Disclaimer : I don't own it. I also don't own the Underarm Deoderant (Degree for Men?) Commercial.
Note : Requested by Savior Angel. Look up Caramelldansen on youtube, and think of the Autobots dancing in their place, and you'll laugh your afts off for sure! LMAO! P.S. I thoroughly suggest watching the video, and the lyrics are translated, so this IS how they sound in the song (and the site I got the lyrics from).
Starfire201 - Oh yeah, I forgot about Hound for a minute there. LOL! Yeah I'm sure he's got a pretty big target on his aft, too. LOL Nothing shall stop the pranks! NOTHING! *watches as her muse takes a soaring nosedive off the nearest cliff, to land with a bloody, painful death at the bottom of the cliff* ...Except maybe that. O.o
(Mikeala's POV)
As I set up my living room, I looked around and sighed happily. This was a nice, semi-normal way to relax, and I was thoroughly planning to enjoy it. Bending down, I grunted a little as I shoved the coffee table back out of the way, before placing a few thick, padded mats on the ground in it's place, lining one up next to the other. By the time I was done, it almost looked like a gym, which was the exact feeling I was going for.
The rumble of a familiar engine filled the air, and I slipped the DVD into the player, setting it up before pausing it and walking over to the door.
"Sarah. Maggie." I grinned at the girls, before waving at Ironhide as he pulled out, watching the gruff 'driver' wave back briefly before continuing on. "Well, he's as grouchy as ever."
"Late night." Sarah rolled her eyes as she walked in, Maggie in tow. "Apparently his sensors picked up movement by Anna's window, and he transformed and blasted the damned thing." She glared a little. "And woke my baby up over a luna moth."
"Poor moth." Maggie snickered, before patting Sarah awkwardly with her free hand. "Now, where do I put these down?" She gestured to the tray of caffinated gold she was holding, from the local Tim Hortons.
"Right here." I closed the door and grabbed the largest ice cap, as usual, grinning as Sarah quickly grabbed her large french vanilla ice cap, and Maggie her butter caramel. "Yum." I took a sip, then paused. "You know, these probably cancel out our morning workouts."
"I don't care." Sarah added in, slipping off her shoes and carefully pulling off her jacket. "I could weight three hundred pounds and be unable to move, and I wouldn't care. I want my Timmies!"
"Gimme my Timmies and you won't get hurt." Maggie snickered in her thickly accented voice, her blue eyes sparkling with laughter as she took a sip. "Ratch learned that the hard way."
Sarah was sipping her drink, and almost choked on it before giggling and nodding. "Oh, I saw. He refused to take Maggie by Timmies, and Xena here threatened to kick out his windows if he didn't. In the end, he took her alright, but ditched her in the parking lot."
"Good thing Ironhide was nearby." The blonde hacker grinned as we walked into the living room. "I promised him a good wash later for giving me a ride."
Placing her drink on the table, Sarah looked at the video with a grin. "Oh Lord, what do you think the boys would think if they knew...?" She gestured to the picture frozen on the screen.
I took a quick look and laughed. "More. Please."
"Don't stop." Maggie added with a nod, placing her own drink down as she removed her jacket.
"Swing those hips!"
"I'm gonna sleep well tonight."
"Oh. My. God!"
"Thank you God!"
"Hell yeah!"
I doubled over laughing at Maggie's waggle of the eyebrows, and watched as she and Sarah began stretching. We were all dressed in our workout clothes, consisting of slightly baggy jogging pants, and light tank tops. As I joined them, we began stretching, and spent the next ten minutes doing that before actually starting.
As I played the video, and we danced to specially choreographed moves, I paused in the middle and stared uncomprehendingly at the anime girls dancing on the screen, as perhaps the weirdest idea I'd ever had came over me. They were more or less just bouncing in place and swaying their hips as they went. Luckily our moves were more complex, but I had the sudden vision of... Doubling up laughing, I couldn't tear my eyes away from the screen, as much as I dearly wanted to.
"What? What??"
Shaking my head, I stood up straight and took a deep breath. I was about to open my mouth to tell them, when a rumble of an engine, and a loud honk was heard. "Wha-He's early." Turning, I led the way to the door and opened it as Ironhide's holoform came rushing over.
"We gotta go. There's been a strange signal in the area that no one recognizes."
"Is it a threat?" I crossed my arms over my chest. After all, he hadn't said it was a Decepticon signal, and Ironhide usually differentiated verbally for us.
"It doesn't matter, woman!" He spat, grabbing Sarah by the arm. "We gotta go. I'm taking my charge, so hurry up and get in!" He paused and seemed to listen to something, before rolling his eyes. "You're dancing?!" He gave Sarah an incredulous look. "Never mind. Come on, let's go."
"Wait! What about our-"
"Now!" Ironhide grabbed my arm as well, and the next thing I knew, we were being hauled towards the truck.
"I just wanted to grab my drink." I felt my irritation rise. I'd barely even had time to drink a third of it.
"It can wait!"
Frowning, I caught Sarah's eyes and watched as Maggie obediantly but unhappily followed us, and the expressions in their faces said the same thing as the thoughts going through my mind.
This better be a freaking life or death emergency, or someone's gonna get it!
(Normal POV, A Month Later)
Wheeljack nervously looked around, optics shining brightly and facial fins flashing with anxiety as he rounded another corner of the base hall. He shifted a tiny bag in one large hand as he went, and grumbled to himself in Cybertronian.
Glancing around a corner, he paused and ducked back out of sight, stepping into a spare room and waiting until his sensors indicated Ironhide and Prowl had gone past on their routes. Luckily it was a supply closet, so an Autobot's signal inside it wouldn't stick out to them.
Once he deemed it safe, he snuck out of the room and hurried down the hall, glancing around repeatedly as he went, before slipping into a human's quarters via their guardian's entrance, and pausing at the sight of the three women in front of him.
"Did anyone follow you?"
"I'm pretty sure I evaded them."
"Good, you got the stuff?"
Holding up the bag, Wheeljack tilted his head a little. "Why do you need these? You do realize how much trouble I'll be in if-"
"Relax." The third woman spoke up, clearly the leader of the group. "Just hand over the chips and we'll think up a cover story to cover your aft. You'll be safe. No offlining, ok?" She held out a hand expectantly. "As for why we need those, let's just say Ironhide ticked off the wrong humans."
"That was a waste of ten bucks and perfectly good drinks." The lighter blonde hissed darkly. "Twice."
"Over a truck with Barricade's bumper stuck to it. No threat, and he still nabbed us." The final girl's glare was enough for Wheeljack to almost throw them the bag. "No one takes us from our cafffinated goodness and gets away scott free."
"And it wasn't just him, either." They shared glares.
"You've got the chips. My name stays out of it?" He eyed the strange femmes in front of him, once again making a mental note to never anger the mates of his human allies.
"Deal. No one will know. Promise." Mikeala took a look into the bag, her lips pulling up into a rather frightening grin. "This is going to be priceless."
As Wheeljack left he room, he sighed in relief and darted down the hall. If Autobots could sweat, he'd be drenched, even as he shivered a little and continued on. Primus, I have a bad feeling!
(Two Days Later, Mikeala's POV)
I was laying back on an air mattress on the abandoned section of the base runway, dressed in short jean cuttoffs and a pink tank top as I sun bathed, reading a magazine to pass the time. On my left was Sarah, who was sipping her french vanilla ice cap, and Maggie was on our right with her butter caramel.
Wheeljack walked past, shooting us nerouvs glances as he went, and even picking up his pace when I nudged the others and we all shot him looks.
"We've got him whipped." Maggie giggled quietly into her drink.
"Can you blame him? Oh, how did your implants go?" I grinned widely, thinking of my own.
She smirked and placed her drink on the ground to shoot me two thumbs up, before lifting her drink to her lips. Sarah didn't even bother to put her drink down, giving me an evil smirk and lifted eyebrow as my answer.
"So how long do you think we should wait?"
"Don't they have a meeting out here, judging the safety of the runway or something, in a few minutes?" Maggie pursed her lips.
I giggled and picked up my own ice cap. "Wonder how far that'll get when they see three humans sun bathing on it." I snickered, before taking a sip. "Oh, I can't wait! This'll teach Ironhide and Ratchet to mess with us."
"I'm just glad we agreed not to prank Optimus this time."
I looked to Sarah and nodded. "Well, he did tell Ratchet to leave us be the second time, only to be ignored. That warrants some respect."
"You know, I've never seen Ratchet as a fe-"
"Shhhhhh!" I clapped a hand over Sarah's mouth, and watched as she narrowed her eyes mock indignantly, before we both busted up into giggles. "Show time." I whispered, reaching under the towel at my side for the tiny remote.
Optimus Prime, Bumblebee, Jazz, Ratchet and Ironhide... The first five Autobot arrivals on earth, were approaching with a few familiar faces. Among them were Simmons, Keller, Will, Robert, Sam, and General Morshower, who had finally been allowed to be introduced personally to the Autobots.
"Why, again, did we get Jazz?"
I shrugged at Maggie. "'Cause we could." I waited until they got closer, before snickering and hitting the switch.
Optimus was in the lead, so he didn't notice anything unusual with his officers behind him. Jazz, Ratchet and Ironhide were all walking side by side, facing forward, so they didn't notice either. Bumblebee and the humans, on the other hand, froze solid.
It was when the music started that Optimus' head sank. Immediately he turned to face us with a 'What? AGAIN???' look, before taking a deep breath and bravely daring a look over his shoulders.
Then he did a double take, his jaw dropping.
"What the slag?!?" The now feminine Ironhide screeched, catching the attention of all the other Autobots and humans milling around on the base in general. He glanced at the two mechs next to him, and a slightly relieved look came to his optics. "Oh, pit! Thank Primus I'm not the only one!" He sighed heavily.
With expressions of dread, the newly feminine Jazz and Ratchet exchanged looks, before squealing, yes squealing, and chattering away in anxious sounding Cybertronian.
Sam was by this point carefully and quietly leading the humans away, with the help of Bumblebee, who was shaking uncontrollably with his attempts to muffle his laughter. Glancing my way, Sam's wide eyes widened even more, and he paused, frowning. 'Caramelldansen???' He mouthed in horror.
And yeah, I listened to the song enough around him that he knew the music.
As the music picked up, the three mech-femmes froze, their optics going blank as they stood next to each other. What happened next either sent mechs offlining, or humans screeching in laughter. Even Optimus collapsed heavily onto his aft, his jaw hanging and a look of traumatized shock on his face, as Prowl toppled over sideways behind him.
Women are you ready to join us now?
Skids was in the midst of taping an 'Out of Order' sign to Prowl's face plates when the dancing started, and he froze, his own jaw dropping.
Arms were raised into the air, over heads, and the mech-femmes began bouncing back and forth, swaying their hips as they went. They had expressions of utter joy on their faces as they swayed, and sang.
Hands in the air, we will show you how.
Come and try,
Caramell will be your guide (be your guide)
Mudflap had taken the note from his shocked brother's hands and tapped it to his forehead, before busting up laughing and dashing across the runway. Sunstreaker and Sideswipe had paused in waxing each other to watch the show with looks of horror in their faces, before turning to us and shrinking back with dual looks of utter reverence and terror in their optics.
Come on and move your hips, singing
Oa-ah-ah
Look at you two hips do it
La-la-la
You and me, can sing this melody.
The mech-femmes suddenly took three steps to the side, following the music, before going back and resuming their jumping and swaying with their arms in the air.
Optimus was staring at his CMO, Weapons Specialist and First Lieutentant in shock. The three mechs made excellent femmes, I'd admit, but the idea they were really mechs was kind of scary. And if you add in Ratchet and Ironhide's usually gruff exteriors...
Owah-owah-ah-oh
I doubled over laughing, leaning against Sarah, with Maggie leaning against me. "Oh, Lord!" I giggled hysterically as the mechs jumped again, their chassis bouncing ever so slightly with the jumps, and Optimus' utterly blank look, his jaw creaking in the wind.
Glancing to the door of the hangar, I made out the approach of three motorcycles and laughed even harder as they transformed and watched in confused amusement. Chromia wheeled over to the 'Vette twins who seemed to have abandoned their cloths in favor of watching the show, and spoke quietly to them, and I guess she was asking who the femmes were, because a few moments later she was on the ground, laughing her aft off.
Dance to the beat,
Wave your hands together
Come feel the heat, forever and forever
Listen and learn
It's time for prancing
Now we are here, with Caramell dancing!
I was already laughing hard, but when Bumblebee squeaked and rushed out to dance with the mech-femmes, I think I very nearly offlined myself with laughter. At this point, Optimus was shaking his head and chuckling, even with his face half buried under one of his hands.
Seeing Bee out there sent the Chevy twins following him, and soon there were six Autobots swaying their hands in the air and their hips side to side. This, of course, set off the femmes, who went out and joined, still laughing their afts off. Before long, all the younglings and femmes were out there dancing, and Optimus was clutching his stomach from laughter.
I got up and began packing my things, even as I took another sip from my drink.
O-o-owah-owah
O-o-owah-owah-ah-oh
O-o-owah-owah
O-o-owah-owah-ah-oh
Come on and move your hips, singing
Oa-ah-ah
Oh their hips were moving and they were singing alright!
Look at you two hips do it
La-la-la
You and me, can sing this melody.
I giggled hysterically, dropping the deflating air mattress when I saw them dancing. I even watched as the humans the Autobots had brought out were laughing their behinds off. Bee had a look of utter bliss on his face as he squeaked and warbled cutely, dancing along, and the twins were almost bumping in to each other as they went. Sideswipe and the...very reluctant Sunstreaker were actually pretty good, though Sunny's glare pretty much scared anyone off from saying anything about it.
Still...
"I should see about asking the 'Vette twins to join our workout class." I whispered to Sarah and Maggie, watching as Maggie fell to her knees in laughter and Sarah clutched at her stomach, her face turning bright red.
"Lord help us all. We'd better hurry and get outta here." Maggie quickly squeezed the air out of her air mattress, before half stuffing it into her bag, and picking her bag and drink up.
We quickly followed suit and were ready to dash off at a moment's notice.
So come and
Dance to the beat,
Wave your hands together
Come feel the heat, forever and forever
Listen and learn
It's time for prancing
Now we are here, with Caramell dancing!
Briskly walking over to Optimus, I shot him a big toothy grin. "Aren't you glad you didn't interfere with out workouts and get between us and our Timmies?" I asked, leaning against his leg and giggling as Bee took the lead, standing next to the dazed mech-femmes.
Dance to the beat,
Wave your hands together
Come feel the heat, forever and forever
Listen and learn
It's time for prancing
Now we are here, with Caramell dancing!
He sighed heavily. "Let me guess... That human saying, 'Give me my Timmies and you won't get hurt'?"
I giggled, almost choking on my drink, before taking a step away. "Oh yeah." I nodded, before Sarah, Maggie and I quickly fled the area, not wanting to be around when the override chips wore off, and the illusion chips were still in place.
We were by the hangar door when a rather feminine roar reached our ears, and we shrieked and ran into the building as a giant metallic wrench bounced off the nearby walls.
Hope you like it.
R+R please.
Thank you.
Tenshi
