Disclaimer: I do not owe Inuyasha or any related character. Only in my dreams.
"Am I the face of the future? Am I the face of the past? Am I the one who must finish last?"
- Good'n Evil – Jekyll & Hyde
Chapter 1 – All About Rin
If someone had foresought the outcome of Naraku's death, it might have been reconsidered altogether, months back when the strange allies raced against their – by that time – worst enemy. No one held the power to unravel the mysteries of the future but the kami themselves, though. And if they did not see it coming – how could mortals do, taiyoukai or not?
Still, Sesshoumaru was never bound by restraints of whichever nature, being overwhelmed by the mere thought of having failed what was his. Who was his. And at that dreadful moment, five months after the spider's fall, he finally felt the weight of his mistake burden his square shoulders, ever so rigid and solid. She was dying. Rin. Slowly, but surely.
The small human child slept soundlessly under heavy covers, wrapped innards the coziest furs of the Western Lands, with her soft dark hair adorning her fragile, pale and sweaty face. The Western lord hadn't left for a whole day, as if his presence was the sole thing holding the youngster's life to the ground. Over the small futon, Rin seemed even smaller then he remembered, disappearing in the warm sheets. The last time she had been awake, the little ningen was about asking desperately for her Lord's permission to engage in some dance classes she heard about the town square. He, of course, had denied. He would make of her a proper lady, of course, but what dancing would grant her, objectively speaking? There was nothing to learn from it except, perhaps, some inappropriate behaviors. He watched as the joy instantly lifted from the child's face, as she obediently bowed and left him to his chores with a quiet "Yes, Sesshoumaru-sama". She never argued. Such a devoted child, his ward.
He wasn't a man of regrets. A youkai of regrets, for that matter. But he imagined if he could've maybe granted that small permission. That maybe, if his last memory of her was a happier one, he wouldn't feel these strange, uncomfortable turns in his stomach. What was this? Guilt? Sorrow? He knew none of those feelings. He was Sesshoumaru, the Lord of the West. He didn't mourn over a ningen. Specially one who wasn't even dead yet.
And won't be. – his beast roared between his thoughts, loud enough for him to comprehend it. It usually left him alone, but it's appearance in the name of the child shook him somewhat. Of course, outside he was just as stoic as ever, his pale, fine lines betraying no emotion. Inside, however, the turmoil was immensurable. Suddenly, he understood that whatever he felt – if he did feel something, after all – he must overcome in order to keep his beast at bay. It would do him no good to anger the wild creature within. It would only bring destruction to himself and his lands.
He was left to do what he did best – search. For information, for people, for things. Whatever may and might help with Rin's – and a lot of other ningens, though he cared not about any of those fools – illness. The first knowledge to be found was, of course, the origins of said disease. It was a evil of the soul, not of the body, and that was why the herbalists of his castle could not yet find a cure. And that was why, he also discovered, tenseiga wouldn't be able to heal anything coming of it. The soul was being eating from inside, and even though he could crash the hold of the creatures trying to take souls from this world, he could not – even if he tried, which he did – free the soul from whatever was plaguing it from within. It was dematerializing, slowly flowing back to the reign of the spirits and leaving behind what little a receptacle there was in this earth.
His research led him, a week after his insight, to an old priestess whose lineage served his father in his very birth. The family records told the story briefly, hiding details he was determined to unravel, explaining how his mother's poison affected his not yet formed body, slowing the gestation and causing unforeseen internal damage to both the mother and the pup. She bore him for two years until the priestess was found and, with her, a solution. He did not know what had been done, but felt it was in a way responsible for what he was, nonetheless. So he silently respected the old woman's family, even if he would not show the appreciation by any visible means except… well, not killing her after he was done.
She showed him proper respect, but no fear. She listened to his questions, but saw right through him to his reasons. She showed him the solution, but not the means to access it. He left her hidden forest with only a hope and a name: Shin'nen. A flower, unique and precious. So unique, in fact, he couldn't find any records of its actual existence in his library whatsoever, concerning him to some extent as Rin's time ran through his rigid fingerprints.
What he found instead was a legend. Old as time, written in a sealed parchment so worn out it could probably be dissolved by the lightest of Sesshoumaru's touches. Jaken held it up as he read, then, because as grumpy as he could be, the toad's hands posed no threat of releasing poison all over the paper, unlike the taiyoukai's.
The kami know love, trust and faith just as they share hate, betrayal and loss. The world above and beyond ours is no different, for the gods also mourn for what they once had and what they could never have, even in their unlimitedness. And when they do, they bless the world beneath. The tear of a kami can cultivate life where none grows. Blessed life, to bless the living through the harmony of light and dark, good and evil.
He sighed as the information sank in.
The day was bright and warm, one of those that held the promise of a refreshing bath, if Kagome could convince Inuyasha to diverge from their original path for the night time. They had been traveling at a fast pace for almost a week, almost as if they were running after – or from - Naraku.
They still journeyed on. Kagome, the beautiful and pure miko; Inuyasha, the careless hanyou; Shippo, the innocent kitsune pup; Sango, the fearless slayer; Miroku, her perverted husband and Kilala, their youkai friend. Not one of them was quite sure of the reason why they kept moving around the country, simply that it was how things had always been. They were a pack. They ate, laughed, slept, woke, walked, fought threats and ate again. It was odd to face a life outside that pattern. At least for Kagome and Shippo. The rest of the group slowly drifted off to their own ever desired lives. Naraku was gone. The jewel had been wished away. The life they deserved was unfolding, for each one of them, piece by piece.
Sango was pregnant, which meant she and Miroku would have to eventually – sooner rather than later – root somewhere to build their lives as a regular – well, as far in normality as the life of a slayer-monk couple could go – family. For weeks there had been intimate conversations on the topic, from where to live to what bring – or who bring along with them. They wished Kagome would join them, but knew that, in the end, she wouldn't. Her life was either with Inuyasha or in her own era, and they could provide none of those options in the humble provisions of a feudal village.
Inuyasha tried his best to adopt the façade he thought his pack position demanded; the responsible, strong and headstrong alpha he would never get to truly embody. He was not his half-brother, and he no longer shared Sesshoumaru's assumption that he should be. He was a half-demon, a hanyou. So what? His pack was alive. Naraku and all his traces, vanished. Provided he didn't have much to do with the ultimate fight – being Kagome the one to bring down the spider for good – he still felt he finally earned the right to be who he was. And live the life that was meant to be his, many decades before. But he tried. For some time he kept trying, even when no thread hovered above them any longer. It was tiresome. And day by day he, too, slipped down the road of his own choices. He chose Kikyou.
Kagome was surprisingly okay with the outcome of the situation. Inuyasha was what she could call her puppy love, if his dog heritage allowed her to make such pun, the sort of affection you'll get for a pet you cherish, or a younger brother you don't know anything of yet. She would, as both of them had realized by then, always love him in a way only the kami could understand. It ached her to see him leave for Kikyou – it really did. But not for the reasons she one day might've hoped. She merely wondered what shadow of a future he would share with the undead priestess. It was common knowledge – extended even to the hanyou himself – that the miko had had her run of life and would always be an empty shell, condemning her friend to a life full of dread, for once he was mated – it was for life. It was like that for all inu youkai, Kagome had learned; they could take as many mistress they wanted throughout their lives – concubines, as they called – but if they truly intended to mate someone, it was a once on all-lifetimes decision. Nothing in life nor death could break the bond. But… still… Kikyou was bound to die. She had returned to this world, and yet… Even though she could extend her life to some extent, she could never truly reach his life span, nor give him the pups she knew he had hoped to sire one day. It was his choice, all the same. And he was the one willing to live with its consequences.
With little to no complaint coming from her hanyou companion – astonishingly, Kagome managed to direct the pack to a meadow a few miles west, close to a cold, smooth spring, with shallow waters, perfect for the bath she was in desperate need of.
Sango declined her invitation to go and take a bath – she realized her best friend needed some quiet time with her husband, so she tried to convince her no further. Instead, Kagome took the opportunity to plainly enjoy the silence revolving her senses. Though she could eventually turn some of them off, nature's silence, like this, was rare and welcomed. It was not really silent. She could hear the leaves flowing, the bats moving between the dense forest, and the water moving around her, enveloping her body in a cloak of shimmer, enlightened by the moonlight tracing her nude features. And even so, it calmed her like only her mother's arms could.
She drifted into and out of sleep several times, taking small minute naps between her briefs swims. Her senses were still somewhat numbed, so she only noticed the barrier surrounding the area when the man who evoked it was already staring at her floating body, his feet pointing at her very direction.
With a gasp, Kagome tried to maintain some of her modesty, shifting and hiding her body under the cloudy water. Her heart missed a beat as she took the form a few steps away, in the grass. His tall, lean figure would be hardly replicated, but those eyes were what sent shivers all the way along her spine, making her straight up her body the best she could in front of the sharp glaring taiyoukai.
"Se…sesshoumaru-sama" was all her voice would give at the moment, even if she wanted to say much more. And she did. She wanted to scream, to submerge once more and disappear into the darkness beneath, away from the killing perfection targeting her.
"Miko." The taiyoukai acknowledged her, nodding his head just slightly before resuming his stoic position, towering over her from where he stood.
Kagome pondered how to proceed. The Western lord, in all his mighty coldness was practically breathing over her naked body. She shrieked in a smaller ball under water, trying to disappear, but realizing reality was crushing down on her as he twitched his lips in a smirk. What the hell was he thinking? She never saw Sesshoumaru smirking!
He had been waiting for over an hour for the opportunity to present itself. He could, of course, always collect the girl right in front of her petty pack. But he preferred, even so, to give her space to honorably consider what he was to demand. Yes. It would seem like an offer, perhaps even a request to her, but that was what it was: a demand. Sesshoumaru wanted, Sesshoumaru had it. It would be foolish to ever think differently, but he'd humor her this once.
When she finally wandered off by herself, the taiyoukai silently followed, quickly summoning a barrier in the immediate land around them as her body dropped in the water. His gaze slowly drifted from her surroundings to her shimmering body.
It was a sight. Of what exactly he couldn't be sure. But he found himself entranced by the curves he caught in the feminine figure floating in the calm spring. Youkai woman were beautiful in their own mystical way, but they bore not the soft lines of the ningen, nor her gentle light. Gentle…There it was, a word anew to his ancient mind. It fit with the freshness the miko had about herself. New, and pure. And…
Human. Weak. Breakable. Fool. Miko or not, reiki or not, in the end of the eve, she still was a filthy ningen, of the kind his father betrayed his whole lineage for. He couldn't see the appeal. She was too small, too fragile to bear strong pups, too free-willed to be a proper mate and not even half as charming as the concubines he'd taken in favor of his beast along the centuries. Sesshoumaru could do without women – his only pleasure came from power and the blood that came with it – but his inner beast had hunger to sate, and let him starve served him no purpose besides creating a war within himself. He had already one too many conflicts as it was.
He let her enjoy what little comfort she could indulge in before he let his youki spiral around them, revealing his presence just as he moved forward, appearing before her floating body.
"Se… Sesshoumaru-sama!" at least she knew better, treating him with his honored title.
She tried to concede her nudity – he could guess why, scenting her purity even from where he stood – but there was nothing he hadn't seen by then, foolish miko. Her lips trembled and her eyes widened in an innocent, yet horrified look. She feared him. Just as she should. He stepped slowly forward, approaching the line between grass and water with steady, predatory strides.
"Miko." He merely replied, stopping a step from falling into the spring. Nonchalantly, he inclined his body forward, bending above her, balancing gracefully in the point of his feet as his whole torso towered over her, shadowing her body, depriving her soft skin from the blue, pale moonlight, bringing an even more eerie appearance to the miko, now covered in darkness. Kagome – he remember vaguely her name – cringed and he couldn't help but drop his façade for miliseconds, drafting something alike a smirk in his tight lips.
'Yes. Yes, shrink away, little miko. This is your place. And you better keep that in mind if you want to get through me.' Somehow he acted as if she could actually hear his thoughts, and for a few seconds he awaited her answer. Realizing just how silly that had been – without giving it away, though – he straightened his back, returning to his full length before speaking again.
"Come, miko. This Sesshoumaru has come to fetch you." He made sure his voice held no doubt, no question. She pleasantly flushed, looking around as a cornered puppy. He then understood.
"Attire yourself properly, ningen, this Sesshoumaru does not have time to spare." He turned, giving his back to the small human as she obediently climbed out of the water and briefly wrapped herself in her tiny odd clothing. He would have to question her about that later on.
"Sesshou…maru-sama… What are you…" she started, but was caught of guard by his fierce gaze. Frozen in place, Kagome bit her bottom lip, feeling her breathing raise once more. "What can I help you with…?" she corrected, knowing he did want something of her, or he wouldn't have been so civil from the start. She could but only wonder what it was she, a human, could have to offer to the intimidating taiyoukai.
"You will come with this Sesshoumaru to retrieve an item lost to time itself." He approached her, feeding off of her confused expression. She didn't have to know. But he needed her cooperation so, once again, he decided to humour the woman with answers to the unspoken questions.
"It is this Sesshoumaru's knowledge where to find the flower able to heal the illness Naraku has spread. While this Sesshoumaru does not usually meddle into humans affairs, it is my duty as lord to stablish harmony between species, even the lower ones, like yourselves." He purposefully, of course, omitted the fact that his ward was afflicted by such disease. Kagome, though, was brighter then he'd credit her for.
She twisted her lips, feeling somewhat soft inside for his undesired show of affection. She knew he cared not about ningens, but he did protect his little ward, Rin, the adorable child she too grew to love as hers. As she was now feeling slightly more in control, the miko raised an eyebrow and asked.
"It's all about Rin, isn't it?"
AN: Hope you liked it. I do realize it might be a boring start, but I do have to set things up before the story truly begins, don't I? Review and favorite if you like, and please be patient if I made any mistakes. English is not my native language, after all! I'm looking for help, I still don't know how this whole BETA thing works, but someone suggested I should get one. So... anyone?