Title: Until We Reach Valinor

Chapter 8: Second Chances

NOTE: This story is sequel to "A Teacher's Duty" and you'll have to read that one first to understand this. Also, this story does not contain slash, and it is not a romance, despite what the first chapter might suggest.

SPECIAL THANKS to Orlando's Sweetheart for helping me pick the name of the woman Legolas's bride-to-be as well as the title of this story.

That said, on with the chapter.

…

Legolas sighed deeply. "Linnor…" He began, and broke off. For the first time in a very long time, he was at a loss for words. "I don't…know what to say…" He shrugged his shoulders hopelessly, "I don't know what you expect me to say. How… how could you be so…stupid?"

"You wouldn't understand, sir," Linnor said, a slight sullenness creeping into her usually tempered voice.

"Then make me understand," Legolas persisted, "I…I can't believe…I talked to you Linnor! I told you not to do anything reckless! If you weren't convinced then, why didn't you tell me!"

"Because…this was just something I needed to do! And I knew you wouldn't understand if I told you!"

"But I thought you understood it wasn't your fault that I got hurt last year!"

"I did understand that!" she exclaimed, "It's just…I realized that if it wasn't my fault, then it had to be the spiders' fault. By elimination."

"Do you have any idea how ridiculous that sounds?" Legolas asked incredulously.

"No, but by the tone of your voice, sir, I can tell how ridiculous you think it sounds." she said accusingly.

"Listen to me!" Legolas exclaimed, "When orcs kill people, people don't blame the orcs for it. So many of my friends have died at their hands, but I have never, ever tried to avenge them by swearing to kill every orc that exists. I'll kill the ones responsible for the deaths, I'll kill the people who sent the orcs, but it makes no sense just to suddenly swear vengeance on all orcs! It's in an orcs' nature to kill. Yes, you could hate it for that. But orcs were once Elves. Did you know that Linnor?"

She shook her head.

"Yes. They were deformed and mutilated by evil powers and made what they are today. They deserve pity, not hatred."

"But sir, if that's true, why are you even running this school? The only real enemies left to be eliminated on earth are the orcs. You said so yourself. That's the whole point of this school."

"Linnor, it maybe our duty to kill them out of self-preservation, but that does not mean we have to hate them. And by that I mean, hate them especially. Everyone hates orcs and spiders because of what they are by nature. But as long as that hatred doesn't cause them to put themselves in undue, unnecessary danger-"

"Sir, you cannot liken an orc to a spider! It simply isn't-" Linnor began.

"Why, Linnor, which would you say is worse?" Legolas interrupted her.

"The orcs, of course," she said in surprise, "Sir, it's not as though-"

"I never know with you, Linnor. You've been so stubborn lately. Sometimes I wonder how someone as sensitive and tactful as you cannot understand that your hatred for the spiders is born out of the guilt you still feel for what happened last year. Despite the fact that I told you it wasn't your fault."

"I am not feeling guilty!" Linnor shouted, startling Legolas with the force of her anger, "Why must you always be so-?" She cut herself off before she said something she would regret, contenting herself with glaring herself.

"Did it feel good then?" Legolas asked after a pause loaded with tension, "Did you feel as though you'd finally battled your demons when you hacked at those spiders for all you were worth?"

"Yes," Linnor said defiantly.

Legolas looked at her with a questioning expression. She looked down.

"No," she admitted in a low voice.

Legolas studied her for a moment. "Are you being honest with me?" He asked her, "Do you really mean that?"

"Yes, I do, sir." she answered, looking him straight in the eye.

"If I let this matter go now," Legolas said, treading cautiously, "Can you promise me that you will never behave so recklessly again? Can you promise me that you will stop blaming yourself for something which is not your fault?"

"The former I can promise you," She replied, "I know I was reckless. I could have probably done a lot more good and learnt a lot more by staying in formation. But something in me snapped when I saw those spiders."

"Is it going to snap again?" Legolas asked her.

"I don't think so, sir. But I can't be sure. And I don't know if I can stop blaming myself. Or if I have already."

Legolas sighed, "Is that the best answer I'm going to get from you at the moment?"

"I'm afraid it is, sir. I need some time to think about this and…recover."

"I understand," Legolas said, though he didn't, not really. He rose, and calling Elano up to sit by Linnor, climbed down. He sensed that Linnor needed some time alone, and although he was hardly satisfied by the outcome of their conversation, he was willing to wait and see how this would all turn out.

…

Elano watched his teacher with some concern. He had been silent and worried all day. Twice Elano had tried to convince him to rest, and both times Legolas had waved his persuasions away. Elano's eyes followed his restless movements as he paced up and down. He had been doing so for the last two hours. It was time for a confrontation.

"Sir?" He said tentatively.

"Yes, Elano?"

"You seem to be waiting for something," Elano said, broaching the subject tentatively.

Legolas saw through the attempt and gave the Elf a wry smile, "Yes, it is something Linnor said to me, and no, I'm not going to go to sleep on it." He told Elano, who blushed slightly at how well the teacher had managed to read him.

"It's just…"

"I know," Legolas cut him off, "You're worried about me. I can read it in your face. But I'm worried about Linnor, and at the moment, that's all I can think about."

"That's the problem with you, sir," Elano sighed in frustration, "When will you ever start thinking about yourself?"

"Am I supposed to answer that question?"

"No, but you can answer this question. Why are you worried about Linnor? She'll come around. You should have faith in her good sense."

"I did before, just two days ago, and look where that got us."

"You should give her another chance," Elano said earnestly, "Everyone deserves one, and Linnor most of all. Last year, she was the first to have faith in you. She gave you a second chance, and you did not disappoint her. She won't disappoint you either. Just give her a chance."

"Where do second chances come into the picture?" He asked, "It's not as though we're going to go to attack spiders every other day. Most likely, the next time I'll know if she still blames herself for what happened last year will be years and years into the future when she goes and gets herself killed. Because I won't be there. I can't follow her about all her life. I need to know if she's stopped blaming herself after what happened."

"Sir, you misunderstand me," Elano answered, "I don't mean giving her a second chance to 'prove herself' to you again. I'm just asking you not to treat her any differently than you've been doing up to this point. I know you well enough to know that you've already done your best with her. Now just leave it be. Stop worrying. Act as though this didn't happen."

"I can't."

"You're not going to get an answer from her today or tomorrow or even next month. She has to answer herself first, and doing so will take time. Give her that time, go about your life as you would normally, treat her just the same as you've always done, and one day, be it tomorrow or a decade from now, you'll know her answer."

"I don't know if I can wait that long."

"For Valar's sake, if you don't give it time you might pressure her into saying something she doesn't mean! Are you willing to pay that price in the future just so you can hear a hasty answer now?"

"No" Legolas sighed deeply, "I wish you did not put things into perspective quite so well Elano. You always manage to leave me with no option."

"Sir, I'm only trying to-"

"I know that. It's just…it's not easy to confront, having to…to…"

"To let go?"

"Yes. To let go. Exactly," He shook his head regretfully.

"It never is easy, sir. But it has to be done. If you don't do this now, you'll regret it for the rest of your life. And I think you know that, in your heart."

"I do know that," Legolas said softly, "You don't have to tell me."

He thought he should say something more, but couldn't. Words had failed him for the second time that day. And perhaps, that was for the best, he thought to himself as he stared in the direction of the tree house with distant eyes. For what more was there left to say?

…

"Sir?" Linnor asked sleepily. It was morning, and she had woken up to find him staring down at her as though with a queer expression on his face which she couldn't quite place.

"Good morning, Linnor." He squatted down beside her, "How are you feeling?"

"Well enough, I suppose," she said warily, expecting him to ask her if she had made up her mind, which she hadn't.

"Well enough to enjoy a short holiday?" he asked instead.

"What, sir?" Linnor asked, confused.

"I decided that since my little…experiment…with the spiders was such a success, I could well afford to give you an off until we return home. Soon enough, you'll be studying for your graduation. You all deserve a break. Especially since most of you fared so well."

Linnor stared at him in undisguised amazement, "Fared so well, sir?" What in the world was he talking about? She had behaved so recklessly, she'd made a complete mess of everything, and he was talking about having a holiday?

"Yes," Legolas said surprisingly, "Wouldn't you call fifty-five people out of seventy-two being able to hold their own against an army of spiders without help a success?"

Linnor just gaped at him.

"You're not the only one by whom I measure my successes in the class, Linnor," he said, clarifying things for her as he chose to leave, "Even if not for you, fifty-five out seventy-two is a fairly lofty majority. I still call it a success. And for that reason, I think everyone deserves a holiday."

Linnor had finally understood the motive behind his detached words. He was giving her time; time to make up her mind, and in the meantime speaking to her just as he would normally. Her heart swelled with gratitude.

"Thank you sir," she said softly as he climbed down.

"You're more than welcome," he answered, and although he wasn't satisfied, he knew he had done the right thing.

…

TBC…

So sorry for the lateness of this chapter! Have had a hectic exam week which has driven me literally insane. Luckily, I came out of it in one piece. However, with two more mocks coming up in April and a final CIE exam in May, I wouldn't expect quick updates from me for a while yet.

Many thanks to my reviewers! If you're interested, I've written a War of the Worlds (movie) one-shot fic called "No Easy Answers." About Ray and the aftermath of the alien invasion. Read it, but only if you've seen the movie, or it won't make sense to you. Cheers!