I am free from school for an entire month. Hot damn, yes. I may actually have time to write now. As always, thanks to those of you who reviewed.
Had anyone told Ghetsis he would soon be alone, he would soon inherit an entire castle full of servants and riches, that he would have more money than anyone knew what to do with, that his parents were dead and he owned everything, he would have rolled his eyes. As far as he knew, he had all of that already. He had the money, the power, the privilege. Everything anyone ever wanted, he had. His entire life was spent living in this castle, bossing around people who hated him, studying for school so that his grades remained perfect, and getting what he wanted.
He was 25 when he was returning home from school. He had decided to go to college and master something useful, something like being a doctor. Definitely not a stupid pokemon trainer. He wanted nothing to do with the filthy things. Being a doctor would give him an excuse to cut into people too. He was never interested in medicines, or healing the sick, or any of that. It was just something he could spend his time on, something to waste money with.
He had finally finished medical school, he was finally done with everything, until he arrived home that day not going into his room like he had planned, or locking himself away from everyone where he could be alone, but instead he was tugged along by a maid who was telling him his parents were killed while returning from a trip.
The maid then proceeded to tell him about the responsibilities he had to shoulder now, all the money he had inherited, how the entire castle was his to do with as he pleased, but Ghetsis had tuned her out.
His mother and father were gone. Gone. There was something about that word that made him reel inwardly. Growing up, all he had remembered was demanding things from them and getting those things, no matter what it was. Whatever he wanted, he screamed and ranted until he got it. Ghetsis had never really spent time with his parents. He was never read bedtime stories as a child by his mother, he never played baseball with his father, he never really interacted with them unless he wanted something.
The news that they were dead only made him say, "Oh" before he finally began to understand what the maid was telling him. His parents were rich, which made him rich. Now that they were gone, he had entire free reign over their money, to do anything that he wanted with. The castle was his, the servants, the maids, everything was his now.
He stood from the chair he'd been seated in, marveling at everything that was his now, smiling because he was now god in this place, he could do whatever he wanted. And what he wanted was to make everything perfect.
It did not take the castle long to realize life would be very different with Ghetsis in charge. They still hated him and he still knew everyone hated him, but he didn't care. As long as he remained in control of everything, and as long as this place was perfect to him, he didn't care what anyone thought of him.
It was only a few short months later that Ghetsis realized what exactly he'd gotten himself into. Managing the castle was stressing him out, barking orders over every little thing and making decisions was driving him over the edge. It wouldn't be long before he had a nervous breakdown, and he couldn't take it anymore.
He needed to get out.
While things had calmed down for the most part, Ghetsis decided to get out for awhile, so he could breathe and relax a little. Setting his sights on Nimbasa, he decided to catch up with a friend he'd met during school, an older man named Zinzolin. They weren't best buddies, but he envied Zinzolin's goals and outlook on life. All he wanted was to know everything he could about everything. A bit of a philosopher, they had interesting conversations and enjoyed each other's company for the most part.
Nimbasa was always swarming with people, which Ghetsis didn't care for. He hated the crowds. And that's probably why he and Zinzolin got along. They both felt the same about the world, they both hated people by default, they both felt the world's view of perfection was flawed. Despite the crowds, the groups of people complaining about everything, the children yelling and screaming at their parents and the parents ignoring them, Ghetsis didn't mind the rides so much. Like any other person, going to an amusement park was supposed to be...fun. Perhaps it was the childish part of him wanting to get on the roller coasters and the ferris wheel to try and enjoy himself.
He tried not to think about it.
Once he spotted his friend, Ghetsis noticed immediately Zinzolin had another boy with him. A younger boy, which was strange, because the kid looked like he was only in high school. Why would Zinzolin want to hang around with some punk? And what a tacky hairstyle he had. Ghetsis couldn't wrap his mind around how the kid thought dying his bangs blue and styling them around his head was a good idea.
"Hey, Ghetsis," Zinzolin said when Ghetsis walked up. He clapped the younger boy on his shoulder which almost caused him to toppled over backward. Ghetsis wanted to punch his face in already. What a weakling. "This is Colress. I met him a few weeks ago in school."
Ghetsis didn't introduce himself, or extend his hand to shake. He just looked down on the shorter boy who smiled up at him through his glasses. "Shouldn't you be in high school getting your head shoved in a toilet?" Suddenly smiling, Ghetsis laughed to himself. "Oh, I see that's already happened to you, why else would your hair look like that."
Zinzolin shot a glare his way, but Ghetsis continued laughing to himself. Straightening his posture, Zinzolin just rolled his eyes and continued speaking. "Anyway, Colress, this is my friend Ghetsis. We've known each other for awhile. His parents just passed away a few months ago."
Colress's face never changed expression. From the time he was introduced, until the time Ghetsis insulted him, he never stopped smiling. Even with the depressing news that would normally squeeze a sympathetic apology from someone who probably didn't give a damn to begin with, Colress just smiled. "I see. That's too bad."
Ghetsis soon found himself flustered around this boy, not liking him at all. Colress was pompous, he made sure Ghetsis realized he was very smart for his age, and did not hesitate from speaking his mind about everything. Ghetsis would have asked Zinzolin what the hell his problem was, why was he bringing some stupid little kid to hang around with them, but he let his annoyance slide off his back in favor of enjoying the fair.
While the three of them purchased some food from a concession stand, Zinzolin decided to strike up another conversation. "So, Ghetsis, did you know Colress is going to be a doctor like you?"
Not even looking at the younger one, but knowing the smile was there, Ghetsis ate his food while staring at the ground. "I'm not going to be a doctor anymore."
"What?"
That's right, Ghetsis remembered he hadn't really talked to Zinzolin in months. Since his parents died, he hadn't interacted with anyone at all, besides the residents inside his castle. And that was only when he absolutely had to.
"Why not, though? You went to school for 8 years, you're still going to have to go train for another 3 or 4. You worked so hard, why are you throwing it away?"
This time Ghetsis smiled, looking up from the ground to his friend's eyes. "Because what's the point? I already have money and power. I don't need something like that anymore. I didn't want to become a doctor from the start anyway. It was just something I gave myself to do to take my mind off things."
Zinzolin sank in his seat a little. Colress just ate, appearing to be about as interested in the conversation as the strangers passing them by were. "But...Ghetsis, I still don't understand how you could throw it all away."
"It's not important to me. Why do you care anyway? The only thing life is about is growing up, becoming successful, making as much money as you can, and then doing whatever you want. I already have money to do with what I want." He stared at his food again, half-eaten. "I just don't care anymore. I never cared from the start. My parents left me a fortune, so why should I even become a doctor when I already have enough money to sustain me for my entire life? What sense does that make? You work for money, everyone does. Nobody likes their jobs, no matter what, it's always to make money and I already have that, so what's your point, Zinzolin?"
His friend shook his head, seeming no longer interested in eating. "It seems like such wasted time. All that work for nothing. You wasted 8 years of your time that you can't get back."
"Maybe it wasn't wasted time to me."
Zinzolin looked up again. "What do you mean?"
Ghetsis just laughed before finishing what was left on his plate.
The next few hours were spent solely riding roller coasters, peeking at the awful stores with their horrible merchandise, and chatting idly. Zinzolin had finally dropped the doctor conversation and instead steered toward a more interesting topic. Like Colress. Ghetsis still didn't like him, but Zinzolin seemed fascinated with him. "He's studying pokemon."
Ghetsis hated him even more. "Great. Just like every other doctor who devotes their lives towards those stupid monsters." That's why he specifically wanted to study people, so he could cut them up. Not that he would get to do that anymore. Ghetsis was not stupid, but that didn't mean he couldn't fantasize about it.
Colress finally contributed to the conversation instead of just smiling. "I am interested in what they are capable of, but I have studied humans too. Would you like me to examine you? I'm quite confident in my abilities."
Ghetsis rolled his eyes. "I'd rather saw my own arm off, thanks."
Colress chuckled then, his small smile changing to a grin. "You are very hateful toward people, aren't you?"
"I like to hate."
"I despise quite a few people myself, but wishing them death doesn't do anything. I'd rather work on them myself. Wouldn't it feel nice to open them up while they scream and watch their minds go into a frenzy through their eyes while their body suffers? Of course, only an insane person would think like that, but I am not insane."
Arching his eyebrows, Ghetsis just stared at the younger boy, still hating him. "Why aren't you in high school." He demanded, he didn't ask.
"I skipped a few grades because of my intelligence."
Zinzolin smirked from where he stood off to the side, nibbling on some cotton candy he'd bought. "I thought Colress was a pretty cool guy, Ghetsis. Don't you think he's cool?"
"No."
"You'll warm up to him."
As much as he hated Colress, Ghetsis couldn't bring himself to feel loathing toward him. Not like he loathed most people. When he thought about it realistically, it wouldn't hurt to have an extra doctor lying around the castle at his expense. Zinzolin could live there too. Ghetsis didn't mind so much having a few more people walking around, especially ones he could relate to.
The three continued their idle chit chat for awhile after that, snacking on Zinzolin's cotton candy like they were children, when Ghetsis became aware of a kid wandering around near them. He hadn't really been paying attention, but slowly, out of the corner of his eye, his mind became alert to the fact that a small girl holding a stuffed toy was pacing back and forth near where they were sitting. Turning to get a good look at her, he noticed she was crying. Back and forth, back and forth, she walked, desperate, her face pleading with people around her who didn't appear to be paying the slightest bit of attention. Then she held her head down, hugged her stuffed toy, and cried silently into it, rocking on her feet.
"What is it?" Zinzolin noticed Ghetsis was spacing out, looking off in another direction, until he spied the little girl too. "Oh. She's probably lost. These stupid parents can't keep up with their stupid children. Let them come find her."
"Yeah." Still, Ghetsis stared, not knowing why he was suddenly fascinated by her, or why she even caught his attention to begin with. She wasn't a baby, she looked around 10 years old, maybe older. Too old to be hugging onto a stuffed animal like that, he thought anyway. There was something about her he couldn't put his finger on. He couldn't stop staring. And he found he loved watching her cry. He loved, even from where he was sitting, seeing how brilliant her eyes looked while they were bloodshot from tears, how her hair fell into perfect curls around her face, how her cheeks were red from either embarrassment or fear, or maybe both, and how she hugged onto that toy like it would protect her.
She was beautiful.
"...etsis. Ghetsis?"
Blinking and holding his forehead to partially hide his face, Ghetsis turned back to Zinzolin who was starting to look worried.
"Are you okay?"
Colress smiled as he took some more cotton candy from the bag Zinzolin carried. "He seems preoccupied with that kid. Do you want to help her find her parents? She's obviously lost and nobody is helping her. People can be so cruel, really." Colress's words never matched his expression. Smiling, he was always smiling, and it was driving Ghetsis up the wall.
"God dammit." Ghetsis grit his teeth, trying to turn away, trying not to look back at the little girl who had seated herself next to a concession stand and was rocking, so, so close to them. He could see freckles on her face from where he sat. Everyone seemed so completely oblivious to her, it was insane. But, he couldn't stop watching her. Because she seemed so beautiful to him, she seemed perfect. Perfect, in a way he absolutely loved. Her face reddened, those tears still falling, that look of fear and hopelessness, it was perfect.
Ghetsis stood from his seat, the sudden movement causing Zinzolin to drop the bag of cotton candy and stand with him, grabbing his arm. "Whoa, what are you doing?"
Shrugging his arm out of his friend's grip, he ignored him and instead walked toward the little kid, feeling a rush of excitement grow in him with every step. Closer and closer, until he could audibly hear her soft sobs and see tear drops that had fallen onto her arms that were still wrapped around the toy. And then he was right next to her, bending down where he could see faint freckles on her bare shoulders, that stood out so beautifully against her pale skin. How small she was as she rocked back and forth, he was entranced.
He touched her shoulder, and she froze, the only movement she made was to lift her head away from her toy and look up into his eyes.
She was absolutely perfect.
He found himself smiling, and feeling flustered, which made him angry at himself. Why was he nervous like this? "Are you lost?" Even to his own ears, it was strange hearing himself speak so softly. Normally he was grumpy and yelling at everyone, not showing concern for others like this. Or was it concern? It felt like he was enamored, shocked by what a rush seeing her cry gave him, seeing her in fear. It felt kind of good seeing such an expression on a person he realized was very small and helpless. It made him feel powerful and like he could do anything, even reach out and snap her neck if he wanted.
"Yes. I can't find my momma or papa." Even her voice was coated with a slight accent that made him smile.
"Would you like me to help you find them?" From where he was crouched down next to her, Ghetsis could almost feel Zinzolin and Colress's eyes staring through him, wondering what in the world he was doing, why he was even giving a second thought to some stupid kid.
Then she seemed to relax a little. Not smiling or slowing her tears, but he could see the tension in her shoulders disappear. It felt good, very, very good knowing he could change a person like this. "Please, will you help me?"
"Of course." And he extended his hand for her to take, which she did almost instantly, throwing so much trust onto him, a stranger, that it made him laugh a little. Her other hand cupped her toy and held it protectively against her. As Ghetsis straightened and stood, he gave the little girl a soft smile as he closed his fingers around her hand, not letting go. "When was the last time you saw your parents? Do you remember where you were?"
Nodding, she hugged onto her toy again. "We rode the ferris wheel and my papa said he wanted to get food. I went to the bathroom with momma, but it was so crowded, I lost her."
Ghetsis smirked a little, feeling himself shake with excitement at the thought of touching her, leading her around like he was doing. And what morons her parents were, not keeping up with her like they should have. They deserved to be separated from their kid for not keeping their eye on her. He never felt more in control or powerful before as he began heading back toward Zinzolin and Colress. He could literally do anything to this kid, and that made him smile, knowing he had full control, knowing she could do nothing about it. "I think there's a place closer to the city where we can have them paged. I'll take you there. What's your name?"
The small hand wrapped in his seemed to relax a little, and her tears finally stopped, even though he wished they hadn't. He wanted to see her cry more. "Natural."
"It's nice to meet you, Natural."
Then she smiled, the dimples in her cheeks visible. She was more beautiful when she was in tears, though.
Hastening his walk, causing Natural to trip a few times, Ghetsis gave a nod at Zinzolin who was staring at him like he was insane from where they had been eating. Colress was still smiling, but stood alongside Zinzolin and followed him toward Ghetsis's side. He held Natural's hand tighter as if the other two meant to take her away from him.
"Ghetsis." Zinzolin looked a little afraid, because this was so out of character for Ghetsis to be showing any interest in helping someone else, no matter who they were. "What-um. What are you doing?"
"We're going to the city. The subway."
"But...why?"
Ghetsis didn't answer, he simply walked past him, tightening his grip on Natural's hand until she cried out. "Shh!" And now he wasn't smiling anymore. He could feel his heart beating so hard in his chest, it was starting to hurt. Bile began to rise in his stomach. It was such a rush, and he liked it. He liked knowing this was insane and twisted, and he liked the tiny sounds of fear coming from the girl. This is what happened when people fed their trust to someone, so she was stupid for it. But he loved the thought of scaring her. She was just a kid after all, but she should have known better.
"Ghetsis, what the fuck are you doing?" Zinzolin rushed to keep up with Ghetsis's long strides, his voice starting to quiver with fear for what exactly Ghetsis was planning. He was not as tall as him, and Natural was almost dragged behind him, starting to cry again from him squeezing her hand too tight.
"Mister, please-"
"I told you, we're going to the subway." Completely ignoring Natural's small voice, Ghetsis continued walking. The whole while they hurried past rides and crowds of people, nobody seemed to give a second glance at the odd scene of the three older men carting around a crying little girl. People really were stupid.
Zinzolin furrowed his brow, obviously frazzled and frustrated by Ghetsis's indirect answers. "Yeah, I got that, but what the hell are you planning to do, leave her there or what? Why are we doing this?"
"No, just shut up." Ghetsis pushed past a few crowds of people who wouldn't get out of his way until he hissed out through his teeth, "God dammit" when Natural tripped and fell, crying again. "Shut the fuck up." And her face was absolutely beautiful when she looked up at him in horror instead of relief like before. He snatched up her arm, squeezing it so hard that she choked out a scream, before he lifted her like she weighed nothing, until she was near his face and he could whisper in her ear, "If you scream, I'll kill you." She stayed completely still, not even crying anymore as he carried her away, Zinzolin looking frightened and Colress still smiled, like the entire thing was funny.
"Ghetsis, are you insane?!" Zinzolin's face was frozen in shock as he struggled to keep up with his friend after hearing what he'd said to the kid, Colress tailing him. The crowds were starting to die down as they made their way through the amusement park, and finally into the city where there were less people. "Put the kid down and let's go home. You're not feeling well. You can't just-"
"Don't god damn tell me that." Ghetsis was angry now, his voice rising with every word, until Zinzolin was shrinking back, terrified. "I'm taking her with me and both of you are going to shut the fuck up, or I'll make sure you never talk again, do you understand?" The rush was being replaced by nerves as it settled in with him what exactly he was doing. He had snatched up a little kid and was carrying her off with him to his castle. Yes, yes, it made such a wonderful feeling boil in his stomach, until the butterflies were making him sick. It felt like he was high, high off of taking this child away and seeing such fear in her. Power made him feel very good.
The white noise that came with the crowds of people had died down by the time they reached the city, the air strangely constricted by horrible silence when they came upon the subway.
Zinzolin stood in front of Ghetsis then before he could make his way down the stairs, trying to keep his eyes off the crying little girl and stare Ghetsis in the eye. "I've known you for awhile, and..." He trailed off before continuing, only making Ghetsis's temper flare the more silence set in. "Just tell me what you're thinking of doing. If all you want to do is leave her in the subway, that's fine, but you're acting so strange. This isn't like you." Ghetsis could tell he was terrified, he was afraid of what he would do to her. Which was strange for Zinzolin to show sympathy for people. Ghetsis had thought he despised people like he did, but maybe he had a soft spot for children.
He didn't care. Ghetsis tightened his grip around Natural's thin legs, feeling himself sweat with excitement when he felt her trembling. Her fear felt so good. "I'm taking her home with me. Are you going to stop me?"
If he had to plow his way through his friend, he would. If he had to fight him off or even kill him, he would.
But then. "No. Of course not."
"Then get out of the way."
Obedient, Zinzolin moved to the side, lowering his head when Ghetsis pushed past him down the stairs to the subway.
The subway ride home was strained.
Ghetsis made Natural sit beside him, Zinzolin on her other side, and Colress sat on Ghetsis's other side. He wanted to make sure she didn't run off. Zinzolin still looked worried, but he stayed silent this time, probably from fear of angering Ghetsis any further. Colress never said a word, but his smile was starting to disappear. Maybe he was realizing the situation was getting out of control.
When Natural trembled in her seat, Ghetsis could feel every move she made, and it was driving him insane. Reaching over, he put his arm around her, holding her closer to him, not to comfort her, but to make damn sure she didn't try to run off. She must have realized early on something was terribly wrong. She hadn't spoken since they were at the amusement park, which Ghetsis frowned at. He liked hearing the fear shaking in her voice. He especially loved the look she gave him when he threatened to kill her. Of course, he wasn't going to do that, but it worked. She stopped trying to get away.
He still couldn't figure out why he was doing this. Why did he care about some stupid little kid? He didn't, though. He could have cared less about her, but-he couldn't figure it out. Seeing how helpless she was, and realizing he had the power to do anything made him snap. He wanted to feel like he could do absolutely anything to her, knowing there were no consequences, knowing she was completely at his mercy.
It felt good knowing he could do what he want, knowing he could have her.
And she was beautiful, she was. Those freckles on her shoulders and face were so perfect on her. He couldn't get enough of the way her hair framed her face, how small she looked in that pink dress. He wanted her out of it, he wanted to see her entire body.
The ride continued on in silence for the rest of the trip, until the breaks squealed and Ghetsis took her hand, squeezing it, not even bothering to threaten her again. She moved when he did, which satisfied him. They were the only people in the cart, but Ghetsis still couldn't risk someone seeing something odd or hearing him if he had to tell her he would kill her again.
She was shaking, but silent, as were Zinzolin and Colress when they exited the train, and finally walked up the stairs of the subway. It was only a short walk from the city to his castle.
Then Zinzolin spoke up, finally breaking the tension. "What are you going to do?"
Ghetsis didn't bother getting angry at him again. He just tugged Natural along beside him, trying not to look suspicious as crowds of people passed them by. "I'm taking her home with me."
"Why?"
"Because I want to." And that was it. Zinzolin stopped questioning him, Colress stayed silent, not even smiling anymore, and Ghetsis concentrated on making it back home.
The walk was just as strained as the ride, save for everyone's breathing as they walked uphill. Ghetsis normally didn't mind the walk from the city to the woods, but his body was running on adrenaline now. With his heart pounding so hard in his chest, he swore it hurt, he was surprised he hadn't had a nervous breakdown. The reality of what he was doing was plain and simple, but he knew at the same time he had the power and money to do what he wanted. It was still a rush, however, knowing he was kidnapping a little girl, knowing that soon she would be in his castle, knowing he was going to get her naked, and fuck her. Knowing she could do nothing about it made him smile. The maids would wonder what was going on, but he knew they were afraid of him, and wouldn't dare cross him if they found out what he was doing.
The castle came into view, and Ghetsis could hear the girl start crying beside him. She was so small next to him. He bent down to her, gripping her arms tight in case she tried to run, and smiled at her. "How old are you, Natural?"
She didn't answer right away, but he was patient. Besides, he liked watching her face as she struggled to form words and speak. "N-n-nine."
"You're very beautiful, Natural. I won't hurt you if you promise to listen to me. Do you promise?"
A slow nod.
"My name is Ghetsis. Say my name."
"Gh-Ghetsis."
He squeezed her shoulders tighter, loving how his name sounded in her slight accent. "This is my castle. When we go inside, you're going to see a lot of people, but if you speak to them or try to run away from me, I'll hurt you. Do you understand?" His smile never wavered the whole time he spoke, and it only grew wider when Natural's face lit up with fear at his statement. But slowly, she nodded, holding her head down and refusing to look at him. He would deal with that later, but for now, he didn't care. Taking her hand again, and ignoring the stares Colress and Zinzolin were giving him, he walked toward the door that led to the kitchen.
The warmth from inside hit them all like a wall when the door swung open. Ghetsis tightened his grip on Natural's hand, but she did as she was told. They walked past maids who stared at her, but she did not speak, run, or even look back at them. Nobody questioned why their lord was bringing a small girl into the castle, and maybe they didn't even care. Not a word was said, only solid stares were made as they made their way through the kitchen.
It had gotten late during the walk home, so by the time Ghetsis had gone through the dining room and up a few flight of stares, they were completely alone. The castle was normally bustling with people during the day. With the complete silence setting in, he swore he could hear his heart pounding in his chest. Zinzolin and Colress had followed him up until now, but when he reached the staircase where his room was located, he turned around to them, snatching Natural with him. "You two can stay here, but don't come up to this hallway. I don't want anyone up here tonight."
Still staring at the girl, Zinzolin nodded, his face showing signs of remorse, but he obeyed, as did Colress. They turned around and left, the only sound following after being their footsteps as they echoed down the halls.
Now alone, Ghetsis could hear Natural's raspy breathing, and he looked down at her. She was still staring at the floor, and he only just now noticed her toy was gone. She must have dropped it at the park, but she looked so skinny and frail without it. No more words were said until Ghetsis reached his room, locking them both inside.
His room had always been red. The comforter, the curtains, the small accents. All red. It was dark when they entered, the only light being from his lamp, but even that didn't help things. Ghetsis never was one for windows, least not in bedrooms. He didn't like the sun intruding on his sleep whenever it wanted, and curtains just didn't cut it sometimes.
"P-please."
Looking back down at Natural, he noticed she was shaking again, tears falling down and hitting the floor. She still refused to look up at him.
"What is it?"
"Wh-what do you w-want?" Now her knees were knocking together, which made him laugh a little. Her voice was turning desperate and he could hear the sobbing start to take over, strangling her speech. "M-my papa will get you money, if that's what you want. Please..."
"I already have enough money to sustain me until the day I die. I don't need your parents' piss poor coins."
The tiny hand in his grip tightened around him. "What do y-you want?"
Bending down to her, he reached out with the hand that wasn't holding onto her, and he lifted her face up to his to see her bloodshot eyes and tear-streaked face. "I want you to look at me, first of all." With the same hand, he moved it down to the straps on her dress, sliding one off her shoulder, exposing more of her freckles that were driving him insane. "Next, I want you out of this dress."
"No." And he was so surprised at her flat out defiance, he only stared at her as she moved away from him, the fear sunken into her eyes. "N-no. No."
"I'm not giving you a choice." His temper was flaring. How dare this...this little bitch tell him no? Again, he reached up, beginning to pull the dress down from her, and she pushed away from him, hard enough to cause him to lose the grip he had on her hand.
"NO! NO!" As she pushed him off her, she stumbled backward, falling up against the wall.
Enraged, Ghetsis took the chance and moved himself over her, making any escape impossible. Before she could scream at him again, he wrapped both hands around her throat, squeezing tight, loving, absolutely loving the fear in her eyes as she stared up at him, pleading at him with her stare. This would teach her a lesson. This would show her his word was law, this would show her everything. "You are not going to tell me no, you little shit." Harder, until she made a muffled cry under him, choking, trying to breathe, the tears still falling down and wetting his hands. "You're going to listen to me, aren't you? You're going to be a good girl and listen to me. Now when I tell you to undress, you're going to fucking do it, do you understand? I say what I mean, and when I say I'm going to hurt you, I will do it."
His hands were removed, and Natural sucked in air, choking as she fought to breathe, her hands moving up and massaging her neck. He wasn't going to take any shit from her. She was going to listen, or he would make her. Nothing angered him more than having an order be rejected.
But seeing her submissive calmed him down a little. She would listen now, he knew. Reaching forward again, he pulled her dress down, and she didn't fight back. He had to smile at her lack of everything. She was not curvy, she had no breasts, no anything, but it made him smile, knowing this was all his now. What she lacked now, she would get someday, though. Without her dress, he could see every little tremor of fear she made, he could see every freckle, every patch of pale skin.
He was getting hard, but he couldn't and didn't want to lose himself now. He wanted more of her. And he wanted her to do it.
After he pulled her panties off, he made her sit upright, and while he didn't immediately make her look him in the eye, he would one day. He could do whatever he wanted, but right now, he wanted her hands on him. He wanted to feel those tiny little pale fingers on his erection, rubbing up and down, up and down.
He unzipped his pants, and grabbed her hand in his, running his fingers over and over it. They were so soft, so small. Her sobs were heard, but he ignored them. Again, he told her, "If you do what I say, I won't hurt you." Then, "I'll teach you."
He took his time rubbing onto her hands, reveling in the soft feel of them, before he pulled her closer, almost into his lap, and put her hands on him. Up and down, he manipulated her, pumping, harder and harder, until he could feel precum seep out. He had already been hard before, but now he was losing control.
"P-please." Her sobs were small, but still heard in the silent room.
"Please what?" Gripping her hand tighter, he didn't want her running off on him while he was this far in. F-fuck, she was beautiful when she was naked.
"I'm scared."
"This is nothing to be scared of."
"I-I want my momma and p-papa."
"If they loved you, they wouldn't have lost you. Weren't you scared wandering around by yourself? Didn't I save you?"
And he couldn't take it anymore. Releasing her hand so she would pump him herself, he concentrated on the feeling, the itch that was climbing higher and higher, until he could feel himself losing it.
Then finally, the peak. He looked one last time at her face covered with tears before he exploded in her hand, absolutely loving the feeling of blacking out.
Natural screamed, moving back off him and stumbling to the floor, covering her face, screaming, "NO, NO, NO!" over and over.
Immediately, Ghetsis moved over to her, putting both arms around her and pulling her into him. He couldn't have her running off. He knew if she had the chance, she would tear open that door and run straight down the hallway until somebody helped her. All he did was hold her tighter. "Shh!" Her crying was getting annoying.
"PLEASE, I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY! TAKE ME HOME, PLEASE!"
"Calm down, you're okay! I'm not hurting you." But nothing he said seemed to be working, so he pulled her into his lap, biting his lip when her leg rubbed up against him. If she kept struggling like this, he would-
"T-take me home, take me home! I-I want my momma and papa! Please, please!"
Saying nothing, he continued holding her in his lap. It would do no good if he hit her, she would still cry. So, doing the only thing he could think of, he sat there, waiting, waiting patiently for her to calm down enough for him to unwrap his arms from her.
"I promise I won't hurt you if you listen to me."
Still shaking, her sobs quieted down to sniffles, Natural cried quietly in his lap, her head in his chest. "I want to go home."
Ghetsis said nothing, he only held her. Even when her sobs turned silent, even when she calmed down in his arms, even when she stopped shaking, he held onto her. He didn't care she was scared. She would get over it. If she continued doing this, he would have no choice but to start tying her to his bed, or maybe even drugging her. This was defiance, she was fighting back, and he hated it.
Digging his nails into her skin and causing her to flinch, he said what he told her before, "Don't tell me no. Don't fight me. If you tell me no, if you try and run away from me, or push me away, I'm going to hurt you. You will listen to me, do you understand?"
Not looking at him, not even moving anymore, Natural nodded.
It was almost too easy for him to get his way, but he liked it. Fighting only made things interesting for so long before Ghetsis got sick of being told no too much. Everything was given to him, everyone bent over backwards for him. Even this kid he snatched away, he was able to make her listen.
He could smile, because it made him feel very good knowing that others listened to him, knowing he was feared, knowing he could get whatever he wanted, no matter what it was.
All he wanted now was her.
When he lifted her off the floor, she did not move, or speak. Natural stayed still when he moved her onto the bed. After he took his pants off and made her rub him again until he was hard, she cried, but she listened. But after he made love to her into the bed until she was bleeding, sobbing and begging for him to let her go, she didn't try to run.
It was silent afterward. Natural didn't even cry anymore. Once Ghetsis pulled the covers over them, wrapped his arms around her tiny body, he kissed her.
It was exactly what he needed, a rush. A rush that let him know he was perfect, he was powerful, that he could have anything he wanted. All he wanted was to be perfect.
N couldn't remember what happened after Zorua died. He must have fallen asleep, he must have, because the last thing he remembered was holding her close to him, rocking back and forth, even singing to her like she could still hear him. And then he was on his floor, freezing, shivering. All he could think of was that his best friend was gone, that maybe Anthea or Concordia took her away after he fell asleep, and he was alone now.
The room had felt colder than ever. N had been freezing. He didn't want to move after that. Once he was able to get on his feet after staring at the clouds on his floor, he headed straight to bed and lay there all day long, thinking about Zorua, about how she was gone, and would never come back.
But it had been his fault. He was so stupid for it, and this was his punishment for realizing there would never be any leaving, he would not escape, his fantasies of living alone and traveling around would never come true.
It took killing the one thing he loved more than anything to make him realize this, finally, finally. After everything, he could see it so clearly now, and it made him angry. If only he had known before, if he had known how stupid it was to go out, to disobey his father, that he would find out, because N was too stupid to cover his tracks, had he known all of that, Zorua might still be alive. She might be with him now, under the covers, keeping him warm.
The bed was cold, his sheets were cold, but he was too mad at himself to try and make himself warmer. He deserved to be freezing like this. Everything that happened to him from then on, he deserved. It was punishment for killing Zorua, because everything had been his fault.
And that was it.
N had given up completely, he gave himself up to his father, both with his mind and body, he never back talked or defied him. Whatever Ghetsis told him to do, no matter how humiliating, or how much it hurt, N complied.
With N being so compliant, Ghetsis had become more calm. All he had to do was listen, all he had to do was obey and be a good boy, and he wasn't even hit most of the time anymore.
There were still those strange nights he came into N's room and seated himself at the foot of his bed, not moving, not talking, not doing anything. Just sitting. As always, N was too afraid to ask him why he did this, what was the point of it, but he had to figure it was the pills Colress had supplied his father with. They were supposed to make him calmer, and maybe it was that, plus N being compliant, that made Ghetsis more...tolerable.
It could even be considered bearable sometimes. Because if N did as he was told and he satisfied Ghetsis, he would be left alone. Ghetsis would not hit him, or even yell at him.
Because of N's disobedience before, he was not allowed outside of his room anymore, but he wasn't angry or upset about it. He deserved it, in every possible way, he deserved being trapped in his bedroom again, with nothing but his books, the ones that he hadn't ripped up, to keep him company and entertained.
Sometimes, but not often, Ghetsis would take him to his bedroom, and N would be forced to spend the night with him there. He didn't like his father's bedroom, because when Ghetsis left him in there all day until he came back for him that night, N had nothing to do. There were no books to read, no equations to solve, no stories to involve himself in. It was agony sitting around in a quiet room with nothing to do.
But maybe the worst part was that Ghetsis's door remained unlocked, but N knew better than to run. Before, maybe, maybe he would have taken a chance and ran until his feet blistered, until he was far enough away that he was sure his father would not find him. He knew better now. It wasn't even something he considered the times he spent in his father's room, mostly sitting on the bed and waiting, just waiting.
If he grew agitated enough, N would force himself off the bed in favor of wandering around the room, just to give himself something to do, because being still was torture. Ghetsis's room was so plain. There were only the basic necessities there. A bed, a drawer full of clothes, the other door that led to the bathroom, the nightstand with the red lamp on it. There were no decorations, no pictures, no knick-knacks, there was nothing.
One day, N found himself going through his father's things. If Ghetsis found out, he would surely beat N black and blue, but N made sure to put things back exactly as he found them. He wouldn't be doing something so stupid if he weren't so desperate to have something to do.
The drawers were pulled back and N found all sorts of clothes, things he'd never even seen his father wear. There were normal clothes, things he'd seen a lot of people wear in Nimbasa, like blue jeans and t-shirts, which was strange. N couldn't picture his father wearing anything other than his golden and purple robes. It was difficult picturing him wearing street clothes like this. N continued digging through them, finding turtle necks, slacks, coats, and even summer clothes like shorts and tank tops. It was strange though. N unfolded a pair of shorts and realized they were far too small for his father's large build. Why would he keep clothes too small for himself? N's only guess were that maybe they had been his clothes when he was younger and he just hadn't gotten around to throwing them away. Maybe he was saving them for N. A lot of N's clothes were hand-me-downs. He hadn't really thought all of his clothes were actually Ghetsis's old ones. It made him a little nauseous thinking that everything he'd ever worn had originally been clothes his father wore when he was a child, that his body wasn't much different than a younger version of Ghetsis.
Folding the shorts back the way they were, N closed the drawers and instead decided to explore the bathroom. Again, he made sure to put everything back in its place so his father wouldn't know he'd been snooping through his things. It wasn't even that N was all that curious, there was just nothing else to do. He normally could have cared less what shampoo his father bathed with, or what kind of towels he dried himself with, but now everything seemed fascinating. N pulled the shower curtain back, looking over the bottles of shampoo and soap. He didn't open them or move them around like he had done with the clothes. If the scents were too strong, he would end up making himself sick and he did not want to spend the remainder in this room fighting nausea until Ghetsis came in.
Closing the curtain back, N turned around and began going through the cabinets. There were towels, wash cloths, pretty much everything he had in his own bathroom. It wasn't like he expected to find secrets hidden amongst everything. What would Ghetsis have to hide anyway? Closing one cabinet and opening a small drawer below it, N felt his stomach drop when he saw what was inside, not expecting it.
Rope, duct tape, straps, something that resembled a collar, and a long knife stared up at him from inside. There were more arrangements of black things he couldn't make out, but he closed the drawer until the contents inside rattled, not wanting to find out what they were. He had recognized the knife as the one Ghetsis used to tear through his clothes once. He hadn't used it since then, and N hoped he never would again. The thought of his father holding a deadly weapon while N was helpless made him horrified that his daddy might accidentally kill him.
When he turned away from the cabinets, N found himself staring at the bathroom mirror. It made him remember he had shattered his own a few days ago, and that it was still broken, not that he cared. Ghetsis hadn't noticed, because he never went into N's bathroom. Nobody noticed. He would get in trouble if his father ever knew, though, because if he asked him why he had punched his mirror in, N would have to tell him the truth, that he was sick of seeing his reflection.
N couldn't lie to his daddy anymore.
And his father never lied, so why should N? He had told him meals wouldn't be brought to him as much anymore since N was gaining weight, and Ghetsis had kept his word. If N was lucky, he would get to eat cereal for dinner, but that was it. For the rest of the day, the only sound he could hear was his stomach growling and begging for food. All he could think of was how hungry he was, how much pain he was in from cramping.
He never complained though, about anything. No matter what happened, no matter how much pain he was in, how miserable he was, how humiliated, N knew it was all necessary punishment. He could never forgive himself for killing Zorua, and this was his responsibility.
Once everything in his father's room was back in place, N had checked twice to make sure things were as they had been, he seated himself on the bed, and waited. The hours ticked by, N grew antsy, he fidgeted, he stretched, he did any kind of movement he could think of until the bedroom door opened.
And N always gave himself over completely. He knew it would happen, that there was no escape, there would never be any running, he would never get to go outside again. He knew now, that this was his life, and he accepted it. So when Ghetsis set to work undressing himself and his son, N told him how much he loved him, how very much he loved his daddy, until Ghetsis finished and they both fell asleep.
When N awoke next, the first thing that registered with him was that he felt horrible. Not the same horrible feeling he got when with his daddy. As he tried turning over in bed, his stomach churning at the sight of his daddy's sleeping face meeting him, he tried swallowing so he would not vomit. His shifting drove Ghetsis from sleep, but he didn't care. N curled into his middle, the sickening feeling hitting him and giving him chills.
"What's the matter with you?"
Closing the covers around him, N stared at the wrinkles in the sheets before speaking. It was still so hard for him to make eye contact, but luckily, it wasn't something Ghetsis pressed too much. "I don't feel well."
Frowning, Ghetsis reached forward, putting his hand against N's forehead. Instantly, N closed his eyes at the cold feeling, because it felt nice against his burning face. Still, he shivered, even though he was hot, and the nausea would come and go, making him feel that much worse. N hated this feeling so much.
"You're burning up." But N already knew that. Saying nothing else, Ghetsis leaned from the bed before fishing around the floor for his clothes, dressing himself, and heading out of the room, closing the bedroom door behind him.
Everything was cold now. N curled himself into a ball before digging himself down under the sheets. It was warmer now, but he was still shivering, freezing. Feeling his stomach churning and drowning with nausea, N couldn't take it anymore. He had to get to the bathroom, get off the bed, get out of the room. He was being suffocated. It was hard coming off the bed without the sheets, because the air chilled his skin, but he rushed to the restroom, instead finding a towel he could wrap himself up in. It may have looked silly, but he didn't care. Now with some warmth around him, N bent over the toilet and vomited.
It made his eyes water, and he coughed to rid himself of this feeling. But he was glad. Everyday, all day long, he felt a feeling like this. The one that never went away, the one that coiled into his stomach and rested there, cramping, hurting, making him have nightmares every night where he couldn't sleep. He was glad he could vomit, at least to make himself feel better.
And he did feel better afterward. While he was still leaning over the toilet in case it happened again, he wrapped the towel around himself tighter, to hide his naked body from himself. It didn't matter, because nobody was in here. He was alone, and he couldn't even count the times he'd been naked like this, especially in front of his father. But he hated himself so much, he hated it, he hated this, he hated this feeling. He hated everything, especially himself.
Tears came to his eyes, but not from throwing up. N couldn't help the times he spent like this, thinking of everything that had happened to him. This was a horrible life, this wasn't normal. Not normal. Nobody should have to live the way he was, but he had already told himself a million times before that this was the way things were going to be. Maybe even for the rest of his life, but that was the price he had to pay.
Still, N hated the thought of living here. Every day, every minute, every second agonized him until he wanted to-he couldn't even think. He thought it would be so easy, just to give up, just to say he could do it, he could live this way, he could please his father whenever he wanted.
But he couldn't do it anymore.
He couldn't sleep, he wasn't allowed to eat, which only made his stomach hurt that much more than it already did, he couldn't function normally anymore. The only thing he knew to do anymore was obey, but it was killing him.
Whenever Ghetsis said come, he'd come. When he'd order him to speak, N spoke. Whenever he'd give any order whatsoever, N obeyed, or else he was hit for it. N hadn't been hit in a long time, because he was a good person for his daddy.
N had thought there were good people in this castle. All he had were good memories of Concordia and Anthea taking care of him when he was little. Some of those memories were clouded with things his daddy had done to him, but he remembered the girls the most. They were always nice, even though they didn't smile much. They brought him food, they taught him how to read, they taught him how to do math, which he fell in love with. It always fascinated him, and both of them always urged him to push himself with it, to challenge himself so he could grow into an intelligent adult.
But what was the point of all of that if this was his life now? Why would they give him hope, hope that he could leave one day, live on his own, maybe travel around until he figured out what he wanted to do? Why would they tell him stories about the outside, about how he would leave one day, if it all meant absolutely nothing?
He loved them both. They were like his sisters, they were his family, along with his daddy. When he saw their faces when they walked in to bring him his meal for the night, he couldn't help but feel loathing toward them now. The girls who took care of him during childhood showed no more love or care for him than the floor did. They were just doing their job. That's all they had ever done his entire life. Just their job. It wasn't love, or care, or even motherly. Ghetsis ordered them, and they obeyed.
And no matter what happened to him, N knew he would always end up right back here, back in Ghetsis's room, the feeling of fear always, always burrowed down into his stomach as he waited for his father to return. Because the inevitable knowledge that he would be raped over and over was enough to drive him insane. He knew it would happen, and he knew he couldn't do anything about it.
The only option was to give up, but he couldn't even do that now. Maybe it was just human instinct, he didn't know.
N cried. His stomach churned and he vomited into the toilet once more, his eyes watering, but he cried. Why was he even here? What was the point of all of this? Colress had said he was giving Ghetsis pills to make him better, but they weren't working. This still happened, and it would always happen. N was going to die here, with his daddy, if he didn't go first. Then, N didn't know what anymore.
He should have run. All those times before, he felt so incredibly stupid for it. He should have run far away, ignored everyone in this place, ignored his fear, and kept running until his feet bled. The opportunities were handed to him, but N was too stupid to take them.
All he could think of now was that this was it. When he flushed the toilet, feeling a little better, and returned to bed to curl up into the sheets and fall asleep, this was it. It was all over for him. He would wait for his daddy to return, and then it would just be the same thing over and over.
When sleep took over, N dreamt of Zorua. He missed her so much, but he could feel a little better knowing she wasn't suffering with him anymore. She was free.
Then the door squeaked open, jarring N out of sleep. He didn't raise his head, because he didn't have to. He knew it was Ghetsis. Curling under the sheets, N tried to stay warm when his father leaned over the bed, feeling his forehead again, and N could hear him swear under his breath.
Did daddy love him? N wanted to think he did. He liked thinking he did.
"Take this." N was forced to sit up when Ghetsis handed him a glass of water and some pills. "Colress said they'd make you feel better."
Yes, daddy had to love him. He had to. Why would he care otherwise?
N swallowed the pills as fast as he could without choking, so he could get back under the covers. His entire body was hot, but it was still freezing in the room, especially since he didn't have any clothes on. He was too tired to put them on earlier. With the medicine out of the way, N wrapped the covers back around himself, curling into a ball. The nausea was gone for the most part, but it would return in small waves, making him curl into himself to try and stop the horrible feeling.
Ghetsis left the room again.
N didn't know how long he'd been gone, because he fell asleep. He wanted to dream of Zorua some more, because it made him smile to himself knowing she was happy somewhere, knowing she was out of this awful place.
More N's mommy angst and shit next chapter. Oh look, this fic has two more chapters left. WE'RE ALMOST THROUGH CAN YOU BELIEVE IT.