To My Darling Nessie,
Its coming up to Christmas, I bet your excited huh? Christmas is our favourite time of year together, and has been for... well.. since you where born really. The best thing about christmas is going round to Charlies, Even though he doesn't actually cook Christmas dinner.. which is a good thing as he's cooking is TERRIBLE!!
I'm so glad him and Sue found each other, she makes EXCELLENT christmas dinner! Me, Sam, the packs, Bells, even Edward at Christmas times! Billy, And of course, most importantly.. You my love, Christmas is a time to be shared with loved ones, and all i keep thinking about, wondering and hoping, is that your father decides to come to forks for Christmas with you and Bells, because that would make my whole life, Just to see you, if only for a day.. and i am hopeful for it too, i have a good feeling about it.
I don't think Bella would not want to see Charlie at christmas, and i do not think she would want to deprive you of that right either! So yes, i am excited for Christmas, and i hope your enjoying your christmas excitement as much as i am. I often wonder if you go to school, wherever you are in the world right now, do you have friends? do boys take large interest in you and your beauty? do you ever wonder if it would be easier to forget about me and be with someone else? I hope you have made friends, no doubt you would have, your so special and people can't help but be warmed by you. I am also hoping that You HAVENT let those boys have TOO much interest in you... Remember our promise baby. I Love You. See you at Christmas.
My Deepest Love Always,
Jacob Xxx
Dear Renesmee,
I AM SO FUCKING ENRAGED RIGHT NOW!!! I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT ANGER WAS UNTIL THIS MOMENT IN TIME!!! YOUR FATHER IS AN IDOIT AND YOUR MOTHER IS A DAMNED FOOL FOR PROBABLY TAKING HIS SIDE!!! Its the 25th Decemember.. and its the middle of the afternoon, and therefore it is pretty obvious your not coming, i also had it confirmed by Charlie and Sue.... Do you know how embarressing that was?! i was staring at the door, and he sighed, patted my shoulder and said 'their not coming, i'm so sorry.' I could have gone ape shit and phased right there! right there!! i bet it was your Father, going on all alpha male like he does... 'No, Renesmee, i will not have you seeing that mutt for christmas,blah blah blahh.' and i can see your mother, a woman i once called my best friend nodding and agreeing with him. 'i think it would be best honey blah blahh blah' URGH!! just thinking about it is annoying the hell out of me, i had to get out of Charlies house, down to La Push and go for a run for a while, because if i didn't i would end up hurting somebody, and that is something i do not want darling,espesically the people we both love. I'm just.. GRR! I was just really looking forward to seeing you this christmas.. and i really thought that this time i would DEFFIANTLY see you, i had a gut feeling, and i'm so pissed off that i got myself into that state. That i led myself to believe this christmas i would have you in my arms again. I am so stupid. URGH. Another reason i had to leave is that Leah, well.. believe it or not, me and the pack think she has imprinted, she seems to have anyway, and shes laughing, and is actually happy with someone else, instead of drowning us in her thoughts of sam.. which would be a relief if it wasn't so sickening. His name is Sean, and he seems like an alright kid. I don't think he knows anything about the werewolf side of things yet, but if she really has imprinted then i'm sure it won't be long before the boy gets let into the mad and chaotic world. Oh God, i've just relised right now. I am now going to be the annoyance of the pack, everyone is already fed up of my grievance for you.. Just like we were of Leah's and now she is happy, everyone is going to see my grievance much more than hers. I hate this. PLEASE COME BACK NESSIE. I promised i would wait for you, and i have waited for too long now.
Happy Christmas,
Jacob Xxx
