A/N: Hello, you all have flyfloyd to thank for this update. I was asked to update, and I thought 'Why the hell not?' and did so. And in this chapter, we enter the main character: the cherry lollipop. Oh, I might as well tell you about the writing style I'm using in this story. I just read some of the American classics by John Steinbeck, and though I thought they were utter crap, I decided to copy him a little. I tried writing in an American sort of style, using the lingo of our time and trying to sort of capture the basic elements of American culture. Too bad I'm not American. XD Enjoy!
Deidara almost walked through the doors to the building. Almost. He missed by a centimeter. Grumbling profanities and rubbing his forehead, he entered the building correctly. Kakuzu looked up.
"What's up with you?" he asked.
"I'm supposed to go a day without my stupid scope, and I've been walking into doors all day, un!" Deidara walked to his cubicle and managed to sit down in his seat. Kakuzu followed him, staring at his newly exposed face. A scar stretched diagonally across his eye, from his nose to his cheek, and another one curved down his temple. The skin was pale, deathly so, but most surprising was the iris of his eye- completely blood red. Deidara swiveled around in his chair, smiling slightly at Kakuzu. "Can I help you with something, un?" Kakuzu shook his head, stepping into the small cubicle.
"No, but Sarah can." Deidara grinned.
"Sure, un. What can I help you with, un?"
"Now mind you, this is a personal and confidential topic, and I am putting my trust in your hands."
"Yeah yeah, I read the contract, un," Deidara said. "What's up, un?"
"It's sort of confusing."
"I'm listening, un."
"Well, old feelings have sort of arisen. I'm not quite sure why. I haven't been really romantically active in a long time, and suddenly it seems like I want someone. The only reason I can think of is that old feelings have arisen for Sasori."
"I see. Tell me exactly what you see in him, un."
"I don't know."
"I see, un."
"You're creeping me out, brat."
"Oh? Sorry, un. You don't know what you see in him, so what makes you so sure these feelings are for Sasori, un?"
"He's the only person I've ever really had these feelings for."
"Why can't it be someone else, un?"
"Because these feelings don't happen overnight. It just doesn't work that way."
"Who says, un?"
"I say."
"So who was asking for help, un?" Deidara sighed. "You need to learn to change, un. I'm not saying you're not all right as you are, but sometimes we get the signals that we want something out of our norm, un."
"I lost you."
"Something somewhere in your brain is telling you exactly what you want, un. But you, Kakuzu, are trying to rationalize this want, un. But don't, because no one ever said this was rational, un." Kakuzu blinked. Deidara sighed. "OK, I'll give you a little story, un. One night, I woke up craving cherry lollies , un. I used to have them in elementary school, but I always like the orange ones, un. So I got out of bed and tried to quell this craving, un. But since I had never bought any, and since I never really liked the cherry ones, I decided I must want something else, un. But try as I might, nothing struck my interest, un. See? By trying to figure out why, I denied myself exactly what I needed, un." Deidara leaned back in his chair, hoping he had made an impression. "You follow, un?"
"Sort of." How was it that kid could just spurt of exactly how he felt? "So, suppose these old- or new- feelings aren't for Sasori. Who are they for?"
"Only you can know that, Kakuzu, un. It may not be rational, but it sure as hell is going to be right, un."
"Are you, by any chance, speaking from experience?" Deidara laughed.
"You're funny, Kakuzu. No, I'm not speaking from experience. Luckily that's not what an advice column takes, un. If I gave advice on my experiences, I'd just tell everyone to fuck everyone, un." Kakuzu sighed. "Just get out of your comfort zone and see what happens, un. You never know, you might have fun, un."
"You don't have a comfort zone, do you? You don't have boundaries or shame or anything, do you?" Deidara laughed, swiveling in his chair.
"Well, I don't know, un," he said. "I'm still trying to get all that sorted out, un. But might as well push the limits to find where they break, right, un?"
"But you don't know about being awkward or embarrassed, do you?" Deidara looked at Kakuzu seriously.
"Shame has its good sides, un," he said slowly. "But it has a lot of baggage, un. Then it also gets coupled with a fear of rejection, and that's just something I can live without, un. But believe me, I've only found that out through experience, un." Deidara grinned, and it seemed the serious spell was broken. "Maybe if you understood a little more why you have your boundaries, you'll be able to take more risks, un." Deidara swiveled in his chair. "Did Sarah help you, un?"
"She gave me a lot to think about," Kakuzu replied. "Thank her for me, will you?"
"Will do, un. You know…" Deidara paused, grabbing Kakuzu's attention. "Hidan's completely free, un." Kakuzu just stared at Deidara. "Would you mind grabbing me a coffee, I'm a bit scared I'll kill myself trying to, un."
"Tobi, un!" Deidara called. Tobi came scampering into the blonde's cubicle.
"Yes, Sempai?"
"Take this to Itachi, I don't think I can make it, un," Deidara ordered.
"Right away, Sempai!" Tobi cried, taking the sheet and running off. Deidara smirked at how he could get the newest employee running around. He glanced at his watch and sighed. He didn't want to go home just yet. Standing up, he stretched and walked across the hall to Sasori's office.
"Hey, un," he said, leaning on the wall. Sasori turned around, giving a rare smile.
"Can I help you?"
"Want to grab a bite to eat after you get off, un?"
"Sounds nice. I get off in fifteen minutes."
"Good, un. Meet you at the door then, un?"
"Sure." Deidara walked back to his cubicle and picked up his jacket and bag and heading out. Sasori closed his computer and stood up, collecting his things and went to find Kakuzu in the darkroom. "I'm going out with Deidara, go on home without me. I'll catch a train or something." Kakuzu looked up.
"All right. Here, what do you think of this for your article on art?" Kakuzu asked, gesturing at the picture hanging up. Sasori studied it.
"Seems nice. See you later."
"Bye." Sasori left the dark room and found Deidara waiting by the door.
"Shall we?" Deidara smiled, following Sasori outside.
"It's a beautiful day, un," he said, twirling as he stared up at the sky.
"The weather channel said it might rain," Sasori pointed out. Deidara frowned.
"Darn. I hate rain, un."
"Oh? I find it rather calming."
"Ever had to live in it, un?"
"No, have you?"
"On occasion, un. But I have to walk to the train station to get home, un," Deidara replied. "Oh well, I'll just have to live with it, un."
"Did you have anywhere in particular you wanted to go?" Sasori asked, changing the subject.
"There's a little sandwich place that's real cheap, un. Wanna go there, yeah?"
"Sounds good." Deidara grinned, leading the way down the street.
"You just moved from Japan, right?"
"Yes."
"That's so cool, un. I totally love Japanese culture, un."
"I'm not actually Japanese. I was raised here in California, but moved to Japan to study literature. That's where I met Kakuzu, and then we came out here."
"Wow, your parents must be rich, un!"
"They're dead."
"I'm sorry to hear that, un."
"Don't be. They died when I was two and I was raised by my grandmother."
"That's nice you had someone, un," Deidara said. "And it's still sad, no matter when it happened, un."
"Thank you." Deidara grinned.
"Hey, no prob, un," he replied. "There it is, right up there, un."
"How about you? Where are your parents?" Sasori asked. Deidara shrugged.
"Was it interesting in Japan, un?" he asked, changing the subject.
"Since I went there to study literature, I guess it was," Sasori replied. They walked into the little café. It truly was a cheap place, but Sasori didn't mind. He usually had expensive taste, but being here with Deidara made it all worthwhile. Hold it- where the hell had that come from? Sasori shook his head. Soon they had ordered and were sitting at a table for two by the window.
"This is nice, un," Deidara said. "We should do this more often, un."
"Yes, I think we should," Sasori said.
"So, do you like art, un?"
"Oh yes. I grew up on art, my grandmother always took me to art museums."
"That's sweet, un," Deidara said, smiling. "I don't like the old art, you know, like old paintings and stuff, un. I like modern stuff, like sculptures, un."
"I see," Sasori said. "I find I prefer the old works."
They talked for a long time, slowly growing closer over the table. Eventually, Sasori had leaned so close their mouths were almost touching. He looked desperately into Deidara's eyes, then softly pressed their lips together. Deidara didn't pull away, but after a moment Sasori's brain snapped back to reality and he pushed away.
"I'm sorry," he mumbled, though his body was telling him to do it again. Deidara grinned.
"Don't be, I liked it, un," he said. Sasori blinked.
"How old are you?"
"I'm a legal adult, that's all you need to know, un."
"Deidara, I'm dead serious. I'm thirty-five. How old are you?"
"Nineteen, un," Deidara mumbled. Sasori sat back.
"Good God. Deidara, do you realize I've been out of high school for almost as many years you've been alive?" Sasori stood up angrily. "To think I've been shamelessly flirting with you. You're still a teenager, I'm headed towards forty!" Deidara stared at him. Sasori stood there, glaring angrily down at Deidara. Deidara looked meekly up at him.
"Will you sleep with me, un?"
"Yes- NO!" Sasori was getting nervous. His mouth had answered before he could stop it. Scared, he took a step backwards. "Don't touch me, please. I- I need to go." And with that, Sasori threw a ten dollar bill on the table and ran out. Deidara stared after him. Sighing, he leaned back in his chair.
"You're back?" Kakuzu asked, looking up from the papers he was reading. Sasori threw himself on the couch, face pressed into Kakuzu's lap. "Hmm, what's all this about?" Kakuzu asked, laying a hand on Sasori's back.
"I kissed Deidara."
"Oh? You mean he didn't jump you first?"
"God, Kakuzu, I'm no better than a pedophile. Do you know how old he is?"
"How?"
"Nineteen. God, two years ago I would've gone to jail."
"But this isn't two years ago."
"Kakuzu, are you fucking kidding me? This is just barely legal! I'm almost twice his age!"
"And?"
"And? You're kidding!" Sasori got up and glared at Kakuzu. Kakuzu blinked, then smirked.
"Here, sit next to me. I haven't ever seen you this mad. Why are you mad?"
"Because I-" Sasori faltered. He sat down next to his friend. "I'm mad because I liked it. I feel like a lecherous old man."
"You're not. Thirty-five isn't so bad. And nineteen is almost twenty."
"Who took the stick out of your ass?" Kakuzu wrinkled his nose.
"I'll pretend I didn't hear that. Here, I'm going to give you some advice someone once gave me. Sometimes our bodies tell us things that aren't rational or comfortable, like craving a cherry lollipop or something, but it's what we want. We can't think about it logically or sensibly, but we can't deny ourselves what we want. Maybe it doesn't make sense, but when it works out, it doesn't have to." Sasori was silent for a long moment. Then he sighed.
"I'm mad because it should feel wrong. I'm mad because it did feel right. Shouldn't it feel wrong, like a guilty pleasure?" Kakuzu shrugged.
"I don't know. But how you feel is how you feel, and you can't ignore that."
That night Sasori lay awake, staring at the ceiling. He had so much to think about. And after the entire night, he still had not made a decision.
Sasori walked into the office the next morning and rushed to his cubicle, not wanting to see Deidara. There, he found his bag he had left at the café and a note on his desk. He sat down and picked it up, finding a red lollipop with it. In a scrawled handwriting, Sasori read the following:
Dear Sasori,
Sorry about our little encounter yesterday. I should've listened when they told me not to mess around with coworkers, neh? No hard feelings, I hope we're still friends.
-Deidara.
Sasori stared at the note and the candy for a minute, before it all clicked. He got up and walked to Deidara's cubicle. "Deidara," he said. Deidara turned around and his face fell, before he brightened.
"Hey Sasori," he said, looking away slightly in shame.
"Deidara, I'm the one who should be apologising. I ran out, and was a complete ass." Deidara blinked, slightly confused.
"Good then, we've both said sorry, so are we even, un?" Sasori leaned against the doorway.
"I'm willing to give you a shot," he said. "I'm willing to start up some sort of relationship. But mind you, this is a mature thing with alarm clocks and conversations and… um…"
"Hmm?"
"No sex." Deidara blinked and shrugged.
"No problem. I can live without sex."
"At least, for a little while, until we get to know each other," Sasori added, flattered Deidara would so blithely give up sex for him. Deidara did one revolution in his chair, smiling to himself.
"Want to have dinner tonight, un?" he asked.
"Sounds good. Your place or eating out?"
"I guess my place, but I have to warn you it's not pretty, un."
"I don't really care."
"Good! Is six good, un?"
"Sounds good." Sasori smiled, and Deidara stood up, standing in front of his new lover. Delicately, he wrapped his arms around Sasori's neck, pressing his face to the redhead's chest.
"You're too tall, un," Deidara mumbled. Sasori laughed, patting Deidara's head.
"Aw, that's a first for me," he said. Deidara was the shortest in Akatsuki, Itachi having only a centimeter on him. Then came Sasori, then Hidan, then Konan, then Zetsu, and finally, Tobi, Kakuzu, and Kisame all tied for tallest, depending on who was slouching and who was jumping up and down.
"Too bad. Go shrink, un." Sasori laughed and lifted Deidara's head, pecking him affectionately on the lips.
"I've got to get back to work. I'll see you at six?"
"Yup, un," Deidara turned and sat back down, opening another e-mail.
Dear Sarah,
My life has fallen into a sort of lethargic pattern. I'm in a rut, and I don't know how to spice up my life or my marriage. Please help.
-Lost and Languid
Deidara smiled.
Dear Lost and Languid,
Make yourself a new person! Bring home flowers, surprise your significant other with movie tickets. Stay up all night talking and eating takeout, go dancing, hang out with friends! Take up a sport or instrument, try your hand at writing! Fall in love with everyday, and appreciated the unique beauty in life. No one's watching, you might as well have some fun. You only get one life, but luckily, you're never too young or old to really start living.
-Sarah.