Chapter 25 – Good enough for me

Since he told Juliet he loved her the relationship felt stronger. He was more certain about it and her. She felt the same way about him so he knew she wouldn't leave him.

They were not all over each other and telling each other how much they loved each other all the time kind of couple, and he liked it. They said it when they meant it, and when they were alone. It was at least once a day when they would say it, and he found that enough.

In public they rarely held hands, he would sometimes put an arm around her, but other than that they saved it for private. Apart from one night she got drunk and sat on his lap at a party, she was embarrassed about it the next day, he was proud.

One hot sweaty afternoon he was already having a bad day, he was stomping through the jungle not paying attention and fell into a ditch. When he landed at the bottom he swore a lot, loudly, felt for any broken bones and crawled out. Other than being filthy and some cuts and bruises he was fine. He radioed in that he was finishing his shift half hour early and went home.

He sure as hell wasn't going to the infirmary in this heat. He would end up sitting there for hours, and Horace would come in, and he would have to fill in forms of how he injured himself.

When he got in Juliet came into the room to see who had come in. Her eyes widened in concern as she rushed to him and started to prod and poke him. He told her he was fine and not in the mood.

She told him to sit the hell down and let her be the judge of that. She had told him in her eerily calm voice that worried him a little. So he sat at the dining room table while she fetched the first aid kit.

She carefully removed his jump suit and started to gently clean the cuts he had all over. He watched her work. She was calm and moved with purpose, but so gentle and caring. He told her he loved her and she shook her head and chuckled.

He continued to watch her, he imagined she would be good with kids. The little scrapes they got into, and her calm discipline would surely be good for a child. So he asked her if she wanted kids.

She looked taken aback by his question and lent back on the balls of her feet to look at him a moment to see if he was serious.

'People usually talk about this before they move in together James' Then she continued with her work of cleaning him up.

'Yeah well I ain't ever done this before' He sulked 'Just thought you would make a good Mom'

'I don't know James, when I was married I guessed I would be a Mom eventually. Then that all went to hell and I was so busy getting my sister pregnant, then I got here. Then it wasn't and option anymore'

'The women aren't dying anymore, or if we got home, what then?' He pushed.

'Honestly James I hadn't thought about it' She was getting annoyed 'Even if I did does it matter? We are stuck here. What happened if we did and there was a flash and the baby got left behind? What if I died?' She stopped working and looked at him for his answer.

'Well not here then, but what if we got home?' He held her stare.

'I think the question here is do you want to be a Dad?' She challenged him.

'Never have' He answered, and she broke his gaze to continue on the cuts, moving to the one on his face 'until you'

She looked him in the eye, waiting for him to continue.

'Hell Jules, It scares the hell outta me. I'm scared I'd shoot you both or just run away. But I like the thought too. The thought of us as a family. It may never happen but I just wanted to know if it ever could?' When she didn't reply he took it as a negative 'Forget it, I'd probably be a terrible Dad. Who wants to make babies with an ex-con anyway. I just wanna make you happy.'

He made to get up and she placed a gentle hand on his knee.

'Me James. One day, if we aren't too old, and we aren't time traveling, running from guns, smoke monsters or any other deadly peril. If we are still dedicated to each other and are some where stable. Then maybe we can consider discussing this. OK?' She smiled at him.

'That's good enough for me sweetheart' He pulled her in for a kiss . . . .

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Juliet felt closer to James now they had told each other how they felt. It sort of confirmed what it was between them, and made her feel more secure about it.

She liked that they were not a feely- touchy couple. They didn't need to be all over each other all the time, especially in public. They knew how the other felt and were there if they needed the other.

They didn't feel the need to tell each other constantly that they loved each other. Simple gestures and stolen touches conveyed the message in some ways. They said it at private times, when it really meant something to them both. One party James got a bit handsey on the dance floor, but he apologized the next day, knowing she didn't like it, but she secretly enjoyed it.

Pretty much everyone in the Dharma attended all social events, as there weren't many people there and even less to do. So one evening when walking home, hand in hand, from a engagement party Juliet asked him what he thought about marriage.

'You proposing Sugar?' He teased, stroking her backside with the hand he was holding hers with.

'No just wondering' She tried to sound not bothered.

'Well Jules I thought people talked about this kinda crap before they moved in together?' He bumped her shoulder and she slapped his chest with her free hand.

'Why can't you answer scardy cat!' She teased back.

'Why don't you go first?' He bumped her shoulder again. She was getting frustrated now, did he think she was trying to make a suggestion? She knew she better put him straight.

'I did believe in marriage, in loving someone forever, being faithful, becoming family. Until I got married' She looked down at the floor as they talked. He let go of her hand and pulled her close putting his arm over her shoulders. 'So now I don't believe in it. I think its an out-of-date ritual and I'd be happy never getting married again'

He kissed the top of her head and spoke into her hair 'I'm scared if I get married we will end up like my parents'

She pulled away to look into his eyes 'You are not your father' She told him, putting emphasis on each word. He stole a kiss and pulled her back under his arm.

'I agree, I think its out-of-date and a waste of money. It's also a lot of hassle if it doesn't work out. I like what it stands for though' Juliet laughed, then instantly felt guilty as he was being serious and trying to explain how he felt 'I like the thought of being true to you, and being bound'

'Well be true to me then James, and we will always have a connection. Marriage doesn't mean anything really. Its a ritual and a piece of paper. We can decide on what rules we want to follow' She felt cold for two different reasons as he let her go to go up the porch and open the door for them both.

'But if we made babies wouldn't you want to have the same last name?' He asked as she brushed past him into the house.

'Again with the babies James?' She cocked an eyebrow and smiled at him. 'Anyone would think you were broody'

'Am just trying to figure stuff out' He grunted and made towards the bedroom.

She grabbed his hand and pushed herself up against him, sliding her hands up his chest and around his neck.

'Yes James, I would like to have the same last name as my own children, but we don't have to get married for that' She kissed him quickly.

'I knew my genius would find a happy medium' He kissed her again.

'So we both vote no on the whole matrimony idea?' She held his gaze and gave him a small smile.

'Yes' He growled and started to kiss her neck. 'But it don't make you any less mine.'

'That's good enough for me' She replied before dragging him to their bedroom . . . .