The Tower of Ishal. The horrific screams of the dying. Black blood on her hands, on her face and the stench of death in every direction. The ogre; drool and blood in equal measures on its monstrous face. Alistair's blade, sinking into its skull with a wet, sickening crack. And then her own warm blood splattering her face and coursing down her chest as the darkspawn arrow pierced her.

Then blackness. Impenetrable and endless.

In that inky nothing, nightmares. Screams. Tamlen's face, reflected in the swirling mirror. Alistair's voice shrieking her name. And always, in the distance, the dragon. Blue-violet fire and scales the color of a horrific bruise. It was the color pain was, when it had gone on so long that everything else was only a memory and pain was the whole world.

Kaei struggled up through the darkness. The light broke through, like dawn after the longest night she had ever known. Her eyes fluttered open. Over her head, there was thatch and white wash, log beams. She sat up slowly. The world spun for a moment before her eyes focused. A fire burned in a rough pit set into the wall. Morrigan stood nearby, sliding a book on to a rickety shelf. She turned.

"Ah," she said softly. "Your eyes open at last."

"Where am I?" Kaei asked.

"You are in the wilds," Morrigan explained. "And safe."

"But what happened, the battle and the darkspawn?" Kaei said frantically.

"The man who was to answer your signal . . . quit the field. Those that were left behind were massacred. The darkspawn won your battle," Morrigan said. She seemed as if she was trying to deliver the news with care, but somehow tact appeared to be beyond Morrigan's skill.

"And the King? Duncan?"

"All dead, I'm afraid," Morrigan said.

"Then," Kaei asked, "How am I alive?"

"Mother rescued you and your friend from the top of the tower."

"My friend? You mean Alistair?"

"Yes," Morrigan snorted. "The suspicious dim-witted one that was with you earlier. He is outside by the fire, no doubt still digging a furrow into the earth with his pacing."

Kaei scrambled out of the bed and spying her leather armor on a table nearby, tried to dress herself. Morrigan watched her in silence, but then stepped forward and helped Kaei with the laces when she saw her fingers trembling and fumbling.

"Mother asked to see you when you woke," Morrigan said, threading the leather laces through the grommets at Kaei's shoulder. "And no doubt your friend will be pleased to see that you are still alive."

"Why did your mother save us? How did she save us?"

"As she tells it, she turned into a giant bird and snatched you from the tower, one in each talon," Morrigan said. "If you do not believe that, you will need to ask her yourself. But as for why? Perhaps you were the only ones she could reach. I do not know for certain. You should speak with her. Maybe she will give you more of an answer than she gave me."

"I will do that," Kaei said as she tied the last of the laces. She started towards the door, but then stopped and turned back to Morrigan.

"Oh," Kaei said. "And thank you Morrigan."

Morrigan looked puzzled, but pleased. "You are welcome."

Kaei opened the door slowly. Although it was dusk, her eyes watered a bit at the brightness. Closing the door behind her, she looked around. The hut was on the edge of a marshland with open water on three sides. Alistair stood staring out over the water, unmoving. Morrigan's mother poked at a fire burning in a small circle of stones with a stick. The smoke smelled strange as it wafted over Kaei. Wood and sage, she recognized, but another scent like a dark poisonous flower was mixed into the fragrance.

"And here is your other Gray Warden," Morrigan's mother said, catching sight of Kaei. "You worry too much young man."

Alistair spun around. "You,' he said, his voice catching in his throat. "I thought you were dead."

"It takes more than a few darkspawn to kill me," Kaei said quietly. "Really, I'm fine." A wash of relief came over Alistair's face, but it was quickly overwhelmed by grief. "Thank you for your concern, Alistair," Kaei added as he turned away from her.

"If it wasn't for Morrigan's mother, we'd all be dead. Just like the king. Like Duncan," Alistair said Duncan's name with the sort of reverence most reserved for their gods.

"Do not speak about me as if I am not here."

Alistair turned to Morrigan's mother. "I'm sorry. It's just that you never told us your name."

"Names are pretty, but worthless," she said. "The Chasind folk call me Flemeth, and I suppose that will do."

"Flemeth? The Flemeth?" Alistair said. Kaei looked confused. The Flemeth? What did that mean?

Flemeth chuckled. "Tales are funny things. But who I am is not what you should worry about. You have a Blight to end."


Reluctantly, Morrigan had agreed to Flemeth's insistence and come with them. She didn't seem happy about it, nor did she seem unhappy about it. She was . . resigned to it. They were headed to Lothering, a small village north of Ostagar. Kaei was glad to be moving. The thinning forest as they made their way north gave way to farmland. She expected to see farmers in their fields, children playing and pointing at her. But the fields and farm holds were deserted.

There were a few corpses of cattle in the fields, broken and half burnt wagons. Beyond that, they were alone. With one happy exception. Shortly after they'd come to the Imperial Highway, a huge brindle Mabari hound had bounded out of the brush with a pack of darkspawn on his heels. They easily dispatched the darkspawn with the assistance of the hound who was as vicious as Kaei's twin daggers. Once the last of the darkspawn lay dying, the hound had laid down at Kaei's feet.

"I think this is the hound from back at Ostagar," Alistair commented. "It looks like he's chosen you; Mabari are like that."

Kaei named the hound Laethie, which was Tamlen's pet name for her. It was a bastardization of the Dalish words for friend and heart. It was a name he only called her in private. Kaei was glad that neither Alistair or Morrigan asked her what it meant, because she wasn't sure she could have told the tale and kept her composure. As it was, Laethie suddenly became a part of Kaei as much as her heart was, and his smiling doggy face at her side lifted her spirits more than she expected.

Morrigan too, despite her verbal complaints about the beast, seemed to enjoy Laethie's company. Kaei suspected Morrigan of throwing scraps to him more than once, but only when Morrigan thought no one else was watching. Kaei did catch her once, feeding Laethie a strip of dried meat from her pack. Morrigan caught her eye and winked, before spewing a string of profanity at the dog worthy of a pirate.

It would have been funny, if it wasn't for Alistair. It was true that she hadn't known him for long; only a day before the battle at Ostagar and now only a few more days since she awoke. But Duncan wasn't the only good judge of character in Ferelden. Kaei knew this sullen silence was not Alistair's way. The friendly, flirtatious banter she'd enjoyed when they'd first met was gone as swiftly as the stars at dawn. She felt a strange pit in her stomach every time she looked at him and smiled. Mainly because instead of returning her smile, at best he would nod, but mostly he would just look away.

If she didn't understand what was going through his head as well as she did, she expected she would have been very angry at his silence. The task in front of them was monumental. Gather an army to defeat the Blight. Bring justice to Loghain. And beneath that, atone for her own crimes and help Tamlen's spirit find peace. Not to mention that she didn't even know how the Gray Wardens defeated a Blight beyond killing the archdemon. Although it certainly required skill, anyone could defeat a dragon. That much was clear from the tales she'd heard as a child. But somehow, she knew there was some reason only a Gray Warden could do the deed. But the creators only knew why, although she supposed the other Wardens had known as well. But the gods and dead didn't speak. Not to Kaei anyway.

But Kaei wasn't angry at Alistair. She'd gathered from the little they'd spoken that he regarded Duncan as a father. A father he'd never had, although she didn't know his story. She knew how that felt. Although Dalish tribes raised all children communally, there was still a strong bond between parent and child. She'd watched it all around her, her whole life. She didn't know what it was to have a father; her own was dead before she'd ever known him. But nonetheless, she felt a pang of loss whenever she thought about it.

And she also knew the pain of losing someone you loved. She knew it every moment. In the quiver on her back there was one arrow she'd stitched into the leather, so she wouldn't accidentally use it. An arrow she'd found on the floor outside the mirror room in the ruins. One of Tamlen's arrows. It was clumsily fletched and the tip was bent. But that didn't matter. To her it was the most beautiful thing in the world. She resisted the urge to hold it when they'd stop to camp, but she found herself staring at it when her quiver lay on the earth at her side. It was a symbol and reminder. She might have a greater duty now, as one of the two remaining Gray Wardens in Ferelden, but it wasn't altruism than drove her. Always it was Tamlen.

They ran into highway men at the gates of Lothering. And atonement or not, she felt no guilt at cutting them down. How many had they harmed before she dispatched them? She felt a certain pleasure at knowing they'd harm no one else. Even one traveler spared was another step towards doing what was right.

They came down a ramp on to a sort of balcony over looking the village. It was small; the houses and shops clustered close together, surrounded by a rough log fence. A chantry with rose tinted windows was perched in the middle of the village. Kaei might not believe in the Maker any more than any other god, but their temples were certainly beautiful. On the distant blue hills, a large estate sprawled, likely the home of the leader of this region. A Bann, Morrigan had explained. While Alistair followed them in pained silence, Morrigan had spent the time explaining to Kaei the politics and history of Ferelden that she had read in her mother's books. It was comforting to Kaei to know that she wouldn't seem a complete idiot as they ventured into human lands.

"Ah Lothering," Alistair said out of nowhere, "Pretty as a picture." He rested his hands on the short carved wall.

"So you've finally decided to rejoin us," Morrigan sneered. "Falling on your blade in grief seemed like to much trouble after all?"

"Is my being upset so hard for you to understand?" Alistair spat at her. "Haven't you ever lost anyone before? Just what would you do if your mother died?"

"Before or after I stopped laughing?" Morrigan snickered.

"Right, very creepy. Forget I asked," Alistair said, defeated.

"You have been very quiet, Alistair," Kaei said softly.

"I know," He said, turning away from Morrigan to face her. "Mostly I was just thinking."

"No wonder it took so long," Morrigan quipped.

Alistair spun back to her. "Oh right, is this the part where we are shocked to discover you've never had a friend in the world?"

"I can be friendly if I wish," Morrigan snarled. "But wishing to be more intelligent does not make it so."

"Right, never mind," Alistair said, thwarted.


They discussed their options. Kaei did feel some urge to seek out her own people first, but Alistair was probably right. The human lord, Arl Eamon, was their best first step. And interestingly enough, Alistair knew the man. He'd been raised by him after his mother, a servant at Redcliffe Castle had died and before being sent to the chantry. This was an interesting turn of events, in Kaei's mind anyway. He hadn't elaborated much. He didn't seem ready to speak yet.

Although there was no available room to sleep in the village, they found a tavern with ale still available. Kaei had hoped for a rest, but first she'd had to nearly kill some of Loghain's men. And had found any unexpected ally. A former sister at the Lothering chantry, who could fight like a demon. She speed with a blade rivaled Kaei's. She was tall and curvaceous, with beautiful auburn hair and had a warm, inviting manner that Morrigan certainly lacked. Both Alistair and Morrigan clearly thought Kaei had lost her mind, but she'd agreed to take the woman with them. Leliana she'd called herself. Crazy or not, Kaei trusted her on sight.

Leliana had rushed back to her rooms at the chantry to gather her things, and Morrigan disappeared outside, to search for some ingredients for her potions. Kaei wasn't going to complain or stop her, since Morrigan's tinctures had proven to be shockingly effective in healing wounds.

That left Kaei and Alistair at the one remaining open table, tucked into a corner of the tavern just outside the light of the lamps and the fire. Laethie lay curled at her feet. They barkeep had given the mabari a strange look, but didn't press the issue. Alistair's hands lay on the table on either side of his ale and he stared into his mug. His face was cast in shadow. They drank without speaking, although the quiet didn't seem as awkward as Kaei expected. She realized, to her amazement, that she had begun to think of him as a person and as Morrigan had called him, her friend. Not just a human; a shemlen. Even thinking that word left a bitter taste in her mouth.

"Do you want to talk about Duncan?" Kaei asked finally.

"You don't have to do that," Alistair replied. He looked up at her. For the first time in days he was able to meet her eyes without looking away. Maybe it was the darkness; Kaei couldn't be certain.

"You just look like you need to talk," Kaei said.

"It's just that . . . I feel so guilty. I feel like I should have been there with him. Like I could done something. But then of course, I'd be dead. And it's not like that would make Duncan happy. I'm an idiot," he blurted out in one breath.

"No, you aren't," Kaei said, reaching across the and gently touching the back of his hand. He looked startled for a moment, but then he turned his hand over and closed his fingers around hers. Kaei smiled sadly and squeezed his hand.

"Have you ever lost anyone?" Alistair asked.

"Yes," Kaei replied. "I've lost enough to know what you are going through."

"You know, I wish we could have a proper funeral for him. He didn't have any family that I know of," Alistair said.

"He had you," Kaei said.

"I suppose he did," Alistair said. A sad half smile graced his lips. "I wish too that I had something of his, a token to remember him by. Something I could take with me. That sounds really stupid, doesn't it?"

Reminded of the arrow sewn into her quiver, Kaei replied, "No, it doesn't sound stupid. Not at all. I understand, more than you think."

"I think his people were from Highever," Alistair continued. "Maybe when this is all over I can go there and do something for him. Not that there's a body, or ashes," he paused. "Your people don't practice cremation do they?"

"No, we bury them in the earth and plant a tree over their remains," Kaei explained, thinking of a tiny sapling she planted in Tamlen's honor, though there was no body in the earth beneath.

"That's beautiful; life springing from death," Alistair said. "I think Duncan might have liked that." The half smile on his face blossomed into a genuine smile. It looked like the sun reappearing from behind a cloud. And when Alistair smiled it lifted her heart as much as Laethie's wagging stub of a tail ever did.

"Thank you. Really, I mean it," Alistair said, "It was good to talk about it at least."

"Any time Alistair," Kaei said. "We're in this together, right?"

"Right," he replied. His smile finally reached his eyes. Kaei was shocked to realize that he was handsome when he smiled. Not handsome for a human, not just because he was he only real friend besides her dog she had left in the world. Just because he was.

It was only then that Kaei realized she was still holding his hand.