(warning, tasteless humor in this one)

Hooray for you guys! I got two reviewers but it's not enough. The rest of you need to get out of da box and leave messages! If you don't my stuffed puppy Jellybean will make you (grrrrr). So anyway let's recap and torture todays lucky contestant.

Fan-to-fiction: just sit tight and keep those knickers on (no seriously we have a lot of sexual harassment claims because you people wont stay off some of the characters. Please, now, don't make this hard).

I-Love-Trunks1: (see fan-to-fiction)

Now no body wanted to ask anything of anyone so I'm going to ask this one again. This one is to Chichi. Chichi say something in Yiddish!

Chichi: huh?

Me: go on, say something in Yiddish! Please that would be awesome!

Chichi: um…oy…vey?

Me: WOOHOO OY VEY!!....sorry had a moment of insanity there…

Chapter 15

Cell stood outside of the bathroom stall at McDonalds. Mirai wanted to find a place to hide out. Cell thought this was a good idea until Mirai lead him to the bathroom then locked himself up in a stall in the bathroom and proceeded to cry and bitch at Cell through the unlocked door about the whole ordeal. "I haven't…haven't *sniffles* done anything mean to…to…hic..any of them!"

"Come on now Trunks, your making a mess of yourself over a bunch of people who don't care."

"They don't care *hic* do they!? If they cared any they would ask me but no *sob* they have to talk shit about me behind my back!"

"Hey Trunks, pull yourself together you are acting like such a girl right now."

"Your *hic* your *hic* your so mean to me to!" Mirai began to sob in his handkerchief. Cell listened to him blow his nose then he heard a loud clicking noise.

"Trunks?" he said, no answer, "Trunks? You there man!" There was a loud hissing noise and Cell swung the door opened. He had a cigarette in one hand and a beer in the other.

"Leave me alone to my misery, I have no friends."

"Where did you get beer?"

"Go away you bastard." Cell would have gladly walked away at this point but didn't.

"Hey, can I have a beer to," he asked.

"Why should I give you one? You called me a girl!"

"Yea, I know, but if I wasn't your friend would I still be here?" Trunks couldn't argue with that. He gave Cell a beer out of his magic pocket and they two sat in the McDonalds bathroom stall drinking.

"I'm a failure man," said Mirai shaking his head still crying.

"No you're not," said Cell patting him on the shoulder and drinking more magic beer. He carefully slipped another out of Mirai's pocket.

"Yes I am. I couldn't save my timeline so I'm a failure as a hero. I can't deal with being evil anymore so I'm a failure as a villain. I can't stand night time anymore, I'm a failure as a vampire. I probably have a gang load of kids out there I have never even heard of, I'm just a failure at life man!"

"Look Trunks, we're all failures. I'm a villain so I'm a failure at being a hero, I was killed by Gohan so I'm a failure as a villain. I don't have any kids but I'm still a failure at life. How many kids do you have anyway?" Mirai started to sob even more. Some how being compared to Cell made him even more upset. "I don't know how many kids I have. Sure there have been phone calls that I avoided and deleted after the message was played back, and I have had a few girls that tell me in person they are pregnant but then I traded phone numbers asking if we can talk at another time and then never call them back, but I really don't know. I denied every one of them!"

"But Trunks, you're a vampire, you have to stay hidden. I mean, you where taken from Vegeta and he didn't see you for almost a whole year! You can't beat yourself up over that, what would happen if you did keep in contact, someone could get hurt."

Trunks's sobs turned to silent tears as he listened to Cell. He just shook his head, "I hate you sometimes." Cell just shrugged and got a fist in his face causing him to fly back crashing into the tiles on the wall causing several cracks. Cell pulled himself back up as best as he could.

"Feel better," he asked sarcastically.

"Yes, yes in fact I do. Now we need to find those dragonballs so we can wish for non of this kill me business never happened."

"Yea, we need to put things back they way they should be," said Cell. Both of them mentally smiling to themselves. They walked out to the parking lot and Mirai spotted a guy in a kick ass topless car (use your imagination, but it must be in yellow and black!). He lead Cell in the mans direction and pulled a gun out. He started banging on the window and the driver looked up and saw a crazed teenager with a gun screaming at him.

"GET OUT OF THE CAR! GET OUT OF THE FUCKIGN CAR! OUT BITCH!" The man got out of the car in a hurry. Mirai kicked him in the ass making the man fall to the ground so as to add effect to his fearful act. Mirai jumped in the car and Cell jumped in the passengers seat. They screeched the tires as they drove out of the parking lot and they blasted music as they drove off on the street and headed for the highway turning on the dragon radar.

"Trunks," said Cell, "did we just carjack that man?"

"We sure did Cell, we sure did." (special thanks to family guy)

"So why don't we just fly to get the dragonballs?"

"Cell, don't question me, I know what I'm doing. We took a car because it's cool looking." Cell just shook his head, it seemed like a waist of time, but Trunks obviously knew what he was doing.

………………………………….

"What is it," asked Chibi Trunks looking at the paper in his mothers hands as his mom silently started to tear up.

"Nothing honey," she said forcing a fake smile on. Trunks humphed, he knew better, his mom was not crying over nothing.

"where is Mirai at," he pressed.

"Why don't you go outside with Goten and play in the water," she suggested.

"But I wanna know," he nagged.

"Go do what you where told boy," snapped Vegeta. Trunks sighed in defeat. He and Goten left the house and headed toward the water to go play. He knew better then to try and listen in. He tried that once and his dad knew he was there. He wouldn't make that mistake again. Goten started making a sandcastle. "Hey let's have a sand war," said Goten excited. Trunks was busy sitting in the sand pouting with his arms crossed, looking at the house. Goten noticed his friends distress. "What's wrong Trunks," he asked.

"They're hiding something," he said not looking at Goten.

"What are they hiding?"

"I don't know, but I'm gonna find out, when the grown ups fall asleep."

……………………………

Piccolo's ears twitched slightly. "Hey Vegeta," he said, "come here a second."

"What is it," he said. Piccolo told him what he just overheard.

"Don't worry about that," said Vegeta, he held the letter over a candle and let it set fire. He threw it in the sink as the others watched him curiously. He then took out a piece of paper and wrote something on it and handed it to Bulma.

"Keep that on you," he said. Bulma took it and put it in her purse.

"Vegeta," said Bulma, "you need to go find Mirai before he does something really stupid!"

"Settle down Bulma," said Vegeta grabbing his ears, "I will find him don't worry, how hard can it be."

…………………12 hours later………….

"Dammit," cursed Vegeta as he searched high and low. He thought he would just follow his son's ki, but as it turns out Mirai is very good at hiding his ki. If he didn't want to be found, he wasn't going to be. "This is a waist of time,"

…………….12 hours ago………

"So the first one is here," said Trunks looking up at the large creepy looking mansion that looked like something out of a Tim Burton film.

"Well, according to this radar," said Cell. They both stepped out of the car when a large green van pulled up. Cell and Mirai exchanged looks. Out stepped a blond man followed by a red head in a purple dress, a red head in an orange sweater vest and a red skirt. They opened up the bag and a large brown dog with black spots came out followed by a hippie with dirty blond hair.

"Who are they," asked Cell.

"Fashion criminals," suggested Mirai.

"Alright gang," said the blond one, "this place is good to see if we can spend the night."

"Like, are you sure man, cause this place looks awfully spooky," said the hippy.

"Don't be so paranoid shaggy," said the red head, "what are the chances that this haunted looking mansion is haunted?"

"Yea," said the blond who seemed to be the leader, "there is no one here that is trying to kill us."

"Like are you sure about that Freddy, because every house we have ever gone to that looks this spooky there is usually someone here trying to kill someone else or ruin them in some way and, like, we always get caught up in the middle of it."

"Don't worry," said nerdy red head, "I'm sure nothing mysterious will happen here."

"Velma's right," said the first red head, "quit being so jumpy."

"Like whatever you say," said the one named Shaggy.

"Yo," shouted Trunks, "who the hell are you people!"

"Well, I'm Freddy, that is Shaggy, our dog Scooby, that's Velma, and this is Daphne. We're Mistery Inc." Mirai and Cell both wanted to throw up. He was just so energies and 'We're a team!' like it was sickening! The girl Velma, the one in orange and red, seemed really perky and stupid. Daphne seemed rather ditzy but whatever, she was a girl right! At least this was the way Mirai saw her, a pretty thing in the wrong place at the right time, yummy. Shaggy and his great Dane Scooby looked like a couple of pushovers.

"Look, we have an actual reason to be here so if you don't mind leaving that would make us really happy," said Cell.

"No wait," said Mirai, "let them come in with us. This is America, they can do whatever they want."

"Gee thanks," said Fred with a big smile. Mirai forced a smile on his face. Fred lead the way with Mirai and Cell tagging at the end.

"What are you doing," hissed Cell.

"Having a bit of fun," said Mirai with a big smile.

"What? We need to get those dragonballs together, this is ridiculous, we are wasting time now."

"Now, now, Cell, let's get to know our new 'friends' a bit."

"No," said Cell now realizing what was going on, "no, not now, you can't be serious."

"Look, Cell, I don't know if you noticed but this place is perfect! Look at this place, there is a bog right over there. That window is broken, the damn porch is falling apart! This is perfect."

"Well I can't deny your amazing observation skills, but don't you want to get this over with quick?"

"Not really," said Mirai running to catch up with Shaggy. "Hey man," he said, "what are you guys doing out here in the middle of no where."

"Well man it's a long story, we where driving along this foggy road and Fred decided that this was like a groovy place to stop."

"Kind of creepy looking isn't it?"

"Like, tell me about it. It happens every time. Fred picks the place and the next thing you know a monster is trying to kill us. No matter how many times I try to warn him, he never learns man."

"So why not stand up to him man, don't let him push you around, be more assertive."

"No, I'm a pretty passive guy actually," said Shaggy, not wanting to cause unneeded waves.

"Well, okay man, your choice."

"What about you, what's your reason for being here?"

"Owner has something that belongs to me, we are picking it up."

"Really? What is it?"

"My lucky wish maker," said Mirai with a smile. He didn't mean for it to come out quite that way, but what the hell, he said crazy shit all the time.

"Wish maker?"

"Yea, it grants wishes, so I've been told, never actually tried it myself."

"Think you can wish me a large pizza?"

"……you're high aren't you…"

……………

"You are all welcome in my home," said the old lady who owned it, "but I must warn you that my late husband haunts these halls."

"Yes that's nice lady," interrupted Cell, "can we just have a look around."

"Cell, don't be rude," snapped Mirai, "ma'am we would love to join you."

"Well dinner is this way."

The two plus their new found companions followed her to the dinner hall. Fred was impressing Daphne with an impressive quarter back pass in a football game he was in, but her attention was more toward the two new comers. Why did one of htem look like a giant grasshopper?

Mirai caught sight of her looking there way, and he slowly slid his ankle across her leg. Daphne's back straitened, she looked at Mirai and blushed a bit. Was this going to be the night she finally got laid! There was just no way! She had been working on Fred for years but the man was just a moron and didn't see she wanted to fuck him. This one didn't seem to be very shy at all. She pulled her foot out of the purple shoe and ran her toe up his leg in response. Mirai smiled at her and she returned it.

Shaggy and Scooby where having an eating contest and Velma and Cell talked science. The old lady watched in fascination, it was so nice to have people around again.

They finished dinner and she took them to there separate rooms.
……………..4 hours later……………

Daphne snuck out of her room and wandered over to where Mirai's room was. She snuck in very quietly and climbed on top of him. Mirai sturred asleep and got a very pleasant surprise when he saw the young woman on top of him slowly unbuttoning her top. He smiled and reached up to kiss her.

In the mean time Cell was looking for the dragonball and snuck around the living room with the radar in hand. He finally found it in the chimney. He looked around and found a chimney sweep and proceeded to hit the dragonball stuck inside. A large clowed of smoke landed on him turning him black. He got soot in his eyes causing him to close them and walk around clumsily. He needed to find a bathroom to wash it all off. He started stumbling up the stairs.

At this point Fred, Velma, Shaggy, and Scooby all woke up at the sound of moaning and ran out into the hall. "What was that," asked Velma.

"Wrigh don't wknow," said Scooby, the talking dog!

"Let's split up gang," said Fred.

"Velma, you shaggy and Scooby go look down that end of the hallway and me and Daphne will go on that end over there!"

"Like, Fred, where is Daphne," asked Shaggy. The four of them looked around and saw she was no where to be found.

She was no where to be found because she was busy gettin' some. It was the most amazing experience of her life. Mirai was defiantly equip for this kind of work and he knew how to use what the good lord gave him. She tried to keep quiet so as not to wake anyone but it was kind of hard and she let a few groans out. It just hurt so good!

Fred decided, against his better wishes, that they should stick together. They walked to the end of the hall then turned around toward the stares when a large black thing was falling and tripping all over the hall like it was blind.

"MONSTER," shouted Scooby and Shaggy. Velma and Freddy both ran toward the monster in hopes of taking it down but when they ran into him they all three went tumbling down the stairs. Shaggy and Scooby ran to see if Velma or Fred where hurt. Fred lifted the 'monster' and asked Velma to pull his mask off. She pulled and pulled but the mask would not come off!

Then it accured to Freddy that it was not a mask! "Shaggy go get some water!" Shaggy came back with a wet rag and wiped off the soot reveiling Cell. "Aha! I knew it! Those two came here to scare the old lady out of her house so they can take her house and money! Mystery solved!"

"What!? What are you talking about," asked Cell who was now very angry and shoved Fred off of him, "I got soot all over my face! The chimney leaked all over me!"

"Look," said Fred pointing at the soot foot prints. "Foot prints! It's a clue!"

Cell rolled his eyes, it was going to be a very long night. For the remainder of the night he had been drug all over the house looking for more clues, why, he had no idea.

……………………1 hour later………

Daphne slipped out of Mirai's room with a big smile on her face and proceeded to bed. She lay down and shut off the light, at last it happened and no thanks to that dumbass Fred. She finally decided that it was over.

Mirai was laying in bed with a big smile on his face as well. 10 years was 9 years too long in his opinion.

………………3 hours later…….

"This is stupid," said Cell, who was tired of looking through records in the basement, "the house is not haunted, there is no mystery to solve, I'm going to bed!"

"But Cell," whined Velma, "we need to solve the mystery!?

"Why," questioned Cell, "why can't the next group of teenagers in a green van solve it!?"

"Well if we don't then who will," asked Fred.

"Someone with a lot of time on there hands, that's who! You are the saddest bunch of miscreants I have ever met! Obviously there is no ghost or we would have seen or heard something from it by now! It's been four fucking hours! You guys can waist your time all you want, I'm going to bed and I'm leaving tomorrow." Cell turned around and stormed out of the room and went to Mirai's room. He shook Mirai away.

"Trunks, we are leaving this crazy place first thing tomorrow!"

"Hey man, Why not stick around till noon and then leave this crazy place. I'm having fun," said Mirai.

"Look, when that Freddy guy finds out you fucked his girl I'm sure friendships and love lives will be ruined, I would rather go right now."

"How did you know I fucked that Daphne chick," asked Mirai narrowing his eyes.

"Um, hello, moaning noises, you want to stay longer, your ki and her ki where in the same room, flirting with each other all through dinner, I may be artificial but I'm not stupid."

"Never assumed you where, my apologies," said Mirai, "now goodnight, lets leave in the afternoon."

"Fine," said Cell, "let's leave in the afternoon but we got to go, we still got six more dragonballs to go and the next one we will have to go clear across the country."

"Yea, okay, whatever," mumbled Mirai already in dreamland.

………..the next morning……..

Mirai turned over to see Daphne sitting there. It startled him, didn't she leave last night? "Hi," she said shyly.

"Um, hi, what's up?"

"I just want you to know that I'm coming with you," she said iwht a big grin.

"Um, you are?"

"Yea, I was only sticking around for Fred and he obviously wouldn't give me any so now I want to go with you. We could be so happy together." Mirai was extremely freaked out by the dreamy look on her face. He put on a fake smile.

"Sure, wait here, I'll let Cell know," he said moving toward the door. Daphne squealed with joy as Mirai ran out the door and down to Cell's room. He shook the monster awake.

"What are you doing it's seven am!"

"Dude, we are getting out of this crazy house!"

"What?"

"Now, man, now, time to start functioning, smell the morning coffe and carnage, let's get out of here."

"Alright, alright, let's go," said Cell moving for the door.

"Not in that direction, the window, or she will see us." Cell didn't even get a chance to ask what was going on, Mirai just jumped out the window and rushed away as fast as he could.

……………………….meanwhile………..

Vegeta trudged through the desert. If Mirai was out here, he had better be dying!

…………..

The next five dragonballs where easier to get a hold of, except for one that included them doing a song and dance from Annie. Anyway, they had all but one, the last one was sitting at the ledge of a hospital that was now falling apart and abandoned. "Just a little closer," said Mirai reaching for it. Cell, who had a hold of his hand, was trying to keep him from falling to the first floor all the way down from the 12th floor. It was proving to be a challenge. He weighed more then he looked, that was for sure. Mirai caught hold of the dragonball and started to fall all those stories. Cell watched in fascination as the young saiyan began to plummet to certain death…or a lot of pain, and he would not use his ki to catch himself. He must not want to be sensed thought Cell. There was a dull thud and Cell took the elevator down to see if his friend was okay.

"You alright there?" Trunks put a thumb up to say he was okay. Cell helped him up and the two walked out of the abandoned hospital. They stood outside and gathered all the dragonballs.

Mirai summoned the dragon. "Yea, what is it," commanded the dragon.

"I want to make a wish," said Mirai.

"Yea, no shit sherlock, ask it already!"

"I wish, to be mortal once again!"

"What,' said Cell, "I thought you wanted to stop me from killing you?"
"Ha! You really think I give a shit about that?"

"Well I don't know."

"Next wish please," said the dragon impatiently.

"Oh right, sorry," said Cell, "I wish for Freeza to be back to life!"

"What!? What the fuck is that!? You steal a wish so you can bring back lizard breath!"

"It's my wish. I did have the work I want have the pay!"

"Whatever, I'll kill him anyway."

"But Trunks, your mortal know," said Cell with a wicked grin.

"AHEM," said Shenron loudly (I think it's the right one). "What is the last wish!"

"Oh," said Mirai.

"We didn't plan on a third wish," said Cell awkwardly.

"Well, what should we wish for,' asked Mirai.

"I don't know, like something that we would actually use," suggested Cell.

"Let's get passes to Coney Island," suggested Mirai.
"Well would we actually go though? We might tlak about going but will we actually?"

"How about a puppy."

"But then you have to feed it and take care of it and love it. No, let's ask for a fish."

"A fish? Well fish aren't that interesting," said Mirai.

"Well let's ask for some Doritos then," said Cell.

"Yea, that sounds good," said Mirai, "we wouldn't have to pay for it so..yea, Doritos."

"We want a bag of Doritos," said Cell. A large whole then opened in the earth and Freeza slowly inched out of it alive and well. Mirai felt his body come back alive. He head a heart beat once again! He felt the warmth of natural blood run in his empty veins, and saw the color return to his skin, he was Trunks again!

……..5 minutes later….

"These are some great Doritos," said Freeza taking another chip as they sat around the outside of the hospital eating.

"Yea," said Trunks, "this was a great wish."

"Man, nacho cheese, the best kind," said Cell nodding his head.

……………….Meanwhile!.........

Vegeta trudged up to the broken down hospital. He saw his son. He was running forward to him and Cell. His attention immediately turned to his worse enemy, Freeza, what was he doing back alive!

………………….

"Where did you guys get these Doritos anyway," asked Vegeta after he joined the circle.

"They wished for them," said Freeza shoving more chips in his mouth.

"Aren't these the best damn chips you ever had," asked Cell. Mirai nodded shoving some in his mouth as well.

………………………………

Next episode! Only time will tell!