Chapter 50

It was snowing. Halfway to February and it was snowing hard. I had been looking out the window, but he finally settled down pulling me against him. I head rested agaisnt his chest. He had put on this movie. "This is another cheesy one." He warned me.

"I like cheesy ones." I said.

"Me too," He said in a goofy voice. I laughed a little, he kisses my forehead and we started watching. The movie starting. We watch movies a lot. When we are bored or just sitting in his living room or mine he'll find one. He's seen so many. And as expected as it is to me, he loves cheesy love movies. But I don't know if anyone else would think that. If someone drops really sweet e. e. cumming poems in your locker I think you'd guess they are a romanticist of sorts.

I told him about my mother. I told him everytihng. He was the first person I told. Cass was right after but somehow Bennett was the first person I wanted to talk about it with. He wants to meet my mother. Making his visits to my house during the day more frequent. When my mother isn't home at night he'll always end up here though. It'll be the fourth time this weekend he'll have stayed overnight with me. We don't do anything really. We usually talk ourselves to sleep. I care about him a lot. But he never tries to go further than hooking up or below the waist. And I'm fine with that. I don't know if I want to sleep with him anyway.

We've been hanging around with Rainie and Paul a lot. When he's working I'll show up and Rainie will to when Bennett and Paul are working the same shift. We'll go to the food court and sit and talk. Bennett and PAul are becomign really good friends. We hung out with them at this show we went to a few towns over. But I think when they look at the four of us they mix it up a little. When people look at us quickly, they probably think Rainei and Bennett are the ones who are in love.

As impossible that's what they probably think.

But once you look at Paul and Rainie together, I don't think you could ever rethink who out of us are in love. You can tell they love each other from across the room. Strangers must be able to tell too. And something tells me that Bennett envies them of that the same way I do.

There are moments though, when Bennett and I will just be together alone, when I feel like anything can happen. It could happen when we're watching cheesy movie, or when he's asleep beside me. I never know when but I just look at him and my heart starts singing and I just feel like I could do anything. I believe in everything. And that's one of the greatest feelings I've ever felt.

In school, girls hate me still. I don't think it helped when I told Dave I had cheated on him too. When people look at me now they probably only see that person. Thinking how could I do that to Dave Mandeville. One of the most popular kids in school. I cheated on him. With who? That was an easy guess for everyone. When I'm with Bennett people stop staring at me alone. They stare at both of us. Which I don't even notice. Because when I'm with him it's all that matters.

There are parts of your past you can never let go of. Whenever I see Dave, he just looks at me. What Ifs written thick across his forehead as they run through his mind. But I'm happy I stood up to him finally. Cutting off a loose end left hanging there too long. If he never speaks to me again, it would be something I expected.


The credits started rolling. I started to get off of him, but he sat up with me. Pressing his lips agaisnt mine. And moving his hands to my neck. I smile against his lips. And he moves back a little. His hands moving to hold my face. "One month and a half." He said.

"No," I said smiling. "Two."

"Ah, but those two weeks when we were a secret don't count I don't think."

I smile kissing him. He kisses me back. The music to the movie credits are annoying. But somehow they don't play as loud. He smiles, his forehead leaned agaisnt mine. He kisses the corner of my mouth. "Fine two months." He said.

I start kissing him again. I could have kissed him for forever, but I heard my mother's car pull into the driveway. Ice cracking underneath her tires. I pull back, my eyes widening. "Shit," I said.

"It's your mom, huh?" He asks. I get off of him. Moving so we were sitting far apart. My mother's car door slams. And before I know it, Bennett has pushed the blanket we had been using where he once sat and is moving next to me. His arm around me. Changing the channel.

"Yep,"

My mother opens the front door. Hearing the TV. Something she probably hasn't heard since Amber visited. But Amber's at school. Making the living room the first stop on her route to her office. I think my mother expected a short, dorky kid with blonde spikey hair and a football t-shirt. Even though Bennett is a fan of football I don't think I'd ever find him in his football jersey for the Chicago Bears in public.

"Hello," My mother said. Sounding fake, and hollow to me.

I stand up quietly, Bennett standing too. I watch him as he politely tries to ignore my mother's face. She wasn't supposed to be home yet. She must have come home early or something. But after a few seconds of shock leaving her eyes, she shakes Bennett's hand and they meet without me saying much of a word. I jsut anticipate my mother's questions later about why Bennett's jeans look girlier than mine and why he's so tall and different from Dave. Why he dresses so funny.

"It was nice to meet you." My mother says quickly. The awkwardness in the room is overwhelming to me.

"Nice meeting you too." He says back.

My mtoher walks out of the room waving. Sometimes I understand why kids hate their parents right after they do something awkward or unneccessary. I'm saying I never wanted her to meet Bennett. It's just I didn't want it to be now. It's too soon. I have met his mother. But mine if nothing like his. We sit back down.

"I'm sorry about that." I say quietly to him.

He kisses my forehead. "It's okay." He puts and arm around me. "It was fine."

The way he said that made me believe him. I smiled a little at him kissing him. Dave had loved my mother because my mother had loved him back. Bennett doesn't even seem to care that my mother will msot likely question the tighness of his jeans. He jsut turned back ot the television, and we watched a little bit more before he left. Promising to call me at eight. Even tohugh it was a school night, I had a feelign we wouldn't get of the phone until midnight or later.

Shutting the door behind him, I listened to my mothers's fingers hitting her computer keyboard at great speed. The sound showing no signs of her stopping soon. She wasn't going to come to me and comment on my choice of a boyfriend. She let it go. A good sign Amber will tell me in an e-mail after I told her. And right at that moment, it was a relief.


A/N: My Jack's Mannequin obsession lately may/may not result in a few chapter added to "Leaving Through the Window" but my Death Cab For Cutie one is definatly helping me with this. Things will be getting interesting soon I promise. Predictions to what's coming up. Hint: it has to do with a band.

PS. 50 Chapters and 10,000 words more than "Perfect Kisses" Must I say it? Oooof.