Chapter 4 - Dust and Lies

When Ron opened his eyes the next morning, his first thought was that it had all been a dream. He wasn't a particularly lucky person. Not that he was unlucky, but things like what he remembered happening the night before just did not happen to him. They just didn't...

But then why was Hermione curled up against him under his blanket, sleeping soundly and breathing gently, sweet puffs of air blowing feather light across his neck?

Not possible. Nope. Just not possible.

Ron stared at the top of Hermione's head, his brain struggling to process the fact that it was possible. That it actually... was.

He swallowed and tried not to focus on the butterflies that had sprung furiously to life in his stomach. He tried to remind himself that she had wound up in his bed once before a few weeks ago. But she had been upset. She hadn't wanted to wake Ginny, she'd said. She wanted company, and understandably after what she'd been forced to do to her parents...

But now Ron felt her stirring next to him, her arm squeezing his waist a little tighter as her head moved against his shoulder, her hair tickling his face.

He felt lightheaded, slightly sick, and the happiest he could ever remember being. He tightened his grip around her back, his arm pulling her against his side even closer, and then, something incredible happened. She tilted her head up to look at him... and smiled at him.

If he hadn't been lying down, he was almost sure he would have collapsed.

"Hey," he managed to say finally.

"Hey," she said back sleepily, her cheeks going a bit pink.

They stared sleepily at each other, wide smiles on their faces, their hearts beating fast, until suddenly Hermione's eyes went wide.

"What?" Ron asked quickly.

"Your mum! What if she comes up here?!" Hermione whispered frantically. "I'd better go..."

And then she was sitting up, sliding out of Ron's arms, and swinging her legs over the edge of the bed. Ron suddenly felt very cold. He knew Hermione was probably right, so he let her stand and head for the door. She pulled open the door slowly and peered out onto the landing. Satisfied by the lack of noise or moving people near the top of the house, she opened the door wider. Ron sat up in his bed, trying to think of something to say before she left. But just as she was about to walk through the door, she turned back towards him, not quite looking directly at him, her face flushed.

"Ron," she whispered. "Thanks for letting me stay in your room... again." She blushed even deeper.

"Nah, you can stay anytime," Ron said before he had a chance to think about his words. But Hermione grinned at him, then slipped through the door and out of sight.


In the shower fifteen minutes later, Ron let the warm water run over his body for longer than was really necessary. It felt a lot better in the shower than he knew it would outside in the summer heat doing some mental chore that his mother was sure to assign him the moment she saw him. There wasn't much on his mind, however, other than Hermione. He wanted to kiss her again. It was practically all he had thought about since waking up. For one of the first mornings in his life, he had yet to think about food, and he had already been awake for half an hour.

He finally stepped out of the shower and dried quickly, then dressed, looking at himself in the mirror. He always glanced at his reflection after a shower to be sure his hair wasn't sticking up at any angles that were too insane. But he never really thought much about his appearance. There were several things that he wasn't particularly fond of... his freckles, for one, and his ginger hair which had always bothered him. He also knew that his nose was a bit too long, but it was so covered in freckles (one of the worst things about his appearance, he thought) that he hardly ever got far enough in his personal critique to notice.

But for some reason, when he looked at himself today, he found that he was thinking about how these things might not be so bad. So what if he had hair that could very easily be described as orange? Maybe that wasn't so terrible. After all, his whole family had hair very close to the same color. Maybe it did make it obvious what family he belonged to, but he was proud of his family, not disappointed. He was proud to be a part of a pure blood family that embraced Muggles and wizards and witches with non-magic parents. There was never a day in his life that he could recall not feeling fond of Muggles. Considering his father worked in the Muggle Artifacts Office, he had been brought up around Muggle things and Muggle ways, even if he didn't understand most of them and often thought of them as a bit dodgy, he still had respect for them, something that plenty of pure blood families could not say.

And then there was Hermione. When he thought of the way Malfoy would insult them if he found out that Hermione and Ron were together, a Muggle born witch with a pure blood wizard, it made him grin. He could hardly wait for the day when Malfoy found out. Then he'd have quite a good excuse to punch Malfoy right in the nose, something he fantasized about on a regular basis.

Grinning to himself about punching Malfoy, he opened the bathroom door, a large billowing amount of smoke flowing out into the hallway before he had even cleared the doorway. Just as he was about to turn left and head back up towards his room, he heard Ginny and Hermione's voices behind Ginny's closed door just in front of him. Though he was quite sure they weren't aware of it, he could hear what they were saying perfectly clearly.

"I told you, didn't I!" Ginny said excitedly.

"I know, Ginny," Hermione laughed. "It wasn't that I doubted you exactly..."

"No?" Ginny said sarcastically. "Oh, well you had me fooled..."

"How was I supposed to know?" Hermione asked, a smile still evident in her voice.

"Well, shall I list the totally obvious signs or the kind of mildly obvious ones first?" Ginny said.

Hermione laughed.

In the hallway, Ron's eyes had gradually widened throughout what he was hearing. Were they talking about him? Even though he knew he shouldn't be here - he absolutely should not be standing here eavesdropping - he just couldn't help it... He was far too curious. They began speaking again...

"I'm so glad I told him," Hermione sighed.

Now Ron was nearly certain they were talking about him...

"Me too," Ginny said. "Merlin, I'm so glad I don't have to watch Ron make a fool of himself trying to hide his feelings from you."

Ron felt his cheeks heat up. Hermione giggled.

"So what exactly did you tell him?" Ginny asked slyly.

"You know what I told him, Ginny!" Hermione replied, her voice rising nervously.

"Nuh uh," Ginny laughed.

"Ginny," Hermione groaned.

"Not that I want all the sick details..." Ginny added, clearly grinning.

"Ginny!" Hermione shouted. Ginny laughed. "I... I told him that... that I fancy him," Hermione said in a softer voice after a moment.

Ron took a step closer to Ginny's bedroom door, knowing that this was very wrong of him, but unable to leave now. He was already in this deep, might as well hear the rest...

"That's all?" Ginny asked skeptically.

"Well, yes," Hermione said matter-of-factly.

"Well, that was a lie."

Ron's heartbeat quickened. What did Ginny mean by that?

"No it wasn't..." Hermione said, but her voice was unsteady.

"You totally know it was," Ginny said.

"But what was I supposed to say?" Hermione said a bit desperately. "I know I did the right thing."

"You could have gone one step further..." Ginny said slyly.

"No, what I did was good enough. He knows I fancy him now, and..." Hermione paused. "I know he fancies me back," she finished, the smile returning to her voice.

Ron felt a bit relieved, but also confused... what was it that Ginny thought Hermione had lied about?

"Ginny, I really don't want to scare him off," Hermione said.

Ginny snorted.

"No, really, Gin!" Hermione said quickly. "Look, it makes sense. I... I know that I... love him... but that's not going to be easy to say..."

Ron's eyes widened to perfect circles. Hermione loved him. His brain began a constant chant... She loves me. She loves me. She loves me!!

"I'll obviously tell him eventually, but I want to do this right," Hermione continued. "It's got to be slow."

"Why?" Ginny asked, a grin in her voice now again.

"Well I don't need things to be slow," Hermione said, and Ron thought he could hear the blush in her voice. "But I want to make sure that I don't mess anything up. Do you have any idea how much this means to me? Last night was the best night of my life, Ginny. If I said something to ruin it..."

"You think Ron wouldn't say he loves you back if you went up there and told him right this second?" Ginny asked.

"I don't know," Hermione admitted.

"Well, I know," Ginny stated.

There was a long silence. Ron wondered if they were done talking, and he held his breath, scared that someone might leave the room, but far too curious about what they might say next to leave his spot mere inches in front of Ginny's bedroom door.

"Ginny," Hermione said softly. "I love him so much it almost hurts."

Ron's heart was beating so fast now that he thought it might explode. He wanted to run into Ginny's room, tell Hermione that he felt exactly the same way, then tell Ginny to bugger off for the rest of the day...

"Hermione," Ginny said sweetly. "I'm really happy for you."

"Thank you," Hermione said, her voice cracking a little.

There was silence again. Then finally, Ron heard shuffling from behind the door. He had just enough time to take a step back, putting him in front of the open bathroom door, before Ginny's bedroom door opened, revealing Hermione on the other side. Her eyes widened.

"Ron!" she exclaimed, a bit alarmed. Ron tried to adjust his face so he wouldn't so clearly show signs of having just overheard the best news ever...

"Uh, hey," he mumbled, then cleared his throat. "Just... just finished in the shower." He gestured unnecessarily to the bathroom behind him.

"Oh," Hermione said, looking vaguely relieved, but still a bit startled.

"So, it's free," Ron added, trying not to look directly at Hermione.

"Oh, okay," Hermione said. "Thanks."

Ron turned to head upstairs, but then suddenly, realizing that his behavior had been a bit odd, he turned back to face Hermione as she crossed the hallway to the bathroom.

"Hermione," he called down. "When you're done in the shower, do you want to go for a walk with me? I'm sure Mum will have a load of chores for us all to do, but maybe we can sneak off for a few minutes?"

Hermione grinned up at him, her face turning pink.

"Yes, I'd love to," Hermione said, and Ron smiled back at her, then turned and continued up the stairs to his room.


Did this count as a date? Ron wondered as he paced his room. He was terribly nervous all of a sudden. It had been twenty minutes, and he was sure Hermione had finished in the shower already. He had put on clean socks and was completely ready to go, but he had decided something a few minutes ago, something that was making his insides feel like wriggling snakes.

Ginny told Hermione that she had lied to Ron. Hermione had told Ron that she fancied him, but not that she loved him. Well, in that case, Ron had lied to Hermione as well. And now that he knew how Hermione really felt, it was down to him to tell her how he really felt about her. He had made up his mind. She had clearly said in Ginny's room that she was only planning to take things slow with Ron because she was worried that he wanted it that way. But he sure as hell didn't. He knew how much he loved her. He knew that he would never change his mind. And he knew now that she needed to know that too. Then she could say it back as he was sure she would, and... well, whatever happened after that would be perfect. Getting past this would make a lot of things a lot easier. He knew it would.

He didn't know how long they would have together. As much as he didn't like to think about it, it was true that anything could happen. Anything could go wrong, could change... but right now, they had each other. He didn't want to wait any longer, to draw anything else out. He wanted to have everything that Hermione wanted. He would do anything for her, and anything she asked him to.

And now, as soon as they got outside, he had to tell her. He just had to. But even though he knew she would return his feelings, it was driving him mad just thinking about what he was going to say...

Finally, when he thought he couldn't possibly make Hermione wait any longer, he headed downstairs, his heart pounding furiously, his blood pumping rapidly through his veins.

When he reached the bottom of the stairs, Hermione was standing by the front door, slipping her feet into her shoes. When Ron crossed the entryway, she looked up and smiled at him. He smiled nervously back, stepped into his own shoes, and opened the door for her.

"Thanks," she said through her smile as she stepped through the door. He followed her down the front steps and into the yard.

"Where to?" he asked, and Hermione shrugged.

"Anywhere," she said.

"Surprised Mum didn't stop us," Ron said as they began to walk. "I didn't see her in the kitchen though. That was lucky."

"She was there when I came down, asked if you could help trim the bushes when you came down. I told her I'd tell you."

"Ah," Ron said, rolling his eyes. "Knew it." He paused for a second, then glanced over at Hermione, grinning. "But you didn't stop me from going on this little walk with you."

"Of course not. I haven't seen you come down from your room yet," Hermione said, giggling.

"Oh, yeah, right," Ron said, grinning wider.

They continued to walk in silence for a few moments, Ron's mind racing over all the possible ways that he could tell Hermione what he had to tell her... His stomach was twisting and squeezing, making him feel quite sick. Just get it over with! his brain screamed as they neared the edge of the yard.

Ron started to slow down, knowing that he was running out of time. This was it. He had to tell her. Hermione seemed to notice him slowing down and she turned to look at him. A flash of concern crossed her face as their eyes met, and Ron knew he must look ill. His hands were shaking slightly and he wasn't sure what color his face was at this point...

"Ron," Hermione began, "are you okay?"

Ron stopped walking completely and shifted his weight from foot to foot.

"Ron?" Hermione tried again after a moment.

Ron let out a long shaky breath and stared down at his feet. Just do it! Just say it!

He opened his mouth, but no words made it out. He closed his mouth, sighed, and opened it again. Come on! Come on! his brain shouted.

Finally, his eyes darted up to Hermione's for a second and he saw the concern etched into her features. He knew this was it. Time to be brave. He was going to tell her that he had lied to her too, just like Ginny had accused Hermione of...

"You know what I said last night, about fancying you?" Ron began, taking a deep breath. "Well, that's not really true..."

Hermione froze, her eyes suddenly wide and terrified.

"Wh... what?" she managed to choke out.

Ron ran a shaky hand through his hair. He couldn't believe what he was about to say, but he had to do it. He had come this far, hadn't he?

"It's... not exactly true," he said again. Hermione stepped back as if stung, and Ron looked up at her, suddenly confused.

"It's... not?" she choked out, but as Ron opened his mouth to ask why tears were forming in her eyes, she held up a hand. "Don't!" she shouted frantically. "I don't want..." but she seemed unable to continue.

"What's wrong?" Ron asked, stepping forward towards her despite her protests.

"Nothing! Nothing!" she said shrilly, her voice unnaturally high. And she continued to back away from him another few steps. "It's okay... a mistake... I should have known. That was... silly of me," she said quickly in that same strange false sounding voice.

"What?" Ron asked, his eyebrows furrowed. "Wait a second, I-"

But she shook her head furiously.

"Stop!" she shouted. "Just stop. I'm going back inside. Don't follow me," and she turned, holding her head up as high as she could, and she began to practically run back towards the house. Ron stood stunned for a moment. Was she not yet ready to hear that he loved her? Had she really figured out what he was about to say? But why had she been so upset even if she had figured it out? She had said in Ginny's room that she felt so strongly for him that it hurt... didn't that mean... that maybe she loved him too? So why was she crying now if she sensed... and then suddenly it hit him. And for the second time in twenty-four hours, Ron felt like a complete arse.

"Hermione!" he shouted as he sprinted towards her. "Hold on a second, will you?"

She stopped and turned on her heel to face him, her face tracked with thick tears and her eyes very red. Ron's eyes softened and he felt like banging his head against something.

"It wasn't true that I fancy you..." he began quickly, ready to clear this up, but Hermione cut in, pleading with him as he was speaking.

"Please, just don't..."

But Ron plowed on, knowing that in a few seconds, she'd understand what he had really meant...

"Because I'm actually in love with you."

Hermione blinked, her eyes wider than ever.

"Wh-what..." she choked out for the second time.

Ron sighed.

"Did you think I regretted last night? I bloody love you, Hermione. I'll never regret a thing."

"Ron," she breathed, regaining her composure, wiping the tears from her face. When her eyes met his again, they flashed for a moment and Ron looked sheepishly back at her. "Ron, you complete arse!" she shouted, wiping more falling tears from her eyes and cheeks.

"Yeah," he agreed, running a hand through his hair, realizing that Hermione had just voiced exactly what he'd thought of himself moments before. "I deserve that."

"What were you thinking?!" Hermione cried.

"I'm so sorry... that was... a really mental thing to start off with, saying that I didn't mean what I said last night..."

Hermione nodded, blinked, and wiped her eyes once more.

"Honestly," Hermione mumbled through a shaky sigh. But her lips turned up slightly as she glanced back up at Ron. "Do you mean it?" she asked in a tiny voice.

Ron nodded.

"Always," he said, and the hint of a smile that had been playing on Hermione's lips broke into a full grin.

"If you ever scare me like that again, I'll hex you," she said through a laugh.

"Okay," Ron said, smiling now too. "Please do."

"Now I have something to say to you, Ronald," Hermione said as she stepped closer to him. Ron grinned at her use of his full name.

"Go on," he urged as he took a step towards her too.

"I don't fancy you either."

"No?" Ron asked, widening his eyes comically and staring down at Hermione, trying his best to look hurt.

"No. Not at all," she said as she put her hands on her hips and glared up at him, trying to hide the smile that was creeping back onto her face.

"Well, this is just devastating," Ron said, looking away from her and shaking his head. "How will I go on?"

Hermione giggled and Ron felt his heartbeat suddenly triple as he sensed what she was about to say... She was really going to say it back!

"I'm in love with you too, Ron. I have been for... years..."

Ron found it incredibly difficult to swallow all of a sudden and he knew that he was grinning like a fool, but he couldn't stop.

"Blimey," he managed to say as he put his hands on Hermione's arms. "I... years..." But he was once again lost for words. They both began to laugh, and before he knew it, their lips had met and he was holding the back of her head with one hand, his other arm wrapped around her thin waist. In a moment of complete elation, Ron spun on the spot, lifting Hermione off the ground, their lips still joined. Hermione broke away laughing and leaned into him, nearly toppling them both to the ground. But then Ron was pulling her down playfully and they fell softly onto the warm summer grass.

He kissed her again, his body covering hers. When he broke away again, he smiled down at her and she ran her hand along the back of his neck causing goosebumps to spring up instantly.

But then suddenly Ron realized where they were and he looked up from Hermione, his grin still plastered into place. They were in the middle of the yard where anyone could see them from almost anywhere inside the Burrow. He glanced around the yard and Hermione furrowed her eyebrows at him.

"What are you looking for?" she asked, puzzled.

"A place to go where no one can see us," Ron admitted. "Ah!" he said suddenly, and he took Hermione's hand and stood, pulling her up gently. He began to lead them towards the shed and she followed him happily. When they reached the door, Ron glanced over his shoulder to see if anyone had seen them approaching, then opened the door for her, stepped in after her, and closed the door behind them. They stood just inside the large, cluttered, dusty old shed for a moment, both looking around.

"Nice romantic place," Hermione said sarcastically, but she smiled up at Ron. He rolled his eyes jokingly.

"I'd like to see you do better," he said, then immediately wished he hadn't. Hermione wasn't one to step down from a challenge.

"Oh, would you?" she asked, putting her hands on her hips again. Ron shrugged as Hermione stepped over a pile of old junk and found a relatively clear space on the floor. She removed her wand from her jeans and with a few quick swishes, the floor was nearly spotless. Then she aimed her wand at an old wooden stool and with a single flick, it turned into a very comfortable looking pillow. She turned back to face Ron, smiling proudly at her work.

"Okay, fine," Ron said as he approached her. "How about this?" He removed his own wand from his pocket and with a mumbled "Engorgio", the pillow enlarged to the size of a small mattress. Next, he aimed his wand at two more stools and turned them into smaller pillows, slightly lumpier than Hermione's, but still, he was rather pleased with the result.

Hermione watched approvingly as he dropped the two pillows onto the mattress with a flourish.

"There," he said with a smirk.

"Well, this is certainly more like it," Hermione said as she plopped down onto the rather thick and comfortable bed-sized pillow.

"Glad you like it," Ron said as he sat next to her.

"Though, to be fair, it was my idea."

"Ah, yes, that's true," Ron agreed as he leaned towards Hermione. He licked his lips absentmindedly, but Hermione clearly caught it. Her eyes moved to his lips and stayed there as Ron leaned closer, closer... agonizingly closer.

"Come here," Hermione said, and she pulled him against her, both of them falling back onto the smaller pillows.

When they broke away again, Ron pulled his hand out from behind Hermione's head, looking at something between his fingers.

"You had some grass in your hair," he said with a lopsided smile.

"Oh," Hermione whispered. "Thank you."

"No problem," Ron whispered back. He leaned down and kissed her gently, and when he pulled back, she grinned at him, her arms around his neck.

"Let's never leave this place, okay?" she said softly. Ron nodded, smiling back at her.

"Good idea," and he kissed her again.