Indiscriminate Happenings
Fandom: xxxHoLiC
Characters/Pairing: Doumeki/Watanuki, Yuuko, Kohane, Maru, Moro, Mokona
Prompt:11:6- Housewife
Rating: T
Chapter Genre: Romance/Humour/Crossdressing
Summary: Requested by ; While the attire Watanuki donned looked wonderful, it may have disturbed Kohane-chan's innocent eyes...
I

"What's wrong with him?" Doumeki asked, eyes fixed intently on the odd sight before him. Beside him Yuuko lounged, a wide, demonic (as Watanuki would have said, had he been in his right mind) smirk painted as closely on her lips as the dark red lipstick.

"Let's say he... imbibed the wrong liquid during lunch today," she murmured, chuckling at her workers antics, watching the 80's style American dress twist around the blue eyed boys knees, his red heels clicking as he cleaned, a wide, content smile on his lips. Doumeki hummed, leaning forward, enraptured by the scene unfolding before them. Mokona giggled, snuggling closer to Yuuko as Maru and Moro sat beside them, their hands clasped and eyes wide as they watched their proclaimed older brother briefly pause to smooth the white apron tied at his waist.

The timer buzzed in the kitchen, signaling that whatever smelt so good was ready. Watanuki spun, the bright red and white polka-dot skirt lifting and twirling as he moved, tight fitting bodice hugging his upper body. The door slid open just as Watanuki completely left the room, revealing Kohane with a wrapped package cradled in her arms.

"Kohane-chan," Yuuko greeted slyly, her grin implying she had known about the girls imminent arrival.

Doumeki was too busy staring at the doorway Watanuki had departed through to properly greet her.

"Yuuko-san." Jaded hazel eyes moved from the Dimension Witch to the stoic Exorcist. "Shizuka-kun, is something wrong?"

Doumeki grunted, half paying attention and half too intent on seeing the Seer again. Yuuko snickered, hiding her mouth in the expansive lengths of fabric that made up the sleeves of her kimono. Maru and Moro echoed her laughter, leaning into each other with a conspiratorial air about them.

"Doumeki-kun is a little bit distracted Kohane-chan," Yuuko explained, motioning the girl to come sit with them. "Watanuki will be out in a moment with dinner. Will you be joining us?"

"If I'm not imposing," Kohane said politely, bowing shallowly and waiting for Yuuko's affirmative nod before taking a seat next to Doumeki, whose only move had been to lean forward in response to the muffled sounds outside the door.

Yuuko had never seen such an expression of surprise on the girls face. Nor had she ever before had such trouble repressing her laughter.

"Kohane-chan!" Watanuki greeted happily, placing the tray of food gently on the table top, and kneeling in an oddly feminine manner that Kohane had seen before in him, smoothing the skirt of his dress down over his rear and sitting back on his heels. "I wasn't aware that you would be joining us. How are you?"

"Ah... Fine, Kimihiro-kun," she answered hesitantly, not knowing if this was an elaborate prank they had set up (she immediately discarded that idea; Kimihiro would never go along with something like that with such a chipper smile on his lips), or if something had genuinely happened to make him think he was a housewife stuck in a movie where he was stuck living in the past. "I'm sorry to stop in so abruptly, but obaa-chan had a package for Yuuko-san."

"No worries," Watanuki stated, standing from his crouch and retreating back into the kitchen. "There are only a couple more things to bring out."

"Would you like some help?" Kohane called, trailing him even before he answered positively. Giving up on the struggle not to laugh Yuuko nearly tipped off the chaise lounge from the force, her body shaking. Maru and Moro stood, spinning in wide circles, their hands linked and their voices raised in giddy chants. Doumeki stayed stationary, rooted to his spot as he once again waited for the smaller teenagers return, the images of the red and white dress and the crimson ribbon tied around the pale neck.

Watanuki was even wearing thick white earrings.
II

After a fairly... uneventful meal (considering the usual hassle and commotion), Watanuki finished the remaining cleaning that had to be done around the shop, then was escorted home by Doumeki, who took great (silent) pleasure in staring at the smaller boy the entire walk after dropping Kohane-chan off at the old fortune tellers house. When they arrived at the dark, currently vacant apartment (the couple Watanuki shared it with were away with family that week, thankfully; the poor boy would be mortified if he knew the people who had essentially raised him since his parents death had seen him in such a state) the Seer unlocked his door then fiddled with his keys, blue eyes focused on the ground.

"Doumeki," he murmured, heel clicking against the cold concrete, "I need you to check a few wards inside. Could you do that? I'll make you a snack to take home afterwards."

Doumeki scrutinized Watanuki for a moment, taking in the shy, hesitant invitation, and slowly nodded, trying to decide whether or not it was Watanuki or whatever he had drank that extended it. Finally, when the smaller teens fidgeting got worse and he began to worry his bottom lip, Doumeki nodded his consent and followed the inexplicably nervous boy inside his residence.

They ended up falling asleep, draped over each other on the floor.
III

Watanuki groaned, his mouth dry and lips chapped, skin peeling and flesh throbbing. His head pounded and he vaguely wondered if he had drank copious amounts of alcoholic beverages the night before. Turning over, dully noting that his legs and thighs were chilled, he came face to face with a blank-faced, sleeping Doumeki. A small shriek escaped, causing the archer to twitch and shift closer. Watanuki's hands flew up to his mouth, covering his lips, trying not to make anymore noise.

He felt the cool plastic earrings bump against his neck.

Gaping in horror he moved his hand from his lower face along his jaw, finger tips seeking out the offending material. His other hand moved down along his body, head snapping down to stare in repugnance at the dress that clothed his body. The skirt was hitched up to mid-thigh, showing off pale legs, one hitched over Doumeki's hip and the other bent at the knee between Doumeki's. Watanuki flushed as bright as his dress, trying desperately to inch back and shove the fabric down to cover more skin.

He didn't notice Doumeki's eyes siding open and looking at him until...

"Oi."

Watanuki yelped, jerking his body back and only succeeding at bringing Doumeki with him. "God dammit Doumeki, don't do that!"

"I didn't know you wore black underwear," Doumeki stated, glancing down at Watanuki's hips and keeping his eyes locked there. Watanuki sputtered, unable to say anything productive or coherent.

"You pervert!" he yelped, shoving the skirt down with one hand and pushing at the solid chest with the other. "You don't go around doing things like that without peoples permission first you idiot!"

"So," Doumeki began after a second of consideration for the smaller boys words, "what you're saying is that I can look if you say I can?"

Watanuki's mouth opened and closed, no words coming for a moment, absolutely stunned by the archers proclamation. "Wha-? Are you really so socially retarded?!"

All protests were cut off, quite happily, but Doumeki, who grabbed the smaller boy and pulled him close, sliding a rough, calloused hand up the smooth thigh, claret fabric bunching and gather. Watanuki's struggles tapered off and quieted completely after a tense moment, body relaxing enough to wrap his legs around Doumeki's hips and his arms around the tanned neck.

All in all, while Doumeki fully supported a cross dressing Watanuki, he much preferred the violent, foul-tempered boy. And if Watanuki decided to don such attire again, willingly, then Doumeki would embrace that time with open arms.

Until then, making out on the apartment floor was more than sufficient.
IV
There you be~! I hope you enjoyed it . ^^ I did. Lol, oh if Haruka could see him now... Hm, I still think that, Haruka being a spirit and all, he would be attracted to Watanuki in some way or another, seeing as everyone else is. :D T.T I'm still si-i-i-ick! XP