A/N: Ok, this chapter is awfully delayed and I am sorry for that
But I guess that's what you get for writing many stories all at once even though you've got no free time
And yes people, it is bloody July and I have no free
You can go ahead and blame the educational system for that
However I will not stop if I don't finish this story
So I beg you …some patience
Sorry again,
Enjoy!
Chapter 8: Full Of Contradictions
Then I take one look at my new friend and cousin finally meeting.
I smile at myself as I hear a voice from behind me whispering.
"Good job, Miss 'fairy-godmother'." Malfoy.
"So…that is the truth in Cinderella huh?" I ask him still smiling. He was right. After all, I see it now.
"Ten points to Gryffindor." He jokes playfully. "I told you I would finally find it."
"Indeed you did." I smirk my 'not-even-close-as-nice-as-Malfoy's' smirk and look up at him.
I have to admit that once again he does look nice. He's on a black suit that would look plain on anyone but Malfoy. Because on him it looks perfect. Aristocratic but not too formal. Damn him and his good looks.
His hair are, just as always, messed up, but not like my cousin's. His is somehow neatly messed up. If there is such a thing as a neat mess…
"You're staring Weasley. But then again… I don't blame you." He sniggers and I narrow my eyes. However I am rather sure he is joking.
"And here, I thought you weren't into Balls." I comment . Quite cleverly may I add.
"I'm not. I just acknowledge the fact that since I came I'd better save myself from characterizations such as 'no style whatsoever' or 'I'd be ashamed to appear in public like that'." I chuckle. It's true, why deny it? People in general have this absurd tendency to judge. Everything and everyone. And unfortunately I would have to include myself in this rule.
"Well, you should get over it. Take my example." He looks down on me playfully.
"Your example?" He inquires and puts his hands in his trousers' pockets.
"Not caring about how you look. I mean I came here even though I look pitiful in this old summer dress." He starts laughing like I said some sort of joke and I raise an eyebrow.
Then noticing my reaction he suddenly gets all troubled.
"Oh! You were serious." Well…yeah!
"Obviously." I raise my hands in exasperation.
"It's just that…" Yes…
"You look…" Yeeees…
"Just…" Oh dear Merlin if it takes him so long to utter one sentence this is gonna be a long night. Silly me, thinking that Malfoy is smart like that…
"Are you planning on finishing the sentence any time soon?" I say a bit annoyed. Well, he has gotten on my nerves that boy. I look up at him only to come across another un-Malfoy reaction. He is blushing. Of course not the Weasley blush, that makes you resemble a tomato…no! His own very arrogant blush. Just a little on the pale cheeks. Hardly visible.
"You look just…fine!" He finishes and I feel somehow disappointed. Like I did when Air didn't comment on my looks the first time he saw my face.
"I doubt it but thanks anyway." He smirks at me knowingly. Like he can see disappointment all over my face. Damn him.
"So care to dance?" I ask trying to snap out of my own thoughts.
"Wha-? Oh yeah…sure." Malfoy nods and follows my to the dance floor.
There he catches my waist hesitantly and avoids coming too close. I must admit I didn't see that one coming. I mean Malfoy with his flirtatious character ought to be a little bolder in the whole dancing idea.
But then again I don't mind his cold feet at all. He can't make me enjoy dancing as much as Air does even if he wanted to. That's for sure.
"I'm not a good dancer really." He apologizes. Yes, I can see that.
"Me neither." I reply truthfully. He smiles. A weird smile. A really weird smile. Like he knows something I don't.
"Ok." However he doesn't doubt my words.
"So do you think it'll work?" I ask after a while. If we don't get to really dance then at least we could talk.
"With Al and Nelia? Yes I'm sure it will. I mean could the prince not get Cinderella?" I laugh against him. No. He could not.
"Good cause I'd hate to have them both tearing over a Ball gone bad." As we keep dancing I feel Malfoy loosening around me. Getting more relaxed. And by doing so his grip in my waists gets tighter. More stable and intense. I think it is the only time it takes one to relax in order to become more intense.
This saint is full of contradictions. Messy yet neat. Flirtatious yet hesitant. Relaxed yet intense.
"Don't all Balls go wrong?" He inquires truthfully.
"This one hasn't yet." I let slip. I know it sounds like no big deal, but to my 'Malfoy vocabulary' that must be revealing that I'm in fact having a good time. Which I do but I'd rather not let him know.
"The key word being 'yet'." I add and he smiles sad.
"Do you want it to go wrong?" He proceeds to ask.
"I kinda do actually. I mean a good Ball will probably ruin my bad opinion in Balls generally." He stops dancing suddenly…What a pity and I was beginning to enjoy the dancing part…
"Then I will be happy to oblige." Hey! What does that mean? He will oblige? Meaning he will ruin it for me?
But before I manage to proceed with my questioning his words I see him leaning slowly towards my face.
Then I feel his lips on mine. I close my eyes. Now whether it is from the impact or for the sake of the occasion I can't really tell, cause he's kissing me. Malfoy is kissing me!
I mean…what the hell?
And it doesn't feel bad either. Truth be told it feels great. My body shivers a bit and I feel something moving in my stomach as his lips move skillfully yet scared on mines.
Skillful yet scared. Isn't that another contradiction?
But suddenly and while I kiss him back Air's image comes to mind. My falling in love with him raising a wall between me and the blonde Slytherin.
So even though I do like the way it feels to kiss him I step back.
I decided to follow Air's advice and stop being so heartless.
Making out with Malfoy even though I don't see him like that is probably considered heartless so…
"I-I'm sorry…" I mumble and blush. His face is unreadable. His eyes are dark alright but a faint smile is plastered on his mouth.
"Nothing to be sorry about." He breaths but for some strange reason I doubt it.
"It's not like you're bad or anything. I mean half the school girls are after you. You don't need me to tell you, you are cool, but I-… I think I'm in love with someone." There I said it. Phew.
"What?" Now his expression is surely grim.
"But I thought you were heartless." He thought…But how does he know…? I must have let it slip…
"Key word being 'were'." I clear up.
"Oh!" Is all he says. Then smiles the fakest smile I have ever seen in a man.
"That's good." And I have seen many fake smiles on men…
"Yeah, well we'll see." I say half-heartedly. He only nods. Silence falling heavy on us both.
"I'd rather go." I know this is officially considered jerking out of a situation which you created but I have no other choice. I can't face Malfoy right now.
So I don't even wait for a confirmation. I just flee away from him.
I run back to the Gryffindor Common room. Back to my dorm and let myself drop on the bed heavily.
I don't understand why it messed me up so much, this kiss with Malfoy. A kiss means nothing really. I've done things much more serious with guys I didn't even like.
My mind goes back to Malfoy's kiss and I finally see what was it that drives me crazy about it.
It was just as good as the kiss with Air. Annoyingly equal.
But I'm in love with Air! How can a simple kiss change that?
No. My sentiments can't change. Air is so much better than Malfoy. He's kind and caring but playfully and witty and mischievous all the same.
And Malfoy is just Malfoy. I mean the guy was my enemy till lately, how can he compare to Air?
And though I really honestly have fallen for Air. Though I know what I want. Though Air is so much more to me than the blonde guy I kissed some time before…I still feel strangely incapable to let go of that kiss. My mind keeps going back there.
So after countless –failed- attempts to fall asleep I make a deal with myself.
I'm going to think of Malfoy as if I felt something for him.
Just for tonight I will enjoy the memory of this kiss as if I was in love with him.
And surely till tomorrow this memory will be gone.
Cause I really, honestly love Air.
So what if tonight I let the image of a certain blonde run loose in my mind?
What if, just for this night, I let this guy whose full of contradictions kiss me goodnight?
A/N: So….what do you think????
Please tell me
Press that little button and review!
I love ya all
And I too kiss you goodnight (in the most friendly manor of course!)
Sarah