End of Chapter 32
Charlie squeezed my hand, and Edward gave me a one-armed hug. I blushed, and as I lowered my eyes, I noticed Charlie and Sue's legs wrapped around each other a bit under the table. Glancing up, Sue winked at me and Charlie blushed a bit. Yes, this time was going to be much different.
Chapter 33: Just Might Make Me Believe (EPOV)
As the next three months of chemo began, I racked my brain trying to remember what it was like last time Charlie went through chemotherapy. Then I realized why I couldn't. Bella wasn't a part of my life yet. So instead, I ran through those first months of knowing Bella with a new perspective. I saw how introverted she was, and how she didn't seem to let anyone in. I thought back at looking at the girl who sat next to me every day in Biology, and how the circles under her eyes grew darker, her cheeks sallower, and the life drained from her eyes. I could feel the tears prick my eyes, now not seeing a stranger I tried to befriend, but as my Bella.
I looked over at my clock to see that it was eleven and grabbed my phone off my nightstand.
If you are awake still, please call me. ILY. – E
My phone rang a moment later.
"Edward?" Her voice was tentative and on the edge of sleep. I let out the breath I was holding, long and slow. "Are you okay, baby?"
"Yeah," I squeaked out, before coughing to clear my throat. "I'm fine. Just thinking, and needed to hear your voice. I needed to know you were okay."
"I'm fine, baby," she said. "You gonna tell me what brought this on?"
"I was just thinking about the last time Charlie was in chemo," I said softly.
"We weren't really friends yet. You can't remember much of that," she said confused.
"I remember you," I said, the tears sliding down my face to my ears. "Bella, I need you to be honest with me over the next three months. Baby, if you need something, or if you are worried, or if you just need me to come over in the middle of the night to hold you, you have to tell me."
"Okay, Edward," she said quietly, and I could hear the tears in her own voice.
"I can't see you fade into what you were last time," I took a deep breath to steady myself. "Last time, I watched that as a stranger, though I tried to be your friend. I love you so damn much now, I just can't…I can't…"
"Shhh…" Bella soothed. "It won't be like last time. The last time I was alone. We were alone. Every second I was away from Charlie I worried. I had no one to turn to. No comfort. No friends I felt I could trust with this burden. That is not the case now. Compared to this past fall, Edward, I am so wrapped in love, that I could never feel alone or isolated. But most of all, baby, I have you. I could face anything with your support and love."
"I feel the same way, Bella," I said exhaling. "Thanks for calling me. I feel better now."
"You're welcome," she said through a smile. "Just know you will be returning this favor one hundred times over in the next three months."
"I will scale the side of your house, if you need me to," I said, and she laughed. "Go to bed, sweetheart. I will see you in the morning."
"Good night, Edward," she said softly.
"Good night, beautiful. I love you."
"I love you, too. Bye."
"Bye."
I clicked my phone shut, reaching out to plug it back into the charge and resting it on my nightstand. I lay there a while thinking about Bella and how my life had changed since moving to Forks. If you would have told my former cocky seventeen year old self that I would have found a girl who I now believed to be the love of my life at this age. A girl who I would care for while her father fought for his life, that I would care for while sick, and who my family would love so much; I would have laughed. But I was that guy. I would do anything that equaled Bella's happiness. I would do anything to see her smile. With that thought in my mind, I drifted off to sleep.
The next morning came with a promise of spring in the air. It was a damp morning, but the sun was trying to peek through the clouds. I got up early, because I needed to load up my baseball equipment into my trunk before we left for school this morning. Today was the first day of conditioning for baseball. Actual tryouts were in two weeks. I was bouncing in my seat at breakfast. I loved to play ball, and was feeling a bit like a kid, anxious and eager.
Alice and Emmett were riding into school with me, but they would be going home with Rose. I would bring Jasper home with me from baseball practice. Bella was driving herself to school today, so she could take Charlie to his first chemotherapy appointment.
"Have fun and good luck today at baseball," Carlisle said patting me on the shoulder as he passed me in the kitchen.
"You do good work today, too," I said giving him a nervous smile.
"I will, son," he said firmly grasping my shoulder and giving me an understanding smile in return.
When I got to school, Bella was already in the lot looking anxiously for my car. I laughed a little to myself, but shifted to a huge grin when I saw my girl's face light up upon seeing me. That is the light that I couldn't see dim in the following months. That is the look that I would do my damnedest to preserve. As soon as I pulled in, she was out of her truck and at my side.
"Good morning, handsome," she said reaching up onto her toes to give me a soft kiss on my lips.
"Good morning, beautiful," I said pulling her close to me to leave a deeper, searing kiss on her mouth.
"Wow," she said closing her eyes and shaking her head to clear it.
"I need more than a peck to get me through to lunch," I said winking at her and draping my arm over her shoulder before walking up into the school.
"Ready for today?" Jasper asked walking up next to us, Alice's hand in his.
"You know it," I said bumping his free fist with mine.
The morning went quickly in my eagerness to get to lunch and talk to Jasper some more. Bella sat and conversed with Alice as Jasper and I chatted animatedly about what kind of team Forks had this year, and who was my competition for my favorite position in left field. I don't even remember at what point in our talking that Bella managed to sit herself between my legs, but I realized as the bell rang that I had been unconsciously rubbing her arm and playing with her hair as I talked standings and practice schedules.
"I'm so sorry I was so absorbed at lunch," I said as we walked into Biology and settled into our seats.
"It was fine, really," she said beaming. "I love it how you get when you are passionate about something you love. You just light up."
"Then you must see that look all the time," I said brushing my thumb on her cheek.
"Edward," she scoffed, rolling her eyes. I winked and squeezed her hand before the bell rang, and we settled into class.
At the end of the day, I hurried out to the lot to give Bella a quick kiss before she had to leave to go get Charlie for his appointment. I waved as she pulled out of the lot, and then turned to grab my things from the truck of my car and head to the locker room.
Conditioning was a split between the weight room at the school and doing some running on the track. We weren't allowed to actually pick up gloves and bats for another week. I saw right away that I need not worry about my spot on the team. Forks had a solid team, but no one was as fast as I was. Jasper was a close second, but he was strictly an infield man. After our two hours were up, Jasper and I were packing up heading to the car, when we over-heard the coach talking to his assistant.
"Who are we going to get to keep the score book this season now that Emily has graduated?" He asked. "Know anyone?"
"Not really," the assistant, Paul, shrugged.
"Coach," I said turning. "I think I might know someone. I need to ask her, though. She has some home obligations."
"Bella?" Jasper asked. I nodded, and he smiled. "She does know her stuff, coach."
"You talking about Swan?" Coach asked.
"Yes, sir," I said. "She has to help her dad on Wednesdays, but our games are on Tuesday and Thursdays, right?"
"Yeah. You ask her and get back to me," he said nodding and turning back to Paul.
"Way to insure your girlfriend is at all your games, slick," Jasper said punching me in the shoulder on the way out to the car. I shrugged innocently, and he just laughed.
I did ask Bella if she wanted to do it, and with Charlie's encouragement, she agreed. Charlie talked animatedly with me about this season. He had been the captain of the Forks baseball team back in his day. He was hoping that he was well enough to see as many of our games as he could. Bella smiled at the prospect, remembering how Charlie didn't even want to leave the house the last go round of chemo.
So, we settled into a busy spring schedule. I had practice or games after school Monday through Friday. Bella took Charlie to his treatments on Wednesdays, and then she would be at the games to keep the books on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Charlie did make quite a few of the games with Sue at his side. Bella would wear her dad's old jersey, and he gave me a proud smile to see that we shared the same number. Charlie and I had found a whole new level of bonding with baseball. He was as proud of me as Carlisle was, and I took it as much to heart.
Bella was a natural fit with the guys on the team. She kept them in line, and rolled her eyes at their flirting and attempts to make me mad or jealous. I just rolled my eyes. I was surprised that I didn't even feel a twinge of jealousy. Mostly I was amused at how oblivious Bella was to how beautiful she was, and how many bastards on this team were wishing they were me. The only time I let my anger flare was the one time James made an off handed comment asking if Bella was as good as she looked. One hard shove into the lockers and a reminder to never fucking say that again, and he cowered apologizing saying he was just making conversation. I wanted his conversation, and the rest of his shady ass anywhere near Bella.
Unfortunately, things weren't always great in the next three months. There were a couple nights when Bella called me quietly crying when Charlie had been up throwing up in the night. I could almost hear him retching in the background. She would have me wait on the phone while she check on him, and I would stay on with her until Charlie was settled back into bed, and then would hum her to the edge of sleep before hanging up.
Sue and my mom kept the Swan house stocked with dinners, so Bella was free to be a teenager, and enjoy her after school activities. I often would go over after practice to study or hang out with Bella for an hour or two. She would always have a plate waiting for me. I noticed that Charlie always waited to bathe on nights that Sue was there, and if not Sue, than myself. I think he was hedging his bets, so if he became too weak to get out of the shower on his own, one of us would be there to help, so Bella wouldn't have to do it.
I couldn't help but notice that Sue was staying the night whenever she could get away. The way that Charlie looked at Sue, I had a feeling that once he was well, and feeling like a strong, able man again, that he would ask Sue to marry him. One night I brought this up to Bella.
"So, when do you think Charlie is going to make Sue an honest woman?" I asked as I flipped through my math homework. Bella snorted on her Dr. Pepper, and started choking. I was immediately up and patting her on the back.
"An honest woman? Honestly, Edward…who says that anymore?" She said through barely controlled laughter.
"It's not that funny," I pouted giving her sides a tickle causing her to squeak.
"I don't know," she said finally through calming breaths. "I'll be happy if he does."
"They seem to be a perfect match for one another," I noted.
"Yeah," Bella said with a smile looking in the direction of the living room where Sue and Charlie were curled up on the couch watching a movie. "Despite the treatment, he is so happy now, Edward. You didn't know him before. It was like he was always in mourning. Mourning the only chance he thought he had at real love. But now…he's so happy. It radiates out of him."
I bit my lip trying to hold back commenting on her last statement. It clicked for her, and she glared at me.
"No cancer jokes, Edward."
"Sorry," I whispered, returning to my homework.
We fell into a comfortable silence as we both worked, before I cleared my throat once more.
"So, May is just around the corner," I said looking up at her.
"And?" She asked wondering what I was referring to, then a look of dawning crossed her face. "Oh, don't worry. Sue and Leah said that they can take Charlie to his appointment if you guys make it to district, regional, state." She said with a glimmer in her eye.
"That is great. That would be great," I admitted. "but that is not what I was going to ask about."
"Then what?" She asked now confused.
"Prom, Bella," I said smiling my most charming smile. Bella groaned. "Come on, baby. You agreed already! Plus, don't you want to see me in my tux?"
"Wait, your tux. You own a tux," she said.
"I do," I said.
"What's all this tux and 'I do' business out here?" Charlie grumbled walking into the kitchen. "Boy, do you have something you need to ask or tell me?"
"No, sir!" I said throwing my hands up in defense. Sue came giggling in behind Charlie. "We were just talking about prom, sir."
"Better be all," Charlie mumbled putting dishes in the sink, and Sue smacked him lightly on the back, hissing his name.
"Alice is leading the prom committee, Bella," I said turning my smile back to her. "Resistance is futile."
"I shall go with you to prom, Edward," she said. "I will even try to enjoy myself, as long as Alice doesn't put me in anything too ridiculous. Stupid Jasper bet."
I picked up her hand, and kissed the back of it slowly, before I heard Charlie clearing his throat behind me, and I sat bolt upright, remembering where I was. Bella laughed, and I shot her a glare before winking. Not too long after, I was packing up my stuff to head home. Bella followed me out to my car.
"Please don't be too much of a hard ass with me about prom, love," I pleaded as I leaned up against my car, pulling her body flush to mine. "I just want a perfect evening with my beautiful girl."
"Well, when you put it like that," she said leaning in to kiss me.
Her arms reached up around my neck, and dug themselves into my hair. Our kiss was deep and slow. We were enjoying the feel of each other's body pressed into the other. I released myself to the feeling of the texture of Bella's tongue as it slid against and tasted mine. My arms pulled her tighter, as affection shifted to longing, as it often did these days. Soon, we broke apart panting, but keeping our bodies clutched tightly to each other.
"Edward," she breathed heavily looking up at me, her desire burning bright.
"I know, baby," I said tracing her cheek and lips with my thumb. "We'll find our moment when it is right, and it will be right for us, Bella. I love you so much."
"I love you, too," she said, and I felt every ounce of it, as I placed one final kiss on her lips before sending her back inside.
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A/N: Well, friends, we are drawing towards a close. There is just one chapter and the epilogue left. I appreciate everyone who has stuck with me through this.
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