Title: Forever

Disclaimer: I don't own anything except the crazy plots. Not even the songs.

Pairing: Kuroro and Kurapika.

Warning: Harsh language and adult themes.

Rating: Varies (T or M)

A/N: Hi guys. This is a collection of KuroxKura songfics. Once you read this, you'll be absolutely, completely certain that I am batshit insane!

CHAPTER SIX

MY HEART IS BROKEN

Author's senseless rant: 'My Soul To Find' past is soooo compatible with Evanescence songs.*dreamy sigh* Well, this is the last MSTF chapter. This time, the POV might surprise you. Hey, if reincarnations exist, spirits can as well. Enjoy!

I will wander 'til the end of time, torn away from you.
I pulled away to face the pain.
I close my eyes and drift away.

Over the fear that I will never find
A way to heal my soul.
And I will wander 'til the end of time
Torn away from you.

I should be happy, shouldn't I? After all, I got what I wanted. I was dead and as an additional bonus, Kuroro Lucifer was suffering. So then, why was I still here? Why am I so miserable? Most importantly, why was I standing near Kuroro's sleeping form, brimming with tears I could no longer shed?

I reached out and brushed my hand against his face. At least, I tried to. My spectral hand simply passed through him. He looked so young while sleeping. He definitely didn't look like a 33 year old man, more like a 20-something man. Some of his youthful appearance was due to nen; some of it was just the way he appeared. But his sleeping face had a pained expression on it. An expression that had made its way over there about 4 years ago, after my death. Before that, he used to sleep with an almost innocent expression. I'd never been able to call forth my hatred whenever I saw that expression. Over the years, I'd become fond of it.

As I watched, his body jerked fitfully and my name escaped his lips in a wistful whisper. I closed my eyes as sorrow washed over me. If only I could comfort him somehow. The hatred I once felt no longer existed. Truth be told, it had vanished almost entirely even before I embraced death. Now, his suffering made me ache to reach out to him and the fact that I was its cause made me miserable. I suppose I should be happy that I could feel so intensely even in death.

My heart is broken
Sweet sleep, my dark angel
Deliver us from sorrow's hold
Over my heart

My essence, my spirit was tethered to him. I wasn't complaining though. We were both responsible for this. I had yet to let him go and he had yet to let me go. I know full well that I will never stop loving this man. And I selfishly hoped that he wouldn't stop either. Atleast this way, I could stay with him. It was both a blessing and a curse.

I now knew that none of my tribesmen had ever wanted vengeance. They'd just wanted me to go on with my life. It was far too late now. And besides, towards the end, my life had more or less narrowed down to the raven-haired man who now lay before me. Fate seemed to enjoy irony.

I can't go on living this way
But I can't go back the way I came
Chained to this fear that I will never find
A way to heal my soul
And I will wander 'til the end of time
Half alive without you

Day by day, I watch him hurt, unable to reach out and take away his pain. It's agonizing to watch the man he was with me, only with me, vanish into the cold, stoic mask he donned. I know he feels guilty about my death. And I feel guilty whenever I see that lost look on his face that appears when he is alone, away from his comrades' concerned eyes. I desperately want to tell him that it wasn't his fault; that it was my choice. But I can't. All I can do is bear silent witness to his misery.

My heart is broken
Sweet sleep, my dark angel
Deliver us from sorrow's hold

He's waking up. He opens his eyes and they desperately search the space beside him, looking for someone; looking for me. The raw grief on his face as reality catches up with him is too much for me. I close my eyes, trying to block his anguish as well as mine. I no longer have a beating heart, but it still feels as if it is breaking. I reach out to him in another futile effort.

Someday, Kuroro, we will be together. Someday. Somehow.

Hey. guys, I was wondering if I should finish Forever before I leave. What do ya think? I leave on 29. Lemme know before that, 'kay?