A/N: So this is part two, and I'm thinking there might be two or three more parts, but I'm not entirely sure yet. Just for future reference, I'm not much for writing sappy/happy endings at the moment, so if that's what you're looking for, I'm not the author you should be chasing. Lol. Anyways, enjoy guys and gals. Tell me what you think.
My Legacy, My Future pt. 2
She grabbed my hand and led me to the center of the hot and sweaty mob. She stood in front of me, with her back up against my chest. As soon as she started to move, I knew this was something that was going to come back and bite me in the ass. She and I were starting to move so deliciously together, and for a while, I couldn't even remember my own name. This was what she did to me in normal situations, but the fact that she and I were practically fucking with clothes on, was making things that much worse. Up until this point, my hands had merely laid on her hips, but what the hell, I might as well enjoy whatever I can get, so my right hand was drawing circles on her stomach. I could tell it was driving her crazy just by the moans that she elicited. After a few minutes, she turned around and faced me, our eyes immediately locking.
"I want you. So bad Ash," she said, and it took everything I had not to groan.
"You know we can't," I replied.
She stopped moving, and so consequently, so did I.
"Why Ashley? Why can't you just believe me? Things can be different now."
I grabbed her hand, and we walked outside. This was a conversation that couldn't take place at a rave. When we finally got outside, I almost immediately regretted coming out here. The mixture of my body sweat, and the late night breeze was make me shiver, and not in a good way.
"Things can't be the way you want with the snap of your fingers Spencer," I finally said.
She was hugging herself, and I wasn't sure if it was because she was cold, or if it was in order to keep her self calm.
"I'm not asking for that. I'm only asking that we try. I know you feel something for me. I see it in your eyes. I saw it every time I kissed Aiden a few years ago. I saw it when I told you that he and I had sex. It all hurt you. Just like I can never lie to you, you can't lie to me. I could always see right through you. That's why you never once had a boyfriend in high school. I mean, I know you were asked plenty of times, because I'd always hear a few of Aiden's friends making bets on who'd fuck you first. Do you know what?"
"What?"
"I was always put into those bets. Even other people saw it Ash!"
I looked down at the ground.
"I'm not good enough Spence."
She walked up to me, and our faces were so very close, I could swear that she wanted to kiss me.
"But you are, for me, you'll always be more than enough. You always protected me. You always looked out for me. You were the only one who understood me. You were my best friend, and all I ever did was hurt you. Ash, I can't tell you how sorry I am. That day we fought almost two years ago, you were right. I wasn't there."
I watched them kiss by her locker, and it wasn't like it had been the first time, but it still hurt. Aiden wasn't an all too bad guy. I mean, for the most part, he was good to Spencer. They had been together for 6 months now, and truth be told, I wasn't sure how much more I could take. I had to go get some air.
I walked outside, and headed to "our" spot. There was a clearing of grass, at the very edge of the school grounds. Not many people went there, and whether it was because no one really knew it was there, or because they merely chose not to go there, I never knew. Either way, I was thankful. I needed to be alone and think.
"Hey. Something told me you'd be here," she said as she sat next to me.
I was sitting with my knees to my chest, a habit that I had learned from her.
"Yeah. I just needed to think."
She laughed, "About what?"
"None of your business."
"Oh, okay. I'm sorry."
I let out a heavy sigh.
"No, I'm sorry. You didn't deserve that. I just—ugh, I don't want to talk about it."
"Okay, then what do you want to talk about?"
"Nothing," replied, staring up at the sky.
"Ash, why are you getting so distant lately?"
"I'm not. You're the one that's always too busy sucking face to make time for her freidns."
She stood up.
"What the fuck, Ash?!"
That's how I could tell she was really upset. She rarely cussed. When the thought crossed my mind, it was a slight turn on, but then I quickly remembered why she had cussed and I felt like someone had just dumped a bucket of cold ice on me.
I stood up and met her actions, putting my hands in my pockets.
"It's true Spence and you know it. Where were you last Friday?"
"With Aiden. I had dinner with him. What does that have to do with anything?"
"Just goes to show how much you know!"
"What does that mean?"
"I needed you! I called you twelve times! Not once, not twice, twelve times! My dad died, and you weren't even there!"
I didn't want to stick around to hear what she had to say, so I left, urging the tears away.
"…That day we fought almost two years ago, you were right. I wasn't there."
"Is that supposed to make me forgive you?"
She looked down at her feet.
"No," she whispered.
"I'm so tired Spence. I'm so tired of living like this. I just want to forget my past, and I feel like I can't of I'm near you. I need to forget Spence. Yes, you're right; I am in love with you. I have been since the first day I met you. But I just can't do this with you. I'm sorry. Who knows, maybe we can at least be friends? But for now, that's all I can offer."
All she could do was nod her head, as tears fell down her face.
I cupped both sides of her face, and kissed her forehead, whispering "I forgive you blue eyes."
You aren't exactly sure how you'll feel about all of this tomorrow, but part of you really doesn't care. You know that you aren't what Spencer needs at the moment, and that she's not what you need at the moment either. Both of you know that you have to grow first. You know that you have to at least be friends first. You have to start over, because more than anything, you want to do things right this time around, or at lest try to. Because deep down inside, you know you'd rather have her as your friend, than her nothing at all.
A/N: Next part in Spencer's POV? What do you guys think?
