Chapter 8

I came to the conclusion that it was selfish of me but, hopefully, Elliot would understand. I swallowed and licked my lips, my throat felt dry as the words escaped my mouth.

"Would you be my boyfriend?" I asked. Elliot's eyes widened. Not in shock though, more like happiness, as if he wanted me to say that all of this time. Through all of these years, that he wanted those words to come through my mouth. And instantly I knew how wrong I was to have said them. But when I thought about it, Austin had Kira and I had to accept that he just didn't feel the same way about me and I also had to accept the feelings I had for Elliot. Maybe this would be a good thing?

"Are you sure?" he asked. There was smile on his face that was-I swear-a mile long.

"Yes, Elliot. I'm sure. So this counts as a first date. What would you do right about now?" I asked. His smile if possible, got larger and he stood up, bringing me up with him.

"Well, I would do something fun and romantic." He said. I smiled. He took my hand and brought me to the water. He kicked some water onto bare legs and smiled evilly at me. I smirked back and kicked water at his shirt.

"Oh, it's on." He stated. I laughed and then felt myself being lifted into the air. I screamed for him to let me go but he didn't listen. He brought me out into the ocean until it was waist deep for him and then dove in with me on his shoulder. The feeling of the water was nice.

When we came up for air, we were laughing like little kids, absolutely soaking wet, but not caring at all. As the sun set, I ruffled my hand through his dark, wet hair and watched as is stuck up. I giggled and he just smiled. I watched as the colors of the sun set illuminated his eyes. I found myself moving closer to him. I wrapped my arms around his neck, burring myself into him in a hug. He held me tighter and kissed the top of my head. I sighed and smiled into his chest.

"How would you end it? Our date?" I asked, actually curious. Elliot didn't respond. He just pulled away and looked me in the eyes. I watched as his face and mouth moved closer to mine. My heart race escalated and my emotions started to take over. But before he could actually kiss me, I moved away slightly and smiled at him cockily.

"Nah uh, cheeky boy. You have to wait at least until the second date." I stated. He smiled. Again, he wasn't disappointed, he was happy. We walked back onto the beach. He handed me a sweater that he brought and turned around as I took my soaking wet top off and replaced it with his sweater. It smelt like him. It smelt like burned fire wood, that musky cologne guys wear and something else I couldn't depict.

When we came to my hotel's lobby, we hugged goodnight and he was able to sneak in a small kiss on my cheek, making me smirk and stick my tongue out at him. He stuck his out too and we both shared a laugh before we both departed to where we had to go to.

When I appeared in my room, Austin was on the couch, looking over my lyrics. My songbook was on the coffee table but it seemed untouched, weird. Usually Austin would have been nose deep in it by now. He looked up at me as he heard the door click behind me. He didn't look happy. Actually, he looked right-out pissed off.

"Where the hell were you?" he said, anger seeping in his voices. His harsh words made me shiver. He was never like this. Did something happen?

"I was out, on a date with Elliot." I stated. His eyes flashed something like hurt but the look was gone as fast as it came so it was hard to tell if it was in fact hurt or not. He huffed, said nothing and then went back to the couch. I walked over to my suitcase and dropped my purse on the front desk, along with my phone. I then walked over and sat opposite Austin, sitting beside him was just too hard for me at this point. He looked really upset.

"What's wrong?" I asked. He didn't answer but he did look at the necklace around my neck and what it said. I clasped my hand to it, as if doing that would somehow, let him not see it.

"Did Elliot give you that?" he asked. I realized that there was no emotion in his voice. None at all. Not sadness, hurt, jealousy, or anger.

"Yeah, he did. And this sweater. My top is soaking wet because we went unexpectedly swimming in the ocean." I smiled and giggled a little at the memory. Again, Austin showed no emotion.

"Ok, spill it." I said now getting angry. He sighed and the words he spoke hurt me. Not because of how happy I was to hear them but because of what had happened to Elliot and the feelings he thought I had for him.

"Kira broke up with me. She said that I was lying that we had feelings for each other and grilled me about our trip together." He said. My jaw dropped. My hands shook and I felt tears fall all at the same time.

"Oh, God! Austin I am so sorry." I said my voice weak. Where the fuck were these emotions coming from? He looked up, hearing the weakness in my voice. His eyes widened at the fact that I was crying for him. He tried to move closer but I wouldn't let him. If he touched me I knew what would happen. I would tell him everything and perhaps do something, proving that Kira was right, that I had feelings for Austin and if I just couldn't deal with hearing what his reaction would be. I got up and backed up against a wall, sliding own and putting my head between my knees, trying to breath.

What the hell was going on?! Kira broke up with Austin because she still believed that we had feelings for each other. I tried to avoid my feelings for Austin by fucking with Elliot's heart and feelings. I wasn't really sure I had feelings for Elliot. I knew they were small, but they were there. I was hoping for them to grow but, nooooo Kira had to go and break up with Austin and say things that were true for me but not for him.

"Ally, what's wrong. Please let me talk to you." He said hurt in his voice along with worry. I got up and yelled at him, the words burning my throat as they came out.

"No! You can't help me Austin!" I screamed. He moved back, shocked by my tone and height of my voice.

"Why?" he asked quietly.

"Because, if I talk to you or if you touch me I will say everything!" I yelled. He looked confused.

"What do you mean Ally. What's everything?" he asked. My hands shook and my tears fell faster as I told him everything that was in my heart.

"I love you Austin! Seeing you with Kira burns me like hell, I only bare it because you're my friend and I didn't want to ruin everything. Kira is right, I have feelings for you! I have since the practice date! I tried to stay strong but I don't know what the fuck is wrong with me! I went on that date with Elliot to forget about my feelings for you! I know that's selfish but I didn't know what else to do. I cried in Elliot's arms as I told him everything about you! The reason I won't say anything is because it would hurt too much to hear that you don't feel the same way." I said. I hardly ever took a breath during my rant. When I was finished, I slumped back against the wall and fell, letting the tears finally come, all of the pain, all of the worry, all of the love I felt for him came out. My breathing was uneven and it was that way because it was hard to breathe. I heard his footsteps walk over to me and slump down against the wall beside me. I moved away and told him not to touch me. He held me anways.