slight step backwards at the sound of his voice and the cold, dead tone he had slipped into. Hermione gasped in shock and shivered as she once again felt chills straight to her bones. Ron's mouth fell open in surprise as he recognized the voice and he glanced at Remus who just watched Draco with narrowed eyes.
"Is there anything that will reverse the burns, Mr. Malfoy?" Dumbledore asked, a frown on his face and the twinkle absent from his eyes.
"The touch of someone that holds no hatred or anger towards me. Unfortunately, the only ones capable of that are currently under Voldemort's watchful eyes and my mother is dead."
"Because you killed her."
"Harry!" Hermione exclaimed, shocked that he would be able to say something with so little feeling. She was even less prepared to hear Draco's answer, his voice still cold and unfeeling.
"Yes. We both knew this would happen when Voldemort returned. The only person that seemed unaware of the consequences of his actions was Lucius himself. The past cannot be changed and when one knows the direction their life will take, few are willing to change that if the alternative is worse."
Draco hadn't noticed how late in the day it was when he had awoken and the turns the conversation had taken since then had kept his attention away from the setting sun. He refused to look at anyone as he spoke, keeping his mind as far from what was happening as he did when he was within Voldemort's presence. Then, a new voice spoke, one that broke through all his defenses without even trying.
"Komodo, there is no need for that. As I taught you, one cannot change the past. Do not dwell so deeply on regrets."
The other occupants of the room could only stare as a figure began to coalesce next to Draco's bed on the opposite side as Dumbledore. Everyone had seen her at least once, even if it was just her picture in the Daily Prophet and no one in the room doubted that the ghost before them was Narcissa Malfoy. As they watched, she sat on the bed and placed her hand lightly on Draco's cheek. Hermione and Ron shivered slightly, remembering their brief encounters with a ghost's touch. But Draco didn't pull away as they expected, nor did he seem surprised at all that the ghost of his mother was there.
"What's happening?" Draco asked so quietly that if there had been any noise in the room only Narcissa would have heard him, but no one in the infirmary was making a sound and everyone heard their conversation.
"He has punished Greg and Vin already, but they are still alive. Pans and Daph… you already know what he will do with them. We can only hope that they are strong enough to survive his punishments."
Draco's face was still turned away from the occupants of the room so none of them saw the single tear that slipped out from the corner of his eye, but they all heard that his voice had changed from the cold tone to the normal one he spoke in, "They will. Both of them are strong. Stronger than me or they would not have survived for so long already. And they both have more to live for than most that have been in their place."
"And what of you, Komodo?"
"It's over. He'll find me and kill me whether he kills the others or not. It wasn't supposed to end this soon."
"Would you have rather it ended after Potter had died? Would that have been a better way for your betrayal to happen," Narcissa asked, her tone not changing, but it still made the occupants of the room believe that she was getting angry.
"No, but now he'll come after you and he'll find out that the pledge I made him to show my loyalty is something that could never happen. Then, he'll go after the others again and there's nothing I can do now to stop him."
Harry glanced over at Severus on his bed, not saying anything. Severus had a severe look of concentration on his face. Ron was wearing a typically confused look on his face while Hermione's face showed that she was confused as well, but was taking in everything that was said. Dumbledore's face gave nothing away about what he was thinking, the twinkle in his eyes was still absent and Remus was quietly watching the interaction between the ghost and her son. Harry turned his attention back to Draco and Narcissa.
"You already know that Greg and Vin will protect Pans and Daph with their lives. And even when Voldemort does try to get at me in revenge he will have the absolute shock of his life. Then, he will go after Lucius for never telling him about me instead of wasting his time with the others," Narcissa said, a light smile crossing her pale lips.
Draco laughed quietly, but it was unlike any laugh any living person in the room had ever heard from him before. This laugh was light and open as though whatever the cause was, Draco truly found humorous without any need for it to be malicious.
"And Lucius never had any clue as to what you really are. He's going to have a fit when he finds out that there were two of us right under his nose and he didn't take advantage of it from simple ignorance."
"About that. You have been requested for a meeting with your oldest ancestor when you are allowed to return to your rooms and she arrives. She believed that what she needed to talk to you about was better discussed in private. And I believe that there are going to be many questions asked soon," Narcissa turned towards Albus when she was finished speaking.
"Good evening, Narcissa. Is there anything you would like to tell me?"
Harry had to stop himself from laughing out loud as Dumbledore asked the question that he had often posed to Harry when he knew that he was keeping something from him. Narcissa did not even try to curb her laughter at the question.
"Albus, you have been trying to get me to answer that question since my second year here. Perhaps it is time that I inform both you and Severus of what I am and what my Komodo Dragon is. You have, I trust, heard of Morgana le Fay."
Both Hermione gasped and Snape's eyes narrowed as Dumbledore simply nodded in reply. Hermione then dragged Ron over to Harry's bed where the two sat down on the edge, listening to what was being said.
"As I'm sure you are also aware, Morgana was Merlin's teacher while he allowed her. The story of Merlin being of blood relation to Morgana and then, he was her lover before he found out and that's why he no longer had nothing to do with her is completely false. Morgana was not related to Merlin in any way, shape, or form. She saved his life when he was born and took him in because she could sense the opportunity for an apprentice in him. They were never lovers at any stage.
"Merlin simply began to see that some things Morgana did were not for the good of anyone, but instead was what he first called Black Magic. This later was changed to be called the Dark Arts. At the time it was only used in reference to spells that could kill instantly or were only used for the intents of torture or completely controlling another person.
"Many of the spells and potions that are now considered under the heading of Dark Arts, were never considered as such because they were created with a completely different purpose in mind. It was through creative thinking over the centuries that led to the current uses of these spells and potions today.
"Morgana used spells as they became necessary. She created spells for something she wanted or needed to do, but had no spells to do them yet. Merlin confronted her when she created the Cruciatus curse. It was used as a form of torture at the time, but it was to extract information from Muggles and wizards alike when they betrayed the one they had sworn their allegiance to. She only used it for seconds at a time, sometimes a minute at most. It was used to kill only once.
"An apprentice she had taken, after Merlin had grown and left to lead his own life, tried to kill her. She used the curse to find out why and what he hoped to gain from killing her when the apprentice was still no more than a child. The apprentice told her that someone had offered a lot of gold for the head of Morgana and her sister, the one they often called the Lady of the Lake.
"The Lady had already been killed, but the news had not reached Morgana until her apprentice told her. In her anger and grief over the loss of her sister, she used the curse to kill the traitor. Merlin went to her to demand an explanation, but she wouldn't tell him. She wanted to be able to solve the situation on her own without outside interference. He killed her and thinking that would be the end of the line, he left all her possessions and written manuscripts of her spells in the caves that she called home. He sealed the only entrance he knew of and left, never to return.
"What he didn't know was that Morgana was already old when she had saved his life as a newborn though she didn't look it. She had a son and two daughters that each had their own entrance into the caves and their own brands of powerful magic. I can have Draco translate the history from that point on if you would like to know the rest Albus, but I won't bore you with anymore details. Suffice it to say that the children got revenge for their mother's murder, though two of them were killed shortly afterwards.
"The remaining girl fled the land with everything of value that was left within the caves and made a new home for herself far enough away from the English Isle that Merlin's apprentices never found her again. Eventually her descendants returned to England when there was no one left that would know them and made a new home here, keeping Morgana's secrets safe.
"This gift I hold, and Draco carries as well, is only present in certain members of our family. The magic and gifts we received are only given to some members of the family based on a family member's soul. I was the only one of my sisters with the gift and my grandmother was the only one in hers that had the gift. There were accounts where this circumstance skipped as many as three generations before manifesting again.
"I do not know what it is about a person that allows the gift to inherit and there has been no records of it either. I am a descendant of that line through my mother. And, as Draco is my son, my Komodo is also a descendant of Morgana, and as a descendant with this gift he will never have more than a single child.
"I know of the rumors regarding the appearance and disappearance of the ghost of Morgana throughout the complete wizarding history since, but the rumors regarding why she has been seen are wrong. Morgana's spirit can never die. It can never cross over or be destroyed. She can be seen, just as any other ghost, by anyone day or night.
"However, she can control her spirit just as if she were alive. She can become completely solid so no one knows whether she is real or not. That is part of the rumors. The rest is that she can still do magic, even as a spirit. That is true. She can do everything she could in life, with the added benefits of not being able to die.
"As her descendant, my spirit can never cross over, be destroyed, or be possessed by anyone. The descendants can do everything that she can do as a spirit, though we can only be seen after the sun goes down. I always thought my great aunt was very strange before I learned about my ancestry. She never slept at night. She slept during the day and was awake only for several hours before sunset and several hours after sunrise. She would invite all her ancestors to visit her and she spent seventy-five years of her life copying down the individual histories of every ancestor that came to visit her. There were several that never came, but there is always some like that in every family.
"Draco swore his loyalty to Voldemort on my soul. He knew what he was doing as I had gone through every history my great aunt possessed to determine what would happen. Voldemort will literately get the shock of his life when he tries to obtain my soul for my Komodo's betrayal. It will be a very interesting sight to see. Now, Headmaster, is there anything you wish to tell me?"
There was complete silence in the room as all assembled took in Narcissa's words.
"Draco's loyalties are to the Light. Only to the Light, but what about the other Slytherins?"
"Headmaster," Draco began when his mother looked to him for the answer. "There are only two seventh year Slytherins that owe their loyalties to the Snake. Nott and Bulstrode. Most of the rest are marked, but they are spies like me. We worked together to gather the information that I have sent you since the beginning of my service to the Snake, but now he has them as prisoners, as traitors. I do not know if they will manage to survive or not. Only one man managed to survive the Snake's punishment for being a traitor and he has not made the job of keeping him that way any easier."
"What are you talking about, Mr. Malfoy?" Snape asked from his side of the infirmary.
"Do you really think that when the Snake discovered you had survived that he would allow you to do so? I took over your former position as the Potion Maker for the Snake, but I have a great deal left to learn to get to the level you are at and you would be the only one competent enough to teach me what I would need to know. With the pledge I made at my initiation, the Snake never even thought to question my true intentions," Draco answered quietly, not looking his professor in the eye.
"In other words, Severus, Draco kept you alive by making the Snake believe that you were still useful to have around. You owe your life to him," Narcissa said, staring at Severus.
"I will not be in a wizard's debt to a Malfoy."
"You are in a double wizard's debt, Severus. Don't forget who got you out of Voldemort's chambers. It wasn't Harry, or yourself."
"I—"
"Now, Severus, perhaps we should save this conversation for another time. It is after midnight and I'm sure that Poppy would like to have her patients asleep before morning. Everyone, I think it best that we all leave. We will continue with any questions you may have tomorrow morning, especially as it is Saturday and a Hogsmeade weekend," Albus said and ushered everyone out of the infirmary, letting Poppy deal with keeping Severus quiet and asleep, but when she insisted Narcissa leave, she was told in no uncertain terms that the spirit would not be leaving until the first rays of the sun crept over the horizon.
\/ \/ \/ \/ \/
It was several hours later when Harry awoke to a soft noise that seemed to echo about the infirmary. It only took a moment to realize that it was a woman's voice, lightly crooning a song. Her voice was light, but pure and Harry couldn't stop the gentle smile that upturned the edges of his lips. He looked down the row of beds and saw that Severus was also awake and, though he didn't smile, there was gentleness in his eyes.
Harry silently sat up and reached for his glasses. When he had them on he looked across the infirmary to where Draco's bed was. He blinked his eyes hard, but when they opened again, the image before him had not changed.
Draco sat on his bed, his knees bent to his chest and his good arm was folded over them. His head was buried against his arm and his shoulders were shaking heavily. The burned arm hung limply at his side, only the shoulder shifting with the rest of him. Harry was dimly aware that he could now hear the harsh sobs that Draco was trying to muffle with his arms. Narcissa had her arms wrapped about Draco's shoulders as he cried and it was then that Harry realized the soft singing was coming from her.
"…it always will. My wishing star, has guided all you do. My empty heart you fill. We still feel forever young," her words faded until she was only humming the melody.
Then, Draco's quiet voice broke into the peace and for a moment Harry was resentful of the interruption, "I'm sorry, Mum."
"Don't be sorry, Komodo. You cannot control these nightmares and I do not know of any way to help you. They should not be affecting you more now than when it happened."
"They won't go away. I just keep seeing it, every time I close my eyes I can see him standing there ordering me to hurt you, to kill you. Why won't they go away?! I know what I did. I'll never forget what happened, but these memories just keep tormenting me! Why?!" Draco exclaimed and turned over, burying his face into his pillow and wrapping his good arm about it while the blackened one was pulled over him to lay at his side.
Narcissa sat on the edge of his bed, her eyes closed and a look of intense pain across her face. Then, her spirit began to cry tears of silver, each one sparkling in the faint light as they slipped down her pale cheeks. Her hands clenched in her lap for a moment before she placed one lightly on Draco's back, drawing Harry and Snape's attention to the Slytherins sobbing form once more.
"I'm sorry, my Komodo. I'm so sorry. None of this should have ever happened. I've never been able to protect you enough from Lucius and now he's ensured that the only comfort I could ever offer has been taken away. Draco, I'm sorry I've abandoned you to this world and this fate. I long wished I could have taken your place in this fight."
"It's not your fault, Mum. It's Lucius' fault. It's my fault. If I had been stronger; if I could have killed the Snake that night; if I had more courage—"
"Komodo, I do not want to hear that from you. It's not your fault. You did what you had to in order to survive with the life you were given. We both knew this from before the second rising. No matter how strong you could get, you would not have been able to destroy him. You know that there is a prophecy. You know that you are not the one it is about. You would never have been able to destroy him.
"Komodo, you have the most courage of anyone I have ever met. You and Severus both have more courage than any Gryffindor I've heard of. It takes courage to go against an enemy stronger than yourself, yes. And Harry has that courage in spades. But to be able to go in front of that enemy, lie to his face time and time again without flinching, without letting up your mask of loyalty… That takes more courage than you know.
"That is something that many will never know. They will never know the fear every calling as you wonder if this will be the last call, if you have been discovered. They'll never know the relief every time you managed to escape the meeting alive and without having to torture an innocent, though it wounds you that you couldn't save even one. That takes more courage than you realize, my Komodo Dragon. And that is something you have enough of to get you through anything that he can throw at you now. Just keep believing in yourself and in what you know. There are secrets there and hidden strengths that will save you when all is said and done."
Draco turned his head and looked at his mother, eyes red from his tears and gave her a tremulous smile, "Your faith in me is one of the few things that has given me the courage to do what I've done. You, Mum, and very little else."
"Thank you, Komodo. It is nearly dawn. Get some sleep. I'm sure the others will be fine and I will return as soon as I can."
"Good-bye, Mum," Draco said and watched as Narcissa's spirit faded away just as the first ray of sunlight rose above the horizon.
Draco silently watched the sun rise from the infirmary window near his bed. His face was tear-stained, his eyes puffy and red, but it didn't seem to bother him. After nearly five minutes of watching the sun rise, Draco curled up on his side and fell asleep. He never noticed Harry and Snape as they watched him, nor was he aware that they had been watching him the entire time. The two returned to their own interrupted sleep, each with varying thoughts of confusion about what else they had never known about the Slytherin leader.
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