A series of conversations between Lestrade, Sherlock and John as they compare themselves and those around them to characters from other works of fiction. With occasional appearance from other characters. The first line is by Kallie Lestrade.

For Jack63kids, Happy Birthday! I bet you didn't expect this analogy!

I do not own any of the characters of BBC Sherlock, nor any of the literal works mentioned in these stories.

At the café

"So, Mr. Sherlock, have you read 'Pride and Prejudice'?"

"Is this about you're term project for English?"

"Jane Austin is an excellent choice, Kallie! You have a lot of material to help you with your paper as well."

"That's what I thought, Dr. John. But our teacher told me to do a character study. She said that I should write a description of the characters as if they were real people that I know."

"Hah!" John managed to say.

"That's certainly a creative twist. I wish my teacher had given me an assignment like that in school, then I could have described Mycroft as one of the nasty characters in my book of choice!" Sherlock had a mischievous gleam in his eyes.

"Sherlock, that's brilliant! You can describe the people you know around you and fit them to the book's characters, Kallie!"

"Like you and Uncle Greg usually do!"

"Exactly!"

"Great, this is going to be the most fun project I have ever had!" Kallie exclaimed. "Okay, so let me see, which character should I write first?"

"Don't over-think it, Kallie," John offered. "It'll be easier if you fit the person to the character than the other way around."

"How so?"

"Describe your Uncle Greg."

"Well, he's a nice man, he is ethical and tolerant, he gets along with Mr. Sherlock, so I'd say very tolerant, and that also means he's easy going as well."

"Okay, so which character in the book is like that?" John prompted.

"Mr. Bennet! He's an intelligent man with an easy going nature."

"Who is surrounded by a lot of idiots!" Sherlock interjected.

"He's also trapped in a horrid marriage!" Kallie said enthusiastically. Then realization hit her "Oh my God! That was bad; don't tell Uncle Greg I said that!"

"We won't." John assured her.

"You're safe as long as your uncle doesn't read your assignment!" Sherlock told her.

"Okay, thanks." Kallie was relieved. "Moving on! Let me see, Anderson can be Mr. Collins. He's pompous, doesn't know when to stop talking-"

"Amen to that!" muttered John.

"-Isn't the brightest bulb in the chandelier-"

"That's putting it mildly!" Sherlock interjected.

"-And is generally on the nerve. I think it's a great fit."

"We have a winner!" John exclaimed.

Kallie wrote it down in her notebook. "Ok, let's see, we have Sargent Donovan."

"Lydia." Sherlock suggested.

"No, she's not exactly an air head. She's rude and arrogant, but she's not silly." John replied

"Oh, I've got it! Miss Bingley, Mr. Bingley's obnoxious sister." Kallie said excitedly. "This is so fun! Too bad I don't have enough people to fit all of the book's characters. How about Miss Molly? She's shy and sweet, like Georgiana Darcy."

"You're getting the hang of this pretty quickly, Kallie!" John said amiably.

"Oh ya, I'm on the role here! Mr. Sherlock is like Elizabeth Bennet and you're like Jane Bennet."

"What?!" John and Sherlock exclaimed in unison.

"It's a great fit. I need to tweak the descriptions a bit, but that's literature for you."

"What on earth induced you to make those analogies?" Sherlock asked incredulously.

"In case you hadn't noticed, we lack a very important characteristic to fit the description. We're not girls!" John was annoyed.

Kallie cleared her throat "Allow me to explain. Mr. Sherlock is intelligent; he's witty and has a sharp tongue. He gathers a frightening amount of information on his first meeting with people. We can say he relies on his first impression of people. He also has a total disregard for social conventions and does things his own way."

"You're not going to use our names in your paper, are you?" Sherlock asked tentatively.

"No, I'm only describing the book's characters, I won't be naming any names."

"I still don't think I fit Jane's description." John objected.

"Between the two of you, you're the mild mannered and polite one. Jane calmed Lizzie down when she was agitated. She is patient and tries to see the good in people."

"You're only using one side of my character." John muttered.

"Besides, you two act like brothers already, you're a perfect fit for the sisters!"

John started laughing "I should go and ask Sally if she has a sister for me!"

"Don't even joke about it John!" Sherlock said alarmed.

John was laughing harder. "I should keep an eye on you to make sure a Ms. Wickham wouldn't charm you!"

Sherlock snorted "What next? You're going to find a Ms. Darcy for me?"

Kallie giggled "this is going to be a great essay, thanks guys!"

"Glad to be of service!" Sherlock said with a smirk.

*Ping*

-Get in the car, this is important. MH

Sherlock snorted. "Come along John, we have been summoned by Lady Catherine de Bourgh!"