Indiscriminate Happenings
Fandom: xxxHoLiC
Characters/Pairing: Yuuko, Doumeki/Watanuki
Prompt:9:9- Never Again
Rating: M
Chapter Genre: Romance/Humour
Summary: The best things in life are those that are forced on your unsuspecting soon-to-be-lover as punishment.
Author's Note: This is dedicated to whoever requested Maid!Watanuki and Butler!Doumeki. Because fanfiction is faintly retarded I can't find the review so I don't know who it was. If you read this, please tell me~!
I

"I have to what?!"

Doumeki paused in the hallway, staring at the door that his fellow servants voice came from. He heard Yuuko's (distinctive) cackle and debated on whether or not he should poke his head in to check out what was happening. Though if Watanuki was involved, it should be good...

He grasped the door handle and turned it, pushing the door open and looking in, a tray balanced on his free hand. The cook that worked for Yuuko stood in the middle of the room, his back facing Doumeki and wads of black and white fabric held in his arms. Even if he couldn't see the pale face he still knew there was a brilliant blush on the others pale cheeks. Yuuko caught sight of him and the smirk on her lips grew wider, her eyes lingering for a mere second, the movement going unnoticed by the preoccupied chef.

"My guests found something wrong with the meal, so this is to be your punishment," their mistress replied, one hands supporting her head, long black hair spilling over the deep crimson material of the chase lounge. Doumeki wondered how any sane person could find a fault in the lanky mans food but he was willing to think that whoever it was merely had a severe case of dementia and let it go.

He pulled back just in time to avoid being seen by Watanuki as the man turned around and stormed out of the room, stomping past Doumeki without noticing him. He caught a fleeting glance of lace, frills and what he thought seemed to be a pair of white... cats ears and a tail. He couldn't be positive though.

He was looking forward to finding out
II

Doumeki had moved on to his duties in the lounge, polishing the numerous silver candle sticks that Yuuko kept around. 'For emergencies,' she said.

He didn't know if he should believe her.

He glanced up at the sound of the door creaking on hinges that were just beginning to need oil and paused at the brightly flushed face of Watanuki, blinking at him.

"Do you need something?" he asked, straightening from his slightly hunched over pose, folding the cloth he was using and setting it on the table. Night had fallen outside and Doumeki vaguely wondered what had taken the slight man so long to change into. The blush grew and he was intrigued, more so than before.

"Y-Yuuko-san s-said she would be in here!" Watanuki cried, eyes sweeping over the room and a huff making its way out when he saw no scantily clad mistress ready and waiting to mock him. Doumeki shrugged, turning to fully face him and striding to the porthole that Watanuki was using to hide himself. "W-what are you doing?!"

"She's probably on her way," Doumeki stated, reaching out to eliminate the barrier between them. "You know how she is."

Thin fingers gripped the wood, preventing the bigger man from opening it fully.

"Well, I'll wait out here until she arrives," Watanuki protested, ducking further back when Doumeki gained some leverage.

"Yuuko won't like it if you aren't waiting in the room," he reasoned, relaxing his grip when the chef froze, breath catching and his lips twisting when he realized there was no flaw to the others logic. Huffing and pouting Watanuki released the door and reluctantly allowed Doumeki to open it.

He would've gaped at the sight if his personality allowed it.

Decked out in a black maids dress that Doumeki was fairly certain was too short to be appropriate for anywhere but the bedroom (though that could have been his hormones speaking), Watanuki self-consciously tugged at the bottom, the curled white tail peaking out from under the skirt, a bell tied on a red string around the tip, an apron over it and white knee high socks with frilly lace lining the tops. Shiny black Mary Jane's were on his feet and the head band he had seen earlier was clutched tightly in Watanuki's hand, between two large white and pink cat ears.

"You should put the ears on," he said nonchalantly, not allowing the strain he was feeling to show through his voice. Watanuki spluttered at him, eyes going wider than usual (he had to admit the shape of hem complimented the over all picture he presented) then narrowing into a poisonous glare.

"You aren't going to say anything other than that?" he demanded, stomping his foot in a petulant show of anger. "At all?!"

"Would you like me to?" Doumeki asked after a moment of contemplation. Before Watanuki's anger could manifest itself further the lights blinked out and the door slammed shut, lock clicking into place, leaving the currently cross-dressing male to shriek and begin to panic, tripping over a bump in the carpet and sending him crashing into Doumeki.

Well, he was never one to let opportunities pass him by(the candles placed there for precisely that reason went unused).
III

Yuuko giggled, an empty sake cup in hand and pressed to the wall, listen to the array of sounds coming from the lounge. Watanuki would be on the hunt after they were finished, but hopefully the workout she had set up would leave him confined to the bed for the next couple of days. And if it didn't, then she could always bust out the gorgeous, blue and silver dress she had received from a Chinese client of hers as payment. It was more than sufficient.

A particularly loud cry from Watanuki had her attention wholly returned to the task at hand. She could think of other plots later; right now she would reap the pleasures of the seeds previously sewn.
IV

The next morning Watanuki stiffly moved about the kitchen, preparing breakfast slower than he usually did, limping from spot to spot with half the finesse of normal days. Doumeki waited patiently at the table, a small, smug smirk adjourning his lips as he watched the product of his hard work the previous night. Yuuko waltzed in, loud and obnoxiously happy, greeting them. Noticing her charges predicament her hand rested against her lips in faux concern.

"Ne, Watanuki, are you all right?" she inquired sweetly, deliberately getting in his way and forcing him to move around her so he could gather the needed ingredients from the other counter. "Did you work yourself too hard last night?"

"Never. Again," he growled, glaring at Doumeki's near-grin and then opting to ignore both parties and continue with his work, chopping the vegetables and fruit with more force than was actually needed.

They both knew he didn't mean it.
V
Because we all know that's actually who Yuuko-san is. :D A yaoi fangirl, just like the CLAMP girls. 3 I torture that poor boy, don't I? Huh, go figure... By the way, if I randomly disappear from this fandom for a bit I've either A) temporarily dropped it for Spain/Romano, B) died and gone to heaven from yaoi overload then came back because I had to finish this, or C) not finished the next prompt. Either way, I'll be mostly euphoric in two of those situations. The third will see me working as hard as I can on it, watching Oliver and Co., or studying for a Math test on Tuesday because I'm already failing and I really need that course. T.T Depressing.