What Will Survive of Us
Chapter 2: Consonance
"Sokka, hurry up!" yelled Katara.
"Huh?"
"Earth to Sokka!" Toph chimed in.
Sokka was so distracted, he failed to notice that Appa had landed already. He blinked several times and sheepishly looked over at his friends as they waited for him to get off the sky bison's saddle. He figured that he must have been sitting there aimlessly for a while since he spotted Aang playing with a bored Momo, Zuko relaxing on the ice, his sister glaring angrily at him, and Toph shaking her head in amusement.
"Right. Sorry, guys," Sokka murmured as he jumped down onto the thick sheet of ice.
"What's with you?" asked Katara, clearly annoyed. "You barely said a word the entire ride and it took you a good minute to even realize we were here."
He shrugged and rubbed his arm. "I don't know. I guess I'm just really tired."
"Since we're all down now, let's head on over to the palace!" Aang exclaimed, his attempt at lightening the mood.
Whenever the situation called for it, Sokka was usually the one who helped Toph by carrying her around. He was obviously preoccupied with his own thoughts, so Zuko took the initiative to help the girl off of Appa's large tail where her bare feet had been safe from the frigid air and icy floor. She shuddered when her feet no longer felt the flying bison's fur.
Zuko looked down at the girl he held and asked, "Why didn't you bring any shoes?"
"I never wear shoes," Toph replied with a smirk. "You can just help me look for a snazzy new pair of boots in the city."
The group bristly walked toward Chief Arnook's palace and greeted various people along the way. Everyone was bustling about with excitement for tonight would mark the first New Moon Celebration since the start of the War and the first time all three Water Tribes would be together. This is also the second visit to the Northern Water Tribe for Aang, Katara, Sokka, and Zuko and the first for the young Earthbender. They were all eager for the festivities to begin and chatted merrily amongst themselves as they moved through the city of ice. To their amusement and surprise, they spotted Huu, Tho, Due, and other members of the Foggy Swamp Tribe dressed in traditional Northern attire and socializing with their polar brethren. Sokka, on the other hand, uncharacteristically remained quiet and distant from his friends.
It has been over a year since Princess Yue sacrificed her life for the good of the world and became the new Moon Spirit, but Sokka still has not been able to forgive himself for what happened that fateful night. When the group was told of the Celebration weeks ago by his father Hakoda, he was excited and scared all at once—excited because this would be the first New Moon Celebration in decades and scared because of all the memories that would return to him. The young warrior felt horrible for thinking this, but he was glad that Suki was unable to accompany the group to the North Pole. No matter how much Sokka loved her, he could not deny his lingering feelings for Yue. After all, the princess was his first love and would always hold a special place in his heart. Being constantly reminded of her presence every single night did not help the Tribesman's situation either.
"Dad!" Katara cried as she ran over to her father to give him a warm hug. The War was over, but all his absent years in the Southern Water Tribe made the girl cherish each and every moment she had with him.
"You're all finally here!" Chief Hakoda said with a large smile. "Took a bit longer than I thought. Not trying to get out of work, are you?"
The entire group laughed before Aang replied energetically, "Nope, not at all! What can we do to help?"
Hakoda grinned as he looked towards the Avatar and the Firelord. "We could use a bonfire..."
Zuko and Aang glanced over to the other and smirked. "Just tell us where to go and we'll create the biggest bonfire in the entire northern hemisphere!" declared Zuko.
"I will show you the way," a new voice spoke from afar. Everyone turned to find Chief Arnook approaching them. "Welcome, all, to the Northern Water Tribe. It is an honor to have you all here to celebrate the arrival of the New Moon and the end of the War with all three Water Tribes."
"Wouldn't want to be anywhere else!" announced Katara as everyone else nodded in agreement.
"Now, right this way," Chief Arnook chuckled at the group's enthusiasm. "There is still much to be done before nightfall."
As Aang and Zuko lit several torches and helped create three enormous bonfires, Katara used her Waterbending to manipulate the ice into tables and chairs for all the attendees while Toph went off somewhere with Hakoda to get herself a pair of boots. Sokka set up various booths with other members of the different Tribes, but could not shake the thought of Yue out of his mind. He would find himself gazing absentmindedly at the dark, barely visible, moon in between the heavy lifting and felt guilty each and every time he did so.
Get a grip, Sokka, he told himself. You're here with your family, friends, and fellow Tribesmen to have a good time. Stop doing this to yourself.
He tried. He tried desperately to not look up into the night sky again. He hated himself for being so weak, but he knew he could never stop. He just couldn't help himself.
This isn't fair to you...or to Suki.
The beautiful warrior from Kyoshi Island has been with him through thick and thin. They both did their part to end the War and fought side-by-side numerous times. The young couple loved each other dearly. Suki gave her whole heart to him and it made him sick knowing he hasn't been completely truthful to her; he still thought of Yue. Sokka thinks of the princess every night and still blames himself for her death. Irrational as it may be, the young Southern Tribesman still had the notion in his head that he could have saved her that night. Chief Arnook assigned him to protect his only daughter and he failed. He failed Yue, her father, and himself. Sokka missed the Moon Spirit dearly and still loved her.
"How is everything, Sokka?"
The young man quickly looked up to find his sister standing before him.
"Good," he said flatly.
Katara took a seat next to him before apologizing, "I'm sorry I was so annoyed with you earlier. I guess I was just excited for tonight. You know how impatient I can be."
"It's fine. Don't worry about it, Katara."
The Waterbender had no idea what to say next and abruptly decided to ask, "What's wrong?"
He remained silent and stared ahead aimlessly.
"It's Yue, isn't it?"
The warrior merely let out a small sigh. At that moment, he realized that although Yue has been occupying his thoughts the entire day he did not actually hear her name aloud until this moment.
"Alright, don't say anything. You don't have to. All I ask is for you to listen to me, alright?"
In response, her brother glanced over sullenly.
"Sokka, we all loved Yue. It was hard for all of us to see her leave."
He looked away once more and stared at the ground while his sister continued to speak softly to him. "I can't imagine how you must have felt seeing her fade away like that, but it's been a year. A year, Sokka, and you have Suki now. By thinking of Yue you're not being fair to Suki, the girl you have with you and the one who has always stood beside you. Suki loves you, Sokka, and I know you love her too. She deserves your whole heart, not just a piece you can spare for her. You can always love Yue, but only in the way the rest of us do: as a friend, a sister, a guardian."
Hot tears slowly dropped onto the ice. The swordsman never cries too often so, whenever he did, it was always a surprise to Katara. She meant to have had this talk with her brother for some time now, but never knew when the best moment for it was. She knew he was thinking of Yue since the day they found out about the Celebration; since then, Sokka has been listless and inattentive. As his sister, Katara knew differently—she knew Yue was the first thing that entered his mind and it broke her heart to know from the look on his face that the Moon Spirit still has not left his thoughts. She couldn't bear to see him so down and forlorn, but knew what she told him was the right thing for him. No matter how much it hurt him, the Waterbender had to say it eventually.
The girl said all she needed to, so she decided to leave her brother alone. "It wasn't your fault, Sokka."
It was right here on this very spot so many moons ago, right here on this patch of grass Sokka sat on, where his first love perished in his arms. It amazed him how he remembered everything about that night in accurate clarity:
Like the clothes he was wearing.
The clothes she was wearing.
Or the horror in everyone's eyes when Zhao killed Tui, the original Moon Spirit.
The anguish on her face, the sorrow that curled off of her like smoke.
It amazed him how warm the Spirit Oasis was despite the tragic events that took place only a short year ago.
He felt selfish, but everyday he wished that Yue had not sacrificed herself. He knew she did it because only she could save the Moon Spirit, he knew she did it for the greater good, he knew it was the right thing to do, but it hurt so much when she left. It still hurt. Sokka had no idea why he even walked away from the festivities, where he could have possibly forgotten about Yue for a fleeting moment, for the site of her death.
Yue.
She was the bravest person he had ever known. He felt silly for thinking such a thought when he personally knew Aang, the current Avatar who endured so much indignity and shame and suffered the greatest loss in the world due to the War; Zuko, the Firelord that was scarred by his own father, abused his whole life, and felt so much remorse for all the pain he and his forefathers caused to the rest of the world; and Toph, the greatest Earthbender in the world who has never been fully appreciated by her parents and was constantly looked down upon wherever she went because of her blindness. Aang is the last Air Nomad and has the weight of the world on his shoulders, Zuko is the ruler of a nation slowly rebuilding its honor, Toph is the discoverer of Metalbending who doesn't even know how her own face looks like. Everyone he knows has gone through so many trials and tribulations throughout their lives, but the difference is that they are all alive and well during a new era of peace while Yue was nowhere to be found. Yue could never experience this new life with the rest of her friends. For that and for her sacrifice—at least to Sokka—she is the embodiment of courage.
Sokka felt tears well up in his eyes again. He hated feeling so vulnerable, but he couldn't help himself whenever Yue occupied his thoughts.
Yue...
The Southern Tribesman buried his face in his hand and sobbed quietly. None of this was fair. He wasn't being fair to Suki, the girl he loves. He wasn't being fair to his friends and family by behaving this way. He continues to torture himself over his loss and that was certainly not fair to him. Sokka knew he deserved happiness with Suki, but he just wouldn't allow it because, at the same time, he felt that he didn't deserve an ounce of joy. He was punishing himself and was intent on keeping it that way.
Suddenly, a warm light appeared from behind the clouds and shined down onto the pool.
"It can't be..."
Above the water was a vision of Yue.
"No, this is just a trick. Just like that day in the Swamp."
The illusion murmured sweetly, "Sokka..."
"No!" the warrior yelled, grabbing his head and turning away in fear. "Don't do this to yourself, Sokka!"
"Sokka," Yue said once more. "This is no hallucination. Please, look at me."
He slowly lowered his arms and looked up at the Moon Spirit. "H-how can this be?"
She let out a small laugh. "Tonight marks the first new moon of the year, one of several nights when my presence is at its strongest. The others are during the full moons and the winter solstice. I'm sure you've noticed."
Sokka gulped before replying, "Of course I have, Yue. Those are the nights I dream of you. They're always so vivid, as if you're right there with me." He felt his eyes water once more. The medley of the different emotions hitting him all at once was completely overwhelming.
"That's because I am," Yue declared, smiling warmly. "Before I disappeared, I even told you that I would always be with you. I come to you whenever I am able to through your dreams, but you've been so weary and disillusioned lately. I had to visit you tonight to help put your mind at ease."
The Tribesman slowly walked over to the pool to stand closer to the first girl he ever loved. Unashamed and unable to hold back any longer, he let his tears flow freely. Sokka was so unbelievably happy to be able to talk to Yue again, to see her, to hear her sweet voice.
"Please, I beg you to forgive yourself," implored the Moon Spirit. "What happened that night on this very spot so many moons ago was not your fault. I was destined to become the Moon Spirit the day I was saved by Tui as an infant. It was also my duty as the Princess of the Northern Water Tribe to do whatever I could to protect my people. Forgive yourself, Sokka. You have Suki now and she loves you dearly. She has been with you through Fire Nation raids, the day of Sozin's Comet, and she is still with you. Suki can give you what I cannot. Please, Sokka. I love you, but I want you to be happy. As Katara said earlier, give her your whole heart. My own warms whenever I see you with her. Around Suki, you're immediately filled with comfort and overcome with bliss. Around me you only feel despair. Even the slightest thought of me brings you nothing but pain."
"But I miss you so much..."
"I miss you, too... I love you dearly and that is why I can no longer see you in such agony. I appeared to you tonight to tell you to let go of me, Sokka. I will always be with you, but you're in love with Suki, not me. Give her your heart and you will feel my smile upon you, always."
Sokka blinked, allowing more tears to cascade down his face. "I know Katara was right then and I know you're right now," the Tribesman said quietly, acknowledging everything she just told him.
"Goodbye, Sokka. My 'lunar goodness' will always be with you," giggled Yue.
He sheepishly looked away, slightly embarrassed. "You heard me say that?"
"Of course," she laughed.
"Goodbye, Yue," Sokka whispered sadly.
He promised her that he'd forgive himself and that he'd give Suki his whole heart, but he just couldn't help himself; saying goodbye to his first love with mere words was not enough. Sokka walked towards the benevolent spirit as she lowered her form into his arms. They shared one final kiss in the Spirit Oasis under the brilliant stars before she vanished, tears clearly visible in her eyes as well as his own.
"Goodbye, Yue, and thank you."
"Are you sure you don't want us to stay?" asked Katara.
"Nah, you guys go on ahead. I'll Unagi it over to the mainland or something," Sokka answered with a grin.
He waved farewell to his friends as they took off on the great sky bison before turning around to walk up the road to the main village on Kyoshi Island. After his fateful encounter with Yue two weeks ago, Sokka couldn't help but feel completely renewed and full of life once more. With Yue, he has finally come full circle and got the closure he desired and desperately needed. After the end of the New Moon Celebration, the warrior knew he had to visit Kyoshi Island before returning home.
The swings and slashes of the warriors' metal fans emanated loudly. He poked his head inside the structure where Suki and the rest of the Kyoshi Warriors spent most of their time training tirelessly to hone their skills and prowess in battle. The young man couldn't help but smile at his own foolishness the first time he visited the island.
"Look, Suki!" gasped a grinning Ty Lee.
The leader looked over at the entrance. "Sokka!"
"Suki." He let out a huge smile as she quickly made her way over to him.
They hugged before Suki allowed the other Kyoshi Warriors the rest of the day off. Her fellow warriors giggled amongst themselves as they left the young couple alone.
"Tell me all about the Celebration!" Suki said cheerfully. "I wish I could have gone, but we had our first annual retreat to Ba Sing Se. I should have changed the date so that it didn't conflict with the Celebration."
"It's fine, Suki. We can all go together next year," he told her warmly. "And it was great. Really eye-opening."
The two teenagers stepped outside to walk in the nearby garden. They found a good resting spot near a small flowerbed.
"So, what kind of things did you do up in the North Pole?"
Sokka decided to be truthful. "I met Yue again."
Caught off guard, she was unsure of what to say. "Oh..."
"I'm sorry, Suki," he apologized. "I haven't been completely honest with you up until now but a part of me was still in love with her; a part of me still felt guilty over her death."
Crestfallen, Suki glanced toward the flowers, unable to bring herself to look at the one she loved.
"That's why she came to me. She told me to let her go completely so that I could give myself to you. After so many months of blaming myself over what happened the last time I was in the Northern Water Tribe, I feel at peace. I finally feel peace. I'm ready to give you my whole heart and I'm sorry it took me so long to do it."
The Kyoshi Warrior immediately burst into tears. "You won't believe how long I've waited for you to tell me this!"
"Huh?"
"I knew you still loved her. It was so obvious. I never felt good enough, I always compared myself to her. I was so jealous, so envious, but I loved you too much to just let you go. I decided a long time ago that I'd wait for you to become mine and mine only."
"You can thank the Moon Spirit for that," Sokka murmured softly. "I'm so sorry you felt that way for so long. I had no idea. The whole time, I was focused on my own feelings and thoughts and didn't even consider how you must have felt. I was so selfish. Suki, I'm sorry."
Without a second thought, Suki wrapped her arms around the boy she loves and gave him a kiss. "You oaf, you don't have to apologize. Just tell me you love me."
"I love you."
She smiled the brightest smile Sokka has ever seen. Tears continued to run down her face and he instinctively wiped them away.
The Tribesman repeated, "I love you, Suki."
"I love you too, Sokka," she told him before they kissed once more.
Note: To anyone who doesn't know: the New Moon Celebration is an actual celebration in the Avatar universe. It was mentioned in Escape from the Spirit World, a canon online game/comic, during Avatar Kuruk's part.
Holy crap, this update has long been overdue. I'm sorry to all readers, reviewers, and all those that favorite-d this story and/or put it in their alerts. I apologize. College has been difficult and I couldn't find much time for writing (if I did have the time I just couldn't think of anything :X writers' block FTL). It's finally summer and I'm back home now, yay! I've actually been home for about a month now...so I could have updated earlier. Sorry about that, but I've just been too busy babysitting my niece, hanging out with friends, and playing video games. Haha XD; I'll try to update more periodically from now on (but I won't promise anything x-x).
I hope y'all liked this chapter and had enough Sokka/Yue and Sokka/Suki to appease all you shippers out there, lulz. :P Keep an eye out for chapter three. Reviews and feedback's always appreciated, thanks! ;3 Oh, and if you find a typo or any sort of error, it was an accident. No matter how many times I edit and re-edit, there's always at least two that I miss! It's frustrating. T-T I'll be rechecking and rereading this often to edit any and all mistakes, haha.