Thanks for the lovely response to the last ch. We heard you loud and clear – you're happy they are back in NYC!
None of them are ours…but man, wouldn't it be nice?
Chapter 23 The Great American Pastime
Take Me Out - E
Bella woke up in the mood for French toast, and I was flipping them over while she pulled syrup and butter from the refrigerator.
"So, I'm just wondering. Is life ever going to be boring with you?"
"I know you won't believe it, but before you, I was living a perfectly banal existence. Maybe it's not I who brings the chaos." It wasn't a lie. In the months I'd been back in New York before meeting Bella, I really had a work, home, sleep routine.
"Chaos, huh?" she said bumping into me purposely. "So what do you want to do today? I guess we have no plans, since we weren't supposed to be back yet. I should work, but I don't want to deal with it yet."
"Hmm, I definitely don't want to think about work yet either." I stacked the French toast on a plate. "I should probably give my Dad a call. I'm not sure when we'll get together, but I doubt it'll do any good to wait."
Bella opened the drawer next to me to grab silverware.
"Did your mom saying anything about him not being there yesterday?"
"No, but I wouldn't have expected him to be there. It wouldn't have felt right anyway." I believed that, but I couldn't help wonder what it would have been like if he had shown up. I watched her nod out of the corner of my eye. I turned around and handed her a plate.
"These look fabulous. Thanks for humoring me this morning."
I smiled at her. "My pleasure, and as for today, is there anything in particular that interests you?"
"Not sure. I've enjoyed not being cooped up, so more outside time would be good."
During breakfast, I gathered my thoughts and built my strength not enthusiastic about my morning task. After we'd cleaned up the dishes, I went out on the terrace to call my dad. I wouldn't have minded Bella listening, but I didn't want to make her uncomfortable.
Ten minutes passed before I could make the call. I was calculating my approach. I was still angry with him, and I felt justified in that emotion, but Emmett and my mom had given me a lot to think about. And honestly, what happened with Bella and her dad impacted me. I didn't want to run from mine anymore. Life passes by so quickly, and I was afraid that someday it would be too late to reconcile with him.
But whenever I spoke with him, my emotions seemed to get the best of me, so at least for this phone call, my goal was to treat it as business. I was calling to set up a meeting. No emotions. Not my father. Just a meeting.
After I'd hit his number, I realized I hadn't planned a message if he didn't respond, which sent me into a moment of panic, but he picked up on the third ring.
"Hello." I couldn't read any emotion in his tone. He must have known it was me when he picked up, but he was giving nothing away.
"Hi, Dad." It came out easier than it should have, like it was something I said every day.
"What can I do for you, Edward?" Business as usual.
"I'm calling about the message you left before Bella and I went to Washington. Would it be possible to meet this week?" There was silence on the other end, and I heard the clicking of a keyboard.
"I'm available Tuesday night. Would that work?"
I was caught off guard. He was already setting the terms. I almost declined just to make him work a little harder for it, but I was willing to make some effort here.
"That would be fine."
"I will have my assistant contact Jane with details."
"Thank you." It felt final, but neither of us made the first move to hang up.
"Edward?"
"Yeah?"
"Thank you for calling. I've been waiting for it."
"I'll see you soon, Dad."
I exhaled very loudly at the end. It shouldn't be that hard to get through a phone call with your father.
I looked out over the park, trying to put myself in a better place before going into make plans with Bella. It was shaping up to a perfect spring day. I thought about just taking another walk in the park. It had been such a peaceful experience the last time. The park had become one of my favorite places lately. I couldn't think of it without picturing Bella with that baseball cap pulled low telling me she loved me for the first time.
Of course, that typically brought up everything that happened after.
I teetered on the emotions of those memories—from the joy of love, both falling in and making it to the embarrassment of having the privacy of it stolen out from under us. Back and forth. Up and down.
But it brought us here. And here was good. We had balance here.
It also helped me decide what we would do that day.
A couple of hours later, we sported our matching Yankees hats as we headed to the stadium.
"So do you think we'll get a home run today?" Bella asked with just a hint of suggestion after I picked up the tickets from the Will Call window.
I raised an eyebrow at her.
"What, I was just asking about the game." She feigned indignation.
We bought a program, hot dogs, and beer. It didn't get any better than that.
"Did I tell you I've never been to a major league game before?"
"No, are you serious?"
"It was too far to Seattle really, and I guess it just wasn't a priority since I've been here. Do you come often?"
"Not lately. But I catch a few games a year. "
"Did I see Emmett with a Mets cap?"
"Oh don't get me started. We could go to blows over that one. Dad always had to take us to equal numbers of each growing up. And I would scowl through the Mets games, while he would cheer for whomever the Yankees were playing. When we got older, there was always a wager."
"Huh, I like that. What do you want to bet today, Cullen?"
I don't know where it came from. It was the most off the wall bet I'd ever issued, and after I said it I thought Bella was going to turn around and walk out of the stadium.
"How about if the Yankees win, you move in with me."
First Pitch - B
He was screwing with me. Fine. Two can play at that game.
"Who are the Yankees playing?" I asked with a straight face.
"The Cleveland Indians. It should be a good game. Pitchers battle between the '07 and '08 Cy Young winners. We signed our guy from the Indians in free agency, and this will be the first time he faces his old team."
I followed Edward down the aisle towards first base. My brain was frantically working, trying to come up with something. I kept expecting him to stop, but he continued on until we were at the first row.
"Here we go. Seats 7 and 8 are ours."
"Banal existence, Cullen? We are in the first row at a Yankees game."
He just smiled and pointed toward the field. "Yep, notice the cameras are all focused over there? Totally banal."
"Smart ass."
But he gave me the perfect idea.
"Okay, fine. I'll take your bet. Which means that I have to root for the Indians, right? But it's a one sided wager. So if the Indians win, you have to move in with me."
Edward whipped around. "What?"
"You heard me." I looked at him with a straight face. "You can't be the only one to throw the gauntlet."
He studied me for a minute before breaking into a grin.
"I wasn't throwing down the gauntlet, Bella. I was serious. Yankees win, you move in." He tried valiantly to hide it, but I could see the glimmer of a hopeful little boy lurking just beneath the surface.
"You are bound and determined to kill every single non-spontaneous cell in my body, aren't you?" I teased him, trying to buy a few minutes to think.
I felt like my heart was going to burst out of my chest. He wanted me to move in with him. It wasn't a joke. He was serious. I should be panicking. I should be running to call Alice to ask what I should do.
Instead, I was tempted to call my landlord and see if I could get out of my lease. What the hell?
"Well?" Edward looked amused. He could see me scrambling, trying to compose my thoughts.
"Fine. I'll take your bet. If the Yankees win, I'll move in. If the Indians win, I stay put. But moving in is contingent on me getting a part of the office. Your precious first editions will have to co-mingle with my lowly paperbacks."
His smile never faded. "Is that my only concession?"
"I have 9 innings to amend the terms. You don't like 'em, you have right of first refusal."
He was fighting hard, but the smile was slowly turning into a full on grin.
"Deal."
I turned to look at the field, pretending to take everything in.
Holy shit. Had I really just done that?
"Bella?"
I looked up to see Tyler Crowley coming out of the dug out in a warm up jacket.
"Oh, Hi Tyler, how are you?"
"Okay, arm is giving me a bit of trouble, so I'm not playing today." His eyes darted past me to Edward.
"I'm sorry! Tyler Crowley, Edward Cullen."
Tyler smiled and nodded at him. "You've got a hell of a girl there, Edward. Hope Giana didn't give you too much grief last week."
He shifted his eyes back to the field. "I have to head out. You guys enjoy the game."
With that, he jogged away.
"What was that all about?" Edward asked, a note of concern in his voice as his arm tightened around my shoulders.
Oh what a difference a week makes. In eight days, we had faced down his family, gone back to where it all started, faced my own family drama on the other side of the country, and came home with the realization that fate might have brought us together, but how we made it work was entirely up to us.
So I decided to be absolutely honest. No sheltering, no protecting. It was instinct to do so, but I knew where that got me.
"You are cute when you're jealous. Tyler was Giana's date at the Met weekend. He and I exchanged introductions and spoke for a few minutes. He actually gave me a little boost of confidence to get through that night."
"I'm not sure I like how that sounds. It was bad enough watching him put the moves on you at the Met, I don't want to actually hear about it too."
"Stop it. You already have green eyes, I don't need to add monster to the end of that statement." I punched him in the arm. "He told me that Giana didn't stand a chance with the way you looked at me. He didn't try a thing. From the comments he made, I think he's hung up on someone else."
Edward laughed and shook his head. "Life is full of surprises, isn't it? Or is it that you bring out the best in everyone?"
"Nah, I just like to think that everyone has the potential for good in them somewhere." I took a sip of my beer and looked out onto the field. "If this week has taught me one thing, it's that if you dig below the surface, people's intentions might be a bit nobler than we thought."
"Would that be a reference to my family or yours?"
"Both."
The announcer broke in, asking everyone to stand for the national anthem, effectively ending the conversation. Once the song was over, I settled back into my seat and smiled as the umpire shouted 'play ball.'
Go Yankees.
Third Inning - E
I wondered why I wasn't panicking. I had just put out a call to up the ante on our commitment to each other. I had a few women in the past suggest they move in with me, and I'd nearly had a heart attack. But my pulse hadn't increased a bit. I was calm.
And I was sure as hell rooting for the home team.
The first couple of innings went by fairly quickly. No one scored, but we continued casual teasing of each other and the players. Bella was certainly the lone spectator cheering for visitors that day. She got a few looks from the people around us when she clapped at Yankee outs. It was early though, and I wondered if she'd face belligerence once the fans had a few more beers in them.
"So, as a kid you and Emmett would come to the games with your dad?"
"Sure."
"Did you all attract a lot of attention back then?"
"No, not really. The whole concept of paparazzi really didn't exist at the same level. There were gossip columns, so there might have been a mention of it somewhere, but just as a line, you know? My parents kept to themselves for the most part. And types of the events they attended were pretty high society. It was different for Emmett and me. What teenager doesn't want to go to a movie premiere or a major sporting event? It sort of opened up the whole 'celebrity' can of worms."
"What was your dad like then?"
"What do you mean?"
"Well, I just have a hard time seeing him at a game like this."
"I guess you do have a very limited perspective on him. He taught me how score. He saw it as an important mathematics lesson. In the beginning, Emmett and I sat on either side of him, so he could show us how it all worked, but after a few times, Emmett lost interest. He just liked the game. He didn't need to analyze it."
"That was fun for you? Learning statistics was entertainment? You really are warped, Cullen."
I shrugged and laughed. "It wasn't quite that clinical. We ate junk food, and my dad gave us tips on how to get player autographs."
"Did he laugh then?"
"He still does."
"I haven't seen that."
"I seem to bring out the worst in him." I felt bad, in a way, for skewing Bella's perception of my father. Carlisle was typically a warm man, not the life of the party, not the one to tell jokes. But someone you could trust. Infinitely knowledgeable as if he'd been privy to secrets no one else had—like he'd been around longer, seen more. And it was absolutely true. This cold, hard side to him only seemed to manifest itself in my presence.
"I'm sorry I brought up bad memories."
"You didn't. Those are all very good ones, actually."
She took my hand and laced her fingers with mine. The damn Yankees had better score soon.
Fourth Inning - B
"Hey batta batta…saawinnnggg batta," I chanted.
Edward shook his head trying not to laugh.
"Come on, I am at a baseball game, I can't not do that!"
A crack of the bat made us both jump. Foul ball.
Three innings and no score. Who would have thought I would be this invested in a baseball game?
"You do realize that I learned more than just statistics at baseball games. I learned money management too."
I looked over at Edward like he had two heads.
"Money management? Living large there, buddy!"
"I'll show you. You have any singles?"
I dug money out of my pocket.
"Okay, so this is called dirty ball. You pay a dollar in each inning. At the end of the three out cycle, you are hoping that the player holding the ball tosses it back up on the pitcher's mound. If the ball stays in the dirt, whoever is holding the money gets to keep the pot. If it doesn't stay in the dirt, then you add a dollar in and pass it on to the next person."
"That's not money management, that's gambling."
He grinned at me. "Semantics."
"Fine. Here's my buck." I handed Edward the dollar.
Another crack of the bat. A ground ball up the middle. The second baseman easily fielded it and threw it to first.
End of the fourth. No score.
"Oh come on, throw the ball you bum!" Edward shouted. But the second baseman ran into the dugout, tossing the ball to the umpire as he ran by.
"I hate when they do that," he mumbled. He added a dollar and handed the money back to me.
"Doesn't look like your team wants to cooperate with you today." I put a dollar on the stack and leaned back against my seat.
"Oh they'll come through. And maybe your team will keep the cycle going for a few innings so that you'll have enough money to get copies of the apartment key made."
"Don't get too confident there, Cullen. There are still three innings to go."
"Haven't you figured out, I'm always confident? You will need a key."
"We'll see, that Donnie Darko guy is up to bat next. Isn't he supposed to be their homerun guy?"
Edward laughed as he reached for his beer. "Ryan Garko, not Donnie Darko. And he runs like Fred Flintstone. The only way he's scoring is if he knocks one out of the park."
He leaned back, draping an arm around the back of my seat, smiling.
I knew that smile.
"You know, Bella, you're the one that made the smart Alec comment about hitting a homerun today. I think I just might."
Oh Edward, if you only knew.
Top of the Eighth - E
Damned Cleveland. Why do they even have to have a baseball team? Damned Donnie Darko.
Bella was the only person anywhere near us on her feet cheering when the guy rounded home plate.
"What was that you were saying about a home run, Edward? It's getting late in the game. I'm guessing that's the last one you'll see today."
I threw a peanut at her.
So now here we were at the top of the 8th with only one run on the scoreboard, and it was clearly on the wrong side.
"I'm going to hit the bathroom. Do you need anything while I'm out?" I asked Bella.
"Nah, I'm good. Want me to come along?"
"I think I can manage, but you're welcome to assist if you want."
She threw a peanut back at me.
I was laughing as I made my way. I decided to surprise Bella with some cotton candy, and while I waited in line I heard a conversation between two women whispering loudly.
Is that Edward Cullen?
Oh my god, it is. He's so hot.
Could you imagine having that much money?
Have you seen that girl he's with?
He's so out of her league.
I don't know. I think she's kind of cute. Have you seen those boots?
Yeah, three women I work with bought wellies last week.
Um, I just ordered a pair online. Mine will have polkadots.
When I got back to Bella, she was studying the program. "So, I've been thinking. Maybe we should go for Ohio instead of Iowa."
"And why is that?
"There are some real hotties on this team. Check out this Grady Sizemore."
"You just like sweaty guys in tight pants."
"It doesn't suck."
"Speaking of things that don't suck. Did you know you are a trendsetter now?"
"Huh?
"I just heard you've inspired the sale of rain boots."
"Hey if you make fun of the boots, I won't break them out again."
"I'm not joking. I just heard a couple of women talking."
"Really? God people are sheep aren't they?" She took a wad of cotton candy and was letting it melt in her mouth.
I leaned in close. "If I joined the CI baseball team this year would you watch me run around the bases in tight pants?"
Bottom of the Eighth - B
I was cool through the tight baseball pant jokes. But when he started speculating on jersey colors, I thought I was going to combust.
Wouldn't it figure that the CI logo was blue and grey.
Grey.
Shit. I am toast.
Another crack of the bat made us jump. Before I could say anything, Edward pushed me back into my seat. A foul ball came whizzing by my head.
"You might want to rethink your alliances. Sizemore just tried to take you out," he teased. I could tell he was a bit ruffled.
"You sure he was aiming for me? Maybe he got jealous."
The words had hardly left my mouth and Edward had pulled my baseball hat off to kiss me. His hand was in my hair, and the kiss was hard, commanding. I couldn't resist, I moaned into his mouth a bit. He knew exactly how to get to me.
"Good. Let him be. He can't have you," he whispered hoarsely.
So freaking toast. This game needed to be over, soon, for a number of reasons. How had baseball become such a metaphor for so many facets of our relationship? He wanted a home run? I'd give him a home run…
I took a deep breath, trying to collect myself. Between being a bundle of nerves over the outcome of this game and desperately wanting to jump my boyfriend, I was a basket case.
"Well well well, look at that. My boys finally came through. You just got a dirty ball," Edward crowed.
"That just sounds crude." I claimed the stack of ones.
"You have a one track mind," he teased.
"Yeah, well, you better accept that's all your boys might have today. Bottom of the 8th, you are down by one. Your fate rests on the next three outs."
"Don't put that stack of money away yet, Bella. You are going to need it."
God I hope so.
Ninth Inning - E
The stadium was getting rowdy. Someone started the wave, and we complied with the process.
"See, sheep," Bella remarked when it came back around and we stood again.
We were both on the edge of our seats when the first ball was pitched.
"STRIKE," the umpire called.
People all around us grumbled and moaned. Their complaints mixed with the occasional "Beer here."
"Strike two!" Bella hollered at me, while bouncing a little on her seat.
The batter teased us with a foul and ball before striking out on the 5th pitch. Profanities peppered the stands. People started throwing programs on the ground.
Bella looked at me and winked. "I would probably get lost in your apartment anyway."
Fly Ball at the Wall - B
Fucking Cleveland. The mistake by the lake. So help me god…
There was a gasp from the crowd as the batter was hit with a pitch.
"Runner on first, one out. Tides are turning Bella," he whispered in my ear.
The next batter took a swing at the pitch. It was up high and long. Everyone stood, watching, waiting….
It was caught at the wall.
I looked back at Edward over my shoulder.
"One more out, Edward. Do you believe in miracles? You might need one."
Men in Scoring Positions - E
As the big screen showed the batter warming up, I wondered if it was too late to buy off the Indians. If they won this game, I swore I would never step foot in that state again.
I'm not sure why it was so important to me. I mean, I could just ask Bella to move in with me. That would probably be the logical thing to do. But this way, neither of us felt as much pressure. Making the decision to live in sin as you will was scary. Losing a bet was luck.
Swing and a miss.
Bella nudged me. I scowled.
Ball.
I nudged her back. She laughed.
Next was a pop up foul, and we watched the crowd dive for it a few sections over.
Everyone was standing by this time. Completely impatient. On the next pitch, we heard the crack of the bat, and the batter was off in a hurry. It was a line drive the short stop missed. That put one on second, and one on third.
"Not quite loaded, but it'll do for now."
Honestly, Bella looked excited. If I didn't know better, I might wonder if her "Go Indians" was genuine. Maybe it was the just the anticipation.
Mr. November - B
Two men on.
Two outs.
Edward started laughing the minute the batter stepped into the box.
"What's so funny?"
He just smiled and pointed up at the screen.
Derek Jeter.
"Should that mean something to me?" So I was playing dumb a bit. I didn't follow baseball, but you'd have to be living under a rock to not know who he was.
"Tiger Woods, Michael Jordan, Wayne Gretzky, Derek Jeter."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"It means I might get my miracle after all."
The umpire called strike one.
The next two pitches were balls.
Strike two.
The game was almost over.
I leaned in close enough that only he could hear me.
"I might have said yes if you asked."
Swing and a Miss - E
Derek Jeter and I had something in common that day. We both struck out. The boos in the stadium were deafening. Bella and I sat staring at each other in stunned silence.
Her words echoed in my head. I was a damned pansy for playing this game. I should have just asked her in the first place. What the hell was wrong with me? Oh it'll take the pressure off! Yeah, I felt infinitely better now.
"Well, I guess that's that," I said dejectedly.
"Uh oh. Are you a sore loser?"
"Hell yes. And why do you look so unhappy? You won this bet."
"I don't really feel like I got anything out of it." She looked down at her lap.
People were filing out of the stadium all around us, but we continued to sit there. I couldn't ask her now, could I? It would just seem . . . anticlimactic.
When the seats around us were all empty, we slowly stood up to leave the stadium. I knew we should have been talking, but I was too frustrated. They just had to win one lousy game.
"Bella?"
"Yeah?"
I exhaled, and leaned up against a post, pulling her in front of me. "I hate the days I wake up without you. My apartment didn't feel like a home until the first day you were in it. I love seeing your toothbrush in the bathroom, and smelling your perfume on my sheets. I like going through coffee twice as faster and knowing I will need strawberry preserves every time I place a grocery order."
I took a breath and continued looking at her.
"Are you trying to say something, Edward?" she asked.
"I . . . well . . ." I knew what I wanted to say, and it was on the tip of my tongue, and after an entire day without even an instant of doubt, it wasn't coming out. It felt too real.
My own insecurity crept in. Were we really ready for this? Was I? It had only been a few months after all. I knew how I felt about her, but was it possible everyone was right? That I wasn't capable of this kind of relationship.
I looked up at her, not knowing how to complete my thoughts, and as always, she saved me.
Post Game Pep Talk - B
"Let's go home, okay? Some of the grounds crew is starting to stare at us, and I'd prefer that no one take a picture of us having this conversation, okay?"
Our subway ride home was quiet. Too many people around who stared a bit too intently; watched a bit too closely. I could tell that my lack of answer was bugging Edward, but the break gave me a chance to frame out my thoughts.
He threw it out as a joke, but we were both taking the loss hard. I wonder how we would have reacted had the Yankees won.
Once home, I pulled him out onto the terrace.
"God I love it out here," I sighed. The view of the park was fabulous, but being outside as the lights started to come on was absolutely perfect.
Edward sat quietly in a chair, his feet propped on the stone wall. I could tell he was waiting for me to start.
"You came up with that bet on a total whim today, didn't you?"
He sat quietly, looking out over the park.
"Yep,"
"Is it something that you had thought about before?"
He continued to gaze out over the park, not looking at me.
"Flashes here or there, but not really until last night. Would it sound trite to say you started it?"
I sat down on the terrace and leaned against the leg of his chair.
"How so?"
"The comment about our bed."
"Ah." I sat quietly for a moment, thinking about how best to proceed. "The day before we left for Washington, Emmett came to see me at work."
Edward didn't say anything. I felt him start to twirl a strand of my hair.
"I won't go into all the gory details, but let's say that Emmett and I came to an understanding. When he was there, he made a comment about how you dealt with sticky situations. I didn't pay much attention to it at the time."
I paused for a minute, trying to collect my thoughts.
"I may be blunt to a fault at times, but you always know where you stand with me. If I want something, I'll ask. If I think something, I'll tell you. I need you to do the same thing, Edward. You have angles that you play, bets you make, or you disengage entirely. You can't do that with me."
I leaned my head against his leg and closed my eyes. I hated to have this conversation after everything that we had just been through, but it was the right thing to do. I wrapped my arm around his calf, hoping to reinforce my words with my actions.
"I love you, and I want to be with you. But I can't do it because it was part of a bet, even if the intent was solid. I want you to ask me again…"
I felt him move, and I held on to his leg. Too afraid to see the expression on his face perhaps. Or maybe too afraid that he would ask me again right there.
"Let me finish. I want you to ask me again. Not now. When is up to you. But I want you to do it the normal way. No bets, no grand gestures, no angles. Just ask Edward. All I need is intent, okay?"
We were both quiet for a long time, listening to the sounds of the city around us. After what felt like an eternity, I felt him pick up the abandoned strand of hair and start twirling again.
"I love you, Bella. You know that don't you?"
I smiled and turned my head so that I could kiss his hand.
"You really don't need affirmation after everything we've been through lately, do you?"
I heard him laugh. "No, but it's always good to check."
We sat outside on the terrace until it was dark. Not talking, just being together. I used the quiet time to replay the day over in my head. There was one thing that I had been sure of, and it brought out a myriad of emotions. Joy, fear, hope, and most of all, love.
I took a deep breath, inhaling the typical New York smells, tinged with the ever present scent of Edward, and it brought it all home. I didn't have the courage to say it as any more than a whisper.
"I really wanted to lose."
Gah – no throwing of objects….trust us!!! There is a method to the madness!
They've both grown up big time, and are now at a place where they can make mature decisions not based on knee jerk reactions or hurt feelings. It's time to move forward. First on the agenda, time with Daddy Dearest.
HM4 will be at the Indians game on Sat Night – and will think of ya'll fondly while ogling Mr Sizemore (yeah, it's that good).
So the moment you all have been waiting for is looming. Dinner with Daddy. Did the tone of his call color your perspective on what might happen? Eh? What's your favorite thing about a baseball game? Come on – we want to hear it!!