You thought wrong

decode- paramore

RPOV

I flipped my hood up to find Jacob stairing back at me.. With the most pained expression known to man. I have caused that expression one two many times.. and I cant take that anymore.. I know, Im going out of my mind; I ran away from this place expecting a new life and smoothe sailing.. Why hell no! It wont happen that way for Renesme Cullen..

Jacob has haunted me for the past months... I cant take it.. He is my heroin; and I hate to admit it... Every memory that I have includes him.. and I want it to stay that way. But it cant; Im in too deep with the volturi... I want things to go back to normal...

In these past monts I have thrown away everything that my family has tought me to be, everything that I was expected to be...I have killed... taken innocent lives. Massacared many of my own kind. I have indured the most excruciating pains.. and grew to think of the pain as pleasure, Im no longer good...

Even jacob wouldnt take me back for the things that I have done...

Flashback...

Volturi

Clauis speaking

"Would you be strong enough? Or would you trembel in the face of danger? So, whats your answer Renesme? If I train you there is no turning back. You will be the head of the Volturi guard. You are stronger than Felix,Emmet, and myself put together; and with your newly gained power you have an advantage over any vampire we come across. Renesme, you can show and take memories from people, and you can also shapeshift. We went centuries thinking that a vampire couldnt posess more than one power, but you have proven us wrong; as you have done many times before."

"You will transform into a masicistic wariour before your enimies eyes, you will become every beings worst nightmare. You are the strongest vampire to ever exist, in a few years I expect you to become an elder, to join Aro myself and Clauis.

We will no longer be the triplets of death...with you joining us become the four stages of death."-marcus implied

"So will you join us, and soon complete the four stages of death?" Aro asked...the answer that I was about to give would change my life forever...

Reality...

This is why I came back.. I need jacob... and I cant come to regret the decisions that Im about to make... I want

"Renesme, What have you done?:" jacob asked, it looked as if he was about to cry... or attack me.. Iwish he would, I deserve to die.

"Ja..Jacob... Forgive me"... I leaped into his arms... I never want him to let go...

"You've came back to me?"

I projected him my true thoughts

' I wish I could; but Im in too deep, I cant get out of this one jakey'

"I can get you out!" he dropped me and went straight for alec...

"NO!" -- "Alec dont! He dosent mean it!" I grabbed ahold of jacobs hand...

"Jake no... I want this, I cant and wont take back the things that I've done. I made the choice..."

Jacob turned to face me

"I cant go through this again.. I cant watch you turn away. Away from me, Im begging you... Please dont do this.. for me"

I knew what he was talking about, he was worrying about my near depart.. he knows its comming...

"Lets just make the best of - this visit." I said.. trying to confort him.

"I knew this would happen!!" Alec said with a grimice plasterd on his face.

" I knew once you saw this... mutt, you would go crawling back to him.. Well, its not going to happen You are not going to throw away all of our work!" Alec yelped

"Did you hear me say that I wanted to stay?" I told alec,

"No, but your expressions tell all... your not hard to read"... alec stated,

"IM here to celebrate Jacobs birth day... you are free to go on home.." i said simply.. still holding jakes hand, I had forgotten how much I missed his warmth.

"Our plane leaves in half and hour. We should leave now." Jane said.

"Renesme, pl-please dont leave me. I cant live without you, Im begging you...Dont" Jacob was so distraut.. and I didnt know what to do..

"I cant stay, I have to go back to italy"..I said aloud

I projected him

' I will be back, I promiss.. I hate this, we will be.. I cant do this without you...I will be back, I promiss.. soon.'

"Your soon is my forever..." jacob whispered.

"goodbye jacob, happy birthday.." I gave him a kiss on the cheek before I was pryed out of his arms... by alec.

Later at the airport...

" Alec.. I need a breather.. away from all of this.. you are somothering me, I have to go. I have to go back to my family." I knew he wouldnt like it but.. well I honestly dont care...

" I knew it, your going back to the mutt!" he spat

" NO.. back to my family.. I wont have any clouded judgements.. I just need to see them... to see carlisle.. everyone." I begged "if you keep forcing us apart your going to loose me.." gotcha

" Promiss me no mutt.. and I will Know if you telll me different.. Aro.." I interupted him

" I know, I know. One touch of aro... all will be told.. I will be a good girl" I told him

" No, you will be MY bad girl..." he winked

"Fine!" I gave him a goodbye kiss and ran to the truck.. my truck... black on black ford f350.// {PICS ON WEBSITE}

"lapush here we come!!"


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JPOV

"See there you go again telling me what I can't do" she yelled and smacked me in the chest "I'll do whatever I fucking well want to do, and there is nothing you can do about it!" and she went to shove me again but I grabbed her wrists and she yelped in pain "Jacob you're hurting me" she whimpered.

"I told you not to do that" I warned and grasped her wrists tighter, I could feel myself losing it and I couldn't stop myself.

"You're hurting me, let me go" she begged and started to cry "Jacob, I'm sorry just let me go"

I leaned down and whispered in her ear "See you're nothing but a little girl" and dropped her wrists and she started rubbing them and looked up at me with tears in her eyes.