Jacob Have I Loved

Chapter 27

Trailing closely behind Bella's red truck in my rental car, I noticed that she wasn't heading toward La Push at all. She was on her way back home to Charlie Swan's house. The realization worried me, and for several seconds there, I feared my plan had not panned out exactly as I had strategized.

Bella quickly dashed from her truck when she pulled up in front of her father's house. As she escaped the drizzling rain to the comfort of her home, I waited patiently, hoping by some miracle that she would soon emerge and continue on the path I had intended for her. I could hear the faint sounds of her voice murmur something about Jake to Charlie, and judging from the fact that his police cruiser was not in the driveway, I determined she was speaking to him on the phone.

Seconds later, Bella stepped outside the house and ran straight for her truck. She was headed toward La Push, and I took a deep breath, realizing that I would have to face seeing Jake again for the first time in seven months. My heart started to beat faster with hesitant anticipation as I pursued Bella's truck toward the reservation, the place I would always call my home.

Suddenly, my cell phone began to vibrate in the pocket of my jeans. Struggling to retrieve it from my pocket while driving, I finally was successful and pressed the small phone to my ear.

"Hello?" I began.

"Jessica, where are you, honey? I called Ashley and Ali's house, and they said they haven't seen you at all today." My mom's voice sounded full of concern.

"It's okay, Mom." I sighed, making a right hand turn at the edge of town.

"No, it's not okay. Where are you, Jess? I'm worried sick. Are you in any trouble?" After hearing my mother's frantic words, I decided just to go ahead and tell her where I was. She would find out sooner or later when she got the credit card bill with the charge for my rental car.

"Mom, don't be angry, but I'm in La Push." I anxiously awaited her response, still following Bella's truck at a safe distance across the border of the reservation.

"You're in La Push! How in the world are you in La Push? It's only been three hours since you left the house!" I could tell my mother wasn't buying my story. Her tone was full of disbelief.

"Mom, don't worry. I'm okay. I just needed to see the rez again. Say goodbye to some old ghosts. I promise I'll be home tonight. Love you." I closed my eyes for a brief second and then snapped my phone shut, tossing it into the passenger seat. I would deal with my mother later. I had to make sure my plans worked out for Bella and Jake first.

Several minutes later, Bella reached Billy and Jake's house. It was just as I remembered it—a small, modest home with faded red paint. A place full of memories for Jake and me. Memories I would never get to relive again.

I passed by the house as I watched Bella pull up in the driveway. I stopped a few blocks away to ensure I remained unseen, killing the engine of my hatchback. After a few seconds, I exited the car.

Taking the woods on the short trip back to Jake's house, I could hear his beautiful, husky voice exclaim, "Bella!" It thrilled my soul to hear him speak again after all this time. I had refused to take his phone calls when we moved to Sacramento. A clean break, I had to remind myself over and over again. Talking to him would only make me want to be with him more. I couldn't do that to either one of us. It wasn't fair to him, but it wasn't fair to ignore him either.

As I neared the house, I stopped dead in my tracks, my mouth agape. There he was.

There were no words to describe how seeing Jake again made me feel in that moment. If I could compare it to anything, it would be like seeing your first sunrise or sunset. He was absolutely breathtaking. His beautiful, russet-colored skin almost glistened in the muted sunlight, and his long, black hair hung down about his shoulders. He looked as if he had aged several years. My breath caught in my throat as I noticed that the muscles of his arms had grown more defined, and something in my gut made me regret ever coming back. He was just too gorgeous for words.

"Come inside! You're getting all wet." I heard Jake tell Bella, waking me from my drool session.

Bella wasn't the only one getting all wet if you know what I mean. I chuckled slightly as I felt the heat flush on my cheeks.

Several minutes passed, and Jake and Bella appeared again, walking toward the shed just beyond a large hedge beside the house. Crouching, I crept through the concealment of the woods, so that I could get a better view of them. They were talking about his Rabbit and how Jake was finally going to finish it soon. I smiled briefly, remembering the dreams I had of riding in that same vehicle and making love to Jake in the backseat.

Shaking away my thoughts, I watched as Bella and Jake continued their conversation. She had now changed the subject to the motorcycles, her foremost reason for even being there in the first place.

"We'll have a joint party to make up for it." I heard Jake say after Bella said something about missing each others' last birthday.

"Sounds like a date." She replied, and Jake's face lit up like the Fourth of July.

How dare that bitch say that to him? I could feel my anger begin to boil in my blood. What was I thinking trying to bring them together? This was just maddening. HE BELONGED WITH ME. The anger surged throughout my body, and I had to take deep, calming breaths to keep myself from changing into my wolf form right on the spot.

When I finally snapped out of my bitch mode, I could now see Jake guiding one of the bikes from the back of her truck into the garage shed. Then, he retrieved the other while Bella just stood there possibly in awe of Jake's strength. He looked so damn sexy lifting those bikes off the truck bed. I could've run to him and thrown him on the first flat surface I saw with Bella as a spectator, but I digressed and tried to fight back my desires for the moment.

Suddenly, an unfamiliar scent saturated my nostrils, and I could detect the approaching sound of something behind me as it crackled through the leaves and twigs on the ground.

"Jessica? Jessica Burnside?"

I spun around, only to behold my cousin, Sam Uley, standing right before me. He was wearing nothing but a pair of cut-off jean shorts, and even though he was related to me by blood, I couldn't help but marvel at his chiseled chest muscles.

"What are you doing back in La Push?" His expression was hardened, and he seemed older, more mature, than when I last saw him. It almost seemed as if he was accusing me of trespassing or something even worse.

I gulped, forcing my fear back down my throat. "I needed to see Jake."

"Are your parents here?" Sam looked around, sniffing the air as if searching for my parents somewhere in the woods. "Are you alone?"

"No, Sam. They're back in Sacramento. I came alone." As I said those words, Sam leaned in toward me, inhaling deeply. I must admit this made me a little uncomfortable, not to mention a little freaked out.

"There's something strange about you, Jess." Sam looked confused and angry.

"Nothing's strange about me." I abruptly turned and started to make my way back to my hatchback. Something about him made my stomach churn, and I wasn't going to stay and find out exactly what that something was.

"You're not going anywhere, Jess." He grabbed my arm from behind, pulling me under the cover of several overgrown bushes.

Fear almost crippled me at the sound of his incensed voice. I tried to think of some way to escape him, to get the hell out of there. The only thing I could think of was to wolf-out, and God only knew the consequences of that action.

Sam's grip tightened around my arm, almost cutting off my circulation. He sniffed my neck once again.

"What are you?" I could feel his hot breath on my neck, sending goose bumps across my arms and legs. I couldn't speak to answer his question.

"What the hell are you?"

As he presented his question a second time, it hit me like a brick wall. Sam was now a wolf too; that was the only logical explanation. Since we were cousins and both descendants of Levi Uley, one of the first shapeshifters, the same genes flowed through his veins as did mine. Finally, I had found a kindred spirit.

"Are you a wolf, Sam?" I peered up at him, anxiously awaiting his response.

A look of shock flashed across his face, and he removed his vice grip from around my left bicep.

"How did you know about that?" Sam crawled back on his hands and feet and then collapsed into a seated position a few yards away from me.

"Because I'm one too." I confessed, looking him in the eyes.

"No way." Sam stared at me in wonder, his eyes about to bug out of his head. "It's not possible. Harry told me only male Quileutes can turn."

Harry Clearwater. Of course, Harry knew about this. So did Billy. Why the hell didn't they say anything to me? I could've used some support all those months ago. Sam's revelation hit me like a forceful blow to the chest, and I couldn't help rolling my eyes in disgust.

"Well, he was wrong." I glanced back over at the garage. Jake was busy dismantling one of the motorcycles while Bella sat in the passenger seat of the Rabbit and observed. It looked like they were getting along just fine. "Sorry, Sam, but I need to go."

"Prove it." Sam cut me off as I turned to leave, that same angered expression greeting me.

"Sam, really I need to get back. Just take my word for it." I informed him, the frustration building up once again. Not only did I have to face my one true love hitting it off with another girl, but I also had to be inundated by my cousin and fellow wolf. I shouldn't have to prove myself to him.

"PROVE IT, JESS!" Something in the way Sam projected his voice that second time made me almost cower in fear before him.

Before I knew what was happening, he swiftly burst out of his shorts, and there standing before me materialized a massive, black wolf. He was huge, bigger than I ever could have imagined, and I felt the sudden urge to bow before him.

The Sam wolf let out a small, but intimidating growl, and I knew I had to prove to him that I was truthful before he would let me go. Not desiring for him to see me naked, I ran over to cover of several trees and quickly undressed. I concentrated hard on the myriad of emotions that I had experienced that day: anger, fear, sadness, despair . . . lust. Suddenly, the familiar burning, itching pain surfaced, and I transformed into my wolf form, emerging cautiously from the trees.

Unbelievable. I heard Sam's voice in my head. Did Sam just say something to me?

Yes, Jessica, wolves can hear each others' thoughts. Sam slowly moved closer to me, circling around me to get a full view. When did you first phase, Jess?

Phase? Well, I changed back in June, a few weeks before my parents and I moved to California. I sent my thoughts to him as I did to Ephraim those many months ago.

Wow, you changed before I did. Sam let out a small yelp.

Really? Did Ephraim Black visit you too? I couldn't help but be curious.

Ephraim Black? That's crazy, Jess. No, I sought advice from the elders. I could hear him chuckle in his thoughts.

Well, he came to me. Told me what I was and that I needed to break things off with Jake. I turned my attention to Jake and Bella. They were now talking about their friends and their school lives.

Break things off with Jake? Sam questioned, somewhat baffled.

Yeah, he said that Jake and Bella had a connection and us being together was detrimental to the future of our tribe. Whatever the hell that means. I rolled my eyes, still not fully believing in Ephraim's prophetic words.

You sure you weren't high, Jess? If you swing that way, I know a good meth dealer. I playfully nudged him with my paw, and he laughed, showing me his razor-sharp, jagged teeth. Hey, I was only kidding.

Shut the fuck up, Sam! I stuck out my wolf tongue at him. He also told me we were cousins, you and I.

Really? You mean, you're my cousin? How are we cousins?

My grandfather Burnside was Levi Uley's illegitimate child. Go figure. I looked back at Jake and Bella, noticing that two familiar figures were now walking toward the garage. Is that Quil and Embry?

Yeah, cuz. Sam laughed.

I thought I would never say this, but I miss those two almost as much as I miss Jake. I frowned on the inside, my heart dropping into my stomach.

What about Steph? You miss her?

Yeah, but we've kept in touch. I drooped my head toward the ground, deflecting my gaze. By the way, how are you and Leah doing?

Well, um . . . Sam's voice trailed off, and I know it sounds weird, but I could feel the sadness in his heart. It's complicated.

Oh, okay. I didn't press the issue, sensing that it was a touchy situation. What are you doing here anyway, Sam?

Keeping an eye on Jake. Sam confessed. You see, I've been acting as Alpha in Jake's stead. I'm waiting for him to change as well. Jared and Paul already have. Quil and Embry will eventually too.

Wow. I remembered Ephraim's words about Jake and how he would be appointed the Alpha of the tribe, the pack so to speak, one day. I completely understood Sam's reason for being there in that moment.

So, Ephraim told you that as well? Sam huffed and let out a low growl.

Yeah. I replied.

Well, Jess, I know that the council gave your father permission to move off the rez, so I won't bother you anymore. I know now that your place is not here. He turned as to leave. Thanks for your allegiance to Jake. I can read your thoughts and feel them almost as if they are my own. You care deeply for him, and I know staying here to join my pack would only hurt you worse. So . . . I'm letting you go.

I almost felt like crying, but I didn't want to appear weak before the acting Alpha.

Thanks, Sam. Those were the only words I could think to utter at the time. That would mean a lot to me. It's nice to know I'm not alone.

No problem, Jess. Sam retorted, walking towards the woods.

And don't tell Jake I was here, ok? That was the last thing I wanted.

Of course, cuz. After sending me those last thoughts, Sam's wolf body swiftly disappeared amongst the trees almost like a whisper, making hardly a sound at all.

"Jake, if I took these to a mechanic, how much would they charge me?" Bella's soft voice refocused my attention to the reason I came back to La Push.

"Okay, you're getting a deal." Jake responded.

"Not to mention the riding lessons." Bella supplemented, and the inside joke Jake, Embry, Quil, and I shared those many months ago flooded my mind once again. I closed my eyes, reminiscing about those times when Jake and I made love—the best lessons I ever learned.

"That's it, get out." I heard Jake say as a loud slap resounded into my ears. Since my eyes were closed at the moment, I could only guess that Quil was on the receiving end of that slap. Served the perv right.

Bella then told them she had to leave, and Quil and Embry made several taunting remarks as Bella sauntered back toward her truck. The sound of their jokes made me frown, and I knew it was time for me to leave as well. Soon enough, Bella would be back to see Jake's progress on the bikes and to help him buy the parts as they discussed earlier.

I rushed back behind the bushes and phased back, dressing myself when I had finished. Taking one last look at Jake, I noticed that Quil and Embry were nowhere in sight. Left all alone, Jake sighed, giving the dismantled bike a once over glance.

Then, for some unknown reason, Jake's head lifted in my direction, his beautiful, brown eyes staring right at me.

"Jess?" His voice loudly called to me.

SHIT! I ducked under the guard of the bushes again, hearing his footsteps crunch through the grass and fallen leaves toward me. DAMN IT ALL TO HELL! NO!

"OH MY GOD, JESS!"

Knowing that I had been discovered, I reluctantly stood up from my position behind the hedgerow, only to be welcomed by Jake's incredible, warm embrace.

ATTN: Quotes taken from New Moon by Stephenie Meyer, the goddess of my life. Please review.