Sorry i haven't update for a while, i was a bit busy and i had some major writter's block.

this chapter is to DramaQueen90, who pestered me to write and xoxEllexox, who wrote a small section of this chap for me :)

Chapter 22 – It's Better to Lose Love Then Not Love

It was the morning after Abby found out about her pregnancy, and after the initial shock she became rather excited.

She and Ziva planned to go to the doctor's together (and Ziva had made her and Kate swear not to say anything until Tony knew; she would only tell him when she knew for sure)

Abby walked confidently into the squad room and straight to McGee's empty desk. She sat in the chair and waited.

"Hey Abs, what's up?" Asked Tony,

"Just waiting for McGee." She smiled,

Abby thought back to the night she became pregnant.

After hearing that Ziva and Gibbs had gone to Cartagena to meet Tony she was over the moon. She was convinced Tony would come back from being afloat and he and Ziva would be together again.

She was so excited Caf-Pow wasn't giving her, her normal kick. Lucky for her she had a spare 'emergency' bottle of Vodka in her fridge. Eight Vodka-Caf-Pows later when Tony was back and wanted some private time with Ziva, she made an excuse about her Tony wall and dragged McGee to her lab.

She had carefully removed the pictures from her wall then ripped the countdown and threw it in the bin. When she turned she saw McGee staring at her butt.

"McGee!" She exclaimed, smiling cheekily,

"I wasn't looking! Not that I uhh wouldn't uhh want to look- Not that I have before." He panicked, looking at the floor,

"That's okay Timmy, I still love wether you behave in a Red or Green light manner." She went to peck him on the forehead but at the exact same time he looked up, and her lips ended up pecking his.

They stared at each other without moving for two whole minutes before both going at the other, melting in passion.

So now, roughly a month later, she sat at his desk, waiting to tell him that their loss of control ended with her bearing his child.

"Hey Abby, what are you doing here?" Asked McGee as he walked into the bullpen towards his desk,

"Hi Timmy! I came to tell you something."

"Oh? What?"

"Well I have some news," Said Abby, "And I think you would want to know."

"Ok…" Said McGee, frowning at her vagueness,

"Well Timmy, I'm-"

"Abby!" interrupted Ziva, "Can you come here a minute?"

Abby frowned and looked at McGee and Kate who both shrugged, Abby turned and walked to Ziva.

"I do not think it wise," Whispered Ziva, "To tell him while in the company of the others. You should go somewhere more private."

Abby laughed, "It'll be fine Ziva, don't worry." She walked back to McGee, "As I was saying," She grinned, "Yesterday I found out something really amazing."

"Yea?" Asked McGee,

"Yup! I'm pregnant McGee, can you believe it?!"

"What?!" exclaimed McGee and Tony,

Abby turned to Tony, "McGee's gonna be a dad!"

"Have you been to the doctors?" Asked Tony,

"Not yet but I have an appointment soon; not that I need it. I know I'm pregnant, I can feel it in my gut."

"Isn't it a bit early to be able to feel the baby?" Asked a shocked Ziva,

"She's using an expression." Explained Kate,

"You've known Gibbs for four years and you still don't understand the term 'gut feeling'?" Teased Tony, laughing disbelievingly,

Ziva glared at him.

Are you sure it's mine?" Asked McGee suddenly, breaking the silence,

"Yup! There's, well… It can't be anyone else's." Blushed Abby,

"Wow…" Whispered McGee, "That's amazing."

"Congratulations McDad …and you Abby." Tony got up and hugged Abby, then patted McGee on the back, Kate and Ziva stood, and hugged McGee and Abby,

"You'll be a good father, McGee." Said Gibbs before walking to the cat-walk, sipping a coffee

"When did Gibbs get here?" Asked Tony,

"No idea, the man is magic!" Grinned Abby,

* * *

That night at eight o'clock Tony sat on the couch his arms around Ziva; they were watching one of his movies (well he was watching the movie, Ziva was reading her book).

The book was a romance and it was getting quite hot… and graphic. Ziva bit her lip and put the book down. She looked at Tony and climbed on him, straddling his hips.

"Hey! Watching a movie here!" He complained,

Ziva unbuttoned his shirt, kissing his neck.

"Ziva," Groaned Tony, "Ziva, what's got into you?"

Ziva looked him in the eye, before saying in a seductive voice, "Nothing… yet."

"You'll be the death of me." Muttered Tony before taking a tight hold around her waist and standing, carrying her up the stairs, into their bedroom.

Ziva covered him in kisses, clinging to him, savouring every moment. Tony ran his hands up her sides, removing her nightgown as he did so. She kissed him deeply while pulling his pants and boxers off and throwing them to the side. He turned her so he was pressing her into the mattress, but before he could do anything he was on his back with Ziva sinking down on him with a moan.

"I love you Tony" She murmured against his lips when she began moving slowly.

He ran his hands up her back as her hands gripped his shoulders. She began to kiss his neck again and soon enough they were screaming each other's names and collapsing in a heap of tangles limbs.

Tony pulled Ziva close to his chest, "I love you too." They kissed tenderly before Ziva yawned and settled comfortably in Tony's arm,

When Tony was sure she was asleep he started to whisper to her. "If I ever lost you Zee, I don't know what I'd do. I can't spend another three years of my life being hung up on one girl or the other. God Ziva, it really scares me; how much I love you. How much I'd do for you." He sighed and kissed the top of her head, pulling her closer still.

There was an echoing knock at the door and Tony groaned. He carefully moved Ziva then pulled on his discarded boxers. He walked out, closing the door.

The sound woke Ziva from her light sleep and she heard Tony walk down the stairs as more knocking echoed through. She sat up and listened carefully.

Tony opened the front door and saw Kate smiling eerily at him.

"Kate?"

"Hey Tony." Her smile fell from her face as she saw he stood in just boxers, his hair ruffled and bite marks up his chest and neck, "Oh, sorry, I'm interrupting, I'll go." She started to turn her face flushing,

"Nah its ok Kate, Zee just fell asleep." He stood back, "Come in."

Kate walked in and saw the credits of a movie rolling, Tony walked over and switched it off, "Make yourself comfortable, I'll just put some more clothes on."

Upstairs Ziva quickly pretended to sleep as she heard Tony's footsteps. He walked into the room, the door squeaking slightly. She raised her head as though she just woke up.

"Tony?" She mumbled,

"Hey Sweet Cheeks, we have a guest, go back to sleep baby."

Ziva moaned and put her head back on the pillow, though raised an arm. Tony walked to her and gave her a soft kiss, "Sweet dreams, Zee."

"Mmm," Ziva kissed him again then mumbled, "Love you."

"I love you too." He pulled on his pants and a shirt and left the room, leaving the door open.

As Tony walked down the stairs, Kate looked at photos, all of the team. Gibbs, Jenny, McGee, Abby, Paula Cassidy (Kate glared at it, she had always flirted with Tony), she noticed there weren't any of her.

"I could never face putting them up." Said Tony as though reading her mind, "I was so upset when I thought you were dead. It broke my heart." The last part was whispered and Ziva couldn't hear,

"Me too." Whispered Kate, and she turned, "I regretted my discission every day."

Tony brought a hand to Kate's cheek, caressing it softly. Kate lent into the touch, her heart beat quickening.

"Ohh, how life would be different Puppy."

"Monster." Breathed Kate, her eyes fluttering, se lifted her head, shifting her weight to her tip toes, and Tony tilted his head, leaning down.

Their lips barely touched, when Kate suddenly jerked back and Tony puled away muttering, "We can't; Ziva."

Kate wiped the tears forming in her eyes, "How long have you known her anyway?"

"I first met her the day after you 'died'." Said Tony, wiping his mouth then running his hand through his hair.

Kate opened her mouth in shock and disgust, "So you started rebounding the next day!"

"What?! No! Kate it took me a year to even consider dating another woman, and when I did it was for an undercover mission!"

"So you didn't let yourself move on? Did you talk to anyone? A shrink?"

"A shrink?! Tony DiNozzo does not go to shrinks."

"Tony you thought I had died! Didn't you feel at all…?" Her voice failed and she resisted the urge to wipe the fresh tears from her face, "So you beat yourself up and bottled everything up, then slept with some suspect or murderer or something then fell in love with some twenty-something girl from abroad, moving in together after only eight months, four of which you were both completely out of contact! Jesus Christ Tony!" As she spoke her voice went louder and louder until eventually she was yelling,

"What Kate? What! You think I'm moving to fast?! Well excuse me! I don't see why this concerns you! Sure, you're a friend Kate, but it's not like I'm marrying her! It's not like we're about to start a family! So button the hell out of it!"

Kate had tears streaming off her face and she slapped him hard across the face. "It concerns me, because we were in love! Because we were something special! God, Tony I've never taken off this damn promise ring you gave me!" She shoved it in his face, "And now you're with her! Tony she's a nice girl but that's just it, she's a girl! She's what, twenty-five, twenty-six?"

"She's twenty-seven. And no Kate, it does not concern you! Yes, there was a time we were something special, when I couldn't imagine life without you, but you ruined that, didn't you?! Did you really expect to fake your death then four years later you could just waltz back into your old life, into our relationship; did you really think I wouldn't have found someone else?! I love Ziva! I will never, never leave her! You had your chance Kate! But you let it go! You let go your whole life!"

"Tony!" Wailed Kate, "Tony I'm sorry! If I could go back… If I could change what I did…" Her voice failed and she heaved heavy sobs.

For ten minutes Ziva couldn't hear anything. And when Kate looked up at Tony and whispered fifteen painful words, she couldn't hear,

"Tony I never stopped being in love with you… and I doubt I ever will."

Tony looked her in the eye, "Me too."

What do you think? Reviews are love, flames are hate.

Next chapter is set during 6x03 Capitol Offence