Heya :) Once again I would like to thank the people who read and reviewed for the last chapter :D It makes me SO HAPPY, that you guys actually use some of your precious time to read my silly little fanfic ;)
I thought you might wanted to know what happened in Forks while Bella was in Volterra, so I decided to write this chapter and the next as well to update you on that front. This chapter takes place a few hours after Bella's abduction.
So, I hope you like it. There's an EdwardPOV and an AlicePOV in this chapter. I thought it would be best to let someone else describe Edward's actions, than Edward himself, which explains the APOV. Please tell me what you think about it afterwards :D
Twilight (c) Stephenie Meyer
Solar Eclipse - Chapter 4
EdwardPOV
I stood in the living room, watching while Esme and Alice put up huge boards on the now broken window and yet not really paying attention. I could feel my eyes follow their every move, their every breath, but it was like my eyes did those things on their own. It was like I had absolutely no control over my body. I felt hollow. Numb. My body was there, standing in the room among my family yet I was oddly absent.
It was like a part of me was gone - and not just a part, but the part – the part which held me together. The part which let me keep my sanity. It had gone and left behind a pathetically hollow shell. Empty. I was empty. She was gone. Someone had taken her away from me, and I hadn't been strong enough to keep her safe. I was weak, ridiculously weak that is, and to have ever thought I would be strong enough to protect her… Stupid. It was all my fault. I should never have brought her into this world. She had fought, time and again, against the monsters of my nightmare reality and it had never been fair to her.
She deserved so much more than I had ever given her. What had I ever given her? The only thing I had, the only thing I could give her was my love for her, but what good had come out it? The price for my love was far too high and I should never have let her pay it. I should have kept away from her, left like I had originally done, but this time have stayed away from her.
She deserved a life, a happy human life, far away from the horrors my kind always brought with us. She was so much more than I, even as a human I had never been half of what she was. She was kind and honest, loving and brave, forgiving and… just perfect in every way possible. She was my angel. My kind angel, whom I had stolen away. I was a monster and she had never belonged to me. She deserved so much than I could ever give her, than I could ever be for her. She… She… She was nowhere to be found.
I had searched for hours, looking for a trail, a scent, something that could lead me to her. I had found nothing. She was gone, taken away from me, and I had no idea whereto. Neither did I know who had taken her. My incompetence was astounding. I was even more useless than first thought. My angel was gone, and I was at fault. It was my fault. My fault entirely. My fault. My fault. Not hers. Why was she always the one to pay for my mistakes? She deserved so much more… So much more.
AlicePOV
I felt Edward's eyes on me as Esme and I finished blocking the hole in the window. He had been watching us for a while now, but I had yet to meet his gaze. I already knew what I would see if I did so and I just couldn't bear to see it. The hopelessness. I felt it in the room, like a heavy aura, cloaking itself around us. Stifling. The atmosphere in the room - the feeling of it in the air - was stifling, but to actually see it would be so much worse. And I knew - just knew - that Edward's face would mirror the feeling to perfection.
I had seen him earlier. He had been completely out of it, panicked beyond recognition. The two women and the boy had created a mighty chaos. Humans had been scattered everywhere, running in every direction possible in an attempt to get away from the vampires they instinctively knew to fear. I had tried, like the rest of my family and Tanya and hers, to keep the enemy away from them. From our human family and friends, but it hadn't kept me from noticing Edward's search for Bella.
Bella.
The mere thought of her name sent a stab of pain through my body, leaving me gasping for air I didn't need. Bella, my best friend, my sister. I didn't know how she'd gotten away from Edward. I had seen how he stood protectively in front of her when the intruding vampires first showed up, but then suddenly she was gone. The thought of not knowing how she got away from Edward worried me. If Bella had chosen to run off I ought to have seen it. And I hadn't. A sense of guilt and self-loathing crept in on me, and I let it. I should have seen it.
Why didn't I?
Forgetting my aversion to look at Edward I turned around to ask for his opinion. I was, however, instantly blown away by the sight in front of me. I insistently tried to keep my question in mind, but the sight of Edward, made my worries of fail seem childish and irrelevant.
Edward was in pain.
He stood still as a stone in the middle of the room, staring at me, but not entirely seeing me. His hair was chaotically dishevelled around his face, which was paler than usual. The shadows under his eyes where pronounced, dominating his features and creating a sinister contrast to the whiteness of his skin. He was beautiful even in his moment of despair, but it was a dark beauty that made me want to cry.
It was even worse than I had expected. His face was expressionless. I had feared the feelings eluding from his eyes, but the lack thereof was even worse. His eyes looked dead and cold. He looked lost. That was the only word for it. Lost. And empty, maybe. And I knew why. Bella was gone. He had already lost her once before, had already tried to live life without her, and I could only guess how he felt right now. He had lost her… again.
A sob sounded from my throat and I cupped my mouth in a useless attempt to keep it down there. I wanted to cry, but I couldn't. Instead another silent sob broke the silence.
I suddenly felt a hand on my back, drawing comforting circles on my exposed skin. I looked up, and found Jasper staring down at me, with an expression mimicking mine. The emotions of the room must have been horribly overwhelming for him, since I, who didn't have his gift, could feel them so strongly. I patted his hand which came to lie on my shoulder, letting him know I was there, yet trying to show as little affection as possible, without hurting his feelings. Edward didn't need to see that right now and from Jasper's expression he seemed to agree.
I looked around the room and found the rest of my family silently watching Edward as I had a moment ago. The Denalis did likewise.
I didn't know if everybody had seen Edward's search for Bella, but I was certain they had all seen the way he had rushed to her side when he caught sight of her.
Once again my mind wandered off to that fateful moment when I had seen Bella and Renée through the glass window. Moments previously I had been confused and agitated, since I couldn't see. My 'second sight' was gone and like any other time it had disappeared it annoyed the hell out of me. Back then I had mentally accused Seth Clearwater and his werewolf friends of being the source of my 'blackout', but now I wasn't completely sure. The werewolves only blocked parts of my sight, not all of it, and it just didn't seem to be the right answer.
I had worried I had lost my gift for good, when suddenly a flash of light had blinded me. A glimpse of a sight showed before my eyes only to disappear again a tenth of a second later. It had been enough to get my attention though.
Bella being dragged along by a vampire I had never seen before.
I had recognized the living room of the house as the place in my vision, and when I looked up I meet the ruby eyed gaze of the vampire in the vision. Without thinking I had screamed for Edward to come.
He had instantly heard me, and rushed by me with a speed that astonished even my vampire vision. The vampire's eyes were slightly anxious and alarmed when they met mine, but they soon went to the woman in front of him.
Renée.
He snapped something at her - I couldn't hear what through the noise of the fighting - but suddenly everything seemed to happen unbearably slowly.
I saw him throw Renée through the room, and before I knew it, I felt my legs running towards the house. I wasn't going to make it, but Edward was closer, so I thought he might.
He didn't.
I heard the scattering sound as the glass broke into millions of pieces, but it was the bloodcurdling scream that followed which made my feet run faster.
Bella.
I could think of nothing, but her name as I ran, with everything I had in me, for the broken window. I absentmindedly realized that the sounds of the battle changed around me, but I didn't stop to check. I saw Edward throw himself through the reminder of the window, paying only attention to Bella.
I increased my pace, and threw myself under Renée before she hid the ground. The smell of blood had erupted the moment she crashed through the window, and the sudden closeness made my throat burn. I held my breath as I tried to get up without rummaging too much. I was almost up when I heard a piercing scream which would have made my blood freeze if it still ran in my veins.
Edward's velvety voice rang through the yard, echoing a couple of times before the world went quite.
I ran the rest of the way to the living room, suddenly accompanied by other members of my family. I caught a glimpse of Edward's back as he raced through the door in the opposite end of the room, without a doubt following the vampire who had Bella. I ran after him, as did the others around me.
We followed him and the freesia-smelling trail of Bella a couple of miles through the forest until it suddenly stopped.
We all stopped in the outskirts of what seemed to be a small clearing or a meadow and watched Edward as he ran back and forth searching for a lead as to where Bella might be.
For a while we had all just watched him silently, but as the waiting became unbearable I had taken a step forward.
I didn't really know what I would have done if I had actually made it all the way towards Edward. It didn't really matter, because I hadn't. A small piece of silver on the ground caught my attention, as I almost stepped on it while entering the meadow.
A small silver comb decorated with precious blue stones.
The same comb Edward was now holding in his right hand while absentmindedly caressing the silver ornaments.
I took a deep breath before I let my feet move closer to Edward. I felt Jasper tighten his grip on my shoulder for a moment, before he let go entirely. I could feel his uneasiness about me moving closer towards Edward as if I had been the one to feel and control emotions. I guess that's what comes from living with someone for decades. You get accustomed to their feelings and even though I always considered his feeling above my own, in that moment I shook them off.
Edward wasn't going to hurt me. He was in pain and he needed my help.
I wasn't sure how I was going to help him, with my 'second sight' being gone and all, but I was definitely going to try.
I loved Bella too and we were going to find her, even if it was the last thing we ever did!
So what did you think? I don't like it when people blackmail readers for reviews, but I am tempted to offer an earlier update if I get a good handful of reviews ;) hehe…