"What were you thinking, Dex?"

"What were *you* thinking? You were putting yourself in danger out there!"

"I was fuckin' fine until you went there and punched him in the face! You seemed like a maniac! Thank fuck I already had what I needed to arrest him, or I would've had to kick your ass into the sun!"

Deb was right. I had lost my temper: a rather undignified move, very unlike myself; but I just couldn't bear to watch as she went there alone with a drug dealer in a pair of shorts and a translucent shirt. It was truly her sex suit 2.0. and, as a male, I had to admit it was a very successful one, which was exactly what had me so worried. That's why I had decided to get out of the car and see what what going on, and I didn't like what I saw.

"He was coming onto you! I exclaimed. "He was being... Disrespectful."

"No, he wasn't... yet... besides, I spent many years undercover as a hooker. I know how to defend myself. I don't need you to baby me just because of... You know, what happened", she said.

"I know that. But you're Lieutenant Morgan now, you don't need to throw yourself at danger like this. This isn't funny at all."

"Yes I do! I need to do this! I need to catch the bad guys, I need to keep myself busy so I don't go fucking crazy thinking about LaGuerta and how fucked up I am. Why are you looking me like that? Why are you looking at me so weird lately?"

"I didn't know you could do it"

"Do what?" She asked.

"Put the mask on"

"Are you high? What mask?"

"The normalcy mask. When we were at the crime scene, you had it on perfectly, and you've done it ever since. Sometimes I look at you and you seem... Different. More like..."

"Like you."

"No, not like me! Behind your mask there's a human, a conscience. LaGuerta was right: you're a good person, and she would've thrown you under the bus no matter what. You're not a killer."

"But I am, Dex", she said, a couple of tears streaming down her face. "I killed an innocent person, there's no turning back now"

And she was right again, as much as I hated it.

"Precisely," I answered. "There's no turning back. We're bound. We're in this together now, whether we like it or not. That's why I have to keep an eye on you."

She looked at me with an unreadable expression on her face, but she didn't say anything more. We drove to her house in complete silence. I knew she knew exactly what I meant: leaving each other behind was not an option anymore, the fate of one was tied to the fate of the other, and whenever one would go, the other would have to go too.

-ooo-

I didn't always try to protect my dear sister against my life and my truth. There was a time when I was young and foolish, and thought I was invincible. Harry gave me a rough wake-up call back then.

It was a sunny Sunday. I was 15 years old, Deb was 13, and my parents weren't home. We found it easy to go to the marina and ride the Slice of life. Harry had taught me how, and I taught Deb that day. She wanted to feel free, to feel like she could escape her responsibilities, the household where she was largely ignored, and the school where the girls taunted her for being a tomboy: She didn't want to suffer anymore. I wanted to escape the Code, I wanted to feel something, to be myself at last.

I looked at her: she looked beautiful with her hair dancing against the salty wind; peaceful and, more importantly, completely trusting of her big brother. An urge had been rising within me for some time. She turned and smiled to me, proud of what she was able to do. Everything was going according to plan, she was practically in my hands. After all, we were in alone in the middle of the ocean: sure nobody would find out, at least not until it was too late.

I was wrong. The coast guard came to our rescue, along with Harry, who looked pale like a ghost.

"Thank God you're okay! I thought something had happened to you guys!" Harry said, wrapping both of us in a hug. "Don't do this to me again. I'll take you for a ride more often, okay?"

We were escorted back to the marina, and then Dad drove us back home in complete silence. Dad sent Deb to greet Mom, while he and I had a chat "man to man", as he said. She pouted in protest, but obeyed reluctantly. Once we were alone, he turned to me, and his face turned from pale to a very angry shade of red.

"What were you gonna do out there?" He asked.

"We wanted to go for a ride on the boat"

"And eat steaks and sodas, Deb already told me that. You know what I mean. What were you gonna do to your sister, Dexter? Don't you dare lie to me"

"I would never hurt her, I swear", I said sincerely. He took me by the arms and stared at me, like his eyes wanted to pierce through a non-existent soul. He spoke very slowly, to make sure I understood each and every word that came out of his mouth.

"You were alone with Debra in the middle of nowhere, on a boat, with a set of knives. Dexter, don't tell me you didn't have plans."

I noticed then that the floor was very interesting. "I had plans," I confessed. "But not that kind, I swear."

"What did you wanna do, then?"

"I wanted to tell her the truth and run away to Puerto Rico on the boat."

"Are you insane? You're children! You can't just run away from home! Besides, with what money? What were you gonna do once you were there? Did you think of your poor mother and me, worrying to death about you two? Did you think of your sister, what she would do if you told her who you are? She would hate you! She's not a killer! You didn't think this through, did you?"

The truth is, I had. I had a few years' worth of savings, and fake for me and my sister; but I knew telling that to Harry would've only made him angrier, so I chose not to.

"She would understand! She wants to catch bad guys..." I replied. Suddenly, an idea sprang into my mind. "You could teach her the Code, like you're teaching me! We could train together and learn how to shoot and be partners..."

"... In crime? Dexter, I'm gonna say this once, and I want you to remember it for the rest of your life: as long as I'm alive, I will never let that happen, and neither should you once I'm not here. Understand?"

"But... Why?"

"I'll show you soon."

The next day, he carried me to the execution of a serial killer, and that's where I met Old Sparky. I never thought about turning Deb into a killer ever again.

Well, seems I screwed that up big time.