Chapter 4

Next day Roderich knocked on Feliciano's door while the others stood by one of the windows waiting to listening on the conversation.

-"Who is it?" Feliciano asks through the door.

-"Eh… It's me Roderich" he says a bit surprised.

The door opens and Feliciano waved to him to come in. Roderich walks in and looks around. He already knew that it was a mess in his house but as soon as he walked in he understood that this actually was clean. It was a personal mess with stuff where it should be and so on.

-"Why did you come here?" Feliciano asks and sits down on his sofa. He tried to look as happy as he used to but it was obvious he didn't feel that way. His eyes showed him hours without sleep and his skin was pale.

-"I know you haven't felt that good in a while…" Roderich starts to say unsure, "and I wondered if it has something to do with that boy who we lived together with for a long time ago…"

As soon as he mentioned the boy Feliciano looked even sadder and sighed.

-"Well it is…" Feliciano says but then looks up on Roderich, "but in the same way it isn't"

-"What do you mean?"

-"It's just that…" it looks like Feliciano tries to say something but then sighs, "nothing"

Roderich was surprised over Feliciano being so sad but then remembered that Ludwig actually also was as sad. If I tell him he might understand and go to talk to him.

-"You know Ludwig is very worried about you" Roderich says and laughs unsure.

-"What?" Feliciano suddenly says and looks at Roderich, surprised.

-"Yeah… he's been a shut-in for as long as you have" he says now even more unsure.

-"Stop lying, he doesn't care about me!" Feliciano says angrily and looks down.

-"What are you saying?" Roderich asks surprised, "he cares about you very much! Kiku told me he actually called him almost screaming because he thought you didn't like him anymore"

Feliciano stood up and walked to Roderich so they stood face to face. What is it with this behavior? I have known him since he was so tiny and I've never seen him behave like this!

-"Stop lying I said" he said to his face and Roderich could see the tears in his eyes.

Then he understood, understood everything.

-"You see him in Ludwig don't you?" Roderich asks and step back to make a distance between them.

It almost looked like the words Roderich said hit Feliciano right in the face and he fell down right on the floor.

-"They both were screaming at me" he started to explain with a happy voice which cracks in the end of every sentence, "they both looked after me, they both were blond and they both have these… blue eyes… I really like those blue eyes, have you noticed that Ludwig and that boy are exactly 8 cm taller than me? Both of them! They can't be the same person right? Ludwig always comes to tie my shoelaces and agrees with everything I come up with! Or maybe not everything but… Does he hate me? Am I a pain to him? Why is he always angry…? What shall I do?"

From after he said but he started to cry and when he couldn't say anything more he covered his face with his hands.

-"But why don't you go to him?" Roderich says and tried to hold a serious face even though he truly felt for this young Italian boy.

-"I can't… because I have those feelings and I can't really hide them" Feliciano says and starts to cry even more, "and I don't want to bother him because he doesn't feel the same"

When Roderich was out of the house everyone came running to him looking at him with shocked eyes.

-"We… next thing we need to do is go to Ludwig's house and hear what he thinks" Roderich says and starts to walk. Without any conversation the LFPS group went to Ludwig. On the way everyone had the same thought:

Poor Feliciano there's no way a cold hearted person like Ludwig ever could feel the same…