TAMMY.
My eyes are glued to the screen.
I can't help it, it's my brother's first night in the arena.
It's way past the time I'd normally rest, and my boyfriend Sebastien is upstairs sleeping in the same room as my parents — we're staying with them during the Games, we all need support really — but I just want to see how Finnegan is.
I honestly can't tell you how much I've prayed over the past week, ever since he got reaped, and I'm by no means a religious person.
He's lying in that camp of his now. He's in the Career pack, as I expected, so he should do fine. Just fine.
The only thing I could ever worry about would be his allies turning on him.
I know it's very possible that could happen, judging by the look that girl Ruby constantly has on her face. Her and her district partner, Jacob, is it, look extremely untrustworthy. I'd trust them about as far as I could throw them.
But Finn should stick it out with them for a while at least, until it gets dangerous.
He's now talking to his district partner now, Absidee Odair. She's being mentored by her own cousin, if I remember correctly.
She could win quite easily, even not being in an alliance with the Careers.
She has the Finnick Odair as a mentor, for Panem's sakes.
But no.
She seems extremely willing to protect my brother in the arena. Maybe even go as far to risk her life for him.
The reason behind that? I'm not quite sure myself.
But I've seen her searching for him after the initial bloodbath was over. She looked visibly relieved when she found him, in fact.
And, of course, I saw her insist to be able to keep watch, when really she spent the majority of her time just gazing at Finn.
Was there something between them?
I'd be surprised.
Finn never mentioned being interested in any girls when he was home, or having any interest at all in even having a girlfriend.
He just didn't.
He was the boy who wove nets and had that weird obsession with sitting on the roof and watching the sun set.
He just didn't find anything much else than that interesting.
I break out of my thoughts to watch the screen again.
We are able to afford a television device, although a bad one, through the amount of extra money we make.
We're quite well off, luckily for us.
And here I am, sat watching the non compulsory Hunger Games viewing.
Here I am, watching my little brother cosy up to a girl in the middle of a death trap.
No, Finn, what are you doing?
Then what he does next is one of the stupidest things I've ever seen him do.
Sadly yes, even stupider than that time when he was younger, a lot younger, that he decided to climb up on the roof for the first time. By himself.
He fell and cried for an hour.
He was a kid, but I still liked to rub that in his face when I saw him. Seb joined in taunting him too sometimes, all good naturedly, though.
We all love each other really.
Well. We used to tease him.
Not anymore.
Even if he does come back, he likely won't be the same, both physically and mentally, will he?
Take Haymitch Abernathy of District 12 as an example.
I doubt he'd ever turned to binge drinking if he hadn't entered the Games.
He could've had a life.
Scary thought, isn't it?
It'll all be okay, is what they told us back in the days of when we were young and naïve.
It was a common way of consoling people; telling them everything would be okay.
But really, was it ever?
I fall forward onto my knees and begin to pray again.
Well, President Snow, look what you've done.
You've got a non religious girl praying.
You've cracked me.