Morrigan summarily refused to enter the tower.
"Are you mad?" Morrigan spat. "Do you know what those fool Templars wouldn't give to get their hands on me? I would not step into that tower, even if it was the last place in the world not swallowed up by the Blight."
"Fine," Kaei sighed. "You are probably right. Besides, its not as if I'm walking into a fight. I just have to get some mages, and be off again. You do know that they will likely have to bring Templars with them, right?"
"Tis true," Morrigan replied. "But then you will have a mongrel dog and a rather fetching bitch wolf in your party. You are a Dalish; and creatures are forever following us anyway." Morrigan made a point to glare at Alistair for effect.
Kaei gave Morrigan a pleading look. "Please, don't."
Morrigan blew out a breath in frustration. "You are a madwoman," she said. "Of all the . . . it is not my concern, of course. But you seem far too level-headed to be so foolish. You cannot forget, love and beauty are fleeting and meaningless. Survival has meaning; power has meaning."
"If you say so," Kaei said. But Morrigan did have a point. Love was, apparently, fleeting. It had run out of her life like a coward time and again.
"Go on then, and yes, I will keep an eye on your mongrel and your Qunari while you are gone; I will attempt to prevent them from creating too much havoc," Morrigan said. "Now go collect your mages before the ground opens up and swallows us."
With that, Morrigan turned away. Which meant Kaei needed to rejoin Alistair and Leliana and find a way to convince the moronic Templar on the dock to take them to the tower. Alistair still wouldn't look at her, but she did notice he was still conspicuously wearing his cloak, although he'd never worn it before. It was also warm enough that even Leliana had removed hers. Kaei realized there was a sheen of sweat on Alistair's forehead. He wasn't wearing the cloak to stay warm, that was certain. But what it meant? Kaei couldn't be sure. Leliana gave her a knowing wink.
There were some perks to being a Gray Warden, Kaei discovered. Although none too impressed by her stained armor and prominent tattoos, the Templar was easily convinced to take them to the tower. It seemed an odd posting for a man in armor, paddling a little boat across the lake, but Kaei didn't think on it much. That was until she caught the stench of death on the wind as they stepped out of the boat and headed towards the tower.
Kaei had wondered if it was just Morrigan that smelled of lightening, but she did expect all mages would have that fragrance. The coppery smell was there, but it was overpowered by the scent of blood. Alistair looked more nervous than he had before.
"Something is wrong," he said softly, finally breaking his silence, although Kaei wasn't sure he was really talking to her. "I can feel it. This place, it always feels strongly of magic, but it never felt like this when I was here before." Kaei had au unnerving feeling she'd heard those words before.
Kaei recalled his tale of the one Harrowing he had attended, right here in this tower. It was a grisly story. A young girl, barely a woman yet, cut down when she could not fight the demon within. Alistair told her that when the demon started to manifest, there was an overpowering scent of burning. Kaei sniffed the air. Blood and lightning. And fainter still, but unmistakably, sulfur.
"Can't anything be easy?" Kaei muttered.
Alistair snorted, glancing over at her. "Not likely."
Trying to ignore the strange lurch in her chest when he looked at her, Kaei stalked to the tower doors and threw them open. The foulness was far worse inside. An older man in well worn armor paced furiously, barking orders. Just beyond him were a pair of double doors. They were barred and barricaded with scraps of broken wood. Two more Templars with naked blades stood just outside, looking quite ready to attack should that door even twitch.
Not like I'm walking into a fight, am I? Kaei thought. Not sodding likely.
The abominations were ghastly. Not like Connor at all. Whatever that demon was trying to do to him had certainly not yet come to head. These things; there was nothing human or elven about them anymore. They were great hulking things with twisted faces and horrible blackened eyes. Yet somehow the Desire Demon was worse. With her shapely body and grim horns . . and the look in that enthralled Templar's eyes. . . . It shook Kaei to her core. Yes, he did not survive, but death was preferable to that. However, nothing she'd encountered thus far shocked her as much as the Beyond, or the Fade, as the mages insisted on calling it.
Duncan. The first human she had ever known, and ever trusted. And here he was, or his face anyway, animated by some dark force from her own mind. She hadn't realized truly until that moment how much she missed his wise silences and his steady presence. But she could spot a trap, when it was in front of her.
The dreamers. She fought with them and against them, bringing down demons at the heart of each dream. She'd never thought it possible; to wield magic was inborn and although in her blood from her father . . . she'd never entertained the idea. But here in the Beyond, magic was different. So she took the shapes the dreamers granted her and killed her way into her companion's nightmares.
The human mage, Wynne, who insisted on accompanying them was locked in her guilt. Leliana too, but hers was more subtle. But Alistair; she expected after freeing the others that he too would be trapped in a dark fear. But instead, he was so . . . content. She hadn't realized he had a sister; she wasn't sure he actually did. But here, in the deepest recesses of his mind, all he wanted was a family and a home. It broke her heart a little to destroy his fantasy. But surprisingly, he did seem genuinely happy to see her, and was willing to listen to reason. As he disappeared out of the Beyond as the others did, she knew it was time to face the Sloth demon who was master of this place. The disappointed look in Alistair's eyes when he realized his family was just a trap was enough to make her think that she might be able to kill the demon with just her will to do so.
And kill it she did.
She awoke on the floor next to the crumbled husk of the abomination and the sad, still form of the mage Niall who had helped her find the way out. She felt a pang of regret for not being able to save him too. Gingerly she slipped the scroll out of his clutched and cold hands.
"Thank you," she whispered. "Creators watch over you."
She turned away from his motionless form to find Alistair helping Wynne to her feet. No one spoke, there was no need. She saw in all of their gazes; Wynne, Leliana and Alistair alike, that she now knew something about each of them that they would have been loathe to share with anyone. It felt like a sacred confidence. She nodded and they all seemed to understand the gesture.
Yes, I know your hearts, Kaei's eyes said. And I will guard your secrets well.
"We must find Irving," Wynne said quietly, but with force. "And the only place left is the Harrowing chamber. Come, this way." Alistair visibly paled. This was clearly not a place he wanted to see again. But he gritted his teeth and followed in spite of his blatant uneasiness.
The Harrowing chamber was at the very top of the tower. It had only one entrance at the top of a short flight of ornately carved stairs. Inside a glassy shield of magic, a Templar cursed and ranted at the base of the stairs.
"Begone, foul demon! You will not break me!" he screamed as they came near.
"Cullen?" Wynne said softly. "Rest easy, help is here."
"If there is anything human left within you, kill me now," Cullen begged, falling to his knees. "You killed my brothers, twisted them into foul things, but I will not be broken."
"We are no demons, come to torment you," Kaei said softly. "Just tell us what's happened."
Cullen blinked at her, his fear melting into anger. "Uldred. He is in the Harrowing chamber, turning the few remaining mages into monsters. You must stop him. Kill him and everything else up there."
"What about Irving?" Wynne asked frantically.
"He is up there as well, but you can't save him. You can't take the chance of what they might do! Blood mages, sneaking their dirty fingers into your mind, abominations and Maker knows what else! Everything in the chamber must die!" Cullen was on the edge of hysteria.
"I won't kill someone for what they might do; never again," Kaei said softly. "Just . . well, just wait here and we will be back for you."
"No one ever listens, not until it's too late," Cullen said, defeated. "I hope your compassion does not doom us all."
Somehow, killing Uldred was less horrible than she expected. After what she witnessed in the Beyond, this was just . . battle. And battle what something she was becoming comfortable with. And despite Cullen's protestations, there were mages to be saved.
Once Uldred and the other abominations were dead, she helped the survivors back to the entrance to the tower where the Knight-Commander waited for Irving's word. With Uldred dead, the glassy case around Cullen collapsed. He followed without complaint, even helping Kaei support Irving as they descended the seemingly never-ending flights of stairs. But she watched carefully, and his hand never strayed from the hilt of the dagger at his waist. He clutched it so tightly his knuckles were white.
When Greagoir accepted Irving's assurance that the tower was safe, Cullen broke down. He ranted, screamed at his commander until Greagoir finally told him in no uncertain terms to shut up. Cullen's mouth snapped shut like a trap, but his fury was still plain in his eyes. He looked at Irving and Wynne as if any moment they would transform into hideous things that needed to be put down.
After acquiring another stray soul (Wynne insisted upon accompanying her, and Kaei was too tired to put up much resistance) and getting Irving's promise to help her with Connor, she was finally free to leave. As she turned to go, Cullen fiercely grabbed her elbow.
"Watch her closely, Warden," he snarled. "Wynne was in the tower for too long; she may be harboring a demon inside. On twitch, one wrong look and you need to put her down."
"I will not," Kaei spat, whirling around to face him and pulling her arm from his grasp. "Nor will you start to mete out justice for what might be." Cullen took an involuntary step back. Stamping down her anger, Kaei sighed sadly, and took a step closer. Cullen visibly flinched. Carefully, she raised her hand, and set it against his cheek. He flinched again as if he thought she might strike him, leaving just a hairbreadth between her hand and his face. Kaei did not move her hand, just left it there, floating in space. Cullen glared at her.
"I know that look in your eyes," Kaei said softly. "I have felt the hate you are feeling. But no good will come of it. I do not know much about your Maker, but from what I have learned, he is a god of forgiveness and justice. You cannot take a life just because of what someone might become or might do. I made that mistake once. It is a mistake that will cost you more than you know." Kaei furrowed her brow. "I can see you are a good man, under all that anger, or you would not be a Templar. But do not let fear blind you to what is right. Be better than I am."
Cullen made a choking sound and leaned his face into her waiting hand. "How?" he asked. "How?"
"I don't know," Kaei replied. "I only know that you must not let your anger control you. The price you pay is too high."
Cullen nodded. "I will try," he said. "And thank you." Kaei patted his cheek, and turned to leave again. Alistair stared at her for a moment. His face was unreadable, but as he turned to open the door, Kaei saw that his hands were shaking.
