AN- yo!! Okay ma homies! People who want to be a super hero/villain, just PM or review me with the name you want, power and costume! (Please don't choose one that is already done!). Anyways, please keep reading!!
Please review!
Disclaimer- I own nothing but my evil, mental, insane, crazy mind (where I strongly and stubbornly believe that Galaxy chocolate will one day rule the world (Mwahahahahahaaaaa!!))
Chapter 2- Emmett's Plans
Bella's POV-
After I explained to Edward about my very boring journey to the Cullen house, he tried (and FAILED) to stifle his girly-fied giggles, but I want having any of it (whatever 'it' is) so I bitch-slapped him (we do that a lot in this story, don't you think?!) across the face and then yelled in his ear,
"be a friggin' MAN, my lil' lemon meringue!!!" for no apparent reason before hitting him with my shoe and storming away upstairs to Emmett and Rosalie's room.
As I knocked on their door, it burst open and Emmet welcomed me in.
"Yo, baby! I gots a sick new plan for da effin' movie, doooolllllllll!!" he said while doing all sorts of crazy gangsta moves. Then, he slapped me on the back for some reason and I went flying across the room, through Rosalie's mirror and accidently swallowed a rose scented Chanel perfume.
I sat there choking while Emmett jumped up and down; talking like a sheep-printed woolly sock (I have a few pairs).
"so anyways, I was like thinking, we could like, I dunno, like, have an evil talking potato who's out to get, like, Batman-Bella and then, like, Emmett-The-Vampire-Cat (the thirty-ninth!) comes and saves the day! Ooh, ooh!!! I know," he happily rambled as I sat there, still choking. "THEN, we get Mike Newton to dress up as a dinosaur wearing flippers and a penguin costume and Jasper's red emo thong! AND THEN, Mike-a-Saur the Newt-on-a-Saur (AKA, Mike-a-Saur) comes and starts to kidnap potatoes! AND SHOELACES!" Emmett yelled excitedly and with that, he did that weird thing you see on TV where someone barges straight through a wall and there's a body-shaped hole in it, and ran off somewhere.
Then, I heard a scream downstairs. A very, girlier-than-Alice scream. Uh-oh…
Emmett's POV-
I ran straight through the wall after telling my homie about my awesome plans. I sprinted down the stairs (breaking a few steps and tripping over an old man called Steve who was actually a nine year old girl called Steve) and fell down the rest of the way into Edward's gorgeous arms.
"Oh Edward! You saved meee," I said, fluttering my awesome eyelashes and smacking a wet kiss onto his pursed lips.
Edward dropped me before saying in a British accent, "good lord, old bean! What had gotten into you, chappie?!"
I looked at him for a minute before yelling, "OMC!!!! Edward is secretly British! Come my little chocolate minion, we have to go now!" and then I grabbed him and threw him through the air vent that had magically appeared from thin air!
I ran outside to where Edward had come out and picking him up off the floor bridal style, I said in Edward's British Accent, "onwards we shall trot! Come my little gold penny, we've got to keep the flame ALIVE! DON'T LET THE FIRE DIE, MY LOVE!!!" I had no idea what I was saying, but it sounded good when I ended it in a brilliant Russian accent.
It was then that I had The Idea. I froze, dropped Edward who landed with a HONK! And muttered (in a Scottish accent now), "okay, now I need a purple Viking helmet, a red Speedo and a yellow craylola!" before kipping off to Never, Never Land (Wal-Mart).
Bella's POV-
I went downstairs after getting the perfume bottle out of my throat with the help of Carlisle (and a crowbar, and that plastic bit at the end of a shoelace nobody knows the name of, a carton of milk, a fluffy pillow with cats on it (Seriously, there was a Ginger, a Tabby and a Persian) and of course, the half of a window wiper that had been up my bum0crack/bum-hole/bum-Oley…).
Then, I heard a low HONK! outside and decided to investigate.
Edward was sat there with a red look on his face. I raised my eyebrows at him and give him The Look which comes naturally to every single thing in the world (unless you're a male, in inanimate object or an animal. Woolly socks, dwarfs, unicorns, rainbows and Coco Pops (cereal) can give you the look as well as make you do a dozen press ups).
Edward bravely weed himself in fright (even though he's a vampire) as he looked up at me and suddenly, Snow White's dwarf, Albert (the one that I accidently sat on in the previous chapter) magically appeared from the end of the rainbow and scared Edward so much that he quickly did an orbit of the earth in scared-ness.
I just shook my head as Alice came striding out of the house like all the kings horses and all the kings men. She had a determine expression on her face and suddenly, Edward started whimpering. He looked at me for help.
I shook my head again. I pitied him. "I feel no sympathy for you, my little ginger bread biscuit with beady raisin eyes," I said sternly before watching him being dragged away by the ear by Alice for a costume check.
He was screaming at the top of his lungs and all the woodchucks and deer and centaurs came out of their hiding places to stare.
"Nooooooo! Lucifer's little sister has meeeeeeee!!! Please!! Somebody save meee! Anything but silver nylon!!!!!!!!!!"
Emmett's POV-
A-ha! I had dressed up in my fabulous gear-a bright red Speedo, a shiny, purple Viking helmet and I was armed with a pink laser (batteries not included. Styles may vary) - and I looked un-beatable.
Especially with my gorgeous yellow craylola by my side.
When I finally got to my destination (after getting a lot of man meat eyeing me up), I knocked on the door five times and three-quarters. The door opened.
I put a dazzling smile of my bootilicious face and said brightly to the gobsmacked person stood in the doorway,
"Yo, sup' Mike?!"
AN- so, what do you think?! Do you think I should continue? Change anything? Add something? Anyone wanna be a super hero/villain?!
Just review or PM me and I'll see what I can do!
Please review.
~Jade
