Disclaimer: I own nothing
Chapter 4: Guilty Pleasure
After four hours of playing clue, B.S., Scene it, Urban Myth, Are you smarter than a fifth grader, and boxer or briefs, I knew a lot more about Bella than I ever thought I'd learn over a couple board games. Her favorite color was green. She loved Jane Austen and Mr. Darcy. She believed in Big foot and wished she was a vampire. I also thought she must be a descendant of Einstein because she was way smarter than a fifth grader. Note to self: she prefers guys who wear boxers and she thinks guys who wear speedos are either really egoistic or completely gay.
And I was falling for her. Hard. I've only known her a couple days but she was so amazing. And I never should have tried to convince myself that it was only the forbidden quality of that would-be relationship that intrigued me. As soon as I realized this I quickly made up an excuse about having to go visit people today. I didn't specify. But I wasn't lying. I really needed to talk to Alice about my current... situation. I helped Emmett and Bella pick up a bit before telling them goodbye and hurrying to get in the Volvo. I sped toward Alice and Rosalie's apartment.
As soon as I was in front of their door a banged on it with my fist as loud as I could. When Rosalie opened the door I stormed in and asked where Alice was.
"She's in the kitchen. What are you doing here?" She asked, confused.
"I need to talk to Alice." I told her firmly.
"Okay. You don't have to bite her head off. Jeez!" Alice exclaimed jokingly from the other side of the room. She walked over to me and grabbed my hand. "Come on," she said and led me to her bedroom. She shut the door behind her and sat next to me on the bed. "So what's going on, Eddie?" She was the only one allowed to call me that. If anyone else called me that I really would bite their head off. Okay, not really but I'd still kick their ass.
"I have an issue with Emmett," I told her as I picked at her comforter- ashamed at what I was about to tell her.
"What kind of issue?" she asked curiously.
"The kind where you want to kick your best friend's ass because he got the girl," I said hurriedly.
"What?"
"I-uh.. I have a slight crush on Bella." I told her more calmly.
"Doesn't everyone," she said with a shrug. "I don't see how that justifies you storming in like a crazy lunatic."
"Yes, I know everyone likes her. But um, maybe I downplayed my feelings a bit." She immediately sat up straighter and her gaze narrowed.
"How much did you downplay?" She asked tensely.
I hesitated a bit but then looked up at her and said "A lot."
She got up and started pacing. She kept at it for a few more minutes before stopping abruptly and looking over at me.
"Have you told Bella how you feel about her?"
"Hell no. She'd slap me and tell Emmett and then he'd kill me."
She laughed lightly quickly regained her seriousness and said, "I think you should."
"What? Why? Are you that eager to attend my funeral?" I yelled at her, astonished.
"No, I just think she has a right to know why you won't be hanging around her anymore. Besides I wouldn't have to attend your funeral anyway because you already decided you wanted to be cremated, remember?" She said with a small smile.
"I just don't to be rotting away in a stupid coffin. They're for vampires not dead people." She immediately burst out in laughter.
"Edward, you do realize vampires are dead people, don't you!?!" she laughed
"Well, yeah but they're still alive. They can move and talk and stuff," I defended myself.
"Whatever, vampires don't even live in coffins anyway." She huffed
"Bram Stoker says they do," I taunted her.
"Oh whatever. I say Stephenie Meyer is right and you need to tell Bella then never see her again."
"Fine I'll tell her but I don't see why I can't still talk to her after that," I fumed.
"Because it would be bad for the both of you. She'd feel awkward all the time and you'd never get the chance to get over her."
As I was driving home, going 35 in a 65 speed zone, I couldn't think of anything but what Alice told me. I knew I couldn't do it. I couldn't just not see Bella. So I decided that I would try to just forget about her now so that I wouldn't have to tell her and I wouldn't have to stop seeing her. With my mind set I entered my parent's house, praying they weren't home. After calling their name several times and coming to the conclusion they weren't home I flipped my phone open and dialed Tanya's number. She was always fun in the bedroom. If anyone could make me forget about Bella it would be her.
I closed the door behind Tanya and leaned my against the door. I'm so fucked. No pun attended. It didn't work. The whole time I was with Tanya I kept picturing Bella underneath me. Kept picturing me doing the things to Bella that I was actually doing to Tanya. Alice was right, I had to talk to Bella. Hopefully she'll punch me or something. That would make it so much for me. Because after I talk to her, I won't be able to see her again.
The next morning I had to go to town and get because I needed to work on one of my thesis papers and I've always loved to go to Border's to work because it was always quiet. Plus if you needed a break you read a good book, listen to music, or get a coffee and one of those giant cookies. I had been there for about an hour and a half when I finally decided to get me one of those cookies and a french vanilla latte. Sorta girly but whatever. What I didn't expect was to see Bella behind the counter.
"Oh! Hey, Edward," she waved at me when I stepped up to tell her my order.
"Uh-Hi Bella. I didn't know you worked here."
"Well I only work her during the summer and a couple times during the school year." she said matter-of-factly. I suddenly remember her telling me she was a high school English teacher after she beat me and Emmett at all three games of 'Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader'. "So, um, what would you like?" And since I couldn't tell her what I'd really like right now I simply told her I wanted my French vanilla latte and giant cookie. I paid and then walked back over to my seat after grabbing my latte and cookie and telling her goodbye.
How was I suppose to tell her. Maybe I could figure out when she had a break and tell her then. No it was to impersonal. But I was going to have to tell her soon. I just needed to figure out what I would tell her when I did. All I knew is that I need to stay away from her as much as I can until I figure out what to do. Because the more I was around her the more I realized how amazing she was and how possible it is to fall in love with my best friend's girl.
