WHEN THE SNOW FALLS
by Yih

Chapter Eleven
An Unexpected Tragedy

Watching Rukia run to do her duty to her squad and to her taichou gave Byakuya a feeling of both regret and pride – regret because he had to await her answer and pride that she was loyal to her squad. Any taichou would be lucky to have her in their squad.

Byakuya sighed and stared vacantly out at the night's sky, wondering if he had been too hasty and foolish approaching her all at once because of a moment's jealousy. He should have reined in this sudden rash urge to possess Rukia because of Renji. He should have acted in patient manner, slowly letting her get used to the idea of him as something other than her brother. He should have allowed the feeling of him as a man to grow stronger before asking her permission to court her. Now that would have been the right thing to do.

Not to kiss her impulsively like that and force a decision of that magnitude all of a sudden – that was wrong, but he couldn't take that back anymore. What was done was done and if her answer was negative, then he wouldn't bring up the issue again. It would be history.

At the very least, he would give her time to think. He would not press her for the answer and while he waited, he could attempt to approach in the respectable manner that she deserved. He just hoped that when she made up her mind, it would be an answer that would allow him to truly look forward to the future for the first time in years.

-

"Ukitake-taichou?" Rukia said in an uncertain voice when she saw that his office was shrouded in darkness.

"Come in Rukia," he said softly.

She walked into the room and knelt down before him respectfully. "You requested my presence?"

"I need your help."

Ukitake stared past her and she instinctively followed his gaze to a shadowed figure clutching what seemed to be a shinigami's robes. Rukia was about to ask who it was when she realized she knew exactly who it was. It was Kaien and the robes could only belong to Miyako.

"What happened?" she asked.

"They decided to take on an additional task after completing their original mission," Ukitake said carefully.

Rukia almost couldn't bear to say it, but she did: "What task?"

"Do you remember the mission you were assigned?"

She nodded slowly, staring at Kaien with pained eyes.

"They caught track of that Hollow on the way back from the other assignment. Of course, Miyako asked permission via a hell butterfly before they engaged in the fight," Ukitake continued in a far off voice. "Since she was one to ask for the assignment, it became her mission. Miyako knew a fair amount about the Hollow, having tracked it for a few days before coming back with information that it was weak and suitable for a debut solo mission, which became yours."

"Taichou…"

Ukitake turned to Rukia and placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. "Unfortunately, neither of them knew of the Hollow's special ability."

"What happened?" she asked in a shaking voice.

"The Hollow's tentacles have the special ability to break a shinigami's zanpakuto, if it is the first of the night to touch them, which sadly it was for Miyako." Ukitake paused in respect, sliding his eyes toward Kaien, who was still clutching his wife's robes. "Before Kaien could do anything, the Hollow possessed Miyako and he was forced to kill the Hollow and her…"

"Kaien-dono," Rukia whispered.

"He's been sitting there since he returned several hours ago," Ukitake said. "I've tried to talk to him, but he won't say anything. He won't move either. I didn't know what else to do. I even sent for Kiyone and Sentaro, hoping they would irritate him out of this, but he looked past them like they didn't exist. If I hadn't sent a hell butterfly with him and Miyako, I wouldn't even know what had taken place."

Her Taichou looked down at her with his kind, sincere eyes. "I have tried my best and I think you're the only in this squad that Kaien might respond to, otherwise I will have to send him out of the Seireitei to his family."

"Ukitake-taichou," Rukia said seriously, "I will try my best."

Ukitake smiled at her. "I know you will." He gestured to Kaien, slumped against the far wall of the office, seemingly isolated. "I will leave you to it then."

Rukia watched her Taichou rise from behind his desk and leave through the sliding door. Only after he had left did she turn her attention to Kaien. She didn't really know what to do, but Ukitake believed in her and how could she not go to Kaien and comfort him in the hour of his greatest need? He was her mentor; he was the one who had showed her how to be a true shinigami; he was truly a brother.

She realized at this moment that Byakuya had never been her brother, even though he was hers in name, that honor was Kaien's. Rukia shook her head, now was not the time to think of Byakuya. She would deal with that later. There were more important things that needed her attention.

Rukia rose to her feet and slowly, quietly approached Kaien. He never once raised his face to acknowledge her like the Kaien she knew would. Instead he sat still, unmoving. Rukia fell to her knees beside him and touched Kaien's shoulder.

He refused to look at her.

She wasn't about to give up.

"Kaien-dono," she said, then louder, "Kaien-dono!"

She shook him, but there was absolutely no response. No wonder Ukitake was so concern, why he had sent a hell butterfly to get her. Even she didn't know what to do, how to pull Kaien out of this.

He was alive, he was warm to her touch, but he was dead inside.

"I don't know how it feels," Rukia admitted softly, "to lose someone that you love so much, but even though it hurts, I think it would hurt Miyako even more to know that you gave up living because she died. You don't want to hurt her, do you Kaien-dono?

"I think it would make her happy to know that you're living a full life," she continued. "I would be if I were in her shoes. I think that—"

"What you think makes no difference," Kaien told her in the coldest voice she had ever heard from him. He didn't sound like Kaien at all. "I killed her Rukia. I killed my wife. Do you understand? I have her blood on my hands. How can I ever forgive myself? How can I live, knowing what I've done? How can I—"

Rukia couldn't stand to hear him accusing himself of something that he couldn't have stopped. Instead she threw her arms arm him and held him for all she was worth and said in a rush, "Do you hear yourself? Do you think Miyako would forgive you if you don't forgive yourself? You saved her from a fate worse than death! Now she can be reborn to a better life…"

She paused and forced Kaien to look into her watery eyes. "Miyako was the kindest, gentlest, the best person I know and I believe that her fondest wish would be for you to be as happy as you can be for now until you can rejoin her later."

Kaien stared at her with his blank dark eyes for a long, long time before he finally said in a hoarse voice, "Do you really think we'll be together sometime in the future?"

Rukia nodded fiercely, rubbing away the tears that threaten to streak down her pale cheeks. "How can two people who are destined to be together not be together?"

-

A/N: I'm sure you're all going ARGH, why did she do that? Well, this part of the story does serve a purpose as I'm sure the astute reader will pick up on. I mean there needs to be push for Rukia to be with Byakuya and what better push than this? It's the sum total of your experiences that tell you how you live your life and every moment has an effect, no matter how minor or how major. This experience would have a profound effect on Rukia and I hope that you enjoyed this chapter and I will try to get as many chapters out before my exams as I can. Please review, I love hearing from my readers on what you think and what you'd like to see happen or any of your thoughts! Thanks again!

One of the reviewers brought up a good question, they asked if it was going to be like the anime w/ Rukia's execution and all? Well, so far, we're still a couple of years away from that part of the timeline and already things have changed (i.e. w/ Rukia not killing Kaien). As for Rukia's execution, going to the real world, meeting Ichigo and the others, Aizen and the huge betrayal to the Soul Society, the Arrancar/Espada, etc. I'm not sure what I'm going to do, but it will all be incorporated in some kind of fashion. Yes, this is a romance, but I think I'll spice it up with some action as well. Keep you guys on your toes and all. If you have any suggestions, feel free to let me know what you think should happen. I'm all ears :).

Released on: 12/4/08