A/N: I was so encouraged by the reviews you guys left on Tuesday I wrote Chapters 14 & 15, yup I am that far ahead. Ya'll are truly great!!!
Steph – ya know I love you hard right. If only we could find our own Vetward…sigh…
Disclaimer – Stephenie Meyers owns all that is Twilight.
Chapter 7
The First Run Back
BPOV
Days turn into weeks and weeks turn into months. It is almost fall now, school will be starting soon.
To say that this has been the best summer I've ever had would be an understatement, especially since so many wonderful and glorious things have happened. I am riding Phoenix every day. She looks beautiful, her eyes have a spark in them that wasn't there when I first saw her on the reservation. Her once dull yellow coat now shines like polished gold and she has gained most of her much-needed weight as well.
I've also been seeing a lot of Jacob Black. After our first date, we went on a second, then an third and so on. Jake is warm and caring. He treats me differently than any man has before – he treats me as if I'm something special. I know he feels more for me than I do for him, it is evident from the way he looks at me. I honestly wish I could feel more for him, but I just can't.
My mind keeps wondering back to that day at the vet clinic, seeing flashing images of green eyes, bronze hair and the feeling of electricity. I never took Edward up on his offer of calling him…frankly he scares the shit out of me. Deep down I feel like he is the one...the one that will complete my soul making me whole again. I am nervous that if I do pick up the phone to call Edward Cullen then I will have to let all my walls down to allow him in. I just do not think I'm ready to open myself up for all the hurt that will surely come with giving my heart to someone again. I don't think I'm strong enough to survive if my heart is put through the wringer again.
I really didn't realize how damaged I had become during my marriage to James. I want to be better...I want to be that girl that takes life by the horns and says "FUCK EVERYBODY! I AM DOING THIS SHIT MY WAY." Until I am that girl again, I will not allow myself to fall into the temptations of one green eyed god.
Every day that Phoenix gets stronger and more confident, I do too. It is like our lives are now intertwined and we were always destined to be together, it is our time now. The time with Edward will come soon enough… that is if he even feels the same way I do.
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BPOV
Today is the day that Phoenix and I are no longer taking it slow around the barrel pattern. For weeks now Mom has had us out in the arena drilling, perfecting us as a team. Her favorite thing to say is "Bella you have to learn to walk before you run." That is exactly what we have been doing walking and sometimes trotting the barrel pattern for what seems like a hundred times a day.
"Alright Bells enough of this pussy footing around! I want you and Phoenix to show me what you got today. Nice, smooth and controlled, you got it?" I heard Renee yell from her milk crate, the make shift stool she has taken to dragging out into the arena so she can sit and dictate. Renee is either sitting on that infernal crate examining my every move or barking orders all the time, so I have started calling her the Barrel Racing Nazi; it seems fitting. Back to business Bella, mind in the game now. I chastise myself.
"Yea mom I think we can handle that!" I yell back at the Nazi as I gently stroke Phoenix's neck. I then lean down so I can whisper into her ear. "Come on girl we CAN do this." I feel every muscle tighten under me. Phoenix is no dummy. She is just as anxious as I am.
I walk her down the alley so I can get into a good position to run at the first barrel. I feel her heart rate increase under me. I take a deep breath, gather my reins and position my hand. Just like that Phoenix wheels around and we are like a bullet shot from a gun, running full tilt towards the first barrel. Holy shit! There is no way in hell she is going to rate herself down enough to make the turn, but it is like she and I are one. My body starts to act on its own accord, as I get to the spot that I know is Phoenix's rate spot. This is the place before the barrel that is crucial, in order for a horse to make a super fast, tight turn, the rate of speed needs to be gauged. The rate spot is where that happens. It is not necessarily a slowing down but a coming together place if you will.
In a split second several things happen at once: my body instinctively sits deeper into my saddle to let Phoenix know that we are going to turn. My inside foot, the one closest to the barrel, curves into her side to get her body in a bent position to prepare for the turn. I pick up the inside rein tucking her nose towards the barrel and before I realize it we are around the first barrel with lightening speed. The second and third barrels come easier. I just send her across the pen towards the second barrel, driving her forward with the gentle but urging kicking of my feet. I do the same to the third and just like that we are exiting the arena out of the same alleyway we came in.
The adrenaline is coursing through my veins and my heart is about to pound out of my chest. Fuck that was fantastic! I can hear my mother in the back ground whooping and screaming like a mad woman. Yup that confirms it, must have been a kick ass run! As I look towards Renee I see four other figures hanging on the fence I hadn't noticed before, cheering and yelling as well; Alice, Jasper, Rose and Emmett.
Renee comes running up, out of breath from all the yelling "Bella…oh my God! That was beautiful to watch! I knew you still had it in you! You and this mare were destined for one another, a perfect team." I am speechless. In all the years I have been running barrels my mom could and would always point out every single mistake in my run, but this time she is telling me that it was beautiful, perfect even. For the first time in years my heart is beating in my chest. I feel alive……
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"Bellllaaaaa!" Alice is screaming, jumping, waving her arms in the air and running straight for me as I dismount from Phoenix. I am still winded after that run and need a minute to catch my breath before I am assaulted by my force of nature cousin. She is upon me before I can even blink an eye. Damn that pixie is fast! "Oh… my… gosh Bella that was amazing! I am so happy we decided to ride out today, we almost missed your first run back!" Alice is vibrating with so much excitement that I can feel it coming off of her in waves. Alice has been living a blissfully happy life these past couple of months. She and Jasper started dating not too long after they found each again at O'Brien's. Truthfully I could not be happier for her, they genuinely are in love.
My face is starting to hurt from the big ass grin that is permanently plastered there. "Thanks Alice! It felt…wow….really…there are no words for how great that felt, almost better than sex!" A small giggle escapes my lips; I am giddy like a school girl.
Alice's eyes get wide with shock and a small chuckle escapes her lips. "Whoa, whoa, back up there Bella. I don't know that is a pretty dangerous statement! Sex between me and Jas…"
I quickly put my fingers in my ears, not wanting or needing to know anything about my cousin's sex life. "ALICE! That is a definite TMI! I so do not want to hear about you and Jasper's sex life." I shake my head hoping she gets the message.
Alice then waves her little pixie hand in front of me and rolls her eyes, "Oh Bella! Don't be such a prude. I know you and Jakey Wakey have gotten it on." My eyes get big and I glance down.
Alice gasps in amazement and throws her hand up to her mouth, looking at me incredulously…"Wait! What? Don't tell me…you guys have been hanging out a lot lately and you haven't gotten ANY yet? Bella how is that possible? The man is HOT!" She is stares at me disbelievingly.
My face is red and I can feel the heat radiating off of it. I shuffle my feet in the dirt. Why did this conversation have to go in this direction? I look around for something to divert the over-sexed pixie's train of thought when I realize I'm still holding Phoenix. "I…um….really do not have time to talk about this right now, Alice. I have to take care of Phoenix." It is foolish of me to think that Alice will drop this line of questioning that she is so intent on pursing. It doesn't hurt to try though.
Alice sighs, stomps her foot and pouts, "Fine Bella, but we are all going out tonight. It is Friday after all! We need to celebrate your first run back." I nod smiling meekly at the torturing Tinkerbelle in front of me.
Right when I am going to turn to walk Phoenix back to the barn I am grabbed from behind by two of the most massive arms ever. "Damn B that was hot…smokin hot!" Emmett has taken to calling me "B" because he said it is easier for him to remember. I have become rather fond of him in the months after first meeting him with Rose. He always knows how to make me smile even when I am having the shittest day ever. "Thanks Em, that means a lot to me." I hug him back; he really is like an oversized teddy bear.
I look over beside him to see Rose and Jasper are also there to offer their congratulations. "Seriously Bella that was fan-fuckin-tastic!" Leave it to Rose to be so colorful with her praises. She may be a rodeo queen, but her vocabulary is extensive in the more colorful words of the English dictionary.
"Bellarific when do you think you will be ready to enter your first rodeo?" What is it with the nicknames? I turn towards Jasper trying to answer him, but I really haven't thought much about when I was going to enter my first rodeo on Phoenix. "Well Jas, I am not real sure. Frankly I haven't given it much thought, since I have been out of the whole rodeo loop for awhile. I guess I need to find somewhere to go. I just need to get my feet wet again, so to speak." I really do need to find somewhere to go. I think Phoenix is ready. I know without a doubt I am.
Jasper is looking at me intently, "Well you know, there is a little pumpkin puller next weekend that Emmett and I are going to, you should just load up and go with us." Jas leans back against the rail of the arena, props one foot up and puts his toothpick he has been chewing on back in his mouth. "Think about it Bella. It will be good for you." He smiles that cocky ass grin that Jasper is famous for…but he is right.
A pumpkin puller is a small rodeo that does not have a lot of added money and the entry fees are low. That is definitely what I would need for my first run back, not a lot of pressure. "You know Jas…I think I will take you up on that. We will work out the details later, sound good?" I smile gratefully back at him and start to turn towards the barn so I can unsaddle and wash Phoenix down.
Jasper pushes off the fence, starts walking beside me to the barn. He puts one arm around my shoulder and in that Texas drawl he is so proud of says, "Sure thing Bellarific, we will have a good time. Alice and Rose are going too."
I turn back to look at my four friends, I wave at them as they are making their way to their vehicles. Alice yells over her shoulder, "Hurry up barn goddess, you still have to get dressed for tonight!"
I groan internally and wave my hand dismissively at her as I walk into the barn. God it feels good to be alive…
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End Note: So what did you guys think? It is extremely hard to put a barrel run to paper. I started to realize everything I do up there, LOL . Reviews make me happier then Bella's first practice run back. Next chapter will be up on Tuesday.
