Author's Note: I noticed a drop in reviews for the last chapter, and while I'm not one of those "I must get (insert amount here) before I post the next installment" authors, it's still important for me to know what those of you reading my story think. I know the situation is a little slow, but I can promise you it starts picking up within these next few chapters. Also, I love Sweets, but he's kind of difficult for me to write for some reason. If he seems a little OOC I apologize, but I tried to keep it as close as I could. Also, I realize there's hasn't been that much Booth-centric type of scenes lately. I'll be making up for that coming up soon. Anyway, I'll be quiet for now. Reviews are welcome as always, so please let me know what you think!
Brennan settled into the booth across from Max and Parker. So far, the afternoon seemed to be going well, regardless of the less than perfect feeling that lingered. She began to realize what Parker had to have been feeling, or at the least partly, about the situation at hand. "Do you like your ice cream?"
Parker rubbed his hand along his mouth before Max had the chance to hand him a napkin. He nodded before his spoon dug into the bowl again. "Yeah, it's good."
Max smiled at his daughter, pleased that she was at least trying to make a connection. "That was some kick there at the end of the game."
"Thanks," Parker replied. He shrugged with a smile; a smile that to the other two sitting at the table, practically mirrored that of his father. "Dad says it doesn't matter as long as I try. I mean, the other team got those tiny trophies anyway. But Coach says if we keep it up, there's gonna be a pizza party at the end of the season."
"Your father's right, Parker. It's important you and your team get along." Max spoke before taking a sip from his milkshake. He laughed at the dejected look on Parker's face before placing a hand on his shoulder. "But still, I'm very proud of you."
Brennan watched the two interact and wasn't quite sure what to think. It was obvious to her, let alone anyone who happened to walk by their table, that the two were at least partially close. Realizing that fact caused a certain sadness to pool inside. While she'd never been particularly good with children, Parker had apparently been an exception, which she knew was due to the time she spent with him and Booth. Apparently, that family time had extended to include her family as well. She struggled to come up with something to say, wanting so badly to participate in the conversation. The whole process was a little troubling, because if she said nothing or too little it would cause Parker and her father both to think she was trying to be distant, but if she spoke too much not only would she monopolize the conversation but it would provide hope it was too soon to give. Amnesiac or not, she was unwilling to let that happen.
"Are you okay, Bones?" Parker asked, his chocolate-covered spoon hanging precariously in the air.
At that, Brennan snapped herself out of the reverie she was in and smiled in his direction. It was then that she noticed her own bowl of strawberry sorbet was quickly melting. "Yes, I'm fine. Thank you though, for asking."
Max couldn't help but notice the way she seemed to actually be content in answering Parker, and yet when anyone else asked it was as if she was offended they ever did. It was too soon to get his hopes up about anything in particular, but the more he thought about it he realized maybe being around him would be a good thing. He wasn't exactly an expert on the subject, but he thought it could end up triggering a memory or two. "You know what, I've got an idea."
"What?" Parker asked, finally using the napkin Max had given him. His eyes widened at the possibility of a surprise.
"Well," Max begin, propping his elbows against the table as he caught Brennan's eye. "I was just thinking maybe instead of going back to Angela and Hodgins' place, you could join Parker and me at mine. At least for a little while. We could play games or something, and I know there's that new movie Parker's been wanting to see."
"Dad," Brennan began, knowing what he was trying to do. She didn't mind necessarily, but she hated feeling like she was being put on the spot.
"Bones, please? Come on, it'll be awesome!" Parker chimed. He had perked up at the mere mention, even if he had already been excited, but he tried remembering what his father had told him. They were supposed to be taking it easy on Bones, not pushing her until she felt ready. "I mean, you don't have to..." He started pushing his spoon around in the remains of his ice cream sundae, now nothing but a chocolate syrup and a few drops of melted ice cream.
Brennan hadn't missed the disappointed look that flashed briefly across his features. His features, she noted, that seemed to be resembling those of his father more each time she saw him. She knew there was no real obligation, but the thought of upsetting Parker was something Brennan found herself unable to cope with. It confused her a little, for it was something she couldn't remember ever really experiencing, but Brennan knew well enough to trust in that moment she was doing the right thing. "If it's alright with you Parker, then yes, I'd like to come." She smiled at Max. "After all, I don't want to be sitting alone while Ange and Hodgins are at the lab anyway."
Several hours later any leads that could have been made in the case had been exhausted, leaving Booth and the squints with nothing else to do but go home and gear up for the hard days to follow. There were days when he found he kind of loathed his chosen career field, and days that he had cases when he had Parker were always on that list. He hated putting of any of their valuable time together, even if he'd be spending it with someone he cared about. As Parker's father he wanted to spend as much time as was allowed with him, and having cases prevented some of that. Booth knocked on Max's door knowing he was later than planned, but a glitch at the lab had stalled in gaining an important set of results. When Brennan was the one to open the door, he felt himself jerk back for a second, and he felt a little upset he reacted in such a way. "Hey, Bones. I didn't know you'd still be here."
Brennan shrugged before letting him in. "It wasn't something that was completely planned. After leaving the soccer field, Parker, my father and I headed to the diner for ice cream. We came back here after that. Parker suggested we play a game." Brennan said, laughing as she gestured to the sleeping boy on the couch. "He beat us both at kings in the corner. I don't remember ever playing, but he did tell me you taught us once. Something about promising him fries at the diner if he could learn to beat you?"
Booth laughed before reaching to rub the back of his neck. He wished he didn't have to feel so tense, because keeping his guard up was proving to be difficult. "Yeah, but I won. Got him the fries anyway."
"That does sound familiar." Out of the corner of her eye, Brennan could see Max busying himself in the kitchen, trying his best to not listen. "How is everything with the case?"
The way Brennan could so quickly dismiss remembering something bothered Booth, but he remembered the promise he made to do things her way, at her pace. It didn't mean he had to like it. "Complicated I guess, but that's normal. A body was found in a basement over in Bethesda. There's disagreement as to just who it is, let alone how she might have gotten there."
"Our profession never was easy." Brennan mused. For a moment, it felt like they were back in a time when conversation about cases was perfectly normal, even if that was completely impossible. "I'm sure you'll figure it out."
"I always do." Booth replied with a sigh. He hated how formal everything felt. If she could stop being so stubborn, they'd be able to try and find a way to make it all work, but he knew if that was to happen he'd have to wait. That wasn't the way Brennan worked. "He wasn't too much trouble, was he?"
Brennan cast a glance at Parker, hands tucked underneath the pillow and knees curled up tight, and she shook her head. "No, of course not. Parker is an exceptional boy." A smile crossed her face as she looked back at him. "I'd like to thank you for allowing my dad to look after him today. I realize it isn't the first time, but I'm glad to see whatever the situation is between us it has not affected their relationship."
"Parker loves Max, I wouldn't want to interfere with that." Booth replied. He caught her eye and paused, wanting her to listen clearly to what he had to say next. "For the record, Temperance, he loves you, too. I'm not going to keep him away from you if you'd like to see him."
Brennan nodded in appreciation, even if she knew he had other motives. "You're hoping being around him will somehow force some of my memories to the surface."
It wasn't a question, but still Booth had to agree. "I don't see why you'd have a problem with that. I just figured you'd wanna get your life back. Whatever works, right?"
There was a tinge of something Brennan couldn't quite define in his voice, but he sounded little more than annoyed. "I'm doing what I can. Thank you for your concern."
"You know, Bones-" Booth started. He paused upon realizing he didn't have anything definitive to say. Did she have to act so frigid about it? Booth could only imagine how she had to be feeling on the inside, and even if it was anger at him, he wished she would just show half of that emotion. When she was bottling all of those feelings up, it wasn't good for anybody.
Parker rolled over on the couch, his hands swatting out at something neither of them could see, and he started mumbling something about banana eating robot monkeys.
For just a moment, the whole situation felt eerily familiar, and Brennan laughed at the complete calm of the situation. "He's had a long day. Do you need help getting him out to the truck?"
While Booth knew he could easily get Parker out to the truck without any help, he wasn't about to pass up on an opportunity. "Parker?" He shook his son's shoulder and watched as his eyes slowly opened. "Hey, bud. We're gonna head home now, okay?"
Parker groaned in exhaustion before forcing himself into a sitting position. "Mmkay. Hey, where's my soccer bag?"
"Right here." Max replied, bringing it in from where it had been sitting near the kitchen table. "I'll see you next time."
By that time Parker had stood, and he offered him a hug before shuffling to the door.
Booth was next to walk by, laughing at the way Parker's steps faltered. He caught up with him to make sure the untied shoe on his left foot wouldn't cause any trouble.
Brennan witnessed the hint of a smile playing in Max's eyes and knew he had to be enjoying this moment, whatever it could be called, probably more than any of the rest of them. As they walked outside, she watched Booth open the door to the backseat for Parker, but was a bit alarmed when he jumped away from his father's grasp.
"Wait." Parker spoke with more energy than he'd displayed since waking up. He hopped from the backseat and jogged the few steps in her direction. Before she had a chance to react, his arms wrapped her tight in a hug. "G'night, Bones. I had a lot of fun today."
"So did I, Parker." Brennan replied, one hand wrapped tight around him and the other tousling the curls atop his head, and she struggled hard to gain anything she could from that moment. His arms let go before she could react, and he climbed back into the SUV. Brennan watched as Booth shut the car door and turned in her direction. "Is everything okay?"
"Yeah, everything's good." Booth replied. He shoved a hand in his suit pocket, fighting the urge to reach out and touch her. She was the one going through this ordeal, and yet Brennan still showed concern for him. "I'm just gonna take him home. Becca should be back tomorrow night and he'll head back there, but I want to spend as much time with him as I can."
She nodded in understanding. Other than the facts she was confronted with and the few things she did remember, Brennan had nothing to explain the way knowing they were leaving made her feel. It wasn't like she'd never see them again, and of course there was the reality that she could see them whenever she asked, but everything was still completely up in the air. Struggling to make sense of it all, she shook her head to clear the thoughts that troubled her.
What she did next surprised them both, as Brennan took the few steps needed to clear the space between them and hugged him tight. Booth, too startled to do much else, wrapped both arms tight around her and held her close for that moment. Whatever her reasoning was, he found himself unwilling to complain.
The warm night air mixed with the scent of his cologne, and for a few brief seconds, Brennan let herself linger there with her cheek pressed softly against his shoulder. Safe was something she felt now, but there with Booth she got a different feeling, which mixed with everything else she had left to contemplate. "Good night, Booth. I'll see you later."
If it was possible, he felt a little bit colder as she pulled away. Still, there was the slightest hint of hope lingering in her words, the mention of seeing him later that made him wish it would be that simple. "Night, Bones." He replied before calmly getting back into the truck. He watched as she took a few steps back, watching as he pulled away. I love you.
Brennan knocked gently on the door before a voice from within told her to come in. She pushed the door open. "This place appears to be much more organized than the last time I was here."
Sweets stood behind his desk and looked up as he heard her enter the room. He smiled a little and gestured to the walls around them. "I've put everything away, yes. Do you like it?"
She shrugged before grasping the back of the chair in front of his desk. "It's acceptable considering how little space you have. The university really couldn't provide a larger space for you?"
"Considering the fact my position wasn't considered as permanent until a few days prior to my coming here, no. I can't complain." Sweets replied before pointing to the chair. "Please, Doctor Brennan, make yourself comfortable." He grabbed his notebook and pen, but thought about it and set them back down. If he was able to make her feel more comfortable, she'd probably open up more, and that was his goal to begin with. Taking the seat next to her, he maneuvered the chairs so they'd be facing each other. "Have there been any improvements since we last spoke?"
Brennan noticed the way he was trying to remain professional, act more like a therapist rather than an old colleague or friend, and she wasn't sure what to make of the idea. "I was hospitalized due to stress, but I'm perfectly fine. Aside from the whole not remembering everything part, life is moving along smoothly."
"Are you sure?" Sweets asked, frowning at her response. He caught her look of confusion; a sign he had to elaborate. "You just seem kind of passive about the idea. You were hospitalized again, surely that must've been troubling."
"Oh, it was." Brennan hesitated a moment, unsure of how much more she could really say. "I was concerned, but my doctor assured me I'm physically healthy."
"But how are you mentally?" Sweets asked, shooting straight to the point. Again, he saw Brennan cross her arms and legs, a defensive mechanism. "I'm not trying to intrude, and again you don't have to admit anything you don't feel comfortable with. I'd just like to help. Was Booth there?"
Brennan nodded immediately. "He was there, as well as Angela, Hodgins, and the rest of my team."
"You say your team as if there's more there. Have you remembered something?" Sweets asked, hoping more than he probably should have that it was true. While he was supposed to remain completely objective about the situation as he tried to walk her through her past, there was still a side of him that wanted everything to come back sooner rather than later. Of course as someone helping her in a professional manner, it wasn't quite as acceptable.
Brennan stared down at her nails, pushing back a few of the cuticles, and she looked back at him. "Nothing remotely significant. That is to say I haven't recovered anything in regards to the team from the Jeffersonian. I said it that way because they're my friends, Sweets, and I care just as much for them as they do for me."
"I'm sure that's true." Sweets nodded in reply. "So, what is it that you did remember? Can you walk me through it?"
"Is it always this way?" Brennan asked, the question occurring to her all of a sudden. "I have remembered a few small things, but since remembering the accident I haven't recovered anything significant. I just feel..." She paused to search her mind for the correct word.
When she didn't finish the sentence in a way he expected, Sweets felt the need to help her. It wasn't his job to tell her how she was feeling, let alone put any thoughts in her head, but he had to do something that would help her along. "Stagnant?"
"Yes, exactly." Brennan perked up at the mention of the word. Until it sunk it what it meant. "I'm not moving forward or backward; I'm just here, in this time, waiting for something to happen. I know it's illogical, but I can't help but wish I could just skip this step. Move on to actually deciding what to do next."
Sweets shifted in his chair. He wasn't used to seeing Brennan so open and emotional, not counting the few times she'd burst her emotional seams in his office. It wasn't unusual for her to express herself, and she'd always gotten straight to the point, though there was no telling what would happen after that. Seeing her so open and fragile made him feel even more determined to push the whole situation forward. "First of all, what you feel right now is perfectly normal. I mean, your situation is unique to you, but it's normal to feel lost and without a sense of direction. You were already hospitalized for stressing yourself to your already thin limits. There's no need to do that again, so you need to be patient." He watched as she tucked a lock of hair behind her ear and stared back at him, almost as if she was willing him to hand her everything it was she still needed. This was a strong and at times fiercely independent woman he was dealing with, but she still depended on him for assistance. "You should focus now on the fact that you are remembering things, not that some parts haven't come back yet."
Brennan didn't want to talk about the feelings. In those small moments she had recovered, games with Parker or sending him home to Rebecca, there wasn't much that felt significant. Still, what seemed to be returning with them was something she'd never really experienced before. There wasn't a word she could think of that really described it, the rush of emotion that lingered just below the surface, sticking with her until she tucked the memory safely away. "Why hasn't everything come back yet? I've read studies in which people remembered right away, sometimes within days or weeks after waking up and recovering. Of course, there are always the people who never regain anything."
"You weren't any of those people in the studies." Sweets was quick to point that fact out. "I'd also like to mention the fact that some of your memories have returned. With medication and continued visits to see me, everything should be moving along smoothly. This isn't a process you should rush along, Doctor Brennan."
"Wouldn't you feel frustrated if this was happening to you? Wouldn't you feel as if you were on the outside looking into a situation that wasn't in your control?" Brennan replied, her voice tight with frustration. Her hands gripped the arms of the chair she sat in so tight her knuckles were turning white, little dents forming where the decorations in the chair kissed her skin.
"Totally." Sweets admitted before properly screening what he said. "Sorry, I'm just being honest." He continued after seeing the hurt look in her eyes, wanting to do the best he could to reassure her. "What you feel is normal. That shouldn't discourage you at all. However, I'd like for you to work a little bit at lowering your anxiety levels, because I think that might have caused you to be admitted into the hospital."
"You think?" Brennan laughed sarcastically. She winced, feeling a metal prong from the chair start digging into her palm. Pulling her hand away, she lifted it carefully to her eye level for inspection. "There are some things you don't need a doctor for. That is to say, one who works in sciences of the mind, which can hardly be considered science in the first place."
Sweets nodded after realizing he should have seen that comment coming. "You wouldn't be here if you didn't think I'd at least be helping you somewhat. Your relationship with Agent Booth, your husband, seems to be the thing that troubles you most. We could bring him in if you'd like-"
"No." The word left her lips before Brennan had time to really let it register. "I need to do this on my own."
"I realize that, but I was going to say that perhaps Booth could provide some insight. It might be beneficial to your recovery. It's up to you." Sweets shrugged. The idea of the three of them sitting in the same room, huddled around a coffee table with them on one side and him on the other, both thrilled and scared him at the same time. Progress had indeed been made since he'd moved on his his career, but somewhere along the way it had left her behind. He knew he'd probably be feeling just as lost and unsure about the situation as she was, even if he might be going about it on a different level. Brennan thought differently that he did. That within itself would prove to be one of the most difficult things to overcome in their sessions together.
Brennan mulled it over in her head. Of course Booth would have been more than willing to help her. However, there was still the growing reality that she wasn't sure of how to act around him. He was her friend and partner, but he was also something more. Her husband. She'd yet to really grasp the concept aside from the fact it was true. He loved her. That was plain to see each time her looked her way, even if he'd promised to let her process at her own pace. Maybe it was true that she owed him at least something in return, though she wasn't sure what, and even if she could there was no guaranteeing Booth would take it the right way. "Sweets, I appreciate what you're trying to do here, I do. However, under the circumstances, it's important that I recover on my own before bringing anyone else into the situation."
"He's already in the situation." Sweets countered. He knew he was being argumentative, but something had to make her see the point. "Eventually, if you haven't yet, you'll have to face that fact. If you can get past whatever mental block it is that's preventing any further recovery, I believe it shouldn't take too long for everything to return."
