I Screamed For You

You better pray

That there's another way out

You better pray

that someone's listening now

No angels gonna hear your cry for help

Chapter ? ½: cold

A/N

This isn't getting posted on Fanfiction for quite awhile. Lol. It's a work in preogress, so let me know what you think, message me, comment me, something.

The whole plan was working through my head

I didn't know if I could do this to Bella, she wanted to be one of them, and me and Alice shouldn't interfere, no matter what happened we shouldn't stop something Bella wanted, though in the back of my mind I knew she wanted me more 'so I can pretend its you for the rest of eternity' echoed through my mind. That was solid proof there that she wanted me, not him, she always thought of me more than she thought of him. I thought briefly about in the shower, and it sent me aching for my blade, I don't know why that was the one thing I remembered the most, not bellas body, but it was the addiction working through me, I wanted it because I was addicted, and I was addicted because I felt that without it, I had nothing. I figured this whole plan of Alice's plan would just end up back fireing on us. when I had called her to ask her about it she had just said "well were gonna have to try, even if we have to try and die for her, I'm willing to chance it. I would do anything for Bella" at least she loved her. if she did end up as a monster she would have alice. and Alice was a good person.

I shoved my hair out of my face searching for the one thing I knew would clear my head at the moment. As soon as I found it I was dazed. It made my legs weak. It made my hands shake, eyes un focus, it really had a hold of me. I needed it now. I pressed it to the only part of my skin I had left um marred, and slid it across, it went through my skin so easily, it was like cutting through water, it went so easily. the blood dripping to the bed excited me every time I did this it made me feel more than I had ever felt in life. since Bella had left my life and returned to her bloodsucker at least. I pictured her lips pressed to mine softly. I wanted her to be mine. Not his. All she was to him was yet another possession he could call his. He made me sick. I felt the choking sensation coming to the for front of my throat. It seemed to get tighter and tighter on me, just like when I tried to commit suicide. The rope just got tighter and tighter. It felt a lot like this. only when I stopped breathing I had passed out and woke with the vampire working over my body. I had broke my neck, and paralyzed my body, if it wasn't for that doctor, I would have died, but he wouldn't let me. I growled at the thought. in this weaker state of mind I was more human than I had ever been, my sense of hearing was starting to dull down, my scent was starting to die down, all of it was going, I didn't have to work as hard to concentrate on a normal speed. And obviously, I didn't heal as fast. I wondered if I even COULD phase. I looked at the clock. It was 11:30. There was a lot of time before I had to go. I wondered idly if I should try to phase, but I decided against it they would all be waiting to pounce on me. and I didn't know if I could hide my thoughts well enough. I had gotten good at it. But now that I was so used to just thinking everything I wanted I doubted I could do it

I heard billy tossing and turning in his bed down the hall them him finally sitting up and putting his feet on the floor he was gonna come to my room. I knew it. He always checked on me a few times a night. I grabbed a blanket and pulled it over my lower body hiding my arms. Not that he didn't know that I did it. But I still didn't want him to see it. I heard him carefully shuffle to his wheelchair and wheel (what he thought was stealthy) to my room. He creaked the door open

"Your awake." He said surprised

"Yeah, I am."

"You staying home tonight?"

"No… I have… patrol…"

"Ooh. Okay. So you are going back to protecting the tribe?"

"Yeah, with Bella on the verge of being… one of them… she could be violent. And as soon as she's bitten it's a war…"

Billy sighed wheeling into the room

"You have to do this Jacob."\

"I know I do. I have to do what's right for the tribe… I cant just… sit like this. I have to kill her if she does become. Who knows what she will be… she could be something totally different… but who knows. She may be the same person only immortalized. I don't know."

"she will be crazed Jacob, you know that, you have seen the newborns."

"some had their composure."

"In a human feeding life. she doesn't have that life. she will be thirsty, and ran by her instincts."

"I just don't think I can do it. It's a fucked off law."

"You have to son. When are you going on patrol?"

"I'm going at about… 12."

"okay good luck"

"yeah" he wheeled out.

That whole fight wasn't happening. I wouldn't let it. If she did get bit, and she did turn. Which I wouldn't let happen, but if it did. I would keep her safe. I would take her wherever she needed to go. No matter how much of a savage she was. And I would teach her with Alice how to do it correctly. And even if I had to do it alone I would do it. But she would be composed before I left her life forever so I could know that she was in a good place before I left her.

My cell phone rang next to me.

"Hello?"

"Jacob, we need to go now, the times have changed in the vision, hurry. Meet me at the boundry next to the street and we will go. But we need to hurry. Its already started." the line went dead and I jumped up and out the window in the biggest hurry I have ever been in. as soon as I hit the woods I blew up. it was the question I had asked myself many times in the last week, and yes, I could still phase. I was shooting through the woods faster than I had run since I had become this.

Jake. It was Quil

Go home buddy don't you dare tell anyone what I'm doing

I want to help Jacob.

Cant.

I ran faster and I was at the boundry I could smell the sweet scent of Alice that I was starting to grow accustomed to.

You think the leech smells nice?

Go Quil. And don't tell ANYONE. Remember when you ran away and wanted to not be a wolf anymore? I helped you do it. And I kept it a secret too. I don't want to be a wolf anymore. But I have a purpose right now. And if they 'help' it will ruin everything.

I wont tell man. You know that I didn't even tell anyone I saw you that night.

Thank you quil

No prob. If you need help just send me a howl. There was the sparkle of him leaving and I was alone. I caught onto Alice's scent and followed it. I saw her standing motionlessly in the woods

"We need to do this silently." She muttered I nodded my wolf head

"you have to go around the back. Follow the wind to hide your scent. there will be an open window and I will meet you there. Phase. Let me rub off as much of your scent as I can, and we will enter the house, there will be a door to the left, that's Esme and Carlisles room. Hide your thoughts, as much as you can, Edward wont be listening, then meet Jasper in the dining room. Then He will lead you to the top of the stairs. Stay there. And then as soon as I come out with Bella you go in and help Jasper." I nodded and Started walking towards the house following the wind.

My thoughts overwhelmed me. going over the plan a few times before I started to hide all of my thoughts simmering them down to a dull chatter of nothing that would catch his attention

A/N: what do you guys think? like it?

Well you better. lol. Because it has taken me 3 days to write. Lol.