Chapter 46

Cass pulled in to the parking lot of the IHOP. I saw Bennett waiting outside. His hands in his sweatshirt pocket and his breathe visible in front of him. I didn't know what would be more painful for him. Staying out in the cold or seeing me. Cass sighed. "I told you," She said. "You should have told him before."

"I know," I said. "I just didn't think I'd go through with it."

"Get out." Cass said smiling. She was getting too much enjoyment out of this.

I took my time. Undoing my seat belt and looking at her one last time. "Wish me luck." I said. I opened the door slowly. Getting out. My eyes down and I shut the door to my car. I looked up and he was just turning back around seeing me.

Cass drove away when I started walking towards him. He was jsut looking at me. I didn't know what he thoguht at all. He blinked slowly looking at me. When I was close enough. He suddenly smiled. Nothing of what I expected. "Wow," He said quietly. I suddenly wished I hadn't dyed my hair. I wasn't sure how I felt about it. I regretted it. He stpped closer to me. He kissed me. His arms wrapping around me. He jsutl ooked at me. His brown eyes so sweet and soft. "You look beautiful."

I didn't think anyone used that word anymore. This was jsut my hair color changing. I hardly would say I ever looked beautiful. I was just me still. Small, shy, emo-Elisa. But here he was lookign at me in a way I never seen him before. Telling me I was beautiful. I thought you were only beautiful when you were all dressed up and looked the part. I was the same except for my hair.

"Thank you," I said quietly. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you I was planning to do this."

He laugehd a little. "It's okay." He said. He touched my hair. He kissed my forehead and we went inside my hand wrapped up in his. It was stupid for me to dye my hair becuase when I walked in to the restaurant all of the kdis there that had known me stared and Becky was nearly screaming and jumping up out of her seat. But there was no going back.

I felt more self concious in front of these people. There were four other kids here. Kids Bennett didn't really know. They sat on the other end of the tables. Jonah looked at me for about two minutes straight.

"What?" I asked.

He was smilign a little suddnly. His cheeks leaning onto his arms. "Sweet hair." He said. "You remind me of Rainie Joseph now."

Becky looked at me. "Yeah, you look like her." She gasped. "That's so weird. I never noticed this before."

I was shocked and weird being compared to Rainie Joseph. My hair was new. Nothing was different though. Bennett was quiet smiling at me. He pushed my air in between us back behind my shoulder. We hung aroudn at IHOP like before. I felt so self concius though. I crossed my arms a lot. But Bennett was there beside me. I was thankful for him.


We were in his room. We were sitting on the floor. He kept looking at me though. "What?" I asked suddenly. He blinked hard.

"What?"

"You were starign at me again."

"I'm sorry," He said, he meant it.

"Is it that bad?" I asked. I looked down.

He laughed a little. Getting up and sitting next to me. "When did I tell you it looked bad?" He said. He moved his hand around my lower back and leaned me agaisnt him.

"You keep staring at me. And everyone is now." I said. "I didn't think I looked that bad that people stare at me now like I have three heads."

"Have you looked in a mirror?" He asked.

"Yes,"

"And you don't see it?"

"See what?"

He didn't answer. He took my hand and played with it. Running his fingertips along my knuckles. He kissed the top of my head. "I can see how beautiful you are Elisa. I always could. Because you let me. And now everyone has a chance to see how beautiful you are on the inside and on the outside. What people were saying to you were true. But the only reason they said you looekd like Rainie was because you and her are those people that are the type of beautiful that you look alike. But with you you just need to look a little harder."

"Rainie is gorgeous. I could never look liek her." It was true facts.

He paused for a second. His fingers moving tracing the lines in my palms. He kissed the top of my head. "Do you need to go home tonight?" He asked after a few minutes.

I tried to remember. But my mother's schedule had changed. "I don't know." I said. "Maybe."

"It's one-thirty." He said. "Do you want me to wlak you home?"

"Yes," I said.

He stood up. His hand finding mine and pulling me up. His arms wrapped around me in one sweeping movement. He kissed me. And in one moment I was lost in his arms. His hand guiding me outside of the red door. And I walked beside me. Our footsteps even in the quiet world. Our streetlight was on and we both stared at it.

Not saying anything.

My driveway was empty. And my car was in our garage. I didn't want him to go. I looked at him. "Do you want to come in?" I asked quietly.

"Sure," He said. And we went inside.


I woke up the next morning. My legs tangles with his. He was barely awake too. But we both shook ourselves up out of bed. Last night we had hooked up. I sat on the edge of my bed when he gave me my shirt. I pulled it over my head. He did the same. He came back over to me. Leaning down and kissing me. "If we do this more often," He said. "I don't know what I'll feel like when I wake up alone."

I smiled. "Me neither."

"But waking up with you in my arms is the greatest feelign in the entire world." He sat next to me falling back. I looked down touching his face. He jsut stared back at me. His fingers touched my wrists. He kissed me. "You look so different." He said smilign agaisnt my lips. "I love it."

This year was ending tonight. It was so strange. It felt like everything was just beginning.