April.

Chapter 69

It was the first few days of April. And after a few days of stress it had finally happened. We were sitting all in a big room full of scary punk-rockers and goth and hair-metal kids. I sat next to Bennett who leaned agaisnt a desk. His fingers tracing and going over my hand. As evveryone just stood there. Their first show. The drive to Natick had been a little boring. My mother wanted me home before eleven and so I drove alone and Bennett drove in Jonah's van with everyone except for Rainie and Paul because there was only enough room for one person.

I needed to go home early.

Amber was home for this weekend but I had missed her coming home. She had been e-mailing me telling me everything has gone great with Tyler and how she thinks he's really different. I think that means something good. Cass and miles was somewhere else. Maybe seeing a movie. And I sat doing not much of anything but we waited for their one song. Even though Bennett said a thousand times the competition was stupid and they just wanted to play a show. I wanted to be there. I was looking forward to it. I didn't want to go home early. I wanted to stay with him.

My mother was suspicious about everything I said or did. I din't care anymore. I just needed ot be with Bennett. It wasn't a want becuase I knew in the end the mroe I wanted to be with him it'd hurt me more in the end. But I needed to see him. Be with him. It was something like breathing. I needed to do it. I needed to be near him. And he seemed to feel the same way.

They came up with a name. It was narrowed down to two. Cellar Door from the movie Donnie Darko which was Jonah's favorite movie. He was Frank the Bunny for Halloween for the past three years. And then there was Red Letter Day. Which was what they chose indefinatly for the time beign after the Get Up Kids song off of Something to Write Home About. I liked it a lot.

Jonah checked his watch religiously. Anxiously. His leg jiggling like I never noticed it did all the time. He looked around at this punk rocker. Eyeing Rainie. Sometihng she was unaware of. As well as Paul. Who was just discussing sometihng with Mike. Rainie jumping in here and there.

Jonah started checking his watch more frequently. The noise level was so loud and the ceiling was shaking because the crowd was up above us. I was afraid it would collapse on us. Bennett and I kept shooting nervous glances upwards. And in a few minutes. "We got to go up now." Jonah announced.

Everyone nodded. Bennett kissed my forehead. His lips agaisnt my skin. He brush hair out of my eyes. "Wish me luck." He said.

I smiled. "You don't need it." I kissed him. Pressing my lips against his.

They left Rainie and I alone. We went up in the direction of the general admission floor. I looked around. Seeing four differnt guys staring at us. I think they were more starign at Rainei than me. I went up the stairs following her. To the loud dark room. We stood in the back near the quiet insecure kids who went for the music than the expirience of this.

She got up on her tip-toes. "I can see Paul." She said loudly to me.

I looked up seeing PAul underneath the lights tuning his guitar. And then Jonah came out- Mike suddenly appearing behind his drumset. And then Alex. Bennett came out last. He came out. Nobody really cheers right after people walked out except for a few drunk people in the middle.

Bennett pushed hair out of his eyes looking around. He couldn't see me. His eyes darting around for me. "Hey, we're Red Letter Day," He said. There were some cheers. The crowd going silent waiting.

I crossed my arms, feeling a draft coming down. They were only chills I think. In my head. But he looked at Mike. I watched Bennett carefully. Mike started playing. The drumbeat coming out. The easy part. Then Paul jumped in. Jonah shortly after. Palyign a rift Paul came up with yesterday at practice. He played it smoothly. Thank god. Jonah wasn't gettign it just right yesterday. Alex played something I couldnt even hear. The past few singers could barely be heard because of the sound equipment.

But simotaniously- everyone stopped playign expect for Paul. And occasioanlly Jonah. I watched him carefully. He gave up searching for me. Clsoed his eyes. Leaned int othe microphone. There was a tense second. He started singing. Singing to me in a room too crowded to find me. And he was amazing.

You could hear his voice rise above everything. And the crowd was great to them. They were better than anyone I'd ever seen I swear. A new band at least. I smiled a little. Rainie looking at me her eyes wide. The song was four minutes. It was my song. The one he played in the Variety Show. It was the same song. The same skeleton and he never meant it more than tonight. It was how he sang.

I forgot aobut June or the end of the summer.


It was impossible finding them but for me to get home in time I had to leave right then. When I saw him I jsut went up and kissed him. He was a little sweaty and he didn't hesitate. He kissed me back pulling me tight into his arms. He kissed me. And we were the only two people in the world.

We moved away he smiled. "Elisa-"

"Hey, Elisa," It was Jonah. "You leaving now right?"

Bennett looked at him in this blank way. I looked back ot Jonah. "Yes," I said.

"Do you mind giving me a ride?" He asked. His cell phone in his hand. "I live really close to you guys."

I smiled politely. "Sure," I didn't mind at all. Bennett let go of me. Still standing close to me. Jonah smiled thankign me saying he just needed to grab his stuff they'd take his guitar and stuff in the van. I looekd back at Bennett. He was watching Jonah walking away. "You guys were amazing." I said enthustically.

"Really?" He said his msiled gone. He looked insecure. "We sounded off to me."

"You were so good." I said smiling.

"I couldn't find you." he said. "Where were you and Rainie?"

"In the back," I said. "If you don't win I'll be completely shocked."

He smield sweetly at me. Kissing my forehead again. "Thank you," He said. "Are you sure you have to go?"

I nodded. "Yeah," I said. "But call me tonight?"

"I promise." He said. I leaned up and kissed him. Closing my eyes and kissing him.

Jonah shouted to me. "Come on, you can be all over each other tomorrow. I need to go Elisa. I got places to go and people to see."

"When are you going to stop using those fucking awful quotes?" Paul asked. "You're overdoing it."

Jonah just grinend at him. And then waved for me to come on. I kissed Benentt once, pulling away with his lips still waiting for more of a goodbye. "Bye," I said quickly. "Goodnight." He said. Forcing a quick smile. Jonah grabbed my arm dragging me away. But Bennett smiled- and I looked back at him until I fear Jona hwas leading me into something dangerous that would result in a 'Guys... you won't believe what happened to me and Elisa...' tomorrow or the next day.


"You only have one Saves the Day CD in here?" He asked sharply. "What has he got you listenign to now? I thought you were cool Elisa. You have offended music." Riding with Jonah alone was like riding with a movie cartoon character. You couldn't do anything but smile and agree with him and laugh it off. He was too cartoon-ish to be annoying.

He put on another CD. Then he went back ot my little car collection. "So, you and Ol' Ben are gettin' serieux, huh?" I looked at him. He took this as a need for translation. "Serieux if French for serious."

"I take French," I said. "And I don't know."

"That's what they all say, baby." He sang turning back to his search for his own approved music. "So, should I wait for Rainie to dump Paul or you to dump Ol' Benny?"

I laugehd a little. "Why would you wait for either?" I asked.

He rolled his eyes for dramatic effect. "Duh... I mean I'm single, I want to know who I'm waiting for."

I shrugged.

"Hah! So you and Bennett are getting serieux!" He said pointign at me quickly. "Oo-ooh. Elisa, why didn't you tell me?"

"Tell you what?" I asked looking at him.

He settled down a little. "Just kidding," He said. He flipped thorugh another few CDs. He has gone over them again and again. "He doesn't talk a lot to Sean about these things, or even me- but I have an unbelievable sense of hearing and heard him and Paul talking. I'm not telling you what he said... but let's jsut say you and Bennett are a more functional Kerrington fairy-tale." I looekd at him. My ears and reaction dripping with disbelief. "Okay-" He said if I was forcing him at gunpoint. "-so I'll summarize- you've metaphorically gotten the Brad Pitt of Kerrington wrapped around your finger."

"Really?" I said. "The Brad Pitt huh?" I turned onto a street passing a 'Welcome to Kerrington: Home of the 1996 Little League World Series Champions Team: The Bears.' The Bears lost thier first games easily. But it's all Kerrington is nationally known for.

"Yup," He said. He flickered his eyebrows up and down. "So what do you think: should I wait for you or Rainie?"

"Neither," I said. "I'd never date you."

He clasped his chest. "That hurt Elisa." He looked back to my CDs. "Rainie it is!"

I laugehd lightly again. Turning again.

"So how were we tonight?" He asked. "Explosive right?"

"Exactly." I said. "Explosive."

He smiled to himself. Putting on another CD. "I have to say- I like you a lot better than his last girlfriend." He said. "What a whore... her name was Christine- God, she's fucked his life up so much. Told her to stay out of his life then the whole Rainie thing-" He looked at me. "You know about the Rainie thing right?"

I nodded. "Yeah,"

"Yeah," He sighed. "You got some cool points under your belt little Miss Elisa." He looked up. "Take this left."

"I'm glad I have some cool points." I said following his directions.

"It's a good thing," He said. "I live on Barnestable Street," He pointed. "Right here. Number 34."

I stopped out front. "See you," I said.

"Well, thank you Eh-lisa." He put my CDs back. "I owe you a ride somewhere. Hopefully next time you will have improved your selection on CDs. Or if I give you a ride I shall educate you. Enlighten you perhaps. But see yah'"

"Bye Jonah," I said laughing a little.

He opend the door swinging his legs out and jumping out. I watched him walk up ot his front door, he had a bouncey step and I pulled away. Going home and sitting in my room. To get a phone call at one in the morning telling me they had won the whole battle of the band. I was happy for him. And told him about my interesting ride home with Jonah.

I try not to hate my mother so much, but I wish I had been there.